Has anyone ever had an experience that you did something that was just not like yourself due to hormones? I had a miscarriage (my third) three weeks ago. I sit right next to someone at work. It's never bothered me before, but for the last week has bothered me when I see her typing personal e-mails to people. I got so frustrated that when she left her desk I deleted one of her personal e-mails. She was asking me if someone was at her desk. I knew she would never know who did it-but I had to tell her what I did. She was understandably upset and I feel like I've made of mess of things. I talked with a counselor and she thinks it's hormones. You get irrational thoughts and behavior. Other people have told me that this just isn't like me-totally out of character. Now I feel even worse than I did before! I care about this person and I know that I hurt her. I just need to try to understand it and possibly know that this has happened to someone else-that I'm not losing it!
Thanks. Dara replied. Yes it is hormones. I had a miscarriage a week ago. The baby did not have a hearbeat. I do have 2 daughters but before them I had 3 stillborns. Please get counseling or go to support groups for help. You are not alone and nothing is wrong with you. pari replied. i totally agree that people react differently under stress. i never wished ill for anyone till i had my miscarriage. but after that...i was never happy when someone else conceived. i thought my baby should have come before that baby. and then i started killing all the insects in my house...harmful or not...in a very brutal way. i cant explain y i did it. i have never been like that.
i dont think u r losing ur mind...its just frustration. start writing a diary. write everything u want others to know but cant say. it helps a lot.
try sitting by the lake, or in a temple or just in a balcony with good view.
try crying loudly when u r alone in ur house or if u r comfortable...in ur husband's presence. u just need to vent it out. everything will be ok. dont worry. its a passing phase.
its just that i know the pain of miscarriage and the long wait to become a parent...it does make u do crazy things. i still keep trying to keep my mental balance...
take care,
love,
pari. k.radha replied. Hey Alice

First of all let me just tell you I am so sorry to hear that you've miscarried, it is a hard loss for a woman to bear for so many reasons... Given that this is your third miscarriage I find myself wondering if your feelings are affected even more because you've gone through this sad thing before.... Have you and your partner been trying to conceive for a while?

I don't think there is any hard and fast rule as to how you should behave after all you have been through but it is obvious that you're struggling to deal with your emotions... Maybe you're alone in you actions, perhaps no one ias done the same things but everyone here in this forum can share something with you and that is your loss... We've all been through it to some degree or another, miscarriage, neonatal death, still birth and some women here have faced tough choices like electing an abortion because the baby was not well... It has been easy for none of us here but we struggle through as best we can.

Many have wondered if we were loosing our minds based on our thoughts, action and emotions... It isn't easy to judge what one person does and compare it to another but I think I can with this... Alice you've been through a lot and more than anything you need to try to control your emotions, try to assess the rational of your actions before doing them and more than anything continue to see your counsellor... Keep posting your thoughts and someone will be here to listen and hopefully help... Very best wishes...