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India Parenting
You are here: Home > Message Boards > Parents of Schoolgoers >  Role of in-laws >Family/Marriage counsellor in chennai
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Role of in-laws:Family/Marriage counsellor in chennai
Name: venkat
I am living in Chennai. It will be really great, if anyone can suggest a good Family/Marriage counsellor. This will be the greatest help any one can do to me.
Name: SSJ
Subject:  to venkat..
Hi Venkat,
These days there are so many counsellors available and as someone said it is not true that in india people dont seek the help from the counsellor..Actually you dont get appointment that easy ..There is one counsellor name BRINDA JAYARAMAN(you might see her in television interviews) she is good and her address is
Brinda Jayaramna
Anchor Self Help Access(ASHA)
#7, II Floor
Lavanya Apts,
CP Ramaswamy Road
(in between Lifestyle and Mookambika complex)

and venkat,onemore thing ...whenyou go for counselling she will come up with so many questions and dig the past which will be bitter sometimes!!!! and if your problem is serious then you can seek someone you really can make realise where you are going wrong and how you can set it right..Any ways,
My Best Wishes to have a happy Life
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Name: venkat
Subject:  Re: consellor

thank you very much. i will check up with them. This is really a great help to me. I posted this message in 3 groups of indiaparenting, where all these in laws issues are discussed and i have got a reply from a single.

however i find if any post related to topics like (hei... my mom in law is a witch or something... or hei.. ladies should be submissive ) gets more than 10 replies....

i do not want to hurt any one, but i sincerly feel that people here in this group can suggest solutions which can work like counselling or anything which they tried and worked.

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Name: Sekher
Subject:  Help
Read your message. As someone said, it is always good to take the initiative to seek a counselor to solve a problem. If you involve another person for the problems between the husband and wife and the another person is not related to any of the two involved, it is good. Basically the problem lies with the change in attitude of women of these days compared to the women of the past. I remember one eminent person of USA write in his book, in fact, he died in the 1970s, " These days when a woman in betrothed to a man, she begins to worry that ´ Since I am engaged to this man, will HE be able to keep ME happy all my lifetime?´ . If and if only she began to worry thinking, ´ ´ Since I am engaged to this man, will I be able to keep HIM happy all my lifetime?´ THERE CAN BE NO PROBLEM.
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Name: ?
Subject:  Just wanted to say
Hi Venkat,

It is not true that topics like My MIL is a witch get more than 10 replies and others are ignored. Your own post -- Answer me ladies- has got almost 10 replies and everyone is genuinely trying to help you.

I think the reason you have not received many replies to this message is that you are asking abt counsellors in Chennai. People like me who would have loved to help you but are not from Chennai or have never even been there cannot answer your question. Even those who are from Madras may not be able to help you since they may not know about any marriage counsellors, since it is still uncommon in India to go to a counsellor.

Anyways I am sure we all would like to help you/ give you sugessitions if you need them.

All the best.
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Name: SG
Subject:  Hi
Dear Venkat
Its great to see you taking the initiative to take up the counselling route - Good luck and its a very positive step.

Here are two names I \" googled\" to come up with - I don't have any personal experience to vouch for them. Both are chennai based:

contact Saras Bhaskar on 244 6590/98412 33716
Dr. Brinda Jayaraman and Dr. Saras Bhaskar, Chennai's most reputed psychological counsellors with more than two decades' experience

Dr. Thara Srinivasan, marriage counsellor and Director, Schizophrenia Research Foundation, Chennai (SCARF).

Excerpt from a good article:

The men feel that the expectations of the women are immense, and they cannot please them however hard they try, despite a sizeable contribution to the family. They are under pressure to improve financial contribution, share in raising the children and provide emotional support to the wives. With tremendous pressure at work, the men suffer emotional exhaustion. The simpler role of husbands in the past decades has now been replaced with a more complex role. But the emotional needs of a woman are different: she wants a soul-mate, someone who can understand her needs, someone who is caring and one who will take care of her when she is unduly stressed.

The goal in a marriage is to become united in purpose and spirit, not to overpower and control each other. Couples that are already emotionally bonded have little or no trouble following this, because they have learnt how to behave in sensitive and caring ways in each of their life's roles. Couples emotionally distant have great difficulty accomplishing this goal, because they are accustomed to doing what they please, regardless of its effect on one another.

\" There is no perfect marriage and there never will be one - neither is it necessary to be so. All the fun will be lost if marriage is always sedate and predictable.\"

And in the words of Khalil Gibran, poet and philosopher on marriage:

. . . let there be spaces in your togetherness
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you
Love one another, but make not a bond of love
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup

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Last 7 Posts of this Board
yaah totally agree with u priya at the initial stage it will help but after some years she can get seperated she should clear it with her in-laws well in advance. it will be great living with in laws as well as difficult to adjust too. ... - kim [View Message]
living seperately in far place from them is the only option as they cannot travel everyday there to interfere and just cut off contact from them for some days or reduce it at high level so they will understand the value.... - mira [View Message]
yaah showing her such articles on it will help. she also love his grandson so it will be helpful fr her to understand. use sometimes harsh words. it is not right to spoil a kid like this.... - tina [View Message]
yaah ignore her...this is the best option. sometimes being silent makes a huge she know u don't react she will not come up with any issue.... - megha [View Message]
yaah in our country people treat their DIL like that way there are very few who get love and affection like her own home. it is very serious condition in our country. explain it to ur husband he will understand.... - siya [View Message]
yea Ravina, this is definitely a great option. when she talks to her husband ,they both can definitely come a good solution for it. Mother in laws understand only the language of their son and he would definitely be successful in making her understand. ... - rakshita [View Message]
spoiling your child
mother in-laws dont understand the languge of kindness of sweetness. Tell her and show her facts as to how she is spoiling the kiddo. tell her to give him something nice and healthy when he throws tantrumss. be rude... - rakshita [View Message]

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