some more quirky prego QandA's - Due Date Club November 2003 Discussion Forum

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Due Date Club November 2003:some more quirky prego QandA's

2003-08-21

Name: Avi Q. How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
A. If it's the flu, you'll get better.

Q. Does pregnancy affect a woman's memory?
A. I don't remember.

Q. Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear end, and even my feet
have
grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?
A. Yes, your bladder.

Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's
borderline irrational.
A. So what's your question?

Q. What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A. For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Q. What's the difference between a nine-months pregnant woman and a
Playboy centerfold?
A. Nothing, if the pregnant woman's husband knows what's good for him.

Q. What position should the baby be in during the ninth month or
pregnancy?
A. Head down, pressing firmly on your bladder.

Q. How do I know if my baby has dropped?
A. He/She will start crying. Be more careful!

Q. How long is the average woman in labor?
A. Whatever she says, divided by two.

Q. Does labor cause hemorrhoids?
A. Labor causes anything you want to blame it for.

Q. How does one sanitize nipples?
A. Bathe daily and wear a clean bra. It beats boiling them in a saucepan.

Q. What are the terrible twos?
A. Your breasts after baby stops nursing cold turkey.

Q. Can a mother get pregnant while nursing?
A. Yes, but it's much easier if she removes the baby from her breast and puts him to sleep first.

Q. What happens to disposable diapers after they're thrown away?
A. They are stored in a silo in the midwest, in the event of global chemical warfare.

What causes baby blues?
A. Tanned, hard-bodied bombs.

Q. What is colic?
A. A reminder for new parents to use birth control.

Q. What are night terrors?
A. Frightening episodes in which the new mother dreams she's pregnant again.

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2003-08-22

Name: Avi
Subject:

jus' chillin

Glad you liked em' Ruchika, Hetal and Simmi.. I will be off sooner than you guys..by the 15th of Sep most-probably... he he he.. :)
But, I am so used to having stress in my life, I am getting a bit worried about not having anything to do, so might postpone the beginning of my break to the first of October.....we'll see.....either case I will be off before you guys....he he he

We should try and keep in touch even after the babies are here like Simmi says, it would be a lot of fun... :)

2003-08-22

Name: Ruchika
Subject:

Good ones Avi

Hi avi,
They were really nice. Good start to my slow day. My parents came yesterday and I don't feel like to be working here..I just wanna run back to my home and enjoy with them.
BTW I am planning to take off from first week of november. I am due on 11th.

Take care
Ruchika

2003-08-22

Name: hetal
Subject:

funny stuff

hey Avi

this is realy funny. it`s make me very happy thanks for sharing with me

2003-08-22

Name: Simmi
Subject:

Good Stuff

Hi Avi. Lovely read, sure made a Friday start very amusing!! Thx.
Btw, I am hoping to take time off from second week of Nov, what about you? Hope we r able to keep company as near the delivery as possible. Of course, once the little one comes, it would be tough but we will get on track about sharing our experiences soon enough!
Take care.

2003-08-21

Name: Nikita
Subject:

Cool stuff!!!

Hi Avi,

This is really funny. Ur cousin is doing a very good job by sending u such cute jokes and u r doing even great by cheering us all up.

Really enjoyed it...(I'm still smiling ;D )

2003-08-21

Name: Avi
Subject:

aren't they cute..

Glad you liked em' Nikita....I do cheer me up a lot........

I've been a bit low, like Rekha, and these surely made me smile and am glad it did to you all too........

2003-08-21

Name: Nithya
Subject:

Good ones!

Hi Avi,
I am Nithya from Dec board. Thanks for cheering me up by posting fun stuff. Finally( after three stressful days), I had much needed smile on my face while reading these jokes.

Take care,
Nithya

2003-08-21

Name: Avi
Subject:

keep em' smiles coming

Hey Nithya, glad you liked em'...I know, stuff can get stressful at time, try smiling more often......it's good for both you & the little one inside :)

Take Care

2003-08-21

Name: Avi
Subject:

cute indeed

Hey Vindhya, my cousin keeps sending me these really cute joke thingys......cheers me up a bit......

Hey, hope you are feeling better...sorry to hear about the bump. What did the doc have to say about it????
Dont worry about the anemia, just take care for 2 more months and everything will be just fine....

-Avi

2003-08-21

#10

Name: Vindhya
Subject:

Great article

Avi,

The information was great. It answered all my questions about iron. Thanks for sharing.

Yes, work will keep us occupied and gives us some exercise especially for lazy ones like me.

Vindhya

2003-08-21

#11

Name: Avi
Subject:

iron info...

Vindhya, do check out this website if you haven't already. It has some cool iron info...
http://www*nms*on*ca/Secondary/iron_is_good_for_you.htm#Iron%20Shortage

I am sure the antibiotics will work and the bump will go away.. Just take care....

TAking off from the first week of Nov would be cool (since you are due end of that month)..I think, going to work will keep us occupied and busy, I am sure we'll get bored out of our minds if we were to stay home the whole day...
I still feel like all of this is one long yet sweet dream, so yeah I cant wait for the month of Nov to see my dream come true... :)

Take Care

2003-08-21

#12

Name: Vindhya
Subject:

Couldn't diagnose

Hi Avi,

Thanks for sharing the fun stuff.

Regarding the bump, the attending doctor whom I visited had no clue whatsoever. She just prescribed the antibiotics. I need to see my doctor if it still persists.

Regarding aneamia, the doctor said the level would not have been considered low if not for being pregnant. So, I guess we need to deal with this for just another three months. I am due at the end of November. By that time, you'll have your baby. Isn't it exciting...

By the way, regarding your question on the other post - I am planning to take leave from first week of November.

Vindhya

2003-08-21

#13

Name: Vindhya
Subject:

Good ones

Avi,

Each joke is funny. I don't know from where you all collect such funny stuff.

Vindhya

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