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  BODY HAIR AND YOUR DAUGHTER - by Editor


Mummy, I think I should start waxing. All my friends have started waxing. Nonsense, you're too young. Wait for another two years. Why, I didn't start until I was sixteen! There is no reason for you to start at just thirteen!

Often parents don't really know when they should start their daughter on waxing, and believe the later, the better. You're thinking that she should be concentrating on her studies instead of on beauty matters. Be realistic, and understand that just by disallowing her to wax will not automatically ensure that she stops wanting it and starts concentrating on her studies. If you really think about it, there is no reason why your daughter needs to wait until she is much older. Generally any age after 11 should be acceptable. Girls discuss who is hairy, and while they may not necessarily be cruel about it, they could have planted a seed in your daughter's head that she has hairy arms or hairy legs. By disallowing her to start waxing, and by disallowing any further discussion on the topic, you will be causing her to feel insecure about her body hair.

11-year-old Samina was extremely conscious about a little hair on her upper lip, and wanted to get it threaded, but her mother refused to hear of it. She was too uncomfortable to mention it again, so one day she took a wet towel and tried to scrub it off. The only thing she succeeded in scrubbing off was her skin, and she spent the entire evening at home covering her mouth with a towel, and then going to school the next morning with a bruised upper lip.

Archana was a little more daring. She simply started shaving her upper lip with her father's razor, until her mother noticed her little stubble. Her mother shouted at her a little, but for the most part, understood, and taught her how to bleach her upper lip. It helps if you explain to your daughter at the outset that she should not use a razor on her face as she will develop stubble, and that when she grows up a little there will be various hair removing options available to her.

At the same time, if your daughter has not yet starting showing a desire to being waxing, there is no reason for you to make her conscious about her body hair. She will come to you when she is ready, and whether she gets ready at an earlier or later date, be sure to be open to discussion. You could promise that she can start waxing if she obtains a certain grade. Tell her that at this age she should be focusing on her studies, but at the same time, let her know that you understand. You could perhaps keep it as an incentive. If she gets good grades in her next exam, if she starts waking up at a certain time, or if she goes regularly for her tennis lessons, she can start waxing. Don't be vague. First start waking up at 7:30 every morning, and then we will see. Of course your child is not going to start waking up at 7:30! Why should sheNULL Come up with a great incentive, give her a time frame, and then stick to your word.

To take another example, ten-year-old Tushima didn't like her moustache, but never did pay much attention to it until heard the boys making fun of Asfiya's moustache. Let's buy her a razor for her birthday! said Prithvi, and everyone burst out laughing. Tushima's hands flew to her own upper lip, and she asked her mother if she could maybe start bleaching. 'Of course, said her mother, and never again did Tushima have to feel self-conscious about that again.

The minute girls hit puberty, their bodies start undergoing changes, changes they are not entirely comfortable with. They start slouching and wearing oversized shirts to hide their breasts, men start looking at them differently and roadside Romeos start whistling at them and making passes. She really has enough to feel self-conscious about anyway, and you don't need to add body hair to that list. So if she wants to start waxing at 13 instead of at 16, by all means, allow it.


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Comments on Article

Name: Raj
City:   USA, CA
Comments:   Nice article. I like your thaughts that mothers should understand and should be a good partner and friend to thier daughters. well done
Name: shivani
City:   australia
Comments:   very good and informative. The relationship between a mother and daughter is of love and trust.we should contribute by being understanding of each other's needs
Name: sumaiya
City:   Dallas
Comments:   Well i am 15 and my mother didnt' let me start till last year but that is when i sneak started and she allowed me, belive me a bond between a mother and daughter is someting tobe cherished and you explain that very well.
Name: rajni
City:   mumbai
Comments:   hi!i'm 17 yrs old.I don't have a hairy upper lip but it appears dark.Should I go in for bleachingNULLCan I bleach my entire faceNULLWill it harm my skinNULL
Name: Amanda
City:   Malibu
Comments:   In response to Rajni - I have been bleaching my entire face for about 5 years. I think it is perfectly ok to do so.
Name: aarti mehta
City:   vikaspuri,delhi'
Comments:   nice stuff pleasetellsome home remedy to get rid of facial hair
Name: mee
City:   ererewee
Comments:   well i started shaving my upper lip and its been like a yr or so now, and now my hair is starting to grown within days...is there any solutionsNULL
Name: Seema Shah
City:   PAKISTAN
Comments:   Hi I am from Nadeem
Name: Seema Shah
City:   PAKISTAN
Comments:   Hi I am from Nadeem
Name: black
City:   london
Comments:   don't start waxing because you could end up with ingrowing hairs which looks unsightly. waxing will also distort the hair roots and this will affect you using more permanant solutions at 16/18 years old. laser treatment is the best form of hair removal and although it takes time and can be expensive, the price is coming down all the time and the technology is evolving to improve speed. the best thing to do is to use a depilatory cream until you are old enough to laser.
Name: tsk
City:   toronto
Comments:   i was a person who had alot of excessive hair. i wax, a little painful but alright. i have an old fashioned mom who doesn't wax or thread or use make up. when i was little i used to complain about the hair on my upper lip or on my arms and legs. she said it was alright. i eventually figured out how to get rid of the hair. now that i'm older and don't have that problem any more. but i still wish that my mom told about stuff like waxing and threading instead of me experimenting with razors and stuff. so to all the moms i would like to say that be there for your daughters and be willing to talk about stuff. i thought this article was great!
Name: Megha
City:   Iselin
Comments:   Is it true that bleaching can give you skin cancerNULL
Name: pranathi
City:   delhi
Comments:   send in information for just teens,health,skin care,communicating with parents
Name: shweta
City:   new delhi
Comments:   the article was very nice. but i m sorry to say that still my is refusing to wax i m 13 yrs and my mother is a old belief women but my friends use to laugh at me. i dont understand what to do. pls reply me
Name: malkah
City:   london
Comments:   very goodNULL london
Name: Chetna
City:   USA
Comments:   My daughter, unfortunatley, got blessed with all the body hair that I have. I have learned to deal with it, but what can I do to help her before it becomes an issue for herNULL
Name: sweta
City:   USA
Comments:   I am 12. my breasts started to grow when I was 10. Now they are large.My uncles touch my breast when he hugs me. my mother tells me to stay quite as we owe him for bring us here. She says he will not hurt me. This morning he put his hand in in my gown and felt my nipples. I let him because he say he love me.And it felt good. My mother is right
Name: Rachel
City:   England
Comments:   SWETA!!!If you are a real person then you need to sort your self out! Your uncle has no right to touch your breasts! He may have brought you where ever you are living now but you can show your thanks without him touching you up!!!!!!! Its Sick!!!!
Name: gore mom 2 desi kids
City:   usa
Comments:   thanks for the advice. I am virtually hairless (on face and limbs) and what I have is so fine and white you cant see it. My daughter is 1/2 Indian and is has a little dark facial hair. I wondered about what to do about it, if I should do anything at all. Now I think I will allow her to wax if she asks me. Thanks
Name: samuel
City:   las vegas
Comments:   your articles are really good and help kids & parents reationship .
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