Relationships  Discussion Forum

Iam workingin prestigious position in government job,hubby in private sector also in good position ,we have a daughter 3yrs old.Wearestaying in joint family with hubby's brother(businessman),his wife(also working) 2kids ,MIL&FIL.
-My MIL,FIL and hubby's brother do not contribute to family finances &only my husband ,me and co-sis contribute towards family finances.MIL collects pay from us three &spends according to her whims &fancies.Even if we buy a saree for ourselves without her knowledge it is a crime.
-My hubby loves me but does not speak in front of family.
- He is so much emotionally controlled by them that it took me a year after marriage to persue him to learn driving a four wheeler.They always said we are afraid ,he is the youngest he will meet accident etc etc.Even today we are not allowed to go to my parents house by car.It is so frustrating.
-My FIL is a devotee of Sai baba and since he is retired now ,devotes most of the time to the organisation activities,bhajans etc and expects us to do the same.My co-sis gets time for all these since her husband comesfrom shop earlier and devotes time to kids.Icannot do so since Ihave to look after my child and even my husband's needs since he does not get time from pvt sector job.My FIL takes it otherwise and does not even speak to me.It is very hurting.Ihave a habit of answering back since Icannot digest falsehood &wrong.Even my SIL s interference is too much .They behave differently with their own in laws but expects different standards from us for their parents.
HOW TO TACKLE ALL THIS??????
hope 2 help replied. I can help but agree with NAME I also think that if you were to move out you would be eliminating these preasures. How much money are you putting into the home? All your earnings? I would sit down and work out a budget to live independantly, see how much it might save you to move out and then speak with your husband. He will surely see that it could be benificial.

Otherwise go over the current house hold budget and find out the exact monthly costs and then divide it among everyone and ONLY contribute what needs to be given. I hate the way some families treat their children or their spouses like their own personal income machines. It is disgusting that any parent would want to use their children to profit like this but sadly it is common. name replied. Dear Rajkee,

You said you and your husband got very good job,then why don't you start thinking of buying a house of your own and move out? If your in laws says no, say ,it is for us and our kids future (investment).That way you can have a life without putting up with unnessary pressures.