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Extra-marital Affairs > To everyone of you in this forum
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Name: meds
Subject:  bravo!
Date: 2009-11-15
Hahaha....looks like madhavi has given a quality tongue lashing to all the cheaters...you are spot on with some of your comments...like other cheaters being more tolerant of cheaters.
however i dont agree with the unnecessary outburst against advise. i give suggestions only because i strongly believe in them. and a few other people may be of that type..just cut that part out and your message is close to perfect.
anyway i would not advise madhavi or anyone bothring too much about others.i just don't want to see good people get hurt because of a errrant spouse.if these cheaters can hurt bad people or other cheaters then who cares???
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Name: wellwisher
Subject:  also..
Date: 2009-11-16
I am sure madhavi must be laughing her way as all take time to reply to this posts wasting our time.though most have agreed to what she has written.don´ t seem to follow.we sit here and reply to these.
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Name: wellwisher
Subject: bravo
Date: 2009-11-16
bravo meds and yam.you have a point here
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Name: yam
Subject:  question
Date: 2009-11-08
why critisize people who are genuinely give advises.
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Name: Jothi
Subject:  Hi PP
Date: 2009-11-06
One last msg before I get out of this forum.I wish I should not have known the concept of EMA.But having experiencing this crisis called EMA as a victim, i have learnt a lot.There are different types of EMA in which adultery is one of the category.Definitely for me and my H adultery is not the catgory of EMA we are facing and he is not a PHILANDERER.I cant allow anyone to demean my H just because I am the victim here.Mine is a crisis in Marriage and its all about how to restore and save my marriage.The people once who were in Affair,when they get out of it completely then they are also victims.even Emotional infidelity is a crisis in marriage and it is much more stronger than what you call the EMA as adultery.As long as the experience hanuts anyone one one will be really able to comprehend the term EMA.i am not supporting any type of EMA here,but rather than looking at a narrower perspective it is one of the crisis in life like financial crisis or emotional crisis.I would like to leave one last reuqistion to the people who are seeking EMA through this site.Please do not adulterate this forum by seeking solutions in different way(that is i have invloved in EMA and I am not able to come out of it.Whats the solution?).The solution is within urself and get the hell out of it and save your life and save the loved ones life.Good Bye And Take CAre all
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Name: Jothi
Subject: Really Sad
Date: 2009-11-04
Hi all
With my traumized mind I came into this forum to let someone help me to give courage and strength to go through this tough situation.When I found a more generalized opinion about this EMA,i thought extending myself to share my personal thing has only furthur hurt me and not did naything good to me.I think I can deal well myself now and i am deleting all my posts in the forum that i used before.
Madhavi,being philanthropic has nothing to do with the flaws in your personal life or being ethical.I think you got badly offended by no of other posts who are persons seeking for EMA.
The victim of EMA's situation is like this.Imagine a ocean and there you are travelling with a person who you like so much and have so much failth on that person that he will take you to the shore(you dont know swimming and you trust this person compeltely).Suddenly the person whom you had faith has pushed you inside the ocean and you hang in their by holiding the rim of the boat bu that person is not either helping you to get inside the boat or taking you hands off so that I can drown in the ocean.
I refers here me
The other person is the spouse.
Boat is the marriagee
Any forum is intended for people who are in help but when it is misused,i think it is better to stay away.I will never ever get into this forum again.
Thanks for all who supported me BOB,HBT and counselor.
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Name: pp
Subject: why is it misunderstood
Date: 2009-11-05
I fail to understand how come madhavi´ s message has not been understood in the right sense.As far as my knowledge is concerned THE MESSAGE IS IN REFERENCE TO PEOPLE WHO DELIBERATELY MADE THE CHOICE OF HAVING AN EMA AND IT IS NOT IN REFERENCE TO THE VICTIMS OF AN EMA.When she says why marry when people cannot withstand temptations like a physical relation ,its purely related to the posts in which they ask shall I have sex with him for the last time or a 100th time.I´ m sorry to say this as I´ m no one to comment on such sensitive isssues and I do believe that this forum is meant for evryone.
