I wasn' t sure where to post this kind of a question so I chose this message board. I need some desperate suggestions. My son is 27 months old. He has always been a happy and cheerful child. But lately he has become very aggressive. I usually try not to fulfill his demands especially if he is being stubborn or crying for it. But he will shout and scream if we don' t give him something he wants. Or just cry. I try to distract him and sometimes that will work. Whats more concerning to me though is that he gets very angry at times and sometimes he will look directly at me and shout ' no' very intently. I am a very loving parent so I feel very hurt when his anger is directed towards me like that. I live in the US and work full time. He used to stay with a baby sitter while I worked. Recently my inlaws visited us for 6 months and he got pretty spoilt in their care. After they left which is about 2 weeks ago, I put him in a day care. He is pretty quite and disciplined there. Normally he is a very happy and cheeful kid. Socially adapts himself and very friendly. But at home he is assertive and getting very demanding. Sometimes at public places he will lie down on the floor if we don' t give him something he wants which is very embarrassing. I am very concerned about his behaviour. I just wanted to check if this is a normal behavior for a two year old. I am afraid if he will turn out to be a short-tempered and aggressive adult. How can I make him to be more patient and less demanding. If anybody has similar kids, please share.
deepa replied. hi prity,
I have a daughter, she' s 25 months old, and she too shows all the tantrums and assertiveness that your son show too.. She also can say \" no\" with a lot of assertion. She used to show these tantrums even before she turned 1 year, her favorite used to be banging her head, this stopped around 16 months of age, and now the temper has come back again since she turned two. What I have found and works a lot for me are:
1. It is usually the phase..The terrible twos are bound to be hard..just have a lot of patience and you should be able to manage it
2. usually the tantrums come when they think we don' t understand what they say..When he tells/asks you something, even if you don' t want to give him that, repeat the question to him, so he knows you understood him, then distract him with other options.
3. If he gets really fussy, point to something and make a story of it with all kinds of sound effects and that should end the tantrums..works for me!
4. give him a timeout when he really is unmanageable. Make him sit in a corner for 1-2 minutes. leave the room, if he comes behind you, quietly put him back in the corner and tell him you are disappointed with his behaviour..Wait 2 minutes and then go into the room, hug him and tell him why you gave him the timeout. He should have forgotten the reason for his tantrum by that time.
5 important thing to remember is if he is making a tantrum for something which you think he should not be getting, don' t give in..look for why he might be fussy, he could be hungry, sleepy, tired or just wanting attention. ALso since they are alraedy talking at this age, they seem to think we should understand all their baby language and when we don' t, that frustrates them.

Also since his grandparents were here and he was used to getting what he wanted, it is very natural for him to show tantrums very frequently, now that they have gone back. Just have patience, talk and play with him after you come back from work and before starting the cooking and all for the day, have some quiet time with him everyday and be firm when you have to..
Hope these help. Good luck and lots of luv to your little one..
deepa