longer hair, curlier hair, straighter hair, a slimmer body, bigger breasts,
more money, a better job, a boyfriend, a better husband, fairer skin, more
wit, more confidence, a straighter nose, smaller hips, a nicer house life
would be perfect.
Self-esteem means feeling good about your beliefs, thoughts, feelings
and desires. High self-esteem is important because it provides a foundation
for you to deal with life's many challenges. Improving your self-esteem
can give you the confidence, strength and resiliency to face and overcome
many obstacles. The root cause of low self-esteem lies in constantly comparing
ourselves with others, and finding ourselves lacking. Many of us look around
us, at all the seemingly more beautiful, happier and more fulfilled folks
around us and feel we come up short. Maybe, in a way, it's okay to think
that. If everyone was completely satisfied with the way they looked, whatever
would happen to the beauty industry! Or the fashion industry! Who would
idealise the Aishwarya Rais and Sushmita Sens of the world There's nothing
wrong in comparing ourselves with others. In fact, such comparisons may
even spur us on to better ourselves. It is when these comparisons start
dragging us down, that we are in trouble.
Be comfortable with your body
Our standard of beauty is rising. What with India churning out Miss
Worlds and Miss Universes year after year, the Indian woman suddenly has
new ideals to look up to. Our perceptions of beauty have scaled new heights,
and when the mirror image doesn't match these standards, we lose heart.
The most common cause of insecurity stems from a dislike of our body image.
Small wonder that cases of bulimia and anorexia are on the rise in India.
We are constantly bombarded by images of perfection. If we don't look like
Lisa Ray in spite of using the same lipstick, we just might sink into a
tunnel of depression.
Snap out of it!
Stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself you look good. Maybe
you need to lose a little weight from your hips, but you look great anyway.
If you are overweight, getting upset about it will not solve the problem.
Working out and exercising will. So you have to work harder than your friends much harder to lose the same amount of weight? Tough, but you're just
going to have to do it, and it will pay off in the long run, when your
bones are hard as steel and you are as fit as a fiddle, and can still run
circles around the block when your other friends who scorned exercise walk
with the support of a cane. Plus, don't forget, you've got other things
going for you that they don't. Perhaps you are more financially comfortable,
perhaps you have a nicer face, a more loving family, or a nicer voice
It's time to understand one basic fact of life. There will always be
someone prettier, richer, wittier or more successful. That does not make
them better persons, or happier. Likewise, there will always be those who
have less than you. They may have less money, be less talented or be less
good looking. But that would not make you any superior or happier.
Give yourself a break
When we compare ourselves with others, we know the worst of our selves
and our lives but we have no idea about the problems others may be facing.
We compare what we are from inside, to what another person appears to be
on the outside. In school, I had a friend who was beautiful, rich and popular.
She seemed to have it all and was envied by most girls in my class. But
little did they know the pain she was going through at home. Her father
was a womanizer, her mother had attempted suicide five times, they had
constant fights at home, throwing things at each other, and she'd cry herself
to sleep every night. Not the ideal life, is it?
Let go of petty jealousies and envious feelings
Life is not about getting one-up on another person. You are never going
to be happy that way. The women you envy today may have far harder times
ahead of them than you will ever face. No one knows what the future holds.
You have got to focus on yourself. Do not moan for the life you had imagined
having or wish you would have. It is very easy to become bitter and blame
the world for all your problems. Grow up! Spend your time trying to be
happy with the life you are already leading.
Picture yourself twenty years from now
The sort of comparison you are now making with your peers lessens as
you advance in years. Suddenly you realise that all of you have turned
fifty, your life is just fine, and those non-productive comparisons just
dwindle away. Why wait till then? You've got one life. Start now!
DISCUSSION FORUMS ON
Hair falls can be due to lack of nutrients in our body. Lots of people nowadays complain about hair loss. That can be because of using various products that contain chemicals and are not good. I always use organic products for my hair. I had bou ... - Hair Fall problems read >>
Husband urge to Shave head every year
Every year, my husband has an irresistable urge to shave his head. He has some holidays in December when he gets this urge. He says that he enjoys the coolness. Any expert views on this? Is this good/advisable? Does shaving head have any effect ... - Sumathi Sharma read >>
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RE:Convincing son for headshave
Used the help of my ladies salon hair stylist. Ladies are gentle and can convince kids easily. ... - Ravishing Mom read >>
RE:Convincing son for headshave
True, Ravishing mom. This works well. Last summer i got my son's hair cleared. He was angry but later settled down and even wrote an essay that i edited and reproduce here for your benefit. All the best:
It was the first day of summer holiday ... - Vidya Bansal read >>
Convincing son for headshave
Does anyone of you have any examples of how you persuaded your son to shave his head? This is the most difficult part but very good for the child. So would be good to share experiences ... - Sumathi Sharma read >>
Not looking forward to loosing it
Hope to get some advice here and support. I am not sure if this forum is the right place, but found a lot of supportive people on a similar issue that others seem to bring up. I have been married for 4 years now and I am a working ... - Akhila Suma read >>
RE:Split ends problem
Hi sister deepthi
Please check your diet. Split ends will be the notification of vitamin b and c scarcity. After family doctor consultation take multi vitamin tablet or eat more spinach and green leafy vegetables ... - MPVijayKhanna read >>
Kindly check you have dandruff slso check your diet. Apply vinegar and allow to soak for one hour and wash by shampoo ... - MPVijayKhanna read >>
Plz do vinegar mask ... - MPVijayKhanna read >>