Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hello all,

I am 9 months pregnant and is tired with my BIL and his family visiting us almost everyday. They are very nice people but SIL is very lazy and don't like to cook at all. They bought house near us and end up at tea time or dinner time and never leave at all. Sometimes, i have to cook all over again to accomodate everyone. In normal circumstances, i don't mind, but am working full time and having less energy lately. It really irritates me when they just show up like that and don't leave plus she has two kids. I have a son too. My patience level dealing with kids at this phase is almost getting nil and i have to deal with 3 of them instead of one. I do take care of them, when they are there, but once i go to bed, gets so tired that take out all frustation on my husband who is working full time and has started business too. He says you should know how to tackle this situation and he has gave me liberty to say anything. But its just me, i don't know how to handle it? I mean, if its friend, you don't care and tell them to leave, but when it comes to family, its a different thing. Once i tried not to serve dinner till very late, but they just don't leave...It was time for my son to eat and how can i feed one kid and not others who are in home as well? I do show it sometimes on my face and she is smart enought to understand it, but they just don't leave taking advantage of me. She has her kids, don't she understand pregnancy pain? Currently, she should be helping me out insted of taking my help. Also, she never helps out....Whenever she needs break, they come to my home and her husband is very very smart in supporting her...Few years back, he get laid off and was staying with us for a while and at that time she was pregnant. He supports her so much that she don't even move a glass of water from here to there and they all stayed in their room all the time..Just shows up when its dinner or lunch or eating time and i stupidly keep on doing all the chores by myself. My husband is not really good with all this family techniques and is a really easy going cool person.

I am getting very very annnoyed with them, but at the same time, don't want to spoil family relations as he is the only brother my husband has. What should i do? Cool replied. Hi,
I too have gone thru somewhat same state during my pregnancy. My hubbys cousin used to come with his wife and that female was so lazy ..she used to sit watching tv and chit chatting.
You dont have to be rude but the next time she is there around dinner say in a polite tone that you dont have enough food for all and tell her \";I hope you have dinner cooked as i dont have enough food for all and I feel so tired I cant cook again \";
And even after that if she is not ready to leave dont serve food for them. Do it once or twice ..she will understand.
But you maintain a smile on ur face !
Second choice : You eat before she arrives . And serve only ur kid on his normal dinner time .. You can show the empty vessels that there is really no food left ! console replied. Your husband has given you enough liberty to tackel the situation.then just openly tell them.that you are tired and cannot cook and work for them.if i was in your place i would have openly told like that or asked her to do some work along with your.it is affectiong your baby and you so dont overexert yourself.take care. Ann replied. why don't you start going to their house oftenly. Eat before you leave your house, but stay in your bil's house and don't help his wife at all. So, after few days she will realise her mistake.
But if this doesn't work. Then keep this quote in your mind and start working on it, \";its okay not to be nice.\";