Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi,
I am totally confused and worried about this issue which is eating up my brains.
I am married to my husband for almost 1.5 years now.My husband's elder brother lives with us.He is bachelor.
We live abroad.This brother never came to our wedding and the first time I saw him was here.
My husband and his family( My inlaws)have told me he hates women marriage etc., does not want to get married.
On the very first day my husband introduced him I did not feel comfortable(until today) at the way he looked at me.He is a very very creepy devil. personification of evil..
Unnecessarily he tried to touch my hand when I hand him something.feel like slapping him real hard on his face.........

He sometimes pretend to sleep on our couch but he was never asleep.I used to think he is really sleeping but once when my husband just moved out of the living room for a second he opens his eyes and smile at me.
He gives me the dirtiest looks ever possible.He is a pig.

While all of us are watching TV I have noticed him look at me without my husband's knowledge.
I try my best to avoid being at home alone with this fellow.
But 2 months back it so happened that I came back home to find this fellow alone at home.
Until my husband got home I locked myself inside our room and was scared to death.He used to not even come anywhere near our room when my husband is at home.but that day was standing at the doorway calling me,asking for something...Then getting no response he left the place.
I have started working and unfortunatley the place where this person works is very close to mine.I want to cry as I write this.I feel all the hell has broken loose for me.
One day during work he comes over to my office to see his friend(a good friend of
my collegue).I never went to greet him ..just waiting for hime to leave But that pig has all the courage to come to my desk and say in such a low voice that I look s - - y and he wants to hug me tight (+ one more thing I feel ashamed to
write)....I felt so weak at my knees giddy the whole day and scared and crying.. Cannot even go home sooner because of the fear this person at home..
That evening I wanted to tell my husband about everything and just cry..But did not get the courage to do it...I am not sure
how he will take it.He loves me deeply I know for sure but I dont know how to stop this.
Even when Iam at office I spend my day with that fear of seeing him
Most unbelievable thing is how he behaves when my husband is around..he will act so decent and he will not even look at my face.
I don't know how to bring this up to my husband's notice and what is the solution. he has too much respect for his brother and if I tell him about this I have no idea how he will react.'
My husband thinks that I have become very moody nowadays but he was always good to me.no matter what.He is the same as we were when we got married.Even if I give him a suggestion about me going back to India for a short visit makes him sad.
I don't want to break this good person's heart.

But this issue is exhausting my physical and mental energy since I have to see this devil everyday I am worried what he might do the next day and also about my husband what will happen if he comes to know this.
S M replied. Dear girl!!!!!

First and foremost plzzzzzz try to tell your husband as soon as possible.

Next as u have said that u are in U.S.A

You know what you have a very good advantage,tell that jerk of your BIL that the next time he does that u will have to call 911,for assault and misbehaviour.
Look him straight in the eye without any fear ,put all your anger look terrifying and tell him that.But before doing this You really need to approach your husband ASAP.

More so tell him that one of your friends heard him say , when he had come to your workplace and she has offered help so there is somebody who knows this and you can prove it to your husband.If he wants to save his face ask him to consider all these consequences.

One more thing next time you go shopping go to the electronics section and buy a small tape recorder ,If he comes to say any stupid stuff record it,like for instance you see him coming to your office have it in your reach at all times ,keep it ready.
I don't know Just sooo concerned about your situation.


Or the next time he looks at you when your husband is there ,ask him literally what he wants????Is there some problem.

He will be taken aback.

It might be a fuel to the beginning of many things.

This is not about breaking your family,but about protecting yourself.I completely agree with Priya.


I am praying for you dear.

Take care. GoodMorning replied. I found you!sweet Angel.
Dont write here.wont get no solution.more trouble.Keep it to family.
You know the solution ( with \";least damage\"; to everyone.)
you are a gift to mankind.& I am a man.
What are you made of.would like to taste-test in detail.
we sleep separated by one wall.My body aches for you I am hurt all over.
These morons have not seen what I have seen.
I am human until now.Dont make me demon.
Kisses from top until the bottom everywhere.
My heart races when I think about this (the kisses) Pallavi replied. hi dear, felt really bad after reading ur msg but i think u shud handle this very smartly. I know if u tell this to ur husband without any proof..he won't take it seriously.so what I feel...u should record your conversation with your brother in law ....ofcourse do it secretly and show it to your husband.

try to get such opportunity when u r alone with ur brother in law...record the conversation either in ur mobile or tape.

I am sure u'll get such opportunity.

all the best!!!!!
don't worry
diya replied. hello dear......i m reaaly feeling bad after reding such dirty acts of that person....i have a similar experience bt not as much intense as urs....i agree with priya that u should tell ur husband abt it....and also S is rite..u should show this msg on net to ur husband...and he will surley understand ur problem.plz do it as soon as possible...u said that u both hav a good relationship...so i m sure he will help u...my prayers r with u..take care n do it soon...and pl let us know....bye Q replied. Can u not offer some sex to your lonely brother-in-law? Why are you so prudish. It will take only a few minutes of your time. S replied. Hi friend,I think you should show him what you have written here. Once after you gently speak with him show him this forum.You have mentioned everything frankly here and also it seems that you really care for his family.
I am sure he will understand and support you,he is your husband after all.
Take care,
S friend replied. Hello there,
I have a feeling that person has all intentions to 'lay you' down oneday.As a man I can tell you this.
I think he is trying to 'have you' no matter.Oneday or the other he is going to force himself and get what he wanted.
So Act fast.Tell your husband and put an end to this.
He probably knows about you very well and thinks you are scared ,shy and will never tell anything to anybody.let me tell you that is not good.
All I can say is ACT FAST. SAVE YOURSELVES.
Good luck
AGG replied. Priya is very right...just tell ur husband about this at the earliest possible... This man seems to be very sly and seems prepared. I m sure he has calculated every move that u might possibly make and is already ready with an action. Just do the unexpected. Hint your husband that the reason for u being moody is his brother..when ur husband asks further about it..just tell everything slowly and one by one...see how ur husband reacts...If he doesnt agree ask him to believe u and ask him to observe his brother instead of questioning him..because this guy surely has an answer to any questions asked by ur husband...Tell ur husband to observe him and then decide what has to be done further to make u live at peace... priya replied. I think you should tell ur husband abt this before its too late ... If you dont tell it now and ur hubby comes to know abt it by himself he might accuse you of trying to hide. I guess his brother is taking advantage of the fact that you will never tell ur husband...

Find out a right opportunity and tell ur hubby. If not everything just hint him that his brother looks at you very inappropriately and that makes you very uncomfortable. You can tell this in short with one or two instances...
Check out his reaction !!!
I am sure he will take necessary measures ...like asking him to move out !

Take Care
Priya