Relationships  Discussion Forum

I have a SIL who has been very meddlesome in all aspects of my married life for the past 6 yrs of my married life.She would call about 20 times a day and talk to my husband.Earlier she used to insist i talk too at all times but i put my foot down and told her to let me have my privacy.She complained to my MIL and now I am the culprit according to them.MY SIL has a husband and a daughter but she would neglect even them and make time to talk to my husband.Everytime i have arow with my husband it is bcse of her.
She talks really dirty sometimes with my husband too.She will talk about her getting her periods and how her cramps hurt her.How she had a PAP smear test and how much it hurt her.How when she delivered every hour she was in labour she used to talk to my husband and tell him how much she had dilated and how hard it was for her to push and then she would even discuss her breastfeeding problems with my husband.MY MIL does not find anything odd about her discussing such stuff with her brother.I would not discuss it so openly with my husband too and here she discusses all this with her brother!!!!
I have a fight with my husband and ask him if he is not shameful of discussing stuff like this with his sister.He says he does not say anything but he does not tell her to stop this discussion too.I cannot make out what kind of a relationship they have.It troubles me a lot.

Otherwise my husband is a really very sweet and caring person but the only and main trouble i have is my SIL.I can still manage with my MIL and FIL.but my SIL!She is really a monster in my life.

Please advise. VALSALA NAIR replied. Hi HP,

All mother' s or MILS are very curious to see their daughter or DIL becomes pregnant.

If your mother in law asked that question to her son I don' t feel anything wrong. Her curiosity to see her grand children forced her to ask this question to her son. Nothing more!!!

Buying condom for you is a different type of thing. TRY TO SEE THE DIFFERENCE.

Nothing more to write. preeti replied. hi ruchi,

hp, chameli has given very smart advice.i fully agree with them. u should make ur husband understand this through clever examples.
sil is crossing limits way too much. u dnt have to put up with this nonsense. stand up now !!

hope this stops soon. dddd replied. Ruchi i can understand how you feel.I too have a SIL similar to yours.she is many many yrs elder to my husband but acts like she is young and talk about anything with him giving the name of being cultured. She asked my husband how was our .... after wedding .Its nobody' s business how is it is in our life?even my mom or sisters dont ask such things. So then i told my husband dont tell her anything i dont like it. He stopped and when my husband didnt tell her anything she did a big drama telling they are family and we shud come back to india to be with them. We live in US and they in India.All this conversation was on e-mail and chats.
now thanks to my husband ' s attitude i give her back when she oversteps.he wont support me but wont say no if i give her back .you shud do that. why dont u try to give her back ?if you fo it 3-4 times she will know and stop.
Best of luck .post back. chameli replied.
Hey Ruchi,

U really don' t put up with this.Every woman would like her husband to know certain things(like dilation,labour..) only through her.No woman will let her husband hear this stuff from others.What does ur SIL' s husband think about her speaking all these things to brother.He doesn' t care?

You speak to ur husband and ask him to change topics when she starts such things.Gradually she will stop.

If that doesn' t work.When u get a chance when all family members are there tell aloud something like \" Your brother told me story of labor.What a pity u had such dilations and all that stuff\" . Let everyone know what stuff she' s speaking with brother.Her husband should also know.Then she might stop. hp replied. hi frd,

what to say yaar.... my mil is this kinda lady.... after 2 months of marr she asked my hubby are you taking precautions (god .. too much) than there were few instances where she crossed here limit.... so i openly talked to my MIL i said dont like your discussing all this stuff with hubby there shd be some decency ( i used word lihaz) ... i said what if i go to FIL and say plzz pa go and buy a packet of whisper for me.... after that till date she hasn' t tried to interfare in our very personal matters

you tell ur hubby how do u feel if i go to FIL and tell him to buy a packet of sanitary napins for me or if you are going to mkt so can you plz buy a bra of this size and that particular shop ... NO na so tell him if he can' t say not to cross limits to her dear sis better he shd tell his mother to make sis understand abt how what to talk ... or say i will satrt talking in same manner to sis' s hubby!! BE firm
bye
hp

update me on your sistuation