Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hi,

I have been married for nearly 5 years now and have been a victiom of this violence myself.Though in my case, i
warned him thrice, told his parents..and when there was no change or help..i returned back the hits...though thr ratio was obviously
lesser...it has not happened for the past 1 year but the severe verbal abuse continues.day in day out...
we have a 2 year old daughter now and i am extremely extremely worried about her.
My family or his doesnt give an ear to my miseries....
for them...good house..car...all luxuries...u have all.then why crib?

I feel severely depressed to hear abuses all the time..against me and my family.
after another year of so, when my daughter starts understanding...what will be the impact on her.how can i stop this?

he has had a very sad childhood and is full of anger against his father who has had similar history.

I feel all the good education or great designation and salary etc that i may have...
lack of honour and respect....

disrespect all the time from him ... when alone or infront of his family...

i feel a loser...very very depressed.....

i dont know my fate but i surely cannot bear it anymore...

can someone help..... chahak replied. I wrote a long reply.but this site doesnt allow it to be posted.

thanks all.if the msg doesnt appear by tomorrow, i shall rewrite.till then bear with me.i need advise. Ritika replied. Hi Chahak,

I' m sorry to hear about how your husband is verbally abusing you.

I googled for a women' s shelter in Bangalore and found details of this organization - \" Vimochana\" . Their address and others details are: 33/1-9 Thyagraj Layout, JaiBharath Nagar, Bangalore 560033. It deals with many women' s issues from domestic violence to labour issues. Activities range from counseling, service provision, education and outreach, mobilizing and organizing, activism.

You can try contacting them for help.

All the best!! Radhika replied. Chahak,

I understand your situation. Was your hubby like this since the beginning? What is the main reason he is abusing you so much? Is he disturbed because of any incident / issue / behavior of anybody? You said he is full of anger against his father. May be thre is someone who is behaving with him the same way and he is taking that frustration out on you. After all, at times men think that they \" own\" wife. But forget about that... just try to find out first the reason behind this behavior... dont think about divorse or anything like that.


why dont you take him in confidence and start livign seperate with him. I dont know if you have a joint family, but if yes, then this might be the reason...


you have a 2 yr old daughter, believe me kids these days are very smart... they understand everything, they can hear everything... so YOU first stop being weak.

Be a strong person.
helppriya replied. Do u work? Financial independence is a big thing. I know u are worried for ur daughter and my advise is dont put her through all the abuse otherwise she will grow up to have all -ve thoughts and a lot of frustration. Get a job if u dont have one and warn him if he continues with this kind of behavior u may just opt out of this marriagee. Best of Luck!