What I meant to say is jothi is not at all related in this whole argument.She is a victim seeking guidance to solve her problem with her husband who has deliberately opted for an EMA and this message is very much related to him and not to jothi.
And according to what the counsellor says that an EMA is the result of a poor marriage or its just an accident,we need to think if he´ s really supporting the victims or the persons making their spouses, victims.
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Name: Counselor
Subject: This forum can still serve its purpose
Date: 2009-11-04
Noone can disagree that this forum is abused by a class of users. Every society has miscreants, but a society fails not by the callous acts of the miscreants but by the wrong or absent reactions by the large majority of the benign people.
Madhavi's message is understandably against the miscreants but it carries an undertone that everyone here are looking for EMA. This is wrong and I must object to that.
ALLOW THIS FORUM TO SERVE THE NEEDY.
and ignore those who are abusing the place. If the large majority do not react, the miscreants will get tired and leave the place for us.
People here leave for other forums which serve a better purpose. Follow Jothis case and where she is posting now, you will know why this forum fails to serve its purpose.
Its unfortunate that my earlier post was completely misconstrued by the so called good people in this forum. Even that amounts to abuse of the forum!
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Name: da
Subject:  Perfect post
Date: 2009-11-03
All these days while reading such posts ... i used to wonder .. how useless one can get that he/she can write such non issues as issues. Look at the world .. there are so many "real" problems that such lust "issues" sound such waste of life .. Goshh ... kudos to Madhavi.. since i cd never find the write wrds to such sick people ..
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Name: Hi
Subject: Your thoughts
Date: 2009-11-04
Madhavi,first of all I do agree with you.there are greater problems in this world.But you are underestimating all other problems.This is your own thought process as someone here said.dd,what could be non issues to you could be issues to others.Everyone has their own issues.I agree world has real problems.But this forum is supposed to help support people.Unfortunately people misuse it to get into many relationships.Also we have many hypocrites who themselves could in some affairs and write great messages.I am not perfect either.and for some it is a medium of personal outbursts someone here calling personal issues as non issues and calling Feelings and emotions which are not sync is an issue.Grow up people.Learn to honor people feelings and emotions too.It is indeed a great post but sick people misuse this forum.
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Name: Counselor
Subject:  you just can not wish away´ EMA from society
Date: 2009-11-03
EMA's might be choices of the persons who are in the affair. It could have been by an accident, an affair might have been an ill effect of a poor marriage. But irespective of WHY EMAs in societies are as old as marriages are and just few Madhavi's can not wish them away!
The ill effects of the EMAs are suffered by not just by the spouse or children but by the society at large. Madhavi appears to be thinking that this site is visited on by those who have as affair, I would urge please read posts by Jothi, who is a vicim of an affair. Those who help persons like Jothi could either be another betrayed spouse or an earlier waywards spouse. Irespective of who helps as long as the help is in the right direction, no one has a business to grudge.
Why is Madhavi here? Particularly with her thoughts? YES, Madhavi should not write here again. Let the above be her last post. The world would not loose an iota. However I do wish that Madhavi or any of her loved ones never become a victim of an EMA of their close ones.
If Madhavi comes back to this site on that day, I would be glad to help her then.
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Name: pp
Subject: please don´ t misguide
Date: 2009-11-03
The effects of an EMA are better known when somebody experiences it.Specially when the problem is from the victim´ s side.A person who´ s in an EMA understands the pain of being cheated when his/her spouse gets into an EMA.
And when the couselor says that an EMA sprungs out of poor relations in marriage,I´ m sorry,it´ s not the case in most of the posts here in.
