The MMS Incident

The incident of a DPS student filming a sexually explicit video clip of his classmate and forwarding the clip via MMS to his friends has shocked the entire nation. What's happening to our values?

The MMS incident in Delhi has shocked the entire nation. A DPS (Delhi Public School) student filmed a sexually explicit video clip of his classmate in a compromising position on his cell phone, forwarded the video via MMS to his friends. Before long, the video was circulated to almost everyone in school, and to their friends. The principal got wind of it and expelled the two students in the video.

The two children were from respectable, well off families, and that they decided to take part in an act such as this came as a shock to all parents. After all, if your child's friends were having sex in school, you may suddenly feel that it is very possible your child is having sex as well.

A teenager cannot easily tell right from wrong. If most of your child's friends are indulging in some form of sexual behaviour while still in high school, your child may not think it is such a wrong thing to do. At this age it is also easy to get carried away by the entire illicitness of the act and make the grave mistake of filming it, like these students did.

Who is to blame? Is it the institution, the parents, peer pressure, or the erosion of our value system?

Parents are pointing fingers at the school, saying that the school's complete lack of discipline is to blame, while the school says the problem lies with the upbringing of the children and the lack of family values.

Clearly the answer is not so easy. The school has taken a firm step by banning the use of mobile phones with cameras in school. Here's what you as a parent can do.

If you would like your child to carry a mobile phone, ensure that it is a basic one. Don't give him a mobile phone with a camera.

Software that blocks internet access to adult sites has been available in the market for a long time now. Make sure you get the software and install it on your computer at home. Easy access to illicit information is also a major cause of the trouble. Even if your child surfs the web regularly and doesn't try to get on to porn sites, often one stumbles across such sites by mistake.

Similarly your child's friend may forward adult links or adult clips to your child. To prevent this, install software that prevents your child from downloading anything from the web. If your child just needs the computer to browse for information and check his mail, there is really no need for him to download anything. However, if your child is more computer savvy and would like to download music and programmes, you should not discourage such activity.

Remember that you can only prevent your child from doing something to a certain extent. If your child is determined to do it anyway, he will find a way. The best thing that you as a parent can do is to show complete disapproval of a particular activity, so that if your child does something behind your back, he knows that you will not approve. If he feels you will not mind, it becomes easier for him to do it.

Don't have unrealistic expectations from your child. If you are very strict, your child will feel that you do not understand him anyway and will not have much faith in your judgement. If you are understanding to a certain extent, your child will value your opinion much more.