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 Views on Article - Touching Feet Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 12: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. I am blessed by your message. It reminds me my responsibilities. Since the message is from you, I will have ultimate devotion for it and I will follow it. In fact I was spending too much of time chating with my "Would be". Your MIL must be liking you so much. I really cannot understand that you are TRYING to find the answer for MANU's question. I will wait and read your post to him. AKKA just one question only if you find time. Why was your marriage fixed when you were still studying? If the question is wrong, forgive me. With pranams at your divine feet, Chetana 10th Feb 2012 12:28 AM (Midnight) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 8: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. Thank you for your concern about my health. I will discuss about all your doubts and 100+ questions after my delivery. I appreciate your attitude of following the QUE. I am actually waiting for Varalaxmi’s post so that I can post for Prober and her together. I am still trying my best to find an answer for the Most Important Question of MANU. I will definitely answer both of them before I stop posting here in a few days. If there are any emergencies, and if anything is pending, I will post here with the help of my Co-sister or MIL. You have asked for a MESSAGE. Message for you is “Concentrate and Study Well for your 8th Semester. Your Score in 8th Semester Should Not be AFFECTED due to your Engagement.” I want share something from my own experience. My MIL specifically monitored my progress and encouraged me to focus on studies even before the engagement (immediately after formally SEEING the BRIDE). She regularly kept in touch over phone (coin Box of our hostel), made multiple visits –almost once in a week (she never visited hostel to meet my SIL earlier), continuously advised my DH and myself to focus on the objective etc. In general all these are very important especially if your marriage is fixed when you are still a student. Some elders should constantly monitor the youngsters if they are still studying. In my opinion, this should be your immediate focus. Take the help of your father & brother if needed. ALL the BEST. –Anu 9th Feb 2011 (9:00 PM) Name: Debashis Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, Once again thanks for your clarifications. Don't you think spiritual knowledge (such as what you owe) deserve respect (I mean not the respect that you explained, but the highest form of respect like offering pranam at your feet)? I just thought that by offering pranam i can be guided properly with your thoughts and your preachings may reach my mind. I hope you are not offended once again. Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 11: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. Sorry, My latest post is supposed to be labeled "CA 10". But there are two "CA 9" due to copy paste.. Sorry that I did not check for your reply earlier. I was talking too much with my "would be". My engagement may be held in Few days after deciding auspicious time according to horoscopes of my Would be and mine. Our priest will tell tomorrow. I do not know how WIN-WIN can be arrived at in my problem (even theoretically). Please don't answer that NOW. Please have sufficient rest. I understood the EIR rule between SILS but not the reasoning. Again AKKA Please after SOME months when you come back. I have at least 100 questions but all after you come back. Please have good rest NOW AKKA. If your rest is not affected, BLESS ME with a MESSAGE (I must thank VANI for this request). Also Bless me in advance for my engagement. Again I should be fair to request that I need to wait in QUE for my MESSAGE as Manoj, Prober etc. are ahead of me. With pranams at your divine feet, Chetana 8th Feb 2012 1:37 AM (Midnight) Name: Debashis Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, Your explanation was very lucid and insightful. It has very clearly answered a lot of questions going on in my mind. However by knowledge I had meant spiritual knowledge and not education as such. I do not have much time now due to work pressure. Best of Luck for your delivery. May God bless you. Will write later. