I am a 25 year old girl working in an MNC as an engineer. After seeing so many failed ' love' marriages I decided to toe the line of my religious parents. For the past two years they are unsuccessful in finding a suitable groom. Either I am not good for them or the groom has too many bad habits - smoking, heavy drinking, betting - for my liking.
Recently, my parents found a match wherein the horoscope matches on 31 counts which is a very close match. They dont want to let go of this opportunity. The groom' s side is very rich and do not mind an upper middle class family like ours. They have accepted me. Except that he occasionally takes a small drink in parties (which many males do nowadays, either openly or on the sly) I do not find much that is objectionable in the groom. But they have made a peculiar demand.
When their family came to our house for my interview, I and my younger sister (22) found it difficult to suppress our giggles. The groom' s mother and two sisters - both younger, one married and the other not - have got close boy cuts, wear saree with navel showing, sleeveless blouse with low cut back, large earrings and lipstick. Of course they have cute bindis and nose studs. They said they are also religious but they want to sport mod look to be counted among their rich peers.
I am a traditional girl with waist length thick braid, a nose stud and small earrings. I wear saree in a traditional way covering my stomach fully with blouse of correct length of sleeve. And all of them including the ladies get their heads shaved clean bald at Tirupati once in two years.
Now the groom and his family' s demand is that I should change my looks and ways to ' mod' to suit their taste. When I asked what it is he said \" You must wear your hair in a short boycut style like my mother, wear saree like she does. You must attend parties with me and socialise. Like my people you also should agree to go bald once in two years. And you should have a short boy cut before the wedding reception.\"
I love my hair long and I like my traditional ways. But all the same, I cannot go on rejecting one groom after the other and create difficulties for my parents. They are pressurising me to accept this groom. \" What problem is there in becoming a bit mod? You will get used to it. Many people keep their hair short and many tonsure. You can also go along. Please accept. The groom is a good boy\" my parents told me.
The groom had put another bombshell. \" I am not only a short hair lover but also a bald lover. I want my ' first night' with both myself and my bride fully bald. Only after my mother accepted this term, I have agreed for marriage\" . When I told this at home, instead of getting angry, my folks burst out laughing and said with a wink \" Go along, it will be nice\" .
Now, we have time till 9th of October to say yes or no. If I say yes the marriage will be in Jan/Feb. Since my religious parents do not want my long, so-far uncut hair to be cut in a beauty parlour for the first time, they want to get me fully tonsured in Tirupati in mid October so that I will have enough hair by marriage time for a nice boy cut. Now I want to know the following from the readers.
1. Is it worth accepting the proposal?
2. Is it okay to have a short boycut on a regular basis for a married girl?
3. Has any female the experience of having her suhag raat (' First night' ) with a bald head?
4. Is head tonsure really enjoyable?
5. What would be the reaction of people to a bald girl in working atmosphere?
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I am a 25 year old girl working in an MNC as an engineer. After seeing so many failed ' love' marriages I decided to toe the line of my religious parents. For the past two years they are unsuccessful in finding a suitable groom. Either I am not good for them or the groom has too many bad habits - smoking, heavy drinking, betting - for my liking.
Recently, my parents found a match wherein the horoscope matches on 31 counts which is a very close match. They dont want to let go of this opportunity. The groom' s side is very rich and do not mind an upper middle class family like ours. They have accepted me. Except that he occasionally takes a small drink in parties (which many males do nowadays, either openly or on the sly) I do not find much that is objectionable in the groom. But they have made a peculiar demand.
When their family came to our house for my interview, I and my younger sister (22) found it difficult to suppress our giggles. The groom' s mother and two sisters - both younger, one married and the other not - have got close boy cuts, wear saree with navel showing, sleeveless blouse with low cut back, large earrings and lipstick. Of course they have cute bindis and nose studs. They said they are also religious but they want to sport mod look to be counted among their rich peers.
I am a traditional girl with waist length thick braid, a nose stud and small earrings. I wear saree in a traditional way covering my stomach fully with blouse of correct length of sleeve. And all of them including the ladies get their heads shaved clean bald at Tirupati once in two years.
Now the groom and his family' s demand is that I should change my looks and ways to ' mod' to suit their taste. When I asked what it is he said \" You must wear your hair in a short boycut style like my mother, wear saree like she does. You must attend parties with me and socialise. Like my people you also should agree to go bald once in two years. And you should have a short boy cut before the wedding reception.\"
I love my hair long and I like my traditional ways. But all the same, I cannot go on rejecting one groom after the other and create difficulties for my parents. They are pressurising me to accept this groom. \" What problem is there in becoming a bit mod? You will get used to it. Many people keep their hair short and many tonsure. You can also go along. Please accept. The groom is a good boy\" my parents told me.
