Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi LADIES,its me again......you must have read my 2 previous posts on 12dec.
Ever since I have come back from my in laws place, I n my hubby are not sharing a gud relationship.Though we speak necessary things like whether he needs tea, snacks,abt bills n all but no gud n close conversation happens b/n us which shud happen b/n husband n wife.
I want to share soo many things with him ..I want to tell him that I had to be li' l rude wid his mom b' coz she was humiliating me ...she spoke bad things abt my parents but he never shoews any interest in tlking to me. He is either waching Tv or sitting on inernet.We have lost love for each other.
Our family life has got soo disturbed now. Sometimes he gets irritated for small things n starts yellling at me in font of house maids.. i feel very insulted.

I have one mopre problem from hubby abt which I have now started thinking v seriously.My hubby , though earning quite well,isn' t fond of gud clothes, dressing up fine n not very particular abt hygine. on the contrary I am very particular abt my dress up. I make sure to be in gud clothes n always keep myself neat n tidy.He doesn' t even likes taking bath on weekends.

I have got soo much disturbed because of all these things ... sometimes feel like getting a divorce from him ... my sis says I SHUDN' T TAKE SUCH A STEP. as per her views its difficult for a female to survive in this indian society after a divorce...what do u all suggest ladies? Namita replied. my first advice is NOT to leave job. this is not a solution nor a divorse is solution ... yes, couples do fight there are differences and at time one partner streches the issue so much that the other feels like leaving him/her, suicide etc. etc. ... dear, all this happens in every relations

There is nothing wrong in ur married life, first make urself belive this ... this differences CANNOT create rift bet. u 2 forever, this can never lessen ur love for each other

sorry i dont have time right now to read ur last post but wht i can suggest tht u continue being good and normal to him, but not pleasing. BE normal. let him shout, once he is calm just speak out wht hurted u, ur insult in front of maid whtever ... bt this should be very short and never wait there for his reply ... cry a little in front of him or behind him but he shud know this .. it works

never think abt divorse for this silly thing ... though i m suggessting u even i had felt quite a time, but i know we think so due to frustrating situations and bcoz its always us who suffer and try to fix things .. but dont worry once he vl realises he vl b playing ur role, belive me

after few days try to be romantic goodie with him ......... nver mind if he shoos u ... move away n shout on him (dont fight) .. tell him tht u both shud not spoil ur days for this things, u both have to see lot many prob' s and lot many good and bad things in future and have to b with each other, so ther is not point in hurting each other .. he might say that he dont need u, n that really hurts ... tell him even u can say the same but u love him etc. etc... BE CALM

ask him to listen to u at once, dont let him interupt much when u are taking out all ur frustratin and expaling him wht exactly happened .. cry a bit while explaining him.... show him deeply how u were hurt

ss, u have to show ur feelings to others even if it is ur spouse no one will understand it by guessing, he will always think from his point of view and his parents point of view ... u have to show him how u feel and how u think

AT THE END : ask him to listen to u and then decide whether u were right or wrong Srey replied. Hey and what is wrong with not taking baths on the weekend? I sometimes do this too. *Laughing* Actually I don' t even brush my teeth. Yep! you better believe it. On my days off, All I want to do is stay in my Pajamas, order in, and watch tv all day. The hubby....well, if this is how he wants to spend his weekend, why not join him, right? LOL Both is happy and relaxed.

*now on work days and going out, that another story. Presentation is Everything!!

Having said that, Yeah this is not a good reason for Divorce. Why, would you want to leave him? Mama' s boy huh, if he is one...why not be a Mama' s girl too?

Just get even with your MIL and Husband.

-Buy two identical saree. You wear one, your MIL wear one...Now, when your husband see the two of you. I bet, you look better than your MIL, right? *Wink* This will atleast make your Mama' s boy hubby see that, not everyone look good in the same outfit. I bet she don' t ever want to dress in your saree again. hehe

-Giving money...Okay, its understandable. And Since your hubby earns a lot,*cool* and he seemed to give a lot to his side of the family. Just do the same to yours.

-to improve your relationship with your Hubby...Less time talking and more time listening to him. You know that whenever a person is angry, speaking will only make it worst, it best to let the person cool..then come back to them and have a calm voice. Can you do that? If all else fails, Compromise. Try to think of something that will make him happy and in return, he have to do this for you and etc..

Best of Luck.