Joint Family:How do you spend time with your child?
2007-07-22
Name: Saheli
How do you working/non-working mothers spend time with your children?
I am trying to collect and share facts so that other mother can read and pick from it.
I am currently away from my family and had some free time in my hand. Also saw not much movement on this board. So thought may be pick up some constructive topic which can help everybody.
Share your tips, tricks, facts, ideas, thoughts. What do you mothers do ... read a book, play some game? How do you make sure its a learn and fun time? I am interested in knowing all this as I have been only reading and implementing till now. Hearing practical experiences will surely help me and other mothers.
Howdy?
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How do you working/non-working mothers spend time with your children?
I am trying to collect and share facts so that other mother can read and pick from it.
I am currently away from my family and had some free time in my hand. Also saw not much movement on this board. So thought may be pick up some constructive topic which can help everybody.
Share your tips, tricks, facts, ideas, thoughts. What do you mothers do ... read a book, play some game? How do you make sure its a learn and fun time? I am interested in knowing all this as I have been only reading and implementing till now. Hearing practical experiences will surely help me and other mothers.
Howdy?
Sandhya replied. Hi everyone
I am the mother of a 3 year old boy (expecting my second one in a month' s time).I am a SAHM.My day starts at 5.15 a.m.Hubby is dropped off at work by me at 7.30 a.m.My son is at the day care from 9.00-3.00 p.m.When he is gone, I finish off the house work and spend some time for myself ( reading etc.)Once he is back,I make it a point to talk to him and play with him.We go for walking/ cycling, play in the park, have playdates with his friends etc.He is being taught to take care of his things and tidy up once he is done playing.Also, he loves to help me in some chores like taking the dishes out of the dishwasher, hanging wet clothes on the rack outside.I try to teach him things by actually doing them and involving him in those activities.I think, I will have more opportunities to do that when his sibling arrives.He is in bed by 9.00 p.m., something which I have stuck to for a very long time.
Enjoyed reading everyone' s posts.
Sandhya
Saheli replied. I am glad you liked this topic and I am sure those who have contributed and read the posts have benefitted from them.
Please post your thoughts if you have any, till 26th. After which I am thinking of posting some new topic.
I feel this idea of putting up a constructive topic is really helpful and we can continue the trend. I hope you agree to me.
Thanks all who have pitched in! Keep writing!!
raj replied. Well,what else can I share,
1.We parents make it a point to hug our kids good morning and good night every single day.Even during my hubby' s office tours,this is kept up(over phone).
2.We laugh together a lot.Jokes, pranks,mock fights et al.
3.We insist on saying daily prayers,we tell them mythological and moral stories too during story time.
4.We ahve managed to get both kids into reading habit by doing it ourselves,sunday morning you' d typically find all of us in the darwing room huddled over different sections of newspaper,or other books.
All this makes it sound as though I have an ideal family,far from it,we have our share of problems too.
Can anybody here suggest on
1.How to reduce TV time for my kids?
2.How to make them socially better behaved and more well mannered wheen guests come over etc?
Thanx
Raj
Saheli replied. Here' s what i am taking away from your posts:
1 - voilin classes twice a week. My family was telling me that its too early and too much to start a music/such a class. Twice/week wont be much. Kid can do that. Thanks for the idea.
2- sparing some time to pick kid and drop home is a great idea and can be used to connect with kid.
3 - making fav snack on rotation - wow. This is always a question -what to cook! Hmmmph, so u r PG in nutrition. Why dint u tell us before? I ll end all my nutrition Qs your way now!
Manee - you got your MIL do pranayaam and yoga. Kudos! Are you also teaching same to your child? Its so good that its not too early!
megha replied. This is a nice topic and also to get some new tips and trick !!
Well, my son is only a 14 months old. My day starts at 6.30(i am up and ready) when my hubby leaves for office.
