Hi ,

I am new member , im 16 weeks pregnant and i have a 2 year old boy . Last time for my son i went back to my country to deliver him , but this time im in USA , i dnt have any relatives or friends that can take care of my son during the labor time . Im kinda worried how am i gng to manage both this time , always crying thinking abt this . I wanted to ask my mom to come to US , but i dint get a good response from hubby , so i stopped talking abt the matter . My question is can i keep my son with me after i gave birth ( can i ask the dr abt this ) . Pls advice .

Regards ,

Gayathri Sheetal replied. Hi,

The first time, i was all by myself. MY mil was here only for the first 15 days, but i m glad she went coz its more of a mental torture if she is around. I managed just fine. See, its important to take care of your meals. If you can find someone who can make your meals or give u tiffin, you' ll be alrite.

This is my second time. My mom didn' t get the visa last time, we are going to try again, but i need to be prepared. I have two major things in mind:
1. Get someone to cook for me. Either someone who can come home and cook, or who can deliver. (my husband travels for work, he is here only on weekends).
2. I keep my 2 and 1/2 year old girl at a home-based daycare as of now for 3 hours every day. When the baby comes, i' ll leave her for like 6 hours. That' ll give me a break from her. She sleeps with me rite now, so i m getting her a toddler bed and i need to start training her to sleep in her own bed, even if its in my room.

It' ll be difficult to manage two, but we must not panic. Everything falls into place. It' ll be hard but we always manage, don' t we. vidhi replied. hi gayatri ,
welcome to the club ...i m also having the same problem as your' s. i live in latin america ...i can neither call my mom in law nor my mom ...even if i think of my mom in law its ok b' coz i feel atleast this time their must be some one to help ..i have seen my friends managing alone my god its terible ..you become emotionally sick n physically tired ..but wht to do cant help it so jst be happy now n dont cry ..jst think abt how you can handle alone ...i tell you even friends r not worth so much ..no body helps more than 3-5 days so be prepared ..surf abt things how to handle abay alone ...wht things you can prepare in advance that dont get spoiled in fridge so atleast will be handy for ur hubby to eat ..definately he will try to manage with you ..keep urself strong n confident ....n abt ur son i think you r problem can be understood by friends who have kids ...
take care n dont cry vidhi replied. hi gayatri ,
welcome to the club ...i m also having the same problem as your' s. i live in latin america ...i can neither call my mom in law nor my mom ...even if i think of my mom in law its ok b' coz i feel atleast this time their must be some one to help ..i have seen my friends managing alone my god its terible ..you become emotionally sick n physically tired ..but wht to do cant help it so jst be happy now n dont cry ..jst think abt how you can handle alone ...i tell you even friends r not worth so much ..no body helps more than 3-5 days so be prepared ..surf abt things how to handle abay alone ...wht things you can prepare in advance that dont get spoiled in fridge so atleast will be handy for ur hubby to eat ..definately he will try to manage with you ..keep urself strong n confident ....n abt ur son i think you r problem can be understood by friends who have kids ...
take care n dont cry alolika replied. hi gayathri, firstly welcome to the club.
regarding ur problem, why dont u call ur mom-in-law instead if ur hubby has prob with ur mom?? its difficult to manage on ur own specially when its ur second baby. someone needs to be with your son. i dont think the hospital will allow ur son to stay back during night time. ur husband can stay with ur son at home during nights.
i suggest you can even ask ur husband' s colleagues or their families to look after ur son. im sure people do help in a situation like this.
anyways, dont panic. there is still time so maybe you can persuade ur husband by then to get ur mum. im sure everything will turn out fine. do not take tension n worry urself.
good luck..