The groom had put another bombshell. \" I am not only a short hair lover but also a bald lover. I want my ' first night' with both myself and my bride fully bald. Only after my mother accepted this term, I have agreed for marriage\" . When I told this at home, instead of getting angry, my folks burst out laughing and said with a wink \" Go along, it will be nice\" .
Now, we have time till 9th of October to say yes or no. If I say yes the marriage will be in Jan/Feb. Since my religious parents do not want my long, so-far uncut hair to be cut in a beauty parlour for the first time, they want to get me fully tonsured in Tirupati in mid October so that I will have enough hair by marriage time for a nice boy cut. Now I want to know the following from the readers.
1. Is it worth accepting the proposal?
2. Is it okay to have a short boycut on a regular basis for a married girl?
3. Has any female the experience of having her suhag raat (' First night' ) with a bald head?
4. Is head tonsure really enjoyable?
5. What would be the reaction of people to a bald girl in working atmosphere?
sharmila replied. please send your photos or videos
because i am going to shave my head at the end of this Nov
Srinidhi replied. Hi Prajna,
Nice to hear that you are done with your head shave. It sounds like you have really enjoyed your first head shave experience, and at the same time happy going around with your new look. Seems like you are also thrilled about your next tonsure and looking forward to it on the 20th Nov. I am sure you with definitely enjoy your head shave experience for the second time too.
I wish you and Vishwanath a very bright future ahead and a life filled with lots of love,joy and happines.
Thank you for keeping posted, and do keep in touch and write to my gmail srinidhi.dhanda
Prajna replied. Hi all,
Yesterday I went to office as a bald girl of 25 years. Of course, in spite of friend Sanjana' s ' threat' , I took two scarves, one tied on to my head and another in my vanity bag, just in case. As soon as I entered the hall, up went the chorous ' ho, baldi' . Sanjana came forward, hugged me but before withdrawing pulled away the scarf by one hand (I had tied it over the ears and behind the nape, not below the chin) and caressed my bald head with the other. I tried to look for my vanity bag to get the other scarf, but could not find it. Five minutes later Sanjana handed it back to me but minus the scarf in it. Some caressed my bald head but most agreed that I look stunning and advised to go around bald. In all it was a bit nervous but still happy experience. Even my boss appreciated my looks. I returned home without covering. A large number of people gave second and third looks, some smiled. I smiled back. I think that is the best reaction a fresh baldi can have.
Today, it was normal and most have come to terms with my bald looks. I also have come to terms with it so that my work is not affected. But I am unable resist running my own hand on my head once in a while. It gives such a nice feeling. I do not know why my parents did not ask me to do this till now. I have told Pranati that she should opt on her own for a tonsure at the earliest and enjoy it. She still cannot refrain from running her hand over my head once in a while. She has promised me that she will think over it.
Today, Vishwanath took me in his car to a hotel for evening snacks. I fully bald, he having a ten day old machine cutting and a clean shaven face - made real pair in the hotel with several onlookers giggling silently. Two young ladies with braids came to me and complemented on my boldness.
Well, I have entered the adventurous but joyous world of tonsure! I am looking forward to Nov 20th - the second tonsure.
Bye, till then.
Prajna replied. Thanks to Srinidhi, Girish, Preeti, Kajal and all.
The engagement on 13th was a small and quiet affair. The groom, Vishwanath,
surprised me by appearing sans his french beard and moustache and the hair
with a neat machine cut - something I adore. The marriage has been fixed for
27th Feb in Tirupati. No tonsure at that time for me. It will be done a week or ten days later which will be decided at around that time. The reception would be on the evening of 2nd March on which morning I will be getting my first boycut.
I have already told my colleagues and seniors about my tonsure. My close
friend at my workplace Sanjana has warned me that if I turn up with any sort of head covering she will make my life miserable. So better I come to work with bare bald head and face the people.
On 22nd evening we left to Tirupati and by very early morning we were on the hill top. We took bath and went for early morning darshan and returned to
cottage. My dad called the barber to cottage for my tonsure. First dad got
tonsured.
Then it was my turn. I sat on a mat on the ground crosslegged. Mom opened my
braid and combed it out thoroughly. After saying ' Govinda' the barber wetted my hair with two mugs of warm water. He massaged my head vigourously to wet the hair at the roots. Slowly my nervousness started to build up. No more long hair after this. But I had decided that I should enjoy whatever I had agreed to do. So I tried to enjoy the massage of my head. After about two
minutes of wetting my hair, he made two knots of my hair, one on each side.