Then i do some preparations for breakfast and lunch for my baby. Make my tea and have it while watching morning news and also do check my emails. Around 7.30 or 8, my son wakes up. I feed him b' fast then play for a while then its bath time. Recently i hv started making him play in different rooms at diff times of day while i do the usual cleaning, tidying up that room. For this i have a set of toys in each room. Morning, I make up the beds while my son plays with his toys. I talk to him or sing a rhyme. Then prepare lunch. Around 11, i usually take him to a library for storytime/booktime which he enjoys as there are other kids of his age. Other days we just set out to the market. By lunch time, we are home. Lunch time is also fun as i feed him with one spoon. and i give him another spoon to play with. sometimes he will feed me with that spoon, sometimes he feeds himself a bite or 2. After lunch, usually we play some games or watch TV or enact some poems. He loves turning the pages of books. So i show him all the pictures in the baby books and point to it and say it aloud. Any item around you can be the most wonderful toy for your baby. Once tired, he sleeps straight for 3 hrs in the a' noon. and that is all my time :). I catch with friends on the phone/email. Read interesting articles on the net.may be do some online shopping as well. One hour before his waking time, i start preparing dinner. and some snakcs to eat when he is up.
Once he wakes, he will hv his snacks. then in another room, we play..if i am putting the clothes to dry i will tell him to pass me one by one which he loves. When i am in the kitchen, i let him play with pots and pans and spoons. Anything new makes them so delighted. I let him sit on a high chair and feed himself some titbits. then i feed him his dinner.when hubby comes, i get a break..we both hv dinner. then hubby takes him out daily and sit in the garden from where he loves watching cars and planes. while i do the washing and cleaning in the kitchen. then its bed time.
My top tips to keep young babies busy are - give them safe containers with lids to play. they love removing it and putting it back. show them how to line up the lids, they will enjoy doing that.
lay before them a couple of big, bright books with big pictures.
ofcourse, each baby is different and has differnt interests.
I was working earlier but am at home atleast until my child is 2. and i enjoy being with him every moment. be the first one to see when he does something new :)
raj replied. Hi all,
I am a sty at home mom with 2 kids aged 9 and 4 1/2.
Well,how time does fly through the day!I chose to stay at home so that I can do full justice to my kids,but even then I do end up feeling guilty several times about not attending to their needs enough.
Weekday mornings are spent in hustling the kids and the bigger kid(hubby!)to school and work.I drop my daughter while hubby drops son instead of using school transport.WE use those valuable minutes to crack jokes sing silly songs all along the way and in general make them laugh and keep them in good spirits for the day ahead.
Daughter is picked up again at 1.30p.m.,and its' time for recounting all that happened.She is a very fussy eater at home though she does eat her snack happily at school,so I' m thinking that I should send her lunch to school too and arrange with her teacher to pick her up at 2 p.m or so.(Her Montessori playschool has daycare too).
Son comes home by school van by 3p.m.By then daughter is snoozing and I am able to spend some very good quality time with him abt his school,studies,violin practise,games,etc.But all that goes haywire when the younger one decides not to have anap and then she keeps butting in and makes a huge nuisance of herself!!!
Evenings are spent in kids playing with other kids from same building,twice a week violin classes too,and some school related shopping at times(Mummy! madam has asked for this chart/glossy paper/color sheets/pictures,right away).After 7,its wash up and prayer time,then dinner,stories(not everyday),pillow fights,threats-brush you teeth right away!,no more TV,go to bed just now,screams,did you go to the loo?,,blah blah until I sleep out of exhaustion,and my daughter sneaks out after ensuring that I am fast asleep!!!! She then manages to wrangle an extra story from her pet dad,and only then sleeps!!!
Weekends are a different medley altogether.Mayhem rules,nothing gets done on time,and I am so relieved when it is Monday once again.
I forgot to mention making each one' s favourite snack on rotation all the while listening to taalis from ILs that all this is junk snacks,( in our times we ate ---).They usually forget that I am a PG in Nutrition and they feel compelled to share and lacture on good food and good living several times.
' My daughter has already decided that on growing up she wants to join bharatnatyam and kungfu classes(!!!),so I need to quickly do my home work on that too,We want son to do badminton or tennis too,lets see.He wants to learn swimming(no heated pools nearby).
Guys I too would love to hear about how all of you go about your routines with kids,we could share concerns,joys achievements,failures too.
