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I need advice about what to do about my husbands reactions when any one of kids go to tantrum mode.i am stay at hime mom.my kids are 32 months and 15 months old.we are currently in US.my husbands project is going very busy and he is working very hard,i dont want to blame him either.
my kids have tantrums especially at the end of the day and they fight with each other as well.often these starts even before he gets home from work.i try to seperate them,feed them,divert them and try to make them rested so my musband is not affectd much,his reaction is however is to have tantrums of his own.
for example last night he started screaming at me saying how kids are manipulating us,we need tocontrol them,how bad my parenting is.i get no where on temperment issues.iam totally stressed out.because i not only have to deal with the tantrum but have to be a advocate for my kids.i thought he will be a supportive parent.
is tantrums abnormal with kids.i really need a friend. Supriya replied. Thank you so much friends.i really needed your support.your suggestions were good,i will surely try it out.last night i just couldnt sleep,he is also very tired from office work so after comming home he just has dinner and goes to sleep.now a days when i calculate,it is just not more than 30 min that we talk to each other in a day.kids miss him too,when he comes home they pounce on him and wanted to play but he is too tired to react.hope his project ends soon.
priya my inlaws have 10 years visa and have been here 2 times.i just dont want them here atleast by the time my kids go to school and i get a job.handling them will be worse than my kids.its a different issue.my mom doesent have a passport and she is not bothered to take one because of my kidd brother.my father is working in dubai.so for my second delivery i dint call my mil because she gave me enough treatment when she was here for my first one.so thank you so much for your suggestions.
sahe thank you so much.if i think of i really have a happy family.wonderful hard working husband,great kids,own home,no inlaws or relatives disturbance.you are right i just have to be more supportive to him to go tru this busy phase.
thank you so much friends.it is really nice having you. sahe replied. hey .. things are really challenging for u dear ...

well kids do throw tantrums, but mostly when something is wrong with them. Dont assume you are not being a good mother. Its not easy to manage kids all alone. Sometimes it is also because of pampering them.

I think the either the kids are tired, or need parent's attention so they are throwing tantrums.

Priya has already given u good suggestions. Same time, i think ur hubby is also going a stressful time and needs your support, if not, atleast needs to be left alone.

For next few days, plan for some fav things of kids to be done when hubby comes home. Like, their fav cartoon movie, or new game to play, or visiting park, color book ... Make sure they are hungry around same time and make some fav dishes early.

So when hubby comes home, put on the movie and give them their fav food. They will eat, be busy and sleep tired.

And you too dont have to run around them to manage them and the hubby as well.

So one problem is solved, at least temporarily.

After kids sleep, check with hubby if he wants a coffee/dinner and if he is ready, ask him how he is doing .. so that he feels nice.

Please dont mind hubby's words ... he is just having a tough time.

This time also looks like a \" project\" for you! They need you more at this hour, and u need to be patient and thoughtful.

Once front facing problem is solved, u can think why kids are throwing tantrums ... and address the problem accordingly.

whatever u do ..
pls keep us posted on how it goes
your friends are worried for u :)
sahe PriyaPrabu replied. Hi supriya,

Tantrum is common in kids.Isn't it?
I don't have kids yet.But i think it's not too bad.
Since your hubby is busy in his projects why don't you call your parents or in laws or someone to help you till his project comes to an end.
Or if he can manage you can take the kids to your parent's home or to your inlaws and your hubby can come n take u after his project is over.

If these things doesn't work.You can give different things(since from different ages) to each of them and allow them to play.

Take them to park and give some good physical activities.So that at night they will not be too active for tantrums.

I will be a good friend to you if you like.But I don't think I can help you with so many suggestions.

And Supriya you have posted an answer to my post.Thank you so much.