Hi All,
I was very happy to be a mother of a baby boy, with no problems during my pregnancy even. I delivered a healthy baby of 3.5 kg. At 23rd day of his birth he experienced heavy breathing we took him to the hospital where he was admitted for the treatment of nuemonia. But he didnt recovered for 12 days & finally we took him for ECG-heart checkup,where we found out that his condition was very critical. He had a hole in his heart & there was obstruction in his arteries. It was decidied to operate him the next day. We were very happy to find a ray of hope after 13 days of pain. But we didnt knew that this much pain was not enough. The day he was to be operated we lost him much before the operation. Now we think we have met a God' s child who came us to give happiness but for some days only. It is very difficult to cope with this. Aarav will always be our 1st & elder son. Now We are afraid of another pregnancy.Does anybody body knows about the recurrence of this disease. I wish all the best luck to the expecting mothers.
MP Shantala replied. Dear MP
Please accept my heaertfelt condolences. I am a Fetal Medicine specialist so I would like to give you some advice regarding your query about recurrence risks of cardiac anomalies. From your description of the problem, it would appear that Aarav had obstruction to his arteries and a VSD. Generally speaking, the recurrence risk for cardiac conditions iss 3-5%. This means that 95% of the time, your next child will not be affected. However, there are certain screening tests during the next pregnancy. Firstly, pre-pregnancy folic acid, then, at 11-13 weeks, you must have a Nuchal Translucency (NT)scan. If the NT measurement is raised, the risk of cardiac anomalies may be higher. Then a specialised scan at 18-20 weeks and again at 22-24 weeks (fetal echocardiography) would be needed. Rarely, some cardiac problems are detected late in pregnancy. Hope this helps...All the very best. Dr Shantala sudha replied. my heart goes out for you ...i have no words to console but to say grieve it out we are here to support you..true to what Radha says u can approach support grps who can help u cope better as loosing a child in this stage renders different support
we all are angel mums and can understand whats happening to u ...
yes subsequent preg will b scary and ur doc will put u on a high risk zone and u will b monitered well and more
but as of now dont rush into matters its a slow process and let urself heal...
god bless you and may little aarav rest in peace K.Radha replied. Dearest MP,

My heart goes out to you. I am so incredibly sorry to have read of your loss and can only just begin to imagine the pain you must be feeling. I firmly believe that those who die young are favoured by God and he calls them back sooner than others, this for me has been a comforting thought many times. It seems that your darling Aarav was destined to touch your lives deeply and he will be remembered by you always. He will live on in your heart and in the smiles of the children you will have in the future.

It is normal to feel fear about another pregnancy but I think for the time being you need to concenrate on grieving for your son and give yourself time to move through the many emotions you will go through. Also it is standard practice to avoid conception for 6 months to give your body time to prepare for another pregnancy and time to live through your loss. Given that Aarav had a heart condition you will find that doctors will be screening any successive children for this condition, during pregnancy and after. Also doctors will be far more attentive to any sniffles in those first months if only due to your loss rather than there being an immediate medical necessity.

I don' t quite know what I can say to offer you comfort but this is a supportive forum and those here are only too willing to listen and travel this journey with you. Take as much time as you need to grieve, talk about your son if it helps, keep a diary. Don' t be tempted to feel like you have to keep a brave face because it' s hard enough to loose a child with out the added preasure of being a perfect woman in the process. Also you might try linking up with any local support groups that deal with child loss. Given little Aarav' s age you will find that you would gain the most support from an agency catering to Sudden Infant Death rather than miscarriage and stillbirth simply because the dynamics of the loss are so different. You knew Aarav, spent time, cared for his physical needs and this adds to the grieving process.

MP I sincerely hope you can look to the positives and find meaning in the loss of little Aaravs life... He watches over you and is close at all times. Aarav' s life has changed, not ended... He lives on in your heart. All the best and do look into a support group, it helps immensely! I know many women who look forward to their monthly meetings because it is a time to talk openly with those who truly know where you' re coming from and it feels much like spending a day with your child as the honoured guest. Take care and give yourself all the time and tears that is needed to get through this time. And always when you feel the need, post here and someone will reply. Many blessings now and always

Kate sowdha replied. I am really sorry to hear your condition, I know wht you will be going thro right now. I have a friend who had the same situation except tht the baby survived just few days and after tht she conceived once again and right now she has a healthy baby girl. Time will surely help you to heal and as you said aarav will be your first child and don' t worry you will surely have a healthy second child. Take care of your health and try to do some social work or something which will distract you from the present mindset. All the best for your future.
sowdha