Raj
Manee replied. Hi Saheli,
You have started very nice topic.Even i am interested to know this. I am sharing my daily routine.I am also a working mom and lucky enough to have a nice MIL to take care of my kid so i have peace of mind. My son has started to go to nursery. His school time is 8.00. So i wake up at 6.00. Get him ready,prepare his b' fast(i get help in this by MIl many times). My husband drops him in school and go to office. My get ready for office and come to office by 8.45(I used to come by 9.30 before he started this school).At 10.40 i got to his school to pick him up and drops him at home and come back to offce it takes me 30-40 minutes doing this( It' s a pleasure to pick ur kid from school..I have talked to every body at office about taking a break of half an hour and adjusting that time by coming to office early). I pick my lunch when i drop him at home(earlier i used to go to home for lunch..now also if i can manage..i mean work is less then i go). I plan to reach home by 7.00 p.m with +/- 30 minutes. When at home sometime i take him to cycling downstairs. We play ..talk about the day..Read story or watch some tv togather..do colouring..and then again dinner routine..I plan to put him to sleep by 10.00 p.m so that he can wake up 6.30 in the morning.
I want to thank you for being an active member of this forum. I really admire your view and replies here. Keep it up..
2007-07-24
#1
Name: Sandhya Subject: Play/ work time
Hi everyone
I am the mother of a 3 year old boy (expecting my second one in a month' s time).I am a SAHM.My day starts at 5.15 a.m.Hubby is dropped off at work by me at 7.30 a.m.My son is at the day care from 9.00-3.00 p.m.When he is gone, I finish off the house work and spend some time for myself ( reading etc.)Once he is back,I make it a point to talk to him and play with him.We go for walking/ cycling, play in the park, have playdates with his friends etc.He is being taught to take care of his things and tidy up once he is done playing.Also, he loves to help me in some chores like taking the dishes out of the dishwasher, hanging wet clothes on the rack outside.I try to teach him things by actually doing them and involving him in those activities.I think, I will have more opportunities to do that when his sibling arrives.He is in bed by 9.00 p.m., something which I have stuck to for a very long time.
Enjoyed reading everyone' s posts.
Sandhya
2007-07-24
#2
Name: Saheli Subject: RE: FEEDBACK
I am glad you liked this topic and I am sure those who have contributed and read the posts have benefitted from them.
Please post your thoughts if you have any, till 26th. After which I am thinking of posting some new topic.
I feel this idea of putting up a constructive topic is really helpful and we can continue the trend. I hope you agree to me.
Thanks all who have pitched in! Keep writing!!
2007-07-24
#3
Name: raj Subject: what else?
Well,what else can I share,
1.We parents make it a point to hug our kids good morning and good night every single day.Even during my hubby' s office tours,this is kept up(over phone).
2.We laugh together a lot.Jokes, pranks,mock fights et al.
3.We insist on saying daily prayers,we tell them mythological and moral stories too during story time.
4.We ahve managed to get both kids into reading habit by doing it ourselves,sunday morning you' d typically find all of us in the darwing room huddled over different sections of newspaper,or other books.
All this makes it sound as though I have an ideal family,far from it,we have our share of problems too.
Can anybody here suggest on
1.How to reduce TV time for my kids?
2.How to make them socially better behaved and more well mannered wheen guests come over etc?
Thanx
Raj
2007-07-24
#4
Name: Saheli Subject: re: raj - TV and guests
TV -
Why and when and how much do your kids watch TV? Track that trend.
To reduce their viewership, you will first need to reduce yours. Then, you can lock the kids´ channels before those times when you know they would want to watch but you dont want them to. Third is discipline. Tell the kids that these are the times when you are allowed to watch, and maintain it. At times, when we feel the kid has been watching for long and want him to quit, we just go and put off the TV. This may annoy the kid as his show may at the climax. Give him a warning, something like " please put it off after this program" , thus respecting his interest (and then tell him you did it, otherwise he will never know that mom respects him and so he needs to do that as well!).
There are times when we are busy in something and want to kids to be quiet and not bother us, and we allow them to watch TV. This is something we need to control and do it only when there is no alternative left. Habit of reading, playing fav games, ur getting kids run an errand, or helping mom or dad, may come handy at such times.
