Beauty & Grooming  Discussion Forum

Hello friends, I am Aruna, a software professional and recently had a love marriage.
And he belongs to an orthodox family. Very hardly my mil accepted our marriage. Since the day of her acceptance of our marriage,I had to be away from all sorts of my modern dressing and hair styles. Forced to wear old cotton sarees of elders, since it is told to be good. And my hair to be applied with til oil and plaint it with yellow ribbon, since yellow is meant for sowbhyagya.And now she shocked me that she have a vow to tonsture my head and studs to be arranged on the both sides of my nose on the banks of river at Madhurai. I am really tesed and shocked. we r moving tomorrow to Madhurai. And when i discussed this with my husband, he denied to help me and asked me to obey his parents. Alaki replied. Hi Aruna,
Since you belong to orthodox you have to follow all these.But you have to explain it your husband in nice manner and request him in good way and make him understand about your problem. Lakta replied. Hi Aruna,
So you belongs to orthodox family it is seen rare people will follow their customs also and i wish you would do follow also and i hope you would suggest good and bad also for all the people also. sneha replied. So you had done the head shave finally can you say about that and how was your exp about that why don't you share all the details if possible in the forum and that would be better also and i wish you would do that. lucy replied. Then you have done head shave by respecting the decision of your elders and you need to think about them and you made them happy also.But how did you felt when it is being done to you can you share it with us? Ekta replied. hi aruna
So you have to respect your mother in law decision because she hardly accepted you bahu you have to get an good impression from her and the later you can explain what problem will you face also. Levi replied. Hi Person,
So you had done the head shave finally can you say about that and how was your exp about that why don't you share all the details if possible in the forum and that would be better also and i wish you would do that. Saisha replied. Respect your inlaws and create a good impressions infron of them. Maybe they will change their thinking later sruthi replied. Hey Aruna
There should be a mutual understanding between couple,you have to understand your husband and vice versa.i think the latter is not happening.i wish he could give u a chance to explain. sruthi replied. If yours is a love marriage,you must have struggled with lot of issues.Why dont u obey such traditions which are rarely seen today.. Kaira replied. Hello Aruna,
Then you have done head shave by respecting the decision of your elders and you need to think about them and you made them happy also.But how did you felt when it is being done to you can you share it with us. kali replied. Hello Aruna,
So you have to respect your mother in law decision because she hardly accepted you bahu you have to get an good impression from her and the later you can explain what problem will you face also. PRETHI replied. i am prethi. I am living chennai, working in a private software company named Sutherland in velacherry. i am 24 years old married to a south indian orthodox brahmin family 2 years before(arranged marriage). my husband is living in abroad (Saudi Arbia) my mother in law said i must be pierced nose. since 2 yrs of marriage life we have done it. so i said ok went to our native place for my nose piercing in district of tirunelveli we left on friday night

all our family members gathered there all were came to see my nose piercing function. fially all set to do my nose piercing my mother in law said that i must give my hair to god before nose piercing. here comes the sad moment i have upto knee lenth and denied to do it. My Mother in law forced me to do it in front all. As per the customs i must remove all my underwears i denied as fast came mother in law and my cousins removed all my dress incuding panteas, i was made totally nude. and made me to sit in front of male barber who is aroun 25 years of age. i was crying a lot. Barber asked are u ready my Mil forced me and said ready. he divided my hair into two parts completed wetted my head sharpened his straight razor and started shaving for my forehead. after 10 mins i was completely shaved. then my mil said as per customs u have to shave your whole body. i denied and how can a male barber do this for a female? Mil shouted and said shouted and said u must do or else get divorse i have no option rather than doing it.and MIL pushed me to the barber who waiting then he removed my eyebrows and then asked me to raise my Right hands he saw a bush of hair and wetted with water and rinsed for for few mins. same way the left hand also. after doing that he strted shaving from chest,Breast removed the public hair and here comes the climax he made me to stand and checked whether i have any hair in the below part. i have lot of hairs and he was suprised how i maintained these many hairs for such long days rinsed the part throughly well and took the razor and instructed me not to move if i move may cut. then he removed fully. then he asked me whether i have any hair at the arch hole. i nodded and said yes from my eyes. he told me to kneel down and buldge your buttocks so that he can do properly. he ran the knife throught that parts i was screeming like anything since it was paining a lot. then the shave is completed. my mother in law took me river banks which is of 15 mins walk took me totally nude i was crying and she was holding my both the hands tight. then i bathed and asked for dress to wear. she said wait darling after nose piercing u can wear. i shouted and said noway . my mother in law gave me slaps on my bald head and cheeks and said do what i say.i obeyed her words and went nude behind her. all my family members were looking at me. i was feeling to face them becuse i was nude. then the nose piercing started the man started to put hole my right nose before that my mil brought sandal paste to apply in my bald head. then my nose piercing function was over all were looking at my naked body and some laughing. then i wore new dress which was given by my mother in law. went to temple and good dharsan and returned home the very next day monday before leaving to office i forget that i was bald and started to comb.I was late office by 1 hour on that day. late due to late night sleep. all staffs saw me coming in with covering my head with dupata. removed dupatta and saw my head shaved completed and asked what happened to your hair. i said due customs while nose piercing we have to shave our head completely.then all then touched my head which was shinning later all started call me mottai and saved my contact number as mottai prethi. nd my neighbours saw me evening when i am returing from office what happened to u asked once again i gave the same reply to them. on wednesday all my friends came to see me they were all shocked and called mottai mottai mottai was the noise around my house. all toched my bald head nice and soft head. I hate my bald head. sulekha replied. dear did u shave pandu replied. go for head shave mam..... Keerthibtech replied. Dear Aruna i am keerthi justnow saw your mail i am a btech student my sister and my self also offering our hair at Tirupathi for next year. can you send your Photos is be courieges for us anitha replied. hi aruna did ur head shave is over r and ur nose is pierced r u enjoyed your head shaving i ask u because iam going to shave my head on monday if ur head shave is over post ur experience Radha replied. Love is about giving and not having your own way in everything. You loved him and married him. With that comes the responsibility of keeping him and his parents happy on many things if not on all things.
Hair is something which grows back. Offering hair and having traditional nose studs does in no way make you less beautiful, rather it will enhance your beauty in some ways. As long as your ' loved' husband is happy with it you should also be happy with it.
So stop whining, get the traditional tonsure and the nose studs with a smiling face. You will win many hearts that way, most importantly your m-i-l and your husband.