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: ADB 4: Dear Debashis Chacha, Continuing… Point 3. About EIK you have mentioned in your post- Lord Rama was certainly Elder in Knowledge to Dasharatha, Kousalya, Sumitra and Kaikeyi, as he happened to be incarnation of Lord Vishnu. What I humbly want to put across is EIK is not the criteria for receiving Pranams. If a mother is ILLITERATE (or educated up to say Degree) and her Son or daughter complete their Doctorate (Ph.D.), What has to be done ? Should the mother offer Pranams to the feet of her children considering them as Elder In Knowledge or BLESS them to achieve newer HEIGHTS in Life and Career ? Please reply. –Anu 6th Feb 2012 (12:50 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: ADB 3: Dear Debashis Chacha, Continuing… Point 2. Please don’t feel sad also. I have very humbly put across my point of view. With all humility and humbleness, I accept the “RESPECT” offered by any elderly person. I very humbly feel that “Respect” and “Pranams to feet” cannot be related one-to-one. Two people who meet on a road can greet each other with folded hands and a “Namaste”. They have mutual respect to each other. “Respect” has to be always mutual. Pranams to the feet of a person is not mutual. One offers the Pranams and the other blesses him or her after receiving the same. For example, my husband and myself have mutual respect for each other, but I always bow down to his feet. You may have respect towards all of your colleagues, but may not offer Pranams to all their feet. I have only stated different acceptable situations for receiving Pranams from a person in our tradition & culture. If anybody (including you) satisfies any of those situations, I CANNOT REFUSE THEIR PRANAMS. Please refer my post addressed to “jayanthy” dated 7th Apr 2011 (7:38 PM). I have mentioned there that “NAMASKARA” has many dimensions. Similarly, “RESPECT” also has many dimensions. I do not have time now to discuss the different DIMENSIONS as I am counting days for my delivery (Lots of posts needed for discussion in detail). I will definitely do once I come back. Once again, - I CANNOT REFUSE ANY ELDERLY PERSON’S (INCLUDING YOURS) PRANAMS IF THE SITUATION IS APPROPRIATE FOR THE SAME. REFUSING SO IN RIGHT SITUATIONS IS CONSIDERED INAUSPICIOUS. AT THE SAME TIME RECEIVING PRANAMS FROM AN ELDERLY PERSON WITHOUT APPROPRIATE SITUATION ENDORSED BY OUR CULTURE IS ALSO CONSIDERED INAUSPICIOUS. Some times the situation makes one helpless. LORD Krishna was helpless in many situations. For Example, he was helpless towards the demand of Yashoda and he had to postpone her wish to next birth. He took birth as her own SON in his next birth… Lord RAMA was similarly helpless in many situations. That is why I humbly wished that I may be your daughter or grand daughter in one of my next births. Will Continue… Anu 6th Feb 2012 (12:25 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: ADB 2: Dear Debashis Chacha, I will address all the points mentioned in your latest post (not labeled or dated). You have not numbered them. But I am doing it myself. Point 1. Please don’t feel SORRY that you disturbed me by offering Pranams to my feet. I am NOT disturbed. In fact I am quite used to receive Pranams from Elders. Please refer to my post labeled “SDK 1” dated 25th Apr 2011 (3:30 PM). (there is one more post wrongly labeled as “SDK1” immediately after that but dated 26th April 2011) During DASARA festival, with Great difficulty we manage to cut down the number of Sumangali Poojas to around 35 (Many times it would be much more- we really do not keep a track). As I explained in that post, all people of the house including Senior most, offer Pranams to the feet of all Sumangalis whose Padapooja is done in their house. Padapooja is actually done by Some (or ALL) Sumangalis of that house; but it is mandatory for all the people of the house to do Pranams to the feet of Sumangalis who are invited for Padapooja. As I mentioned in that post, I was not comfortable in the beginning because I was the only YOUNG Sumangali and all others receiving Padapooja are ELDER (Quite Senior) Sumangalis. How long can I be uncomfortable ? Within 2 to 3 Such Sumangali Poojas, I got used to it. Even before that I received Padapooja from few young brides as a part of rituals in connection with their marriage. Will Continue… -Anu 6th Feb 2012 (12:05 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 7: About your point No. 6- I have explained it already to Rani on 21st Mar 2011 (12:20 AM) (MIDNIGHT !!). Please go thro’ the same. It seems from your narration that the practices for EIR are similar between your family and our family. I will clarify further with the example within our family. My SIL is PRABHA and my Co-Sister is Usha (Names changed). For Prabha, both ANU and USHA are wives of elder brothers. Since my marriage was earlier to Prabha’s marriage, I am considered Elder to her. Since Prabha’s Marriage was earlier to Usha’s marriage, Prabha is considered Elder to Usha. Do not worry about who among you (your Elder brother’s wife and yourself) will be Elder in Relation. Maintain a cordial relation with your elder brother’s wife. If both of you are really very close, you will not have any problems. ALL the best once again. –Please post here if you