Beauty & Grooming  Discussion Forum

Hi I am Anjana and I am 26 years old. I have been married for 2 years. It' s been 1 year since my kid was born and now my husband and in laws have planned for a holy trip. Now, what concerns me is .. how could they decide that the family has to offer their hair. I have never even cut my hair as I hold it precious like most women. I don' t understand how offering a part of your identity will appease God. I discussed this with my husband but he blindly believes that it will do good and he just looks at me with wonder about why I am not willing.. But isn' t it a matter of personal preference..? I don' t understand how a woman could go bald and accept it. It may feel good , but how can we loose something which we held on to so dearly for 20 or so years of our lives. I am shocked and unhappy that I ll have to do this. Pls share your opinions and advice if any..
my gmail. : anajana8852 Radha replied. Dear Anjana,
I am Radha aged about 43. At 26, I got my head shaved in Tirupati two weeks after my marriage, more because of vow than any liking for it at that time. My entire in-laws family got tonsured then as per their 5-yearly tonsure custom. I felt so good about the tonsure that I happily got tonsured three more times, the last one being in May 2011.

With experience I am telling you that it is really nice to have a gundu once in a while. And don' t be afraid. You will get back the length of hair in about 3 to 4 years. In fact, you must feel proud that you have entered a family which supports female gundu.

' How could they decide ...' They are the elders in the family and they can decide.

' I have never cut ...' There is always a first time and for hair it better be in a temple and full length.

' a part of your identity' Physical things are secondary identities. Our character IS our primary identity. A change of hairstyle does change a woman' s looks and hence may raise eyebrows, but never changes her identity.

Offering part of body does not appease God. But the devotion behind offering it in spite of the resultant change of look appeases Him.

' Matter of personal choice' Once married, many things personal become familial and hence should be co-ordinated with family requirements.

Many women willingly and happily go bald and accept it. Probably you are not exposed to them.

So come out of the shock, get happy about becoming a ' gundamma' and happily get tonsured with the family.
uday replied. hi anjana i am uday i had seen ur message i can understand ur feelings but u have to go with ur husband try to convince him otherwise go for tonsure hair will grow back
if u want i will send u some headshave pics and videos of women by seeing them u can get courage