I have kept some CDs of good stories, mythological stories, mythological animated movies, in short - good stuff - and when I am caught in a sitation wherre I dont want them to bother me, I put on the CD on my laptop. Its rays is much less harmful (or i think, not harmful at all - not sure) than TV and I am sure kids are seeing good stuff.
For good manners and behaving when you have guests -
I think this comes when the parents exhibit it. Teach the child, and then show the child. Dont force, let him go if he doesnt wish them. Dont say a word. Later, give him examples from his fav cartoons or heroes eg spiderman or pokemon whatever, when he sees it on TV etc - " see he said good morning/he said thanks" . Dont compare with other children but praise other children if you happen to visit them and they wish you.
And if at all your child does that even once, praise him, tell to others (he should hear that), and gift him a little something to encourage.
Teach the kids how to behave when guests are their - and teach this separately - dont instruct them after guests arrive. Explain why, explain how a guest would feel. A 9 and 5 yr old kid is old enough to understand. Teach them rules, that if they want to play, they should go to their room. Be disciplined and strict about this and get your hubby´ s help to talk to them after the guests have gone and they have misbehaved.
Its not easy as it sounds. Even after trying all these, it took me good time to get my kid do it. Finally, he has learnt it! Thank God!
2007-07-23
#5
Name: Saheli Subject: re: Manee and Raj
Here' s what i am taking away from your posts:
1 - voilin classes twice a week. My family was telling me that its too early and too much to start a music/such a class. Twice/week wont be much. Kid can do that. Thanks for the idea.
2- sparing some time to pick kid and drop home is a great idea and can be used to connect with kid.
3 - making fav snack on rotation - wow. This is always a question -what to cook! Hmmmph, so u r PG in nutrition. Why dint u tell us before? I ll end all my nutrition Qs your way now!
Manee - you got your MIL do pranayaam and yoga. Kudos! Are you also teaching same to your child? Its so good that its not too early!
2007-07-23
#6
Name: megha Subject: Nice topic indeed
This is a nice topic and also to get some new tips and trick !!
Well, my son is only a 14 months old. My day starts at 6.30(i am up and ready) when my hubby leaves for office.
Then i do some preparations for breakfast and lunch for my baby. Make my tea and have it while watching morning news and also do check my emails. Around 7.30 or 8, my son wakes up. I feed him b' fast then play for a while then its bath time. Recently i hv started making him play in different rooms at diff times of day while i do the usual cleaning, tidying up that room. For this i have a set of toys in each room. Morning, I make up the beds while my son plays with his toys. I talk to him or sing a rhyme. Then prepare lunch. Around 11, i usually take him to a library for storytime/booktime which he enjoys as there are other kids of his age. Other days we just set out to the market. By lunch time, we are home. Lunch time is also fun as i feed him with one spoon. and i give him another spoon to play with. sometimes he will feed me with that spoon, sometimes he feeds himself a bite or 2. After lunch, usually we play some games or watch TV or enact some poems. He loves turning the pages of books. So i show him all the pictures in the baby books and point to it and say it aloud. Any item around you can be the most wonderful toy for your baby. Once tired, he sleeps straight for 3 hrs in the a' noon. and that is all my time :). I catch with friends on the phone/email. Read interesting articles on the net.may be do some online shopping as well. One hour before his waking time, i start preparing dinner. and some snakcs to eat when he is up.
Once he wakes, he will hv his snacks. then in another room, we play..if i am putting the clothes to dry i will tell him to pass me one by one which he loves. When i am in the kitchen, i let him play with pots and pans and spoons. Anything new makes them so delighted. I let him sit on a high chair and feed himself some titbits. then i feed him his dinner.when hubby comes, i get a break..we both hv dinner. then hubby takes him out daily and sit in the garden from where he loves watching cars and planes. while i do the washing and cleaning in the kitchen. then its bed time.
My top tips to keep young babies busy are - give them safe containers with lids to play. they love removing it and putting it back. show them how to line up the lids, they will enjoy doing that.
lay before them a couple of big, bright books with big pictures.
ofcourse, each baby is different and has differnt interests.
