Thanks Archie, thanks for clarifying, I got concerned about it but after reading your message to my post, I am a bit relaxed.
Also I joined back the work today. I went there for 4 hours only but while leaving home, I felt horrible, couldn't control myself and cried. At work also, I was feeling horrible though I had left enough breast milk for his feeds and he didn't cry when I was away, at least thats what has been told to me. I am going through mixed emotions and lot of confusion in regards to working/not working, feeling guilt sometimes to leave him at home.
I don't know what kids think of their mom when they are working full time. Do they ever feel neglected? What my baby is going to think of me? How is he going to judge me as a mom? All these thoughts are cluttering my mind.
I felt good when I came home, breast fed Arjun for 30 mins or so, played with him for a while, gave him bath, sang prayers to him and put him to sleep. But I am afraid that I might go through the same fear tomorrow. Any idea, how to cope up with it.

Thanks
Arti revathi replied. Dear arti,

I know u'r feelings.All these is becoz of the hormones only.U know arti,when my baby came my hubby for that first week ,he was very tensed and he changed totally.He forgot that i am his wife and at same time baby's mother too.When ever hari cried he scolded me,and took baby away from me.Sometimes when i go to take baby,he told u don't come near,that's why he is crying.

he didn't allowed me to hold baby sometimes.But i had courage and patience.And i talked to him more and more ,i told him this is our baby ,with out mom and dad he can't live now.he need mother to feed him father to hold him ,to tell him ,he and his mother is safe in this hands.Both of us need u.Pls don't leave us alone.

And eventually he changed,why i told u this,is becoz to tell u,if we can change someone's feelings why couldn't we change ours.

Now i got my hubby back.Sometimes now i think when i go to india every one will take care of my child,its a relief for me,but i will miss him lot.I am very possessive now a days.

But what my hubby told ,u know,\";u are his mother,nobody can change it.there's a bond between u two which noone can cut.\";

Arti,it's true,evenif u r not there with him ,when ever he gets the taste of your milk he will feel u'r prescence.and he will be proud of u arti.Only for two days u will suffer.Suppress u'r feelings.I am sure reading all these postings ,u got some relief.

U r working for u'r baby's future.If he didn't understand that today surely tommorrow he will.

Take care,

good luck,
kissess and hugs to lil one.
revathi archie replied. Dear Arti,
Do not get concerned on this aspect. It's not that important issue.
Look normally father goes to full time job, referring to tradition in India but there are numerous kids who are affectionate equally to both mother and father. So sway your thoughts if Arjun would not take it what's going around.

Although your hormones are expected to be back you are still in vulnerable stage and better to keep clam and relaxed.

I am possessive mother even today but I started to leave Advait behind since he was 3.5 months, let me tell you I would not trust even my mother in the beginning, truly. But my husband made me understand that it's futile to think the I was thinking. I heard he was fine with my mother or MIL and he would not show signs of missing mother. However I must say he is very much close to me and his Dad, now he can express his affection and I can swear on what I am saying. Now he is not even in the hands of family.

Try to refrain such negative thoughts, which are going to get you more in agony and cause more serious troubles than helping over issue.

Take care.
Archie Sudha replied. Hi Arti,

I can understand your reaction and emotions but for me it is little much then required. Don't you have faith on your parents and hubby who are there to take care of him? Especially when you are leaving enough expressed milk, I don't find so much reason to be worried. In this way you will not do justice with your work and you will not be able to enjoy even after coming to work. BUT AT THE SAME TIME I AM CONFIDENT THAT YOU WILL COME OUT FROM THIS PHASE SOON ENOUGH.

I don't think that babeis will think otherwise of moms if they are away from them. Infact I feel when they will grow and see how good care they have got irrespective of fact that mother is working, they will be proud of their mothers. What you think?

Take care,
Sudha