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Parenting Teens:Love thy Teenager

2007-05-22

Name: Editor Do you find your teens have gone out of your control? Do you think teens today are worse than those in the past? Do you believe that the generation gap between teens and parents today is growing? Do you feel parents are being too strict or too liberal with how their teens behave? Do parents fail to empathise with their teens today?

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2007-05-25

Name: Tina
Subject:

Food for thought

I think parents are to blame if teens go out of control.

2007-05-29

Name: Slayer
Subject:

Yeah!!

Totaly agree, man... sum parentz try 2 b 2 dominating man, like sum dictator or sumthing.. kids need da freedom...Brk all da rulez and lve life kingsize!

2007-05-23

Name: humber
Subject:

Whack them

My advice is to not SPOIL TEENAGERS. They are nothing but trouble afterwads and only a true whack on their head brings out something good.

2007-05-25

Name: Parashuram Godbole
Subject:

Hit Your Teenager

Hiting your son or daugheter is not right. Love them, but yes, if someitmes you need to enforece discpleine, you have to use force.

2007-05-24

Name: Preeta
Subject:

YOU need a whacking

It is because of people like you that teenagers turn violent. What do you teach your kids by whacking them?
At this age children need all the symapathy and understanding we can give them.

Teenage is asuch a crucial phase in a child´ s life and if handled by incompetent parents such as humber, can wreck a child´ s life.

And if you were thrashed by your parents, dont settle scores with your children.

2007-05-23

Name: Simon Templar
Subject:

Reason for violence

I think kids are turning violent because of the lack of empathy. You have these school shoot outs because teens are lacking in guidance. People don´ t want to sit down and sort out their problems. A little more empathy might result in a little less blood on our hands literally.

2007-05-23

Name: Janaki
Subject:

to humber and ankura

Humber and ankura need counselling. Studies have proven that beating and other such primitive measures never brings obedience. Rather, it incites the child to be more rebellious. And then, teenagers are not ´ children´ . Humber and Ankura should realise that there is another stage between childhood and complete adulthood. Lastly, I wonder if there is any point to all this since even adults don´ t behave like adults!

2007-05-23

Name: ankura
Subject:

I agree

I agree with humber ben...empathy shempathy does nothing - children are becoming violent day by day and need to be controlled.

2007-05-23

Name: dadaji
Subject:

don´ t forget

youth will always be different - for better ot worse - after all its also a matter of our perception.

2007-05-23

#10

Name: Rupa
Subject:

kudos dadaji!

Dadaji completely got the point. He has said what I wanted to say all along. That is the attitude we must all employ. After all, attitudes today are drastically different from attitudes a century ago. Today´ s adults would be thought of as worse than teenagers by people from bygone eras!

2007-05-23

#11

Name: anushka
Subject:

How to deal with anger

the problem is how to re-direct anger. The article does not supply any good ways to do so. Discipline is the only answer but it should be even-handed.

2007-05-25

#12

Name: Ahalya
Subject:

answer

I think she means the teenager´ s anger. They have a lot of angst and suppressed aggression, especially the boys. That is one of the reasons why rock music and othe rheadbanging stuff and violent computer games are so popular among them. These can be counter-productive at times.

2007-05-23

#13

Name: ruchi
Subject:

who?

Whose anger are you talking about? That of the teenagers or the parents? I´ m confused!

2007-05-23

#14

Name: Lekha
Subject:

viewpoint crunch

The basic problem is that people can only see things from their viewpoint. But in certain roles like parent or teacher, it becomes necessary to understand the other person as well. Pareants forget that their children have to grow up too. My opinion is, just let your teenager be. Do not tolerate rudeness. But do not expect them to place safety over entertainment.

2007-05-23

#15

Name: Rupa
Subject:

some issues

The article was okay. But I felt it did not provide any new information. Secondly, I do not agree at all that teenagers are as impressionable as young children. On the contrary, during adolescence, the negatives in one' s parents appear more glaring and teenagers do all that they can to not be like their parents. That sentence in the article is very misleading and abominable. Thirdly, there is too much emphasis on spending time with the teenager. That is exactly what they do not want much of. If you increase family time, they will feel smothered. Rather, change your way of communicating during the time you spend together.

2007-05-23

#16

Name: Rupa
Subject:

reply to koushik

You have merely repeated what is mentioned in the article. Kids are definitely impressionable. But adolescence is a period of self-discovery. It is a stage where the peer influence is at its height and not that of family. All psychologists will vouch for this. Secondly, most parents want to spend all their time with their children. It is not an issue that needs addressal! But on a typical outing you will find the teenager looking bored and embarassed and the parents trying hard to look like they are enjoying and everything eventually escalates into a fight. The article should have focussed on how one should employ tact in handling teenagers. Merely giving morre time can provide no returns. And yes, we are not talking about a close knit family here. The subject is teenagers.

2007-05-23

#17

Name: Koushik
Subject:

Another point of view

I somehow disagree with your comment. Though I would agree that there are exceptions, when it comes to character teens and kids are apt to mimic their parents. The likes and dislikes and habits of a teen are a reflection of their upbringing. Even if they do try to revolt, you find some characteristics are hard to disperse with. With regards to the time spent with the teenager, families need to stay together and at least spend a little time together every week, otherwise you will have a fragmented family which in the long run is likely to have a catalytic effect on society at large. Agreed teens need their independence and shouldn´ t be smothered but quality time with family is also a must for a close knit happy family.

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