Though we cannot judge or change one´ s way of thinking ,one should atleast tell what´ s wrong is wrong.I can´ t help but pity the ladies who are invited by more and more persons for an EMA,pleading them to respond.They are no more considered as respectable and homely persons.I´ m sorry if this has hurt anybody´ s feelings.Reality bites.But I deeply feel for those ladies.Please come out of the mess you have created for yourself .You still have got some useful things to do on earth.
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Name: Jaya Vaddi
Subject: Counselor
Date: 2009-11-03
Counselor, dont giv e lame excuses.
Just because you name is counselor, we are not going to trust that you are one.
You seem to be enjoying this board quite a lot. Concentrate more on your home...you will get some shock any day. Your spouse is waiting for YOU, I hope and wish.
When someone says something good, let us learn to accept it rather than wishing them some problems.
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Name: Jaya Vaddi
Subject: I agree
Date: 2009-11-03
I agree fully with Madhavi. These people show how desperate they are and have toomuch time and too little morals in life. They have no control of their life. Before jumping on the bed, they should develop this control as these are ADULTS.
Marriage has become a joke and commitment no value.
Ignore this counselor...he seems to be an equally mad guy...wonder what kinda counselling he does to his clients or does he sleep with them too? What say counseller
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Name: Sanjay
Subject: Hi
Date: 2009-11-03
Take a Bow lady!!Take a bow!
What a message to all dudes and ladies wasting their life,time in making EMA in the name of being a friend!advisor!
Does it make any sense dudes and ladies?
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Name: pp
Subject: true
Date: 2009-11-02
But nobody's perfect.Everyone has some kind of weakness in their minds which makes their character or living go awry.Neverthless,I completely agree that going to the level of having an EMA ,is not something unavoidable or not something which happens without our senses in place.It depends on the person what he or she choses to have.And once made the choice one cannot go back ,and need to face the consequences .And The consequences are such that one may need to pay a life for what they got into.
But what's more pathetic is that,when they are trying to know the pros and cons of a situation ,there are some other people around trying to take advantage of their situation.People who are in an EMA are thinking they are just talking about a liberal topic,but some bad minds are actually working to get into the scene ,only to carry the EMA to the next level but not to get into a fair discussion.
Hope such messages work as an eye opener to everyone who is thinking of an EMA or who's almost ready to jump into an EMA.
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REPLY LIST
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Last 7 Posts of this Board 
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BRINGING HIM BACK
hi,i dont know how to start the conversation regarding this matter but i wanna say u this,see at present u can only do is just keep him loving and dont give chances for queralls etc etc,one day will come where hre recognices ur love and true relationship mean while dont be passive in this matter try to discover new ways to attract him like sexual matters,good interaction s... - PANDU [View Message]
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go ahead
have some little fun..with safety measures on...its ok to get attracted ... - avantika [View Message]
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hi
just go ahead and have a blast... - avani [View Message]
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u r very lucky
u r a casa nova..women are after u
have fun till it lasts taking the precautions
enjoy... - avantika [View Message]
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Tell us more...
Dear susu,
Please tell us more about your H' s affair. How and when did they meet originally? Colleague? Where do they meet? How did you discover? Do you know this young girl? Does she know what your H thinks about the relationship? meaning only for pleasure and not for marriage ever etc? What exactly do you mean by " he became impotent from this period" ?... - Bob [View Message]
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living to have more then more is bad
hi andy my self is vamsee,see i to also loved a girl where i loved her without knowing her status ie married r un married but after a few months she had started to dought me and finally had left me and just said i like my family and my husband ,few days back that is at starting of our relation she had said that she was divorced and never like to meet her husband r like to ... - pandu [View Message]
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it is not that easy!!!!!!!!
hi andy,
i am in the similar situation like u.
i am having an a affair for more than a year now and we are married and have kids. there is indeed something missing in our marriges. it is just not the pysical relationship, it is a bonding too. we think about this every second in a day. what we are doing is wrong but as u said " we have no control over it" . so far ... - nina [View Message]
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