Hey guys, wondering if any of you are having to deal with parents/in-laws when it comes to choosing a name for their little ones...

I can deal with my parents when it comes to their suggestions..but the trouble has been with my in-laws... m-i-l wants us to name the baby after a god but I am so not for it... I feel bad, guilty and depressed for saying no to a god's name (I feel that may be he is testing my loyalty through my m-i-l)and but I am so not happy with naming my baby after a god...

I just want him to have a short, cool, easy-to-pronounce yet meaningful name...

Hubby doesn't say anything to his mom...he say's ok for everything she suggests and tells me that we need to find a way to make them happy too.... aaarrghhhhhhhh...
I dread calling inlaws nowadays cause the conversations now-a-days just seem to frustrate and depress me...and I cant even express my feelings like I can with my parents cause they are the in-laws....

am I getting all wired up for a small thing??????This is the last thing I need to be getting stressed out about at this time....but cant help it...
Loveyoubaby replied. Hi Avi, IMO tell your m-i-l that she can send the names that she likes, you will keep if you like them. Then she will be happy by thinking that you are listening to her also and wont bug you again and again. Later when the baby comes keep whatever name you want to keep. Talk to her infront of your husband to avoid any kind of misunderstanding between you and your hubby.I am sure your husband will also support you.
As far as my situation is that I am not discussing about names except my family because I know I won't be able to say \";No\"; to my in-laws if they suggest any names.
I hope my suggestion will help you. Simmi replied. Hi Avi.
Avi, with everyone's suggestions, I think u will be able to work out a solution. And once the in laws see other complimenting the name u choose, they will learn to appreciate it too.

As for calling god names, I suggest u tell ur hubby that as a mum u would call ur son in all moods and tones and most of all u will call the child's name more than anyone else. If u r not happy with the name, it is not fair. Plus, how can u call god's name in anger or when scolding, cause u would do all that with ur son too no matter how wonderful the baby is, naughty at times, u will have to deal with him.

My family is so understanding they say it is ur right and choice to name ur baby, so whatever u decide we will be delighted.

But in laws have been keen to interfere with even other relatives suggesting names. Names which may be ok in India but not pleasing here at all. And if one says no then mil gets really uptight and insecure! She does know that we need a name before the birth for certificate etc, so no astrology business, however, she insists on considering her options. I don't like her suggestions but don't say no to her, however, hubby says no instantly.

But I don't know what they discussed amongst themselves but hubby proposed that if we had a boy we should name him after his dad who passed away many years ago. I felt bad to say no, but I don't want my child to live in the shadow of someone else. It works fine for goras to have jr sr business, but having ur own grand dads' name, well I politely said, it is a great suggestion but family has own memories and respect for fil, I don't want our child to be interfering with that.

So you see, in my case, hubby and i are split over the names...so that is making things worse!

Hubby cleverly has started talking to my family and getting them on his side with the name choices he has in mind and I am not liking it, as I want to be a part of it too. So girls pls suggest me easy and cool names with R and S. Thanks a lot.
Simmi Ritu replied. Oh Avi, You poor thing ..I can understand how you feel..The worst is these things can actually irritate the hell out of you and they look like minor things to others..hmmm well there is a bit of an issue if hubby wants to make his parents happy too.. Well I would say choose the name u like right now as you know your darling is a boy and then when your hubby calls ur in laws to inform them about the birth just ask him to tell them ..we have named him this..basss..they will fell bad for sometime but us time kuchh keh nahi payenge and then u can say ab birth certificate ban gaya hain and name can't be changed..

the best thing is to patao hubby dear (emotional blackmail / dhamki/ natak ..anything that works) and have him on ur side...by the first week of november. I am sure he will understand if you tell him how strongly u feel about having the name of your choice..

Luckily I am a terror on both sides of the family, so no one will argue with me if I tell them well this is what I like and neither my in laws nor mom have dared to suggest so far....but the worst is I don't have a name..I know we are having a boy.. I like names like Arjun, Arnav, Vikram, Dhruv etc.. Hubby has however only okayed Arjun but is not too happy..any suggestions of similar names ??

But you know what - there is this thing I would have done with my mil (in earlier days of my marriage )wonder if it will work for you.. I would have in your situation told her..no mummy please I like this name ..puhlease..please let me keep this name..this weird beahviour used to confuse my mil as she didn't know how to say a no..esp with my husband around me..so maybe give her a call and tell her' Mom I want something from you..please can I name the baby this , please and sound really sad..call when she knows your husband is with you...then she will be in your shoes and will have to be a bit magnanimous ..

I have given a lot of stupid suggestions.. All the best..

TAKE CARE AND DON'T GET STRESSED..and worst case just finalise the name and tell your hubby to tell his parents he has choosen the name and that's it..You might become a bad person for a day but atleast you won't sulk for the rest of your life..

take care - ritu hetal replied. ya that`s difficult to say in laws but what u can tell them that in us they keep a name like typical indian than after ward here people can not pronous well so they do a some thing related with god so that not good and that`s why u want to keep name which u like and other things if in laws force than tell me that for home u keep in laws decided name so their is no problem. i think this think ur hubby can do
Priya replied. Hi Avi,
I am doing well. Thanks for asking. The website had trouble recognising my id for a couple of days there, so I did'nt end up posting. Had a doc's appt. yesterday, and all went well. Apparently the internal exam is optional and can \";get things going\";. So I elected to wait until next week for it.
more later
PRiya Priya replied. Hi Avi,
Thankfully, parents from both sides have been understanding..and actually, we've had the same name suggestions from both sides, which incidentally is matching with our taste too ( just a convenient co-incidence). We will try our best to fit it in to match the birth star and /or numerology, but if all else fails, we do have a couple of names picked out...all agree that they are nice.
Let's see!
Priya Arshiya replied. Hey, Avi
I am also in the same boat as you are. But, luckily so far I didn't have to speak anything.
My mom had chosen so many names for our baby, she gave me a list of it and they are nice indian names but hard to pronounce. If I lived in India, I would have chosen one of them but not in US. So, I explained her why we wanted small and easy-to-pronounce name and she is now fine with it.
But, when we asked my in-laws about names, they gave us weird looong names which I couldn't pronounce properly. But, luckily they alwasy suggest these names to my husband and my husband directly tells them no and gives an explanation.
So, the best thing to do is convince your husband first, why you need a short name and then have him deal with his parents instead of you. Because as DIL your relations might get little tensed with inlaws, if you say something.

Arshiya