He took a new half blade, put it into his razor, bent my head and scraped at
my crown. Oh! what a sensation! I suddenly felt a coolness at the place. He continued to wield his razor there. Pranati started giggling slightly, but I smiled back at her. Now he started shaving around my left ear and a little
later near my forehead on the left side. The left side hair knot fell down
on the floor. Two more minutes, the right side was also shaved and the other knot also fell down. The barber went all over my head once more with his razor.
I rose up touching my bald head. A strange experience! Smooth head! And very cool! Mom, dad, Pranati were all smiles. Looking at my reflection in the
mirror! Oh I was shocked for a while unable to recognise myself. Somehow the
bald girl in the mirror appeared beautiful to me. I only hoped that others would think the same way. I took bath with warm water. The water falling on my head gave another beautiful sensation! Oh! I never thought that tonsuring one' s head could give such beautiful experiences. Now I understood why so many women tonsure their heads. My mom, dad and sis said with conviction that I look really beautiful. Pranati cannot keep her eyes and hands off my head. I have told my parents that I would like to do my second tonsure on 20th Nov in K' katta and they have agreed. I am looking forward to that.
After darshan of Lord again, we are back in Bangalore today morning. What
with Sanjana' s threat and the looming short hair life, I decided to go around bald. Some neighbours laughed, some congratulated, some made wry faces. I do not know What the last group will do when they see me with a boycut and long ear hangings.
I hope that tomorrow my colleagues will not make my life too harrowing.
Girish Kulkarni replied. Hi All,
I am new to this site, got registered just now. We, myself & my wife planning to to go to Palani, Tirupati between 15th Dec. to 22nd Dec. 2010., where we may offer our hair to lord Muruga or Venkateshwara. I am doing gundu every three to four months, but my wife bit hesitant to do complete shave of her head. My son is studying in M> Tech at Vellore, & would visit him also. Kindly share your head shave photos to show the same to my wife.
Hi Prajna,
Nice to hear that you are going to tonsure before your mariage and bald on day of \" suhag raat\" . Best wishes, you could be the first one in this respect. My best wishes to your parents for encouring you to do the gundu and they are accompanying you to tirupati. As of today, have you done your mottai. Please share photos before and after shave.
thanks
girish
swaroopa replied. hello everybody , read a lot of ppl' s experiences .. im doing my 2nd yr b.a economics , my mom wants me to get tonsured at tirupati cos she had a vow when i was in 10th std tat she wld come wit her family and offer my hair to god , as my dad works in lucknow he was nt able to make it so we kept pushing the vow , finally now my mom gt a chance to fullfil it .. we a family of 5 me my mother my father and two brothers .. we are planning to visit tirupati on 24/10/2010 .. when i was in 7th std i got my mottai , i felt really nice but now im an adult going to coll .. i fear tat i cant be free wit mottai in coll and hence want to stop the trip .. pls give me some ideas on how to manage tis issue or is it really ok to be mottai ..
kajal replied. hi
prajna don' t reject the groom
u have not try short hair B4 that' s why u r fear about it when u shave and keep boy cut and get used to it u will not grow u r hair again. and will go bald not in 2 years but every year. yes head tonsure is really enjoyable. my sister in law have long hair and she is not ready to trim split hair she said i will keep ugly long hair but i will not cut it. but when my family go to tirupati and shave their head my sister in law said that she will tonsure her head in joking and not serious for it but my brother encourage her to do it and finally she ready for it and done it after that i have not see her in long hair. now she kept nice bob hairstyle . and don' t think about people you are tonsuring at balaji and its a sine of our tradition so u r not doing it for ' mod'
so best of luck and live happy marriage life
and if possible share your photo and videos of head shave with me
Prajna replied. I thank Srinidhi, Padmaja, Preeti and all others who have encouraged me.
Yesterday we - myself, mom, dad, Pranati (my younger sis) - visited the groom' s house. We talked some more on many issues in a cordial atmosphere. The family has many welcome values - respect God, love family values, have adopted some poor households for educating the kids, do regular community work in a small and silent way, all the family members do regular yoga and meditation, highly nationalistic. On the other hand they have also some Western values - craze for wealth, mod looks and occasional indulgence in alcohol. The last one is a bit scary for me. When I expressed my apprehension, the groom' s mother put me at ease by saying they indulge in it in strict limits. They are going to appoint me as Special Officer, with salary, in their granite company, as understudy to the current GM. I will take over in two years after he retires. The lady has suggested that I can give away all my salary to my parents since I do not have brothers. They can also live very nearby so that I can look after them when required.
The groom has accepted my suggestion to keep his face clean shaved (i.e.without his french beard and moustache - I do not like facial hair, including moustache, on men) and if I marry him.
