Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hello All,
I have been married for 8 yrs and I have two boys. From the day one my husband is a \";MAMA's Boy\";. In his blood only his mom, dad and his mom's kids are there.
We live in US since our marriage, but my in-laws torture me thru phone calls and thru my husband's mouth. Whatever my MIL wants to say to me, everything will come out thru my husband's mouth. Basically my husband is acting like my MIL and other IL's.
The problem is even though after several yrs of marriage, he still doesn't show any love, affection towards me or kids. Basically he is physically in US , mentally in India.
I was working before kids and I took a break for 4 yrs with my job and from past two yrs I am working. It is just 8hrs extra work at office along with my kids, home, their studies and activities. My husband has got instructions from his mom that he has to look after his health and take good rest. SO I am basically a good servent and a good Nanny to kids. Even though i do everything kids are not suppose to talk my language (kannada) and I am also not suppose to talk to my kids with my language. There are several problems like this .... which will be a mega serial like Kyun Ki....
The problem is now my husband started telling that when kids grow big, they would support mom hence he wants to save his money for his own safty, where as all my salary goes to the joint account and I end up with nothing. Even if i have to buy anything for me or kids, then it will become a big issue.
Where as, he has a very big heart to give everything to his mom and his mom's kids.
This is really depressing me.
Because of these issues from the day one, i have developed health problems like thyroid, disc hernia and both knee ware and tear.
I feel very weak and my bone pains so much.
Just wanted to share my feelings and make my heart lighted.... hi replied. hello klm


it is ok dear. leave it. remove those negative feelings from your mind. as sweety said you have great kids, GREAT JOB and YES YOU ARE FAR AWAY FROM YOUR INLAWS. take a lot of advantage of this situation. make your kids successful, try to save some money for yourself . talk to your parents. be happy. if you can make some good friends. pray. really it will give you relief. stop thinking of husband and all. live your life with kids. let him do as he wishes. read good books. inspirational books. cook delicious simple things for kids. dress them beautifully. dress yourself nicely. take care of yourself .your lfe is very important. a husband cnnot shatter that life. now start. eat healthy fruits veggies.take some time during weekends for walking or some good excercse. makeyourself and your kids happy. sometimes, you can even change your husband without talking anything. try it. ok. PryiaPrabu replied. Don't worry Klm,

Don't feel bad.
It hurts i know.But still try to stay calm.

You have kids,so concentrate on them very much.Try to teach 'em memory techniques and all stuff.Spend lot.... of time with ur kids.Eventually you and your kids will be having great time.

Enjoy yourselves(Be cheerfull and laughing all the time).Your husband will then realise that he has his lovely family here and will try and join you.Then you make him understand that he is the head of the family and he is in the age of taking decisions(not his mom).

Pray a lot to God.Atleast once in a day tell God abt what all you think in your mind.

This is very important.Take Care of your Health.Only till you are strong enough you can concentrate on your kids.Don't stress yourself too much in the name of household works.If you feel pain or something just laydown and take rest.Tell ur kids that you are not feeling well and so you are taking rest and ask them to learn their lessons or do something interesting.

If he is going to give so much money to his parents then y worry you too join in the list and ask for this,that,vaccation and all that.He would realize he is in short of money for everyone and may be (not sure) reduces the amount he gives to ur in ILs.

Be Cheerfull.Don't worry.

Sweety replied. Reading ur story i felt very bad.
Don't worry.
Vn husband does not understand our feelings it really hurts a lot.

I also have so many problems in life now.But vn I started thinking of positive things in my life My heart is now very light.

U have lots of things to b happy of

* U have a good job.
* U have wonderful kids.
* U r far away from ur in-laws.If u r near them it will b far more worse know.

Think of these positve things u r heart will become light.