I was working earlier but am at home atleast until my child is 2. and i enjoy being with him every moment. be the first one to see when he does something new :)
2007-07-24
#7
Name: raj Subject: very sweet
Hi Megha,
Very sweet,I used to do that when kids were small too,even now I ask son to help me withcleaning glass panes in windows,vaccum cleaning beds all this he loves to do.Daughter typically loves to imitate me in whatever I or her granny does,it´ s truly fun to do chores with kids.
Raj
2007-07-23
#8
Name: Saheli Subject: lovely!
what a creative use of doinf housework and engaging the child as he leaarns and has fun too!
2007-07-23
#9
Name: raj Subject: Hi everyone
Hi all,
I am a sty at home mom with 2 kids aged 9 and 4 1/2.
Well,how time does fly through the day!I chose to stay at home so that I can do full justice to my kids,but even then I do end up feeling guilty several times about not attending to their needs enough.
Weekday mornings are spent in hustling the kids and the bigger kid(hubby!)to school and work.I drop my daughter while hubby drops son instead of using school transport.WE use those valuable minutes to crack jokes sing silly songs all along the way and in general make them laugh and keep them in good spirits for the day ahead.
Daughter is picked up again at 1.30p.m.,and its' time for recounting all that happened.She is a very fussy eater at home though she does eat her snack happily at school,so I' m thinking that I should send her lunch to school too and arrange with her teacher to pick her up at 2 p.m or so.(Her Montessori playschool has daycare too).
Son comes home by school van by 3p.m.By then daughter is snoozing and I am able to spend some very good quality time with him abt his school,studies,violin practise,games,etc.But all that goes haywire when the younger one decides not to have anap and then she keeps butting in and makes a huge nuisance of herself!!!
Evenings are spent in kids playing with other kids from same building,twice a week violin classes too,and some school related shopping at times(Mummy! madam has asked for this chart/glossy paper/color sheets/pictures,right away).After 7,its wash up and prayer time,then dinner,stories(not everyday),pillow fights,threats-brush you teeth right away!,no more TV,go to bed just now,screams,did you go to the loo?,,blah blah until I sleep out of exhaustion,and my daughter sneaks out after ensuring that I am fast asleep!!!! She then manages to wrangle an extra story from her pet dad,and only then sleeps!!!
Weekends are a different medley altogether.Mayhem rules,nothing gets done on time,and I am so relieved when it is Monday once again.
I forgot to mention making each one' s favourite snack on rotation all the while listening to taalis from ILs that all this is junk snacks,( in our times we ate ---).They usually forget that I am a PG in Nutrition and they feel compelled to share and lacture on good food and good living several times.
' My daughter has already decided that on growing up she wants to join bharatnatyam and kungfu classes(!!!),so I need to quickly do my home work on that too,We want son to do badminton or tennis too,lets see.He wants to learn swimming(no heated pools nearby).
Guys I too would love to hear about how all of you go about your routines with kids,we could share concerns,joys achievements,failures too.
Raj
2007-07-23
#10
Name: Manee Subject: Very Nice topic
Hi Saheli,
You have started very nice topic.Even i am interested to know this. I am sharing my daily routine.I am also a working mom and lucky enough to have a nice MIL to take care of my kid so i have peace of mind. My son has started to go to nursery. His school time is 8.00. So i wake up at 6.00. Get him ready,prepare his b' fast(i get help in this by MIl many times). My husband drops him in school and go to office. My get ready for office and come to office by 8.45(I used to come by 9.30 before he started this school).At 10.40 i got to his school to pick him up and drops him at home and come back to offce it takes me 30-40 minutes doing this( It' s a pleasure to pick ur kid from school..I have talked to every body at office about taking a break of half an hour and adjusting that time by coming to office early). I pick my lunch when i drop him at home(earlier i used to go to home for lunch..now also if i can manage..i mean work is less then i go). I plan to reach home by 7.00 p.m with +/- 30 minutes. When at home sometime i take him to cycling downstairs. We play ..talk about the day..Read story or watch some tv togather..do colouring..and then again dinner routine..I plan to put him to sleep by 10.00 p.m so that he can wake up 6.30 in the morning.
I want to thank you for being an active member of this forum. I really admire your view and replies here. Keep it up..
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Play/ work time
RE: FEEDBACK
what else?
Name: Saheli
re: raj - TV and guests
re: Manee and Raj
very sweet
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