Parents of Teens  Discussion Forum

i m 18 yrs old... n i feel like suciding, i jst finnished my 12th waiting 4 results,my parents keep on fighting, my dad is out going to dance bars, my mom is hving 3 bottles of corex to sleep,my dad dont evn giv me cash for my personal use..i tried working in a call centre, bt my parents stop me after 15 days of work, i m frustrated,i thought to b com a model bt tht also my parents disagree, i cut my self whn i m angry, this is frm whn i was 8 yrs .. i kidda enjoy cutting my self n c the blood flow... i guess i m going mental,i hv a strong hatered whn guys try to ask me for dates or try to feel me up.. wht shld i do?? Dipak replied. Hi,

Think practically. Yours is not a problem in the first place. You atleat have parents and a place to stay, I had no parents, no home and no money..forget about relatives. Just try and belive that man can do anything. I was destined to become a rikshawala but today I am an well-known engineer representing India in various international forums and pannels. Let me be frank...you father is possibly a gone case.... Yes, you have a mother, probably escaping through the corex route. Father like this has no meaning but you are indebted to your mother' s womb and thus try to get her rid of the corex think immotionally..just make her realise that you can even start a new life and provide her a place to live in and earn just within 2-3 years. You can give her a life and start afresh with her and earn for your living without your colourfull father. Do not be sad, you can easily do it. Its just easy...And forget these nonesences like cutting yourself,, commiting sucide...do not talk foolish and try to gain our sympathy with such words...be sure..you will never commit sucide ... so.. start living and take responsibility of your mother. Remember you will get a direction in life only when you take some responsibility...and belive me ... (though I am not experienced in this case) living for mother is perhaps the best thing you can do. Keep me mailing if you feel but never mail me should you decide to remain a mercy/sympathy monger. Best of luck..... amanda replied. KK
I am sorry you feel this way can we talk about it. I come from a similar situtation. I know that it does get better. sgs replied. Nice to hear that you understand what you are feeling. stay with it. it should lead you to your own destiny. but remember your parents will be insignificant. nothing is that significant that you should be worrying about - nothing is permenant. be on look out for your destiny - this too shall pass. the more majestic-the more mighty- the more courageous- the more magnanimous- the more inspiring - the more devine should be your direction of progress attentionNULL replied. I am going to be brutally honest. I am speaking from a professional point of view and as a reformed cutter. Yes people who cut themselves are known as cutters in the mental health industry. You really need to get help for this. Its a very negative way to resolve feelings. I do find it surprising that you would so openly talk about it, sutters are a secretive bunch who rarly if EVER share that secret. Funny that you should want to be a model. You openly admit to being a cutter and also wish to enter an attention seeking industry while claming to wish to kill yourself. Suicide is not often talked about by those who wish to do so. Personally I think this is a little bit of sympathy play for attention.... Thats from me the almost-phsychiatrist(I have almost finished my degree) and me the person who used to cut. Now before you think that I am negating your feelings please read on.

What your parents do is not your concern. It does affect you and it causes pain but you are taking on unnecessary stress and looking to solve problems that you cant fix. This is their issue and you have to let it be theirs. Are your parents so caught up in their own problems that they have little time for you? So many have the same story and want so much to make things better for those arounfd them. I really feel sorry for you. There are thousands of teens in your position, worried about life, the future and still struggling to discover who they are.

You need to take a step back and look at you. Who are you? What should you be focused on, what pain or worry can you let go of? Emotional baggage weighs us down and continues to hurt us. You are waiting for your results and this is a harrowing time for all of us, we can not plan our future until these precious results come in...

Time to evaluate your life. Set some goals and work toward them. If you think working is a way to earn money and to establish who you are than talk with your parents about it and try to get their support. As an exercise I want you to imaging you are in a bubble... About 2 meters wide, what doesnt enter isn't something you need to worry about, what doesnt affect your bubble needs to be placed aside. Worry about the bubble. The smaller picture is all you need KK right now. As you stablize you can extend the bubble but right now... Keep it small, for your own mental health. Do take care and please keep posting your worries... We are here to help udbhav replied. just think for a while,, before u think od suicide, thinking of comitting suicide is being a coward, u need to live and live with all of it. parents will made to fight according to me, they do all the while,,, in my own case they fight for all trivial reasons but now ive got used to it,, they have their probs,, let them be,, u do stuff you like,, sing dance,, try to distract your mind from faamily... well wisher replied. Well I can understand your situation at home with your parents. But not sure what you would gain by ending your life.
Have your thought little more about yourself ( not of your parents ) , think and write down the following
1. What things you are good at , what are your hobbies.?
2. What sort of person you admire
3. What you need to do to reach your
goal in life.
Work towards it, it hardly matters what your parents do, your are 18 year old, its time that your shape up your career and life and work for something better.
May be join some nice classes such as music /martial arts/ dance try to be best in whichever your like, beleive me you would start forgetting that your ever thought of suicide. there is indeed a lot to achieve in life, if your plan it well and do right things, does not matter who your parents were.
If you need more help write back in the forum, I can help you.