My mom has suggested that the family appears good and I better accept them. When you get something you may have to lose something. Loss of long hair is too unimportant when weighed against such a nice and rich family. Being rich, an occasional indulgence in alcohol in limits is generally the norm and I should not worry too much about it.
Considering all things, I have conveyed my acceptance today, though with some nervousness.
Based on this, some more decisions have been taken. The engagement - a small, private affair - will be on 13th. The marriage will be in end Feb. Our parents will take me Tirupati on 23rd and get me fully tonsured and again 20th November for a second tonsure. My next haircut will be after marriage and before reception. I will be resigning in early Nov and join the groom' s company in early Feb.
So it is ' bye bye long hair' for me and I think forever. More after my tonsure.
Preeti replied. Hi Prajna,
I am Preeti. I am known in my Bank as ' boycut' Preeti. Two years ago I had long hair. But I got tonsured in 2008 and again in 2009. In between I kept my hair a boycut with clippers - like military cut. See my postings.
A boy cut is really enjoyable. Especially with manual or electric clippers. So do not worry. Go ahead. Agree for the marriage and be a ' boycut' lady all your life. As for tonsure once in two years - wow, it will be really nice.
As for your last question, I was bald twice and I could successfully face the colleagues and customers. You will also be able to do it.
As for your question no 3, you can be one of the first persons. Why not!
Srinidhi replied. Dear Prajna,
I am glad to hear that you feel encouraged reading my replies.
If you are interested to know more about me, please let me know your email id and i will write to you about me,my qualities etc. Don' t mind , but i don' t want to share more personal info on the forum.
aakash s replied. hi...........first i say that tonsuring is a grat experience,,, for a man or women ,it will be nice for bald ever,,,,, then u r in US right?? there its not a problem ,u can do tonsuring and hav bob cut... a girl with bobcut will look so courage,modern and bold enough,but first night with both bald is somewat not nice but as ur husband like that accept it,,, it will be nice.... try to find he is good man...all the best mam
Padmaja replied. Hi Prajna,
I have read your posting and I agree with what ' Srinidhi' said.
It is entirely your decision to marry into this family or not.
You sit and think, wether you would like to shave your head on a regular basis.
Happiness is not in trying to change yourself for others.
How long can you be happy always sacrificing his/her likes , dislikes and adjusting for the likes and dislikes for the other person one is marrying?
Marriage is a lifelong commitment.
Cause this is not a stupid movie which ends in 3 hours nor a saree or dress which you dont like, or can wear it for once and throw it. This is marriage your marriage.
In a marital relationship ' Give and take' should be both ways, not one way.
You said you are a working women.
So think for yourself. How independent are you? Can you keep up with these demands?
It defeinetely sounds odd about first nigh with shaved head.
Its entirely your decision to say Yes or No to this marriage proposal.
Wish you all the best.
dyumna replied. yes, you can accept this proposal, it would be easy and convenient for you to maintain a short hair, tonsuring is really enjoyableonce if you have it, you will like it, initially people would be teasing but don' t mind them
Srinidhi replied. Hi Prajna,
After reading you post i felt like giving you the following suggestions.
1. Whether to accept the proposal or not all depends on you, if you feel you can keep up with what the family is asking for and if you think the person is a good choice for you, give it a yes. Its only you that can decide as its your life and you met him personally.
2. Its always ok to have short hair after marraige. It only depends on whether you like your look or not. Most of the educated people these days sport short hair after marraige. And usually women look cute with a boy cut. So, it all depends on how you like it.
3. Regarding your Suhaag Raat' with a shave head, this definitely sounds peculiar and strange for people who are not aware of some men having a liking for a shaved head. You can find several articles and videos on the internet.
4. Head shaving is a nice experience. I myself get mine shaved once in a few yrs when i visit Tirupathi. Not sure if you ever got your head shaved during your childhood. Once you experience you might know the feeling.
5. Regarding the reaction of people to a bald girl in work atmosphere, you might find people staring at you for the first few days, but i would say if you start thinking of what others would think, you would only get yourself into a dilemma.
If you think the family is really worth and you would be happy after marraige, keep aside the short hair and head shave concern. One more thing i would like to make a point is, since the family is getting their heads shaved in Tirupathi once in 2 years, it does sound traditional, as they respect god.
Whatever be your decision, it is you who is most important to lead a happy and peaceful life after marraige. So i wish you a Good Luck and a Bright Future ahead.
rahu replied. u r right in ur ways keep it up. i like ur views,for more detail u can talk with me.
2010-10-27
#1
Name: sharmila Subject: please send your photos or videos
please send your photos or videos
because i am going to shave my head at the end of this Nov
2010-10-27
#2
Name: Srinidhi Subject: Congrats and Good Luck Prajna
Hi Prajna,
Nice to hear that you are done with your head shave. It sounds like you have really enjoyed your first head shave experience, and at the same time happy going around with your new look. Seems like you are also thrilled about your next tonsure and looking forward to it on the 20th Nov. I am sure you with definitely enjoy your head shave experience for the second time too.
