Relationships  Discussion Forum

we are married 2 yrs ago. we came to u.s for one year and now we r going to india. i am having problems with inlaws and my husband's brothers from the begining after our marriage. my parents are also angry on them. now we have to go to india for vacation. recently my husband bought a new flat in hyd. inlaws and his brothers are staying in that. we have no place in our own flat. my husband didn't buy even a chain for me since our marriage. he is not not even giving a value to me as his wife. neither his parents nor his brothers are not seeing me as a person in that family. they are also playing drama before him showing fear, suffering, hesitation and shy to me. when he is gone they are talking and behaving as if i am an unwanted person in that house and extra burden to them. i don't know how to prove their cunningness to my husband. he thinks that i and my parents are teasing and torchuring them. they are playing love and affection to him and telling him that my parents are saying bad to everyone about them. but my parents asked our friends that is my parents collegues and friends and discussed about the problems. they never discussed about the people.
i know that. my parents said to me that they asked about solution for my problems in their friends and social circle. thats it. nothing bad.
but every word is changed and reversed when reached to the final destination ear that is to my husband. he thinks that my parents are telling bad to people about their parents. i know that inlaws and his brothers changed the matter and told him in reverse position. but he believes them and desperately need them. all this is happening from the begining after the marriage. but when we came to u.s my parents knew who are involved in between me amd my husband. they now want to take me. we have to first land in madras and then we have to go hyd.
when we go to madras, my parents want to take me with them. they don't want to send me with my husband to hyd to his new flat. but i want to prove him who are coming in between me and my husband. what happens when i go with my parents?
atleast even then will he try to solve all the mystery problems and try to see facts and truths?
i don't know. i want to know whether i have to be with him or not. so please read this with patience and give me an advice as a well wisher.
i don't any hopes on my life. please help me. S replied. Please don't expect things to get right in a jiffy. When relations are involved these things are very sensitive and if you are as smart as I think you are, don't over-react. Firstly get your parents out of this.I understand they are concerned, but it is almost always a mistake to get them involved and only makes things worse. You can tell them that now things are fine and that you can sort out the problems yourself and that they should not worry and try to repair your relationship with your inlaws. Maybe when the time is right and when your husband trusts you again, you can talk about moving out. Frankly I dont know how practical this is, but I know you'll need a lot of patience and tolerance if you want to save your marriage.