Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hello sangini, i have read many of your suggestions and i appreciate that put in an effort to at least show some light to those in distress by their in-laws,that is the reasin iam requesting you to advice me too.I dont know where to start from but the jist is that my MIL is tremendously jealous of me.she has such an evil eye that if i see her face and go for some work it is bound to get spoiled first i thought i was superstitious but now iam realising taht she wants me to be nowhere she openly says TERA SATYANASH HO when i ask her what??? she would say ARRE NAHIN TERI SABZI KA SATANAASH HO as iam bored eating the same vegetable again and again.she would pass comments when i dress up or she would just say ke you are good for nothing while my elder daughterinlaw looks like a kashmiri i read the problem of this girl called chitrangada and i felt iam sailing in the same boat,needless to say it has affected me.i did a course in reiki and i put all fengshui items in my house to eliminate her negativity but it just not works if iam sweet to her she would take me for granted and start creating more problem.i want to be strong but her face haunts me now when i pass through her room i walk stealthily as a thief,if i go to a parlour she would say that look at your bhabhi she has natural beauty,she is so talented etc. etc.the sight of my MIL and this Bahu of hers gives me jitters i want to run off from all these but cant because my husband doesnt want to according to him let them spoil their karmas but dont spoil yours ,iam not as modest as he is firstly i have to face them,he says that there is no such thing called nazar but i have seen things happening any new work which i would do in the presence of my MIL is bound to fail.iam helpless.pl. help neel replied. hi tina.i am facing the same problem.previously i use to listen to her and do whatever she wants even dress up like her but when i realised that she is so partial to my derani sil i protested. now i am bad bahu but am free of all those cribbing. u have to bolding face her nahin to you will suffer.u will be demoralised. this is not the time to be good all the time. friend replied. Though the case of MIL is not new, but i hv seen yet another type of MIL today.

How come women become so brainless with regards to bahus, i dont undstd. These very females have onced managed their houses, brot up kids, built residence, etc.

Till now, in such cases, the bahus have mostly done same thing : accept the mil as she is, ignore her comments, try and change/adjust as far as possible .. but at the end of day .. the bahu lives under constant distress ....

bullshit ...

i seriously feel like using tactics like TV serial vamps ....
go to some guru/tarot reader/feng shui/some swami or mata .... bribe them and tell them to tell MIL if she utters in-auspicious words/thinks inauspicious ... it will affect reverse way!

i m so very frustrated abt this ... if i were in ur city, i wd have come dresses as a mata and did it for u...

dont laugh friends pls ... kya karen ..

i just feel for Tina

friend aba replied. hi tina. sangini is right. don't bother abt what ur mil says. try to buildup ur confidence. comparing u with ur bhabhi is an age old tactic to maintain her importance at home. maybe she will putdown ur sil by comparing her with u!! life is not meant to be wasted bothering abt such people. ur hubby is good to you. so look at ur marriage & work towards maintaining a good relation with him. u r going to spend the rest of ur life with him not ur mil. its his opinion which shd count to u not ur mil's. let the barking dogs bark. when u ignore her comments & start leading ur own life she will grumble or start another drama, but ultimately it will stop. hv u seen with kids?? they tease a kid more if he/she gets teased, they bully more when they get bullied...in essence weak people r always targeted. in life one must be strong. people respect strenght, not weakness. so buck up girl..say to hell with ur mil & njoy life. good luck. SANGINI replied. First of all thanks that u felt so confident about me.. but please i am normal female like u just giving my thoudhts for each post i feel i can be of any help well i read ur post its sad that there are such MILS even today who enjoy giving there DILS nightmares, but you know what she has much more complexes than u praising one DIL in front of other is very old Trick and u falling a prey is ad comeon lets take an account of you first...
1) what makes u feel inconfident about ur self.
2) why are you being so superstious.
3) what does your hubby say about the whole thing and does he know even of the Mother's attitude. what is his take..

First of all please stop being superstious about all these Fengsui and stuff like that the more u fall in to all the more u will loose confidence all this too some extent is ok but toomuch can cause really harm to your confidence and believes, see there is BURI NAZAR but to start believing what she will say will be true is just our insecurity and when it comes true u start feeling that she has that power of giving BADUA, please don't think this was these things really don't matter imagine i start giving BADUA to some well known man or woman do you thing it will harm there Luck and Fortune no not possible u also know that only thing is your MIL is so SADISTIC AND SELF CENTRED that she just wants u suffering and boss u but may be u are not letting her do that so she is calling HER ELDER DIL a KASHMIri etc... say these things are for samll minded people in tis world we meet wierd people evryday and but for them we can't spoil our life so what you have to is stop bothering stop listening to her and i think you have had enough so next she speaks just tell her to mind her own business and after that just be confident and live your life on your own terms and just ignore her i know it will be toudh initially but u know on the long run you will be the winner..
so come out of all this start living life to the fullest enjoy do what ever you want go to parlour you need not hide just stop showing your complex that ur effected by her talks the day you do things confidently she will stop saying...