Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi
This is my first post. I usually keep things to myself and never post. But right now I am unbeable so thought I will post. My husband is the youngest of 5 brothers. They are very very close to each other. Initially we lived in the same cities but later split because of jobs. All of them are so close that they interfere in each's others life to the extent of what to buy, what coffee to drink and what to eat. I have been a very independent person all my life. I dont mind a little interference but not to the extent where people decide what I should eat and what name I should keep for my child. If we want to buy a house, they tell us where to buy when to buy. what kind of a house to buy etc.. My husband loved them too much to say or think anything about them. He cannot even tell them not to interfere . He just loves them and listens to everything they say. Both of us work the whole week like crazy and during the weekends , I want to spend time with my husband and my little daugther. But this does not happen. Every saturday morning we will get a call from BILS' saying what we have to do. They will say let us meet somewhere and play tennis,golf,cricket or cards or whatever. My husband will say ok and will be there. The whole weekend goes away spedning time with them. All our works will be pending. If I bring up the issue, my husband gets mad at me. He does not understand my concept of being together. For him all his brothers are his family too. He does not understand the concept of me treating just him,myself and my daughter as family. I am just fed up with life. I mean these are not the only issues. These come up in everything. I have started to feel that my husband does not love me at all. I feel that he should have just stayed with her brothers and not married at all. I dont know what to do. Can somebody help me fix this situation. rani replied. talk to your bil's wifes and how they feel about meeting everyweekend. They may also be feeling the same as you and you all could decide to meet a little less.
Most of the time men start taking their wife for granted. Start making excuses and start sending your hubby alone some weekends. He will not like it and miss you and your daughter and realize your role and importance in his life. This may help reduce his outings with his siblings to some extent.
vai replied. Dear Neha,

I can very well understand your problem. Is there someone who can help you out of this problem like ur in-laws or common friend? U can make that person to talk to ur husband abt this matter. Or maybe if u talk cooly with ur husband things may work out. U can tell him to imagine himself in ur position and how would he have felt then? Try to be as cool and patient as possible while talking to him. Let me know the outcome