Relationships  Discussion Forum

HI everyone, I need anyones honest opinion, regarding my feeling.when I got married, I paid lots(in lakhs) of dowry, (I know it's wrong, but it's very common in our custom, & my parents forced me, I didn't have any other way to confront them).& my in-laws spend every penny of it on building new house for them & also my bil took some part of it.but my in-laws are not well to do.since my husband is earning good, he has to send money for their expenses.& also my married sil(with kids) stays with my in-laws .sometimes when they ask money I feel like they are trying to grab money from us, & also I get feeling my in-laws are giving money to my sil.and my mil & sil's behavior towards me is not good(jealous). that makes me more anger,& suspicious.I know it is our duty to look after our in-laws but, same time i feel like our hardworking money should not be wasted for wrong purposs.my husband tells it is his money & he is earning he can give it to anyone he wants.what should I do?. srilu replied. HI Anusha,

I saw your posted message,as u mentioned in your message saying that its our duty to look after inlaws i accept for that.But that does not mean giving all our money to them,we should look after ourselves also.You are helping them as they need money,but if u need money will they help u.Think about that,if they are good people and if they are in a condition to help u,then they will help or else it will be a very big problem.That is the reason what you should do is,if your husband listens to u,you tell him to keep half, if not 30% of his salary on your name and tell him to spend the remaning salary for house hold expenses and for their parents.If you save money from nowonwards then there will be no problem for u and your kids in future.
Talk with your husband politely and tell him everything,but dont argue with him.

ok then bye,
God bless u,
srilu.