have any emergency. I may not be able to sit and work on a PC after few days. Anu 06th Feb 2012 (11:15 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 6: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR BROTHER’S MARRIAGE, YOUR MARRIAGE AND YOUR 8TH SEM ENGG. I really do not keep record of the problems for which people approach me, or the number of problems. Some of very close family friends, my Co-sister and SIL try keeping a track. SDK would have collected information from the homes of Saroja Aunty or Meena Aunty with whom she has some contacts as stated by her. I do not know if she has any additional contacts with families very close to our family. There are many more ISSUES, which are very personal and NOBODY except the person who approached me, the person / family introducing that person and myself knows them. The number is not important. I do not consider a higher NUMBER as any kind of achievement. This sort of unofficial consultancy/ counseling started long back (even before that Pravachana), initially with interpretations related to our traditions and practices, but later got extended to ALL AREAS OF LIFE. To put it in a simple way, most of the problems are caused due to the COMMUNICATION gap between the parties involved. EGO, GREED, JEALOUSLY, Some Old practices of our culture (in some families), which present generation considers as embarrassing and humiliating etc. are also the causes of PROBLEMS. Many times it is due to generation gap. As I mentioned earlier, it is not the QUANTITY of the problems, which is important. It is the QUALITY of solution arrived at, which is significant. I mean if I am able to convince both sides for a WIN-WIN. That way I have the satisfaction that most of the cases ended with WIN-WIN outcome. Unfortunately, I could not try it in your case - Of course the participation of your uncle and aunt in the discussion is essential if we have to try a WIN-WIN. (IN SOME CASES WIN-WIN IS SUCCESSFULLY ACHIEVED WITH ONLY ONE PARTY DISCUSSING WITH ME. THE DISCUSSION WOULD BE LENGTHY…I HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEMS, EXPECTATIONS OF DIFFERENT PEOPLE INVOLVED AND SO MANY OTHER FACTORS. BUT IN YOUR CASE IT MAY NOT BE POSSIBLE WITHOUT YOUR UNCLE AND AUNT INVOLVING IN DISCUSSION). Will Continue… -Anu 06th Feb 2012 10:10 AM Name: Anant Country: India Comment: AAA 1: ANU AKKA, I am placing my head at your feet with ultimate devotion. (1)I too wish to learn Vedas, Upanishads and all sacred Hindu scriptures at your feet like Sanjay. If there is any problem for you, kindly help me to reach your Guruji. (2)In my humble opinion, you should accept the offer of your personal blog built by the boy of your close circle. You have written it in your post to "HUMBLE" on 27th April 2011. This "VIEWS PAGE" is almost like your personal Blog with Majority of "VALUE" content written by you. Then Why not Personal Blog? The content of this Web Page is of IMMENSE VALUE, but unfortunately there is no scope for editing (Spellings & Grammar), no scope for formatting text for better effect, no scope for photos and videos etc. This is my humble request AKKA. Please correct me if I am wrong in my opinion. (3) I agree with Prober (PAA 7). People should post here or in any open forum so that millions are benefited over a period of time instead of mailing you. You are solving the problem of the few, but in that process you are enlightening thousands immediately and millions in long run. I am guessing that you must have received hundreds of mails and replied to them after disclosing your email id here. I request you to post all of them here for enlightenment of all people. I also request you to post the problems you have solved (initially posted by SDK, later referred by Chetana in CA 9). This because for solving any problems, you would have given them wonderfully enlightening analysis & examples and reference from our sacred scriptures. (4) How can you SEE more AKKA. Everyone knows about Ramayana, situation at the time around Ashwamedha Yaga etc. But It is only you who can pick the appropriate message for the society. I observe similar GENIUS in you in most of the examples you have given here. How is it possible for you? Please reply only if your health permits. I am ready to wait any length of time for your Blessings. Pranams again to your ENLIGHTENING feet. -ANANT 5th Feb 2012 14:55 Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 11: Dear Anu AKKA, My humble Pranams at your feet. I don't know if you are physically fit enough to post something. I have been waiting for your forgiveness with guilty feeling. If you check here and feel that I am deserving enough for your Blessings, please write one word that you have forgiven me. I will wait for some months for detailed reply. Prober 3rd Feb 2012 12:54 AM Name: Saroja and VIkas