Relationships  Discussion Forum

My parents r old&retired.my mom is aheart patient.I have a younger brother who is yet to b married.my parents,&brother live in a rented house which is 35km away.so frequent meeting r out of question. we have a 2 bedroom house.we have 2 kids.both of them dote on there grandchildren.It is very painful for me to see my mummy working & cooking the whole day when insted she should b taking rest.I want them to come to my place to live with me.but on the other hand my inlaws &my husband would not approve of this.he thinks that taking care of myparents is the responsibility of their son.I have not talked to him abt this topic.onthe other hand i think that keeping boyh my inlaws & my parents in the same house would not b a good idea.help me as to what should do. suhani replied. i also face same problem as yours. mine is still worse as although i have elder brother and his wife, they keep nagging my parents for money rather than taking care of them. so my parents have taken decision to separate from them. i know they wont come to my home becoz my MIL is too nagging and will keep on creating big hungama till lives of all of us are in hell. what i have thought is to help them financially as i am working and gettig good salary and to keep visiting them regularly so that they wont feel lonely. PriyaPrabu replied. hi Shwetambari,

Think of this.Ask your parents to move to a house which is very near to your house.Let them be in that house (So that they will also be free).You just cook the food and go there and give them and help them and speak with them for sometime. Reema replied. Hi shwetambari,i have exactly similar problem.Both my parents are ill,my father has difficulty in walking and my mother also has health problems,i cannot depend on my brother too because he is spastic.Iam very much worried i dont know how to help them.on top of it i have a very horrible nagging MIL.getting a house closer to yours is not easy.I feel very depressed at times when i think of them.Dont we have responsibilities as children towarsds our parents or we are there just to do the SEVA of our arrogant inlaws.even i dont have an answer.
spa console replied. I really appreciate you concern for your mom.but as you said having inlaws and your mom at the same place is not a good idea.if they are living in a rented house why dont you ask them to shift to some place near you,maybe walkable distance.so you can go in your free time and spent time with her.
even if everyone agrees and your mom stays at your place.there will be disagreement from your husband and inlaws.your mom at all times will try to be quiet because she will not want you to be in any kind of trouble and she will lose her freedom. SANGINI replied. I understand your pain, but i think shwetambari as we females once married can't take up the responsibilty, I think even your parents would not agree to that and even if they do and all your inlaws and husband all agree even then it is sure that there will be problems in the future and many of your family issues or anything that you donot want your husband and his family to know may also be open, nad moreover in your inlwas mind it will always be as that your parents are staying in 'THEIR' house so i think please don't ruin therir respect also. You know i called my parents for a visit to my house as i stay abroad moreover my husband is very nice but even though sometimes their are some small issues here and there so now anyhow they are leaving but many things i never wanted to tell my husband regarding my famly are known to him and secondly i now feel you know even if they stay with you and then you have problems it is not worth it as your parents would be happy to stay like this than to see you unhappy, as you have some duties towarsd your children and husband.

Try to help them out by going to them or financially but i think staying together is not a good idea....