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Joint Family:too attached to MIL
2005-07-27
Name: Kavita HDDI



We have been married for 6 years and my inlaws used to stay with us for 2 years. We moved to US and are here for past 4 years. I brought my 4 month daughter to US and from then on me and my husband have been taking care of her solely. I have started working for the past year and I am pregnant now and expecting my second child. My husband works from home.
My problem is that my inlaws are here for past 2 months and will stay till I deliver. My daughter used to be very attached to me before but since my MIL is here she is getting more attched to her and wants her for everything from play to eating etc. Since I work I cannot spend the whole day with my daughter. I feel very insecure and frustrated because when my daughter ignores me and asks for my MIL when I am there. My husband feels I should ignore it but I somehow have been unable to. I want my daughter to behave to me like she used to before and I try my best to spend time with her when I get back home but still am no match to my MIL full day at home. Now that my daughter's summer program is coming to an end so she will be at home the whole day with my inlaws and I really fear it.

any advice or experiences similar to this??

Thanks
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2005-08-05
#1
Anonymous Name: Nisha
Subject:  Cool



Hi Kavitha,

you should be more happy that you inlaws are taking care of your daughter... it is only matter of time.. later you daughter will always come to you... finally mom matters to any daughter.. so be cool... since you are pregnant ... don worry on such things... n be happy..

take care...
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2005-07-27
#2
Anonymous Name: dc904
Subject:  normal



it's normal for your daughter to get attached to your MIL with all the time she;s spending with her. short of quitting your job, you cant stop her attachment to her, but you can foster your own relationship with her - maybe start having special alone time with your daughter - take her out to the park or bookstore - just you and her a few times a week - maybe spend a full saturday with her and your husband alone - when you come home from work, let your MIL help in other ways, while you give her a bath and read her a story or play with her.
and just remember that atleast it's just a temporary visit
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2005-07-28
#3
Anonymous Name: worried
Subject:  Thanks!



Thanks for the reply. I do spend close an hour everyday after getting back from home with my daughter and also read books to her at night and she sleeps with us. On saturdays I take her to classes alone.
I am not sure whether I could do more but defy try...

Thanks
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