Country: India Comment: SV1: Dear ANU AKKA, Our humble Namaskaras at your divine feet. Reading each of your posts is a new experience. How much and what all you read? Our grandparents tell that you are carrying the enlightenment from your previous birth; otherwise it is impossible for any human to have this kind of enlightenment in a single birth at this age. What do you feel. Thank you wery much AKKA. We are strictly abstaining. Everyday we imagine your feet in mind do Namaskaras after our Pooja. We were worried that our question has disturbed or embarrassed you and hence you are not appearing in this forum. We felt so bad. Thanks a lot that we got a great relief. We request you not to reply to this post. We have hundreds of questions to put across and we will do it after some months by email or posting. SPECIAL THANKS TO SRINI. Once again our Namaskaras to your divine feet. 29th Jan 2012 10:10 PM Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 12: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Waiting humbly with all devotion for your ASHIRVADS AKKA. After reading Chetana Didi's posts and your reply, I feel that the real REVOLUTION would happen if my mother participates in my marriage with my father's portrait alongside. She should be doing both the roles of my father and mother. If LORD RAMA being a WIDOWER can alone complete a great sacred work like Yaga, keeping Seeta's IDOL alongside him, Why shouldn't a Widow be allowed to take ACTIVE part in a sacred work like marriage? I NEED YOUR FULL SUPPORT FOR THAT. I will be very happy if you conduct such marriage as a PRIEST. Many females are conducting sacred works like HOMA, marriage etc. now a days. Your little brother MANU 29th Jan 2012 3:30 PM Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 9: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. All of us are totally satisfied from your suggestions AKKA. My brother agreed for marriage and we will start the search from Sunday (It is already Sunday now). I cannot believe that a human aged 27 years to be as knowledgeable as you, yet so simple and so humble. I have no words to thank you. I now understand why people like you so much. You are a perfect blend of Old Traditions and Modern Outlook. You interpret Old traditions' true meanings and spirit and take both the generations into confidence. Today the boy's side has given green signal about horoscope. I am guessing that the boy's family has a remote contact with you from a conversation I had with the boy some days back. That is why I mentioned that I will take BLESSINGS from you PERSONALLY in one of my earlier posts. If it happens in my marriage, it will be a great moment of my life. SDK posted that you have solved more than 200 problems on 1st April 2011. She has not put date / time. one of your posts prior to that is dated 1st April and one of Sanjay's post after that is dated 1st April. Is it just more than 200 problems? I guess it should be much more considering your posts here. Please tell me what types of problems people approach you with? My 6th point is also pending. Please have sufficient rest AKKA. Please reply only if time is available or you can answer me after some months. With pranams at your divine feet, Chetana 29th Jan 2012 1:17 AM (Midnight) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 5: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. Sorry that I did not reply earlier in the day as we had some guests and there was a power cut for 3 hours. Good that you have posted your reply with some points, which are numbered. It makes my job easier. Now I am replying you all your points in the same order. 1. Since you are residing in Bangalore, I hope you know Kannada well (In Case I have to give some examples, I can choose from Kannada – easier for me). Please confirm. 2. I know that 26 years for boys is slightly early for marriage, according to present day urban standards; but not too early. Isn’t 21 a bit early for girls as well ? My first salary was Rs. 15000/- per month. My husband’s salary was around 25000/- per month when we started our loving in the midst of my 5th Sem Engg. What I mean is he was ready to marry me at the same instant if there was no other alternative – In fact that was the FIRST question put by me in the presence of my SIL who was laughing and enjoying her brother’s face turning red with shyness. Of course the value of money was different then. I feel that 26000/- per month is a reasonably OK salary to search for an alliance, considering present day expenditures incurred by a middle class family in Bangalore. This is a different circumstance. Do you think that your family would have found an alliance for you now itself, if your mother were to be alive ? 