Relationships  Discussion Forum

I had posted some days back about my super moody MIL(Ritika,shravani,XYZ and Lakshmi might remmeber). Well ,Im back with an update - not for the good,though.
MIL seemed OK for a few days and things became terrible one night. I was holding the baby in one hand and clearing the left overs after dinner ,when MIL popped out of the kitchen and started scolding me for not letting her do that. Tell me,is that not insane? I was trying to help her and this woman tells me that Im testing her if she' s coming forward to help me. Then she broke into an angry outburst about how I sideline her , about how unhappy she is from the time she landed in my house and what scum Iam like her other DIL.
What did I do wrong here? When I told her that I only tried to help her out , she told me that Im putting up an act...Thru all this ,my dh kept quite. When I looked up at him to back me, he simply pleaded with me to keep quite and came around later and comforted me. I didnt talk to MIL for a couple of hours and tried acting natural ,but this woman has this grudge and tries to get away and complains that she wants to go back asap. Im trying to keep a coll head ,but I crack up sometimes . Anyways ,thanks for ltting me vent.
Tony S replied. Dear Swapna,
i remember your prev. post also. do not worry. ILs can be v. moody due to many reasons, one is age and second is the entry of DIL into the lives of their sons, they feel they r unwanted material. so even if u r 100% perfect they will surely try to point out some fault or the other , after all they cannot stand the DIL however good she is. the best thing to do when someone outbursts is to keep quiet. u did the right thing by being normal after 2 hours, be the same. but let her not feel that ' your khamoshi is your kamjori' . when she is in a good mood, u can convey the message u want to without hurtuing her. inspite of that if she again goes back to her usual behaviour, just keep mum. and start ignoring her. give her respect, ask her if she had her food, etc. when u guys r having your lunch/dinner, see that she eats well and takes her medicines on time if she is taking any, etc. do all these typical ' bahu duties' . god is watching everything. but dont be deterred by her mood swings or by what she says. do your bit of housework which i am sure u r doing. give her more importance thru your baby. eg. when u talk to the baby tell the baby\" where is dadi, see there she is\" etc. and sing some dadi songs or stories so she will feel loved by the baby if not by u !!!!! all the best.