Relationships  Discussion Forum

I m married since 2 years with 4 mths baby.I live in joint family in very small flats in south mumbai.I stay with my MIL n BIL My hubby n my baby.Mine was love mariage I kno my hubby since 8 yrs,v hav built a very strong understandin.
Since day one we all sleep in 1 room at nite.N v r hardly get chance to make out as v dont find comfortable to do so.There is a little place upstair but they dont want sleep their,well i hav a small baby so neither i can climb upstair every nite.
V both r working nearby this house n i want my MIL to take care of my baby,becoz of these v r not planning to shift.V try to give a word regarding this but my mil is ignoring this some how.V hav a owned house in suburb but it is too far from my working place,earlier we use too go in holidays but that chances also gone as my baby is small travelling is very far.
V r happy in all means but our sexually life in almost stop.My in-laws r good but jus becoz of these i get very upset on them.I dont how long these is going to happen.
If any suggestion ,pls
help me

thanks Namita replied. Swathi suggested you to shift upstairs ... bt i think i understood, if you mean the same as it is in chawl then yes it is difficult for you ... bt are you born n brought up in the same situation, if yes, then it should not be becoz most of the chawls have such small room upstairs .. so you shud adjust to it .. i undrstnd ur babay is small n u might be scared to take her up as the stairs are also not so supportive from sides ... bt learn to do it .. ask ur husband to take ur baby upstairs in night otherwise in day time its ok

the best option is to shift to ur own house ... if ur IL' s are good then the best will be to shift along with everyone, including BIL if he wants ... privacy is indeed needed bt if IL' s are really understanding and good then better to stay along with them in a big house .. or be firm and take ur husband in confidence and then inform your IL' s abt ur shifting idea .. they might feel bad intitally but you can stay them every weekend ... like coming to their place on friday or saturday and leaving on monday ... south mumbai and suburbs are not so far dear ... people travel from harbour to south mumbai then what is the prob. in the single line journey swathi replied. hai aarthi,
why is this happening like this.was it like this in the initial stages of marriage?man dont be offended but this is disgusting.wat abt bil.i assume he is unmarried,so is it gonna be same when he gets married also?yes u cant make out in a single room with bil and in-laws.why don' t u guys shift to upstairs room?or else ask ur mil n fil to move there.now baby is 4 months rite.i think now u can handle by urself.i have 3 months baby whom iam handling alone.ask bil to move to living room or something.it isnt a good idea to keep an unmarried man in couples room.he staying with ils,no problem.
now when the family gets bigger is it gonna be same.ur child grows up and its important 4u to have space.or else why cant u guys shift job to place nearer to ur suburb home.why is ur mil ignoring u guys comments for room shifting.cant she understand?
u guys are stil newly married (2yrs isnt long).u have a full life ahead of you.why are u spoling it.be bold and speak to ur hubby abt this .also what is the problem of u guys sleeping in upper room.to gain something u have to do something.old parents may find it hard to go upstairs everynite.what abt u guys?try to do that.having a baby is not big issue to move to upper room.if nuthing works just change ur home .get ur mom/someone else to look after baby.by age of one i think u can put her in creche .soem parents do it earlier also, no harm in sending baby to nice creche.myself iam sending the same to creche frm her next month.
iam not saying sex is everything in life,but it is important.now u guys maybe busy with baby and all .ofcoz sex life is in back seat.but later this leads to big problem in ur happily married life .