Relationships  Discussion Forum

friends,
Somehow we all suffer from inlaws.And the major portion of our agony is \" Y dont he realise what his parents are\" ?! Think ,think and think ...If husband accept and admit to wife \" yes, u r right, inlaws r made of wrong thoughts\" ...Definitely we' ll not bother about many things.


Even if we exclude those sort of problems ...many times we get irritated with DOUBLE STANDARDS followed by inlaws. A set of rules for them and their ' for' s . And different rules in same situations for us...It make us more annoyed.

In my case, I get irritated mostly when my inlaws follow double standards and show to their son as clean persons...Always letting flow their money to their fav daughter and not even buying a single shirt to son...Moreover ,encouraging son to feed his sister in manyways he can... Ok, ok let me cool down... So, I get irritated becasue my hubby doesnt see they can afford jewelry for daughter but cant afford a dress for himself. So ,it nags my mind very much when my hubby sympothise them.

My mom and my ' inner soul' says, \" Y cant u be so matured ? U r so educated and gifted a good life to lead with...Then, Y dont u leave them for their greedy natures??\"
Yes, that is right.
But ,I answer...I can be broadminded,Only wehn my hubby realise the fact that they r greedy with him. But he never can admit his own parents r not ssupportive to him...So I never can forgive them for thier double standards. Yes, I talk to them nice... I maintain good rappo with them...everything is fine. But its my mind tells me they r bad parents to my dear hubby. So I feel strong to convey in how many ways they show double standards to his son/VS/Daughyter...
But cant do it. Because it just shows him I' m complaining always but no way useful regardless how truthful I' m .

So friends,i dont have any problems except mental disturbance. Then Y do I get irritated when I think of them? Yes, they r made like this...In 6yrs I came to know about it...And In some more years he' ll get to know himself when they live with us...

Y do I get irritated when I see them buying lakhs of gold for daughter and asking money from son for buying little comforts for themselves?
Yes, when he doesnt have problem with it...and when he still love them dearly... Why shd I bother? After all , my hubby is responsible for hiswife and daughter..when he is ready to afford them things and want to be good son, regardless how bad parents they r...Why shd I get irritated??

Its because woman mind I own?? NO ?!! then what is this called? Pl tell me how to practice plain and fair mind which can never find all faults they have.

yesterday,I was praying god to provide me good nature to forgive my inlaws for thier double standards. But in the veyr morning ,my hubby was scolding his Aunts (his father' s sisters) for grabbing his granny' s money. I' m again wondered at double standards he learnt thru parents ....whats wrong if they did it?ha?...NOW, his mom too behaving like his granny ,and his sister turned to his aunts....he find no fault now???! GOd, again my mood has spoilt and felt like shouting and yelling same standards are being implemented in our case too!!! But,If I say it loud... he withdraws himself from talking about family matters again. so ,kept quite...


Again now, I' m praying god, provide me good heart to forgive my hubby for his ignorance and insanity (he is insane only in his parents case , Or he is a very clever in other matters including my case.)He act so smart with me !

Ok, friends, money is a big enemy to human bonds. It can create relations (ex:dowry ,LOL!!) and it can spoil relations . So ,I feel lets not mind money based issues. though its hard ,lets be women of new genration...Not caring any issues that does relate to money.


I know today I' m sounding very very boring :!!!!! :)

But, felt like writing to all of you what I' m feeling now...Because I love my pals for caring and sharing!! ) !!

Cheers, tell me views to change our mindset to new generation. sonu1 replied. hi....
i was in the same boat as u...it used to bother me but now i dont let it....u just have to turn a blind eye sometimes otherwise it just get to you...my dh is the same will not speak up or say anything as he dont like confrontation but to be honest there is a limit to everything and sometimes u just have to speak up and then if things dont get better u just walk away and leave it...one day ur dh will realise tht what his parents are doing and then wake up until then u just carry on doing what u want and looking after ur daughter.....
Dont waste time on people that dont have time for you.....
good luck