I wish you and Vishwanath a very bright future ahead and a life filled with lots of love,joy and happines.
Thank you for keeping posted, and do keep in touch and write to my gmail srinidhi.dhanda
2010-10-26
#3
Name: Prajna Subject: Baldi in MNC office
Hi all,
Yesterday I went to office as a bald girl of 25 years. Of course, in spite of friend Sanjana' s ' threat' , I took two scarves, one tied on to my head and another in my vanity bag, just in case. As soon as I entered the hall, up went the chorous ' ho, baldi' . Sanjana came forward, hugged me but before withdrawing pulled away the scarf by one hand (I had tied it over the ears and behind the nape, not below the chin) and caressed my bald head with the other. I tried to look for my vanity bag to get the other scarf, but could not find it. Five minutes later Sanjana handed it back to me but minus the scarf in it. Some caressed my bald head but most agreed that I look stunning and advised to go around bald. In all it was a bit nervous but still happy experience. Even my boss appreciated my looks. I returned home without covering. A large number of people gave second and third looks, some smiled. I smiled back. I think that is the best reaction a fresh baldi can have.
Today, it was normal and most have come to terms with my bald looks. I also have come to terms with it so that my work is not affected. But I am unable resist running my own hand on my head once in a while. It gives such a nice feeling. I do not know why my parents did not ask me to do this till now. I have told Pranati that she should opt on her own for a tonsure at the earliest and enjoy it. She still cannot refrain from running her hand over my head once in a while. She has promised me that she will think over it.
Today, Vishwanath took me in his car to a hotel for evening snacks. I fully bald, he having a ten day old machine cutting and a clean shaven face - made real pair in the hotel with several onlookers giggling silently. Two young ladies with braids came to me and complemented on my boldness.
Well, I have entered the adventurous but joyous world of tonsure! I am looking forward to Nov 20th - the second tonsure.
Bye, till then.
2010-10-24
#4
Name: Prajna Subject: I am bald!
Thanks to Srinidhi, Girish, Preeti, Kajal and all.
The engagement on 13th was a small and quiet affair. The groom, Vishwanath,
surprised me by appearing sans his french beard and moustache and the hair
with a neat machine cut - something I adore. The marriage has been fixed for
27th Feb in Tirupati. No tonsure at that time for me. It will be done a week or ten days later which will be decided at around that time. The reception would be on the evening of 2nd March on which morning I will be getting my first boycut.
I have already told my colleagues and seniors about my tonsure. My close
friend at my workplace Sanjana has warned me that if I turn up with any sort of head covering she will make my life miserable. So better I come to work with bare bald head and face the people.
On 22nd evening we left to Tirupati and by very early morning we were on the hill top. We took bath and went for early morning darshan and returned to
cottage. My dad called the barber to cottage for my tonsure. First dad got
tonsured.
Then it was my turn. I sat on a mat on the ground crosslegged. Mom opened my
braid and combed it out thoroughly. After saying ' Govinda' the barber wetted my hair with two mugs of warm water. He massaged my head vigourously to wet the hair at the roots. Slowly my nervousness started to build up. No more long hair after this. But I had decided that I should enjoy whatever I had agreed to do. So I tried to enjoy the massage of my head. After about two
minutes of wetting my hair, he made two knots of my hair, one on each side.
He took a new half blade, put it into his razor, bent my head and scraped at
my crown. Oh! what a sensation! I suddenly felt a coolness at the place. He continued to wield his razor there. Pranati started giggling slightly, but I smiled back at her. Now he started shaving around my left ear and a little
later near my forehead on the left side. The left side hair knot fell down
on the floor. Two more minutes, the right side was also shaved and the other knot also fell down. The barber went all over my head once more with his razor.
I rose up touching my bald head. A strange experience! Smooth head! And very cool! Mom, dad, Pranati were all smiles. Looking at my reflection in the
mirror! Oh I was shocked for a while unable to recognise myself. Somehow the
bald girl in the mirror appeared beautiful to me. I only hoped that others would think the same way. I took bath with warm water. The water falling on my head gave another beautiful sensation! Oh! I never thought that tonsuring one' s head could give such beautiful experiences. Now I understood why so many women tonsure their heads. My mom, dad and sis said with conviction that I look really beautiful. Pranati cannot keep her eyes and hands off my head. I have told my parents that I would like to do my second tonsure on 20th Nov in K' katta and they have agreed. I am looking forward to that.
