Relationships  Discussion Forum

i have a situation for which i can't seek suggestions openly so posting it here, please try to help me. I am a housewife, 29 years old living in a joint family with my husband's parents and his 2 younger brothers aged 20 and 23 and my small daughter. We are quite a happy and fun loving family. My problem started with some observations by one of my friend from my society. She mentioned to me that my husband's younger brother try to touch me excessively and in appropriate areas. Now before anyone jumps to any conclusion let me explain things a bit, I dress in sarees at home due to conservative family and with saree a bit of stomach and back is visible, now my husband's brothers sometimes puts an arm around my waist or on my back while talking to me or they'll tease me or tickle me or simply touch my waist. I am quite ok with it as i consider them as my own brother and believe there are no bad intentions behind it. All this casual activities happen in front of family members and I have seen them doing the same with my mother in law as well. When my friend told me about this I told her the same to not worry about this but she said that such situation might become bigger problems later on. Another incident happened during the holi festival, when one aunt of my husband also came, so all the ladies and gents were colored and my friend saw from her house my brother in laws coloring me by putting their hands on my back, neck and stomach and she again raised the topic, however since i was there i knew all ladies were colored like that only, which is also quite common. Off late i have started to think is it really something wrong what i am doing, or on the pretext of being casual some advantage is being taken of me. Has anyone else has been in a similar situation, please advice. Pooja replied. You can start doing the same. Start tickling your brother n laws, start holding their back, lets c what your hubby says about this. You'll get something to discuss on. Go ahead on what your heart says. Ajay replied. Hi, Make it a point that you discuss the same with your hubby. If he understands you then he'll defntly help you out. Donot just act by listening to your aunt or other. Think by yourself. Agarwal replied. Hi,

Just listen to what your heart says. If you think problem is serious then start speaking to some one whom you can trust the most. Stop Thinking and start acting upon it. Believe in yourself. Prabhi replied. Hi Sneha, i would say its your life and you should think about things and situations and take necessary decision in your life. dont allow others to take over your life or else you cannot enjoy it. Niati replied. I would suggest that you should not listen to your friends too much and then think about it. If you think there is nothing wrong then just tell them to stay out of the matter as it is your family matter. NN replied. I think you should not overthink about it and as outsiders it is their nature to talk about things even if it not as they think it is. If you yourself don't think that something is weird then you should ignore what people say. Manu replied. Hello Sneha,
I do not know why do in laws touch their babi yaar it is not all done since olden days they will be talking very freely but they will never cross their limits also.I wish you must be careful from him and do not create any problems also. Nikki replied. Hello Sneha Agarwal,
According to my knowledge it is nothing wrong some people will free, but as woman we can know how the people will look at us and we can judge the people by their look,touches and even by their talks also but any how be careful. shamika replied. first of all we are women and we have sixth sense about if someone touching or watching us with bad intention. when your brother in law touches you do you fee that there is some bad intention in their touch? if you don't then there may not be any bad intention. and when there are things which are not there before and somebody come and told this that it is like this way and that way by their perception it really occur a problem which is originally not their. when you constantly keep saying you are mad then you really will started to feel you are mad. after all it is psychology.