Relationships  Discussion Forum

Name: Frustrated One

Hi all,

I need your suggestion frankly about a situation I am facing.We r married for 6 yrs now and we live abroad.My husband is very caring and all but recently I see lot of change in his behavior.I have some problems with my in-laws. Thye dont like me. My husband stayed at diff city for his job for some months. He used tot alk with his parents and SIS alone. His SIS don' t like me or my parents. She always interferes with matters between my parents and in-laws. My husband told that when talked with my SIL she once told all bad things abput my parents that they r not taking good care of my daughter etc.

We gave some x lakhs amount for my sisters marriage. At that time my father told my husband that he will return whatever money we ask them to return. I wanted them to return 1 lakhs and my husband wants them to return 1.5 lakhs.
Since one yr I am saying to my husband that we willa sk only 1 lakh. My father is retired now and they r coming for my secodn baby delivary. My first daughter is staying at my parents house. We didn' t sent any money for my daughters stay since my parents opposed that many times. I wanted to bring some clothes for me and my daughter so I told my parents to purchase that and also We made her some gold chain. the total cost for all these was around 30,000
My parents also has travel expenses like buying luggage sets for 3 people, my shopping, previous shopping etc.
Also they r bringing gold bangles, chain ,luggage sets, clothes for all of our family which costs them nearly 30,000 since gold is not cheap now a days. Now what my husband is saying is let them bare all those expenses and tell them to give me 1 lakh rupees.
I tried very hard to convence him that we will take extra expenses out of those 1 lakh and will tell my parents to return that remaining money.

Whenever we had this kind of situation we both used to discuss very openly and to come to an understanding.
Based on this we had big fight yesterday and he is not ready to discuss anything. He is saying that he told his deceission
and its upto me whether to follow his deceission or not. He alos told that If I won' t follow his decisiion
then he won' t ask or touch the money my parents will give.

I am in a position that I don' t know what to do.
Previously he used to treat my parents wiht good respect but recently his attitude is chaging towards them. My IL' s nd SIL didn' t liked that we gave that much money to my sis marriage. They always say that parents should always give their daughter but they should not accept or expect anything from there daughter. They r kind of stero type people.

Please tell me what' s your openion on this regard? who is right me or my husband? how to convence my husband...

One more thing I used to work at the time when we gave money to our parents. Just 20 days ago I have resigned from my job b' coz I had to move to where my husband works.

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