Relationships  Discussion Forum

Hello everyone

I have been married since 2 years and still I feel my husband is formal with me while he is very informal and frank with his bhabhi and wants her advise in his matters . His bhabhi did love marriage to my BIL . My husband is 2 brothers . I feel myself very ignored whenever my husband and his bhabhi sits together . They crack jokes together while my husband has never acted like that with me . With me , he behaves very cautiously . Inside the room , he behaves with me with me well . Till this day , no verbal or physical abusing .
When we all watch movie together then my husband sees to his bhabhi for response
I feel myself like an extra person in his family when I see him very relaxed,happy and emotionally satisfied with his bhabhi .i feel like he does not need me but as now he got married so he is behaving with em well but otherwise he is emotionally very well satisfied with his bahbhi and mother. I am still a new person in his family for him . He does not tell me anything about his family but his bhabhi knows all the things from him and her husband .
My MIL is totally with her . My MIL torture me in every term . Till this day , I never said anything about my qualification or behaved like that but she blames me to be proudy before my husband and appreciates my SIL( his bhabhi) before my husband very much ,whenever he comes back from the office .They MY MIL and SIL both are very much together and My MIL shows me down at every moment before her and worst is that she is giving my SIL support just because to have the so called “KABJA “ (full right )of my husband .
And that is all happening since last 2 years . I am tolerating but now they are doing the same thing with my daughter . They want my husband to ignore her also .
Like my SIL says that her 2 and 3 years kids behaves just like my husband and my MIL
Wants my husband to pay them attention rather than his own baby and he is doing the same . He becomes very happy when he watch the photos of kids of his bhabhi . but never shows interest in his own daughter picture . He got framed photos of his brother’s kids tokeep on his working table but never thought to put his own daughter ‘s little photo .
My daughter is growing up . I want to place for her as well as for me now at this stage in this family .What should I do ?
Please suggest me .

nancy replied. hi! nupur,read your article.
anyway i can understand your anxiety. well,first things first COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR HUSBAND. talking is very imp. discuss what upsets you. lots of problems have been solved because of proper communication. god willing things will work out just fine.
one more imp. thing PRAYERS ALSO HEIP-- DONOT WORRY! Jasmine replied. Nupur -

The first thing you need to do is speak with your husband. Tell him that there are somethings which are upseting you and you would like to discuss them with him. Do not blame his bhabhi or his mom, just point out to him that you would like it if the three of you could spend sometime together.

When all of you are watching movies..look to him and ask him what his thoughts, give your thoughts. You will have to make the effort in bringing up a coversation.

Bring up the idea of a vacation with you and your baby, even a one day outing is fine.

As for the picture of your baby. I suggest you go out and buy a nice big frame one which has a picture of you and him or just you and one of your baby. Give to him as a gift and in the card write a nice love poem or a love letter.

Good luck. It will work out, but you will need to bring him towards you. Men are just that way unfortunately. prabha replied. Hi Nupur,

I don't know Details of your life.I only know the part which you wrote so if any thing u don't like please don't mind.


You should talk to your husband about how you feel(everything what ever you wrote here).Tell him that u and your baby need some more attention from him.
Never try to quarrel with him as this will worsens the situation.

U must be knowing what he likes,i mean the dress and the makeup etc. try to dress up the way he likes.generaly for male people they will be easily tackled with, if you dress as they like and tell him that you like to go out with him(u,husband and baby).this way he can spend some more time with you.

if u have a computer at home send some
Greeting cards to your husband and make
him feel good.

I hope things will be better for u,
Prabha