Planning a Baby  Discussion Forum

Hi friends..
I have been more of a reader in this group with few mails here and there...but i wish to share somethings today..
Me,my brother and both my cousins we all got married in the same month...and everybody was talking around that the house is soon gonna be full of babies...
and that is what happened my brother and my cousin's wife got pregnant ...except me ....but thought that god shall also bless me soon..
i attended all their baby shower ceremony with a smile on my face without letting even a single soul inside the room know that even i want to be among them...or deep down even i want to have a baby..but again felt that god will watch me and send me my baby...
they all gave birth to one of the mostbeautiful babies in the world...i attended all their naming ceremony's...watching my brothers holding their babies in their hand..and feeling that even god would pay any cost to take such an experience ...
i was smiling all the way trying to hide my tears to the max...that when would have his eyes on me .....
then i was pregnant...felt that god has finally put his eyes on me ...forgot everything ..me and husband were in the 7th world...but that dod not last long and i had a missed abortion...everything was again back as usual ...maybe worse...
it has been three months after my miscarriage...but there is not one day i do not remember my day of D&C..not because that was the day i lost my baby...but becasue i remember my dear husband' face all the time who had his his tears deep down so that he could wipe mine.. i remember my mother pretending to be strong trying to give me strenght but whoherself needed strenth,,,i remember my father's helpless face...who felt who could do anything for his daughter...i remember the entire hospital staff where i had my D&C assuring me that i shall soon have a baby ....
and so i am still pretending to have faith on god...beacuse i do not want to see all this dear people helpless again and so i am trying to strong for them..caused i have been blessed by the best husband and parents..
i do not know where i am getting strenth frm ..maybe seeing those people who are more sad then me ...

sorry for the long mail...but just wanted to share this...
thanks and regards..
reshma
karish replied. hello dear,

am in tears reading ur msg. also God mite b in the same state as us. Dont worry dear, all things will fall on its place. HE has brought us to it and he will see us thru it, for sure!!!

We are all there to giv u full support!!

All the best and loads of baby dust on o n all of us!!!

love

karishma S M replied. Don't worry dear ,everything is going to be fine.

You will surely have a baby soon.It must be really hard but you will get through it.

Have faith,and trust in God.

Why don't you and your husband go on a trip to some nice hill resort it might help you take off your mind a little from this sad phase.

All the best.

simba replied. Hi Reshma,
I completely understand what you are going through. After 2 chemical pregnancies last year and 1 recent miscarriage in March this year at 10 weeks after seeing a heart beat I know the pain. It just never ends. I am trying to focus on other things to keep my head occupied. Due to the D&C we cannot TTC for 3 months. So I am giving myself this time to lose weight, get healthy and be fit for any future successfull pregnancy. I am also going to see a RE soon to get me tested completely.
Focus on other things in life. Take a vacation with your husband. I have even avoided all freinds that are pregnant or that have kids and only want to talk about kids. Don't get me wrong. I am very happy for them , but I don't thing I can deal with their pregnancy talk or kiddie talk right now. Its fine to do that if helps you deal with your feelings better.
Take a break for all this tension and desperation. Trust me it helps.
I know even my husband did not shed a tear this time around. He was so strong. I on the other hand am in tears every single day ....
So Reshma, you will get pregnant soon and have a beautiful baby. have faith. God has something great stored for you.
Take care,
Simba

hopingfortejas replied. hey,

my heart goes out to you .....

i can say only one thing ..dont lose hope .... when we hold our babies in our hands we will value it much more because of all the pain we have undergone ...

God is just taking more time in giving us our babies because he is working very hard on them :) :)

-P kshama replied. I truly understand what u'r going through. I know u r strong now. U have conceived once, so i don't have any doubt and u will surely conceieve soon.
Just be patient and enjoy rest of the life

luv
kshama
Sadasivan Suja replied. Hi Reshma,

Not to worry to much, Go for second honeymoon with your husband and Have Faith in GOD. He will fullfill your wish. Take care... :)

Suja Sadasivan