Register | Login
Login
Sign in with:
---------- OR ----------
Create Account | Login
Create account
As a Member You Can:
  • Join clubs to discuss your interests
  • Connect with people like you
  • Share information, seek advice, get support

   
parenting
in Mumbai (change city)
Select City
  • All
  • Delhi
  • New Delhi
  • Gurgaon
  • Noida
  • Mumbai
  • Pune
  • Banglore
  • Hyderabad
  • Ghaziabad
  • Chandigarh
  • Ahmedabad
  • Kolkata
  • Chennai
  • Coimbatore
  • Jaipur
 
Raising Children Topics..

 
You are here : home > Raising Children > Relation between Siblings > Children At War

Children At War


Do your children fight often? Have warring siblings turned your peaceful home into a battlefield? Here's how to cope.


Picture this. Your elder child was playing with a toy, and then the younger one came along and decided he wanted it. So a fight ensues, and both come crying to you. What do you as a parent do?


Don't expect sacrifices from your older child

Parents often take the side of the younger sibling and tell the elder child to fork the toy over to the younger one. "Give it to your younger brother. You're a big boy now, you shouldn't be crying over a little toy."

Parents often lose sight of the fact that although one child is older than the other, they are still both children, and it is unfair for you to always expect your elder child to make sacrifices for his younger sibling.


Be fair

When your children come to you to decide the outcome of any situation, make sure you come up with a fair decision, without considering their ages. After all, its not your child's fault that he was born earlier, is it? Then why is he being punished for it again and again? And don't think your child doesn't realise that he is being unfairly punished. He does, and may hold it against you or against his sibling, and may develop insecurities. In addition, this approach will only foster sibling rivalry.


Give each child his due when required

Also remember that there are times you may need to treat one child differently from the other - say on one child's birthday. If your other child feels neglected, don't rush to make it up to her. However, don't ignore her feelings either. Explain to her that it is her sister's birthday, and so all of us have to work on making it special for her. Let her know that you will do the same on her birthday. Don't play down the importance of one child's birthday, just so the other child doesn't feel neglected.


Draw fighting rules

Draw certain rules with regard to fighting eg. no yelling, no hitting and so on. Every time these rules get broken, pull out chairs, place a timer on a table, and make your children sit still on these chairs for a fixed amount of time. Tell them that they are not allowed to talk, and if any child opens his mouth, his time will go up by 5 minutes. You could then place a couple of drawing books and colouring pencils in front of them and let them spend time colouring. They will be itching to get up and talk to each other and don't be surprised if you see them whispering or gesturing to each other.

However, don't punish them without listening to each side of the story. Although it is easier to punish all your children when they are fighting, there is often a reason as to why the fight broke out, and there will often be one child who is more in the wrong than the other. You could still punish all for yelling or hitting each other, but let the aggressor know that what he did was wrong. This way, your other child or children will not feel misunderstood.

You may also be interested in:

Poor Immunity in Kids
(32214 views)
Fussy Eating Habits
(21214 views)
Gender Bias
(80280 views)
Sharing Toys
(26355 views)
Cancel
Save Edit
parenting
Notifications
7 Comments
Sort by Newest

.3 years ago
Great article ,thank you
 
 
 
.
Reply
Lyla.4 years ago
good article.please suggest some more ways of keeping peace between the siblings. It is getting me on my nerves.
 
 
 
.
Reply
Gina Davis.4 years ago
It is difficult managing waring kids. They both fail to understand explanations. It is like an unending saga.
 
 
 
.
Reply
Inzzy.4 years ago
like the article,some thing we know but forget to use in our daily life,good article for parents
 
 
 
.
Reply
Back to Previous Page   |   More on Raising Children Index

 
 
Discussion Forum - Recent Posts
Do your children fight often? Have warring siblings turned your peaceful home into a battlefield? What have you tried to control this situation?
view more >>
DISCUSSION FORUMS ON
Articles
RE:Lessons From Children
hello editor,
sometimes its right, and sometimes its wrong also, childre ...
- anudas    read >>

RE:Lessons From Children
hello editor,
the adult definitely learn lots of things from kids, and n ...
- ajinkya    read >>

RE:Lessons From Children
hello editor,
kids are very innocent and they dont know who is smart per ...
- niraja    read >>

RE:Lessons From Children
hello editor,
sometimes its right to say we adult learn from childrens a ...
- umesh    read >>



All tips on Relation Between Siblings
You ever wanted in one place.
No need to go anywhere else. No spam.

*No spam only genuine emails
Follow us on:




Featured Articles - Infertility | Baby Development | Health and Fitness | How to Get Pregnant | Parenting Advice | Weight Loss | Pregnancy Advice | Name Numerology
Baby - Baby Photo Contest | Lucky Names | Lucky Birthdates | Horoscopes | Chinese Calendar | Compatibility Test | Fun Zone
Parenting - Message Boards | Planning a Baby | Pregnancy | Parents of Babies | Baby Names | Baby Name Poll | Birth Announcements | Parenting Quiz
Family - Cooking Club | Love & Relationships | Beauty Tips | Kids Weight Calculator | Recipe Maker
General - Calorie Counter | Personality Quiz | Love Signs | Compatibility Quiz
Home | Site Map | Privacy Policy | Comments or Suggestions | Indiaparenting News Articles | Contact Us | Advertise with Us | | RSS
Copyright (c) 1999 - 2017 India Parenting Pvt. Ltd.

ASK A QUESTION
Why do some children behave in a disrespectful manner? How to stop children from being disrespectful...
ASK NOW !