Relationships  Discussion Forum

I am married for 1.5 yrs and in my 9 month of pregnancy.My husband wanted me to deliver my baby at my inlaws place though I was totally against it but just for his happiness I agreed to my in laws place.Until now everything was fine n I really had great pregnancy period.

My Mi, who is a dominating and egoisitic lady, has never liked me for anything.She critisizes me for everything I do.Insults me in front of her neighbours n house maids. I am a working girl and like to keep myself busy but my mil doesn' t even allow me to do anything in kitchen and to remain good in my husband' s eyes, in front of him she talks nicely to me and tells me to take rest whenever I offer to do anything. I am really getting bored and depressed due to her behaviour.She has made my life miserable here.

My DH is otherwise a nice n caring man but loves his parents blindly.They are just interested in his money.Its been almost a week with them but I haven' t herad of single thing from her abt my baby.My Mil doesn' t like if I talk to neibours who really loves me.she doesn' t like if talk to my parents also. I am so fed up..pls suggest how shud I convince my husband to take me back to our home which is in differnt city.I don' t want to deliver my baby in so much tension.I don' t want to hurt my hubby' s emotions as well. sonu replied. Hi Sanya

I think maybe u should speak to your husband and tell him how u feel....just say u dont feel comfortable here and would like to rest in your own house after the baby comes.
Its not difficult to manage after a baby.
I had a c-sect and on the 8th day i was cooking and cleaning, looking after baby aswell.
My mil came to do all her orthodox rituals and that was it..she didnt help me with the baby or cooking or cleaning and u know what i am glad i did it by myself as i have learnt to prioritse and routing myself. Yes it would have been nice to have help but its not that difficult to do it on ur own either...stressful help like that is better not to have to be honest.
U wll be in more depression if u stay at ur mil' s after the baby comes as ur husband is not there on a day to day basis.
What about if u tell ur husband that u want ur baby to settle in ur house and if u feel that after the baby comes then u will tell u mil to come there...that way its ur house and u dont have to take orders from her...play her own game
when on ur own talk how u want to her then when ur husband is there be nice.
Try to record what she says to u then let ur husband listen to it....
I know its not nice to do that but its better ur husband opens his eyes and sees now before its too late

good luck Rag replied. Hi sanya,
Is your Dad OK now? Cause as Ritika said you can go there..or be in your In-laws place itself for your delivery .it will be very difficult for you to manage yourself,look after the baby,doing the chores etc for yourself...it takes atlest a month to heal and come to normal...it will be more hectic initially after delivery cause you have to feed the baby very often,change the diapers etc..and most of them will be in POstportum depression too..so you need someone to help you.If you cannot go to your mom' s, be at your in-laws place just for a month or two..for the sake of your baby and yourself dont take any words in to your mind,just ignore whatever she says/does.who knows after seeing her grand child she might change!!! atleast in front of your hubby!!then you can move on to your hometown..
otherwise there will be more tension cause your hubby is trusting his parents..you will become bad infront of your hubby as well your in-laws.(My own experience)Just think about everthing calmly and come to a good decission which is not going to hurt any one especially your BABY....GOOD LUCK! Ritika replied. ok Sanya,

one question. Why did you not go to your parents place?? And why are you now not thinking of going there??

Being alone after delivery will be pretty tough with no help.

take care...