After darshan of Lord again, we are back in Bangalore today morning. What
with Sanjana' s threat and the looming short hair life, I decided to go around bald. Some neighbours laughed, some congratulated, some made wry faces. I do not know What the last group will do when they see me with a boycut and long ear hangings.
I hope that tomorrow my colleagues will not make my life too harrowing.
2010-10-24
#5
Name: Girish Kulkarni Subject: Head Shave at Tirupati
Hi All,
I am new to this site, got registered just now. We, myself & my wife planning to to go to Palani, Tirupati between 15th Dec. to 22nd Dec. 2010., where we may offer our hair to lord Muruga or Venkateshwara. I am doing gundu every three to four months, but my wife bit hesitant to do complete shave of her head. My son is studying in M> Tech at Vellore, & would visit him also. Kindly share your head shave photos to show the same to my wife.
Hi Prajna,
Nice to hear that you are going to tonsure before your mariage and bald on day of \" suhag raat\" . Best wishes, you could be the first one in this respect. My best wishes to your parents for encouring you to do the gundu and they are accompanying you to tirupati. As of today, have you done your mottai. Please share photos before and after shave.
thanks
girish
2010-10-22
#6
Name: swaroopa Subject: tonsure !!
hello everybody , read a lot of ppl' s experiences .. im doing my 2nd yr b.a economics , my mom wants me to get tonsured at tirupati cos she had a vow when i was in 10th std tat she wld come wit her family and offer my hair to god , as my dad works in lucknow he was nt able to make it so we kept pushing the vow , finally now my mom gt a chance to fullfil it .. we a family of 5 me my mother my father and two brothers .. we are planning to visit tirupati on 24/10/2010 .. when i was in 7th std i got my mottai , i felt really nice but now im an adult going to coll .. i fear tat i cant be free wit mottai in coll and hence want to stop the trip .. pls give me some ideas on how to manage tis issue or is it really ok to be mottai ..
2010-12-02
#7
Name: kavitha rani Subject: hi swapna
this is kavitha, go ahead, all the best. iam going to headsave next month can u send me ur headsave photos and videos pls. pls encourage me
2010-10-26
#8
Name: Radha Subject: Good! Keep it up!
Dear Swaroopa, it is very nice to hear that you have tonsured along with your mother, father and brothers. It is much more nicer to hear that you enjoyed it. As one who has got tonsured thrice and looking forward to the fourth, I advice you not to cover your head while going to college. Some amount of teasing and booing may be there for a few minutes and that is that. You can enjoy the bald head thoroughly.
You say that you have decided to tonsure again after successfully completing your college. That will be about one and half years from now. By then you will have about 12 to 14 inches of hair - long enough to braid. Do not change your mind but keep up the promise. Wish you all the best.
2010-10-25
#9
Name: swaroopa Subject: done !!
hello frnds , on 23rd night we left by bus to tirupati and reached there by 230 , we started walking up from alipiri ... reached tirumala by 7 .. we had booked cottage before itself, so we went left our luggages had coffee and my mom was combing my to remove tangles meanwhile my father and my brothers went to chk out if there was any kalyanakata near by , after my finished combing i changed into pyjama and a top as my mom told me to get ready for tonsure .. at that time i was feeling really different , i just closed my eyes and said to myself its ok just do it uve come so far now no use running away .. gt ready and mean time by father and brothers came home and we went to the kalyanakatta .. we stood in line for collecting tockens for mottai .. after around 25 mins my dad took 5 tockens and we entered the hall , my dad and brothers went mens tonsure hall and me any my mom entered the kids and womens tonsure hall .. there were so many gals and ladies getting tonsure there and were going out happily by surrendering their hair , small gals cried , the atmosphere was full of divine pressure and a sense of satisfaction ... tats when i felt ntn to regret so smile nu , we went a stood in front of a female barber .. as there was one gal in front of us we were waiting for our turn meanwhile my mom asked me to wet my hair wit the water near by , so i wet my hair and after i stood up my mom was wetting , by tat time tats gals mottai was almost over .. i asked my mom if i cld go first cos i cldnt wait for long i wanted it done as fast as possible so she said ok go nu .. my turn came , i sat in front of the barber .. she pulled me towards her and asked me to bend my head and wet my hair again .. i bent and she asked me to say govinda govinda , i said and closed my .. she wet and changed the balde and started shaving at my centre of head and slowly moved towards forward , locks of hair kept falling down , i cld feel the breeze run over my head .. after a couple of mins she finished the left side and the bun fell .. i touched my hair and felt little bad , she continued and after some time she completely shaved and my mom asked her to do it again for a smooth finish .. after tat i gt up , my mom rubbed my mottai and said alaga erukkadi motta kutti nu she sat down for her mottai .. she also said govinda govinda nu got mottai adichufied in 5 mins .. my father and brothers were waiting outside for us , while coming out i gt shocked to see my brothers completely mottai and no moustache or beard , they looked so funny .. i was also teased , my dad kissed my mottai and said good tat u did it for god and we walked back to the cottage .. i went to the bathroom took bath and came out , was sitting in the hall and kept running my hands all over my head and kept smiling .. others also finished bathing and my mom applied sandal paste to my head , it felt so cool .. she also applied it over my dad and brothers head and then , my dad applied big namam over my brothers forehead and to himself .. we all went to have breakfast and joined the 300 rs ticket darshan , after 6 hrs we saw the mighthy venkateshwara for a couple of secs and came out of the temple ..
