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You are here : home > Raising Children > Parental Dilemmas > Are We Losing Our Values?

Are We Losing Our Values?

Does having a steady job and a regular income as a woman threaten your position and duties as a mother ? Today's woman is highly educated and career oriented. She has very little time for her  child. With the increase in nuclear family setup, the child is  brought up by maids. This can be avoided easily. A balance must be maintained.

Contributed by Lekha Krishnakumar

It was the month of August; autumn was just setting in. One fine morning when I was going out, I saw a two-year-old child sobbing in front of her house. Apparently her mother was going out to work and her maid was trying to get her inside the house. She was refusing to budge. A few weeks later I saw the same child sitting in a park with the maid. There was a morose look in her eyes and she avoided playing with children of her own age. I started wondering...

In today's world with nuclear family system and women becoming highly career oriented, are we losing our traditional values?

Till a few decades ago women used to be homemakers; whereas, men used to be the breadwinners of the family. The upbringing of children used to be the responsibility of the mother. And in a joint family setup it was the collective responsibility of the grand parents and other relatives staying together. The child learnt its first lessons at home. 

Today's urban woman is highly educated, career oriented and has very little time for her progeny. With the increase in nuclear family setup, the child finds itself being brought up by maids. They overlook the needs of the child and cover up their guilt conscience of neglecting the child by pampering him with gifts and chocolates. They are neither able to do justice to the organization they are working for, nor are they able to care enough for their children. Maintaining of a perfect balance between home and work is hardly possible. Increasingly, employers think twice before recruiting a woman in a responsible job.

This results in the child growing up without learning its first lessons on traditions and human values from home. What can a servant teach the poor child? The child is prone to accidents & illness due to lack of proper care. There is a stifling of the finer emotions in the child.

Is today's woman neglecting her duties? Can she shirk responsibilities for dissolution of traditional and cultural values? It is true, the father has an equal role to play in the development of a child. But the role of the mother in bringing-up the child cannot be over-stated.

What can be done to preserve our heritage?

Can making women go back to their traditional role of homemakers solve the problem?  No. 

Women are highly intelligent and educated. Their talent should not be restricted merely to domestic chores. They should be given equal opportunities with men in today's dynamic world. But, how does one strike
a balance? Leaving the child to the care of servants is definitely not a solution. 

The employers have to come up with some innovative ideas to solve this tricky issue. 

Some feasible solutions can be:

  • Self-employment is a great solution for professionally qualified women. This provides flexibility of location and time. 
  • Provision of  at the office premises is one of the best solutions for mothers with small children. As doctors everywhere recommend breast-feeding for infants up to one year of age, this could be a very good idea. 
  • Flexi timings can also be a great solution for mothers with young and teenage kids. 
For how long can this problem exist without a proper solution?  I implore the women of today to teach their children proper human, cultural and traditional values.

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Manik Cooper.6 years ago
This is not a debate between a working and a non-working mother. Both have immense responsibilities and need to juggle many tasks. An educated woman has the right to follow her career path but this she should not do at the cost of her family.
Shuchi.6 years ago
There are many options for women who want to pursue their career and work. even employers are also understanding this need and have different options for working mothers. a working woman can provide much better atmosphere for her baby than a non-working one.
Kanak.6 years ago
no it is not true that we are losing our value. a perfect balance can be attained while managing the home and work. Though it is difficult but it is not impossible.
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