Relationships  Discussion Forum

I live in the US with my husband and 2 children and go to India everyyear since my inlaws and my parents are old and they want to see us everyyear. My problem is my SIL who stays in Dubai also visits at the same time everyyear and no matter how I plan my trip we endup staying at my inlaw's around the sametime. Though I get along well with my inlaws(inspite of their favouring my SIL's children more) and manage to get along with my SIL(Inspite of all the taunts and show of Dubai gold),my children have a hard time with her children. My SIL has 2 of the most spoilt children I have seen and they get away with all their bad behavior because their mother and grandparents turn a blind eye to this. They trouble my children no end at everything-food,television,computer etc etc.Both her children are older than mine so my children can't even fight on their own. Though my husband and I scold them at times, we have to be careful so that we dont offend my sil or inlaws. Both my inlaws and SIl are very touchy when critisized and I know for a fact that they would not take it kindly if I was to talk to them about this.We dont want to spoil the atmosphere during our short stay. This time she is going to stay in India for 3 months giving us absolutely no chance to avoid her. My husband wont cancel the trip at any cost. The very thought of the vacation gives me sleepless nights.What do I do? Somebody please help. NULL replied. Don't go. I personally hate favoritists and fakers. Life, is short enough. Spend time with friends and others who CARE about your well being. I, honestly can't believe what I read on this website. just_another_dil replied. Sil and In laws truly is a complicated issue. Firstly, dont try to please anyone.
One thing always remember, speak sweetly bcoz everyone remembers words. But do what you want to do. If you dont feel like staying at In laws place you can spend more time at your parents place.
You are not there to please anyone but have a nice good peaceful vacation.
by the way, does you siser in law not go at her in laws place ??? I mean wont you get any spare time alone at your In laws place ?
Well in anycase, let childeren deal with their issues. Unless the big bullies are beating your kids you dont interfere. Tell your kids to keep away from them. If the bullies beat your kids you can get in between and yell and make a scene also. It wont look bad at all.
Alka replied. Call up your SIL and know her plans. Dont let your plan go to her .
Tell your children and train before hand. Take good books try to keep them busy and also try to have a good image in front of SILs children . Try to attract them may be they start liking you and give good response to you.

Best way is to take them outside during evening times. Plan it in such a way that u spend evening times etc some where else or invite other relatives so that al remains busy. Archie replied. Hi,
Very sorry that it's difficult to deal with such issues.
YOu should talk to your husband and tell him what you feel. If not cancelling the trip then ask him to offer you a support and he watch closely that his own children get what they should and no descriminations.

Or you could spend more time with your parents with your children. Bring your children just for a few days to their paternal grand parents. This should be OK as you give us an impression that their paternal grandparents are not fond of them. Your childrens will be OK with you and their maternal grandparents.

Hope this helps. Ignore if possible.
Archi