i really liked offering my hair to god , i dint go to coll today as i reached my place tis morning only , waiting for tomo .. ive also decided to tonsure my hair after completing my coll successfully .. thnk u for ur support !!
2010-10-23
#10
Name: Srinidhi Subject: Tonsure
Hi Swaroopa,
As your mother has taken a vow you will have to fullfill it at some point of time or the other. Since you are in your 2nd yr of degree, you would definitely be in a dilemma whether to shave your head or not. But the more you delay, the more you will be getting close to your other occasions in life like marraige. So i would suggest you to go for the head shave without thinking much, as by the time you are done with your degree, you will have a certain length of hair grown back. Regarding you going to college with a head shave, think positive, as you might be really happy after doing that with your new look.
Wish you good luck, and if you want more courage to go ahead with your head shave, please share your email id, and i will share more info with you.
2010-10-10
#11
Name: kajal Subject: don´ t reject
hi
prajna don' t reject the groom
u have not try short hair B4 that' s why u r fear about it when u shave and keep boy cut and get used to it u will not grow u r hair again. and will go bald not in 2 years but every year. yes head tonsure is really enjoyable. my sister in law have long hair and she is not ready to trim split hair she said i will keep ugly long hair but i will not cut it. but when my family go to tirupati and shave their head my sister in law said that she will tonsure her head in joking and not serious for it but my brother encourage her to do it and finally she ready for it and done it after that i have not see her in long hair. now she kept nice bob hairstyle . and don' t think about people you are tonsuring at balaji and its a sine of our tradition so u r not doing it for ' mod'
so best of luck and live happy marriage life
and if possible share your photo and videos of head shave with me
2010-10-09
#12
Name: Prajna Subject: Decided to take the plunge
I thank Srinidhi, Padmaja, Preeti and all others who have encouraged me.
Yesterday we - myself, mom, dad, Pranati (my younger sis) - visited the groom' s house. We talked some more on many issues in a cordial atmosphere. The family has many welcome values - respect God, love family values, have adopted some poor households for educating the kids, do regular community work in a small and silent way, all the family members do regular yoga and meditation, highly nationalistic. On the other hand they have also some Western values - craze for wealth, mod looks and occasional indulgence in alcohol. The last one is a bit scary for me. When I expressed my apprehension, the groom' s mother put me at ease by saying they indulge in it in strict limits. They are going to appoint me as Special Officer, with salary, in their granite company, as understudy to the current GM. I will take over in two years after he retires. The lady has suggested that I can give away all my salary to my parents since I do not have brothers. They can also live very nearby so that I can look after them when required.
The groom has accepted my suggestion to keep his face clean shaved (i.e.without his french beard and moustache - I do not like facial hair, including moustache, on men) and if I marry him.
My mom has suggested that the family appears good and I better accept them. When you get something you may have to lose something. Loss of long hair is too unimportant when weighed against such a nice and rich family. Being rich, an occasional indulgence in alcohol in limits is generally the norm and I should not worry too much about it.
Considering all things, I have conveyed my acceptance today, though with some nervousness.
Based on this, some more decisions have been taken. The engagement - a small, private affair - will be on 13th. The marriage will be in end Feb. Our parents will take me Tirupati on 23rd and get me fully tonsured and again 20th November for a second tonsure. My next haircut will be after marriage and before reception. I will be resigning in early Nov and join the groom' s company in early Feb.
So it is ' bye bye long hair' for me and I think forever. More after my tonsure.
2010-12-02
#13
Name: kavitha rani Subject: hi prajna
this is kavitha, iam going to headsave next month can u send me ur headsave photos and videos pls. pls encourage me
2010-10-10
#14
Name: Srinidhi Subject: Nice to hear about your decision
Hi Prajna,
Its really nice to hear that you have taken a positive decision about your marraige proposal. Reading your message, i feel that you will be stepping in to a family that has great values and tradition. Also your decision to shave your head in Tiruapthi on the 23rd sounds good as you will be offering your hair to Lord Vekateshwara before stepping into a new phase of your life. God will surely bless you with a life filled with joy and happiness.
