Beauty & Grooming  Discussion Forum

Hello friends, I am Aruna, a software professional and recently had a love marriage.
And he belongs to an orthodox family. Very hardly my mil accepted our marriage. Since the day of her acceptance of our marriage,I had to be away from all sorts of my modern dressing and hair styles. Forced to wear old cotton sarees of elders, since it is told to be good. And my hair to be applied with til oil and plaint it with yellow ribbon, since yellow is meant for sowbhyagya.And now she shocked me that she have a vow to tonsture my head and studs to be arranged on the both sides of my nose on the banks of river at Madhurai. I am really tesed and shocked. we r moving tomorrow to Madhurai. And when i discussed this with my husband, he denied to help me and asked me to obey his parents. Reema replied. Hi dear please calm down and relax and speak to your mother in law and explain her that you need to move ahead in life and if this is the case then you cant stand in corporate world as these are two different mediums. Sagarika replied. Hi Aruna are you serious that your husband is not supporting you at all as you had a love marriage, please speak to him clearly and tell him that if he not supporting you then you can have a divorce filed. Seema replied. Hi dear please do not panic as you need to fight back and you should not loose hope, please be strong and fight back and make your husband realize that if he doesnt supports you then you can leave him. Sarita replied. Hi dear the same was my story when we got married as my husbands family was very orthodox but must say that he was very supportive and he knew that all these rituals are not meant to follow so make explain your husband also. Sangeeta replied. I can imagine what pain you are going through but trust me you should not obey these old rituals from day one now you have started obeying this so his parents are forcing you to obey all the decisions. Shivangi replied. If you can do one thing then please leave the house for sometime and do you have any friend where you can stay for a while then just do that your husband needs to understand the issue as he is thinking that its fine. Anjali replied. Hi dear please make your husband realize that this is not right and make him feel the pain through you are going stop talking to him for a while he will understand and he will stop his parents to force you in following the rituals. Amaira replied. Hi Aruna please do not loose hope and explain your husband that what his mother is doing is wrong and playing with your career and you are loosing the opportunity in moving ahead in life i am sure he will understand. Anamika replied. Hi dear please do not feel bad but you must be knowing all this earlier then why did you got married to a person which is having such orthodox family, now nothing can be done in this as you need to follow his parents. Anaida replied. Hi dear please do not panic and speak to your own parents and tell them all what has happened, please do not hide anything from your parents as they can only help you in this matter. Aditi replied. Aruna this is really sad as you being educated and your husband also being one why cant he speak up and stop this wrong happening done in the family as this will not make any sense, please force him to stop his parents. Kirtika replied. Hi Aruna its not about being orthodox its being religious and i dont think its bad idea so just follow the footsteps of your mil and you will be happy once you get worth of it. Tina replied. Hi dear just relax and follow the rituals as they are not bad and also explain your mil to just give some ease to you so that even you can enjoy your life. Nirmala replied. Is your parents aware of the same if not then please take the help of your parents as they will help and take action also against such fools. Karuna replied. How can you take this being educated you should also educate your in laws and you should tell your husband to support you in this matter. All the best. Jigna replied. Hi there i can relate yourself with me as the same case is of mine, even my in laws force me to wear clothes which are old fashioned and they not allow me wear to clothes which i like. Heena replied. Reading to your post feels very bad and feels that still people are so orthodox, such people should be boycotted from the society who ill treat their children and daughter in law. Falak replied. Just go ahead and fight for your rights and if your husband is not supporting you then ask for your parents to help you out from this matter. Ishh replied. This is completely unacceptable what kind of a husband he is seeing his wife sacrificing and he is mum in front of his family where his male ego gone. Amruta replied. Dear friend please make your family a bit broader minded as you are a software engineer and not an illiterate person, hope to see you happy in life.