Hope you will really enjoy the experience of shaving your head in Tiruapthi. Also i think you are planning to shave your head twice before your marraige, so you will surely enjoy the experience for the second time too, and i hope you will be looking great in your new look.
I hope to hear from you after you head shave in Tiruapthi, and i wish you all the best and a life filled with lots of love and happiness after your marraige.
2010-10-01
#15
Name: Preeti Subject: Go ahead!
Hi Prajna,
I am Preeti. I am known in my Bank as ' boycut' Preeti. Two years ago I had long hair. But I got tonsured in 2008 and again in 2009. In between I kept my hair a boycut with clippers - like military cut. See my postings.
A boy cut is really enjoyable. Especially with manual or electric clippers. So do not worry. Go ahead. Agree for the marriage and be a ' boycut' lady all your life. As for tonsure once in two years - wow, it will be really nice.
As for your last question, I was bald twice and I could successfully face the colleagues and customers. You will also be able to do it.
As for your question no 3, you can be one of the first persons. Why not!
2010-09-30
#16
Name: Srinidhi Subject: hi Prajna
Dear Prajna,
I am glad to hear that you feel encouraged reading my replies.
If you are interested to know more about me, please let me know your email id and i will write to you about me,my qualities etc. Don' t mind , but i don' t want to share more personal info on the forum.
2010-09-30
#17
Name: aakash s Subject: hi
hi...........first i say that tonsuring is a grat experience,,, for a man or women ,it will be nice for bald ever,,,,, then u r in US right?? there its not a problem ,u can do tonsuring and hav bob cut... a girl with bobcut will look so courage,modern and bold enough,but first night with both bald is somewat not nice but as ur husband like that accept it,,, it will be nice.... try to find he is good man...all the best mam
2010-09-30
#18
Name: Padmaja Subject: It is your decision that counts
Hi Prajna,
I have read your posting and I agree with what ' Srinidhi' said.
It is entirely your decision to marry into this family or not.
You sit and think, wether you would like to shave your head on a regular basis.
Happiness is not in trying to change yourself for others.
How long can you be happy always sacrificing his/her likes , dislikes and adjusting for the likes and dislikes for the other person one is marrying?
Marriage is a lifelong commitment.
Cause this is not a stupid movie which ends in 3 hours nor a saree or dress which you dont like, or can wear it for once and throw it. This is marriage your marriage.
In a marital relationship ' Give and take' should be both ways, not one way.
You said you are a working women.
So think for yourself. How independent are you? Can you keep up with these demands?
It defeinetely sounds odd about first nigh with shaved head.
Its entirely your decision to say Yes or No to this marriage proposal.
Wish you all the best.
2010-09-28
#19
Name: dyumna Subject: hai
yes, you can accept this proposal, it would be easy and convenient for you to maintain a short hair, tonsuring is really enjoyableonce if you have it, you will like it, initially people would be teasing but don' t mind them
2010-09-28
#20
Name: Srinidhi Subject: My Suggestions
Hi Prajna,
After reading you post i felt like giving you the following suggestions.
1. Whether to accept the proposal or not all depends on you, if you feel you can keep up with what the family is asking for and if you think the person is a good choice for you, give it a yes. Its only you that can decide as its your life and you met him personally.
2. Its always ok to have short hair after marraige. It only depends on whether you like your look or not. Most of the educated people these days sport short hair after marraige. And usually women look cute with a boy cut. So, it all depends on how you like it.
3. Regarding your Suhaag Raat' with a shave head, this definitely sounds peculiar and strange for people who are not aware of some men having a liking for a shaved head. You can find several articles and videos on the internet.
4. Head shaving is a nice experience. I myself get mine shaved once in a few yrs when i visit Tirupathi. Not sure if you ever got your head shaved during your childhood. Once you experience you might know the feeling.
5. Regarding the reaction of people to a bald girl in work atmosphere, you might find people staring at you for the first few days, but i would say if you start thinking of what others would think, you would only get yourself into a dilemma.
If you think the family is really worth and you would be happy after marraige, keep aside the short hair and head shave concern. One more thing i would like to make a point is, since the family is getting their heads shaved in Tirupathi once in 2 years, it does sound traditional, as they respect god.
Whatever be your decision, it is you who is most important to lead a happy and peaceful life after marraige. So i wish you a Good Luck and a Bright Future ahead.
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please send your photos or videos
Congrats and Good Luck Prajna
Baldi in MNC office
Head Shave at Tirupati
tonsure !!
Name: kavitha rani
Nice to hear about your decision
Go ahead!
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