3. If your brother marries now, he can shield YOU from doing Padapooja to your uncle and aunt. But if you marry now, you cannot shield HIM from doing Padapooja to your uncle and aunt. Your husband and YOU cannot take the role of parents of your Elder brother in his marriage. One more important fact is, it is difficult for you to put across your problems to groom’s side since you are bride’s side; But in case of your brother’s marriage, you will be the groom’s side and hence it will not be difficult to talk to them (Or it may not be necessary to talk to them either) about choosing some of your mother’s side relatives to act as Groom’s parents. Your uncle and aunt (or other relatives) cannot create any scene in your brother’s marriage. They can create a scene in your marriage. 4. It depends on how seriously you try. If your mother expired in August 2011, it is still not too late. If you try with all seriousness, you should be able to find a suitable girl in 2 to 3 months and then also there would be good time left for marriage within August (If you follow any Indian Calendar for the purpose of calculating One year also, you will have enough time). You will have to somehow convince your groom’s side to hold your marriage till completion of your 8th Sem Exams (After your brother’s marriage to put it the other way). Mostly your college is affiliated to VTU Karnataka and the even Sem Engg. is starting on 1st Feb 2012. 5. If you finish both marriages within one year, as per my suggestions above, all the required goals will be achieved. i.e. 1) Shubhakarya within an year of your mother’s death, 2) Share of Punya from Kanyadan to your Late mother, 3) both your brother and you avoiding the Padapooja to your uncle and aunt. I will answer your 6th point later as I feel that it is not an emergency. (I will do it before I proceed for delivery) Over to you for discussions with your father and brother. Please let me know your decisions at the earliest. -Anu 28th Jan 2012 (11:22 PM) Name: Debashis Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, Thanks for your reply. I don't think we have to be so concerned about this "Elder in Age" (EIA) or "Elder in Relationship" (EIR). There is one more thing - "Elder in Knowledge" (EIK). So in those terms I can easily tell that you are way ahead of me (all of us). That's why I offered pranams at your divine feet. I don't think you need to be elder, you need to be a Sumangali or you need to be a teacher or receive Sanyas to get respect from others! I think your immense knowledge is sufficient. I'm really sad that you are not willing to accept my respect. And sorry if you got disturbed by receiving pranams from an elderly person. Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 9: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. We read your post about three hours back and had lengthy discussions. I am so glad that you supported my cause with a wonderful backing from our sacred epic Ramayana. You are correct AKKA. My father cried a lot in helplessness. Whatever we decide, the groom's side should agree to that and we are really helpless to convey the matter to them. The groom's side has to only confirm with the horoscope, but we know where they check the horoscope. We also check in the same place and we have already got positive signal. 1. We are residing in Bangalore only. 2. My brother is just 26 now. He is hesitating to marry. He is telling that his salary is only Rs. 26000/- per month and if he waits for 2 more years, he can better alliances because of higher income. 3. Even he is not ready to have uncle and aunt in the place of our parents. Even he has to do their Padapooja if he marries now as per rituals in our family and he is not ready. 4. Next issue is finding a suitable girl in short notice. 5. My father actually called our priest and he was amazed at the way you have analyzed the issue. Tomorrow he will be here to read all your posts. He says that my mother will have a share in the PUNYA of Kanyadan if I am married within an year of her death. If my brother marries, SHUBHAKARYA will be done within one year but my mother will not get the share of PUNYA from Kanyadan. 6. I was told that I would become younger in relation to my brother's wife, if my he marries first. Otherwise I will be Elder in relation to his wife. I did not understand this concept. Please help me AKKA. All my hopes at your divine feet AKKA. -Chetana 28th Jan 2012 12:21 AM (Midnight) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Few Corrections my just concluded posts AC 3 and AC4. 1. "In AC 3" ".. to accompany him.." should be "..to SYMBOLICALLY accompany him.." 2. Again from "AC 3"- "..this as an guideline.." should be "..this as a guideline.." 3. In "AC 4"- "smooth posing" should be "smooth posting". 4. Again In "AC 4" - "..younger brother & his wife.." should be "..younger brother & younger brother's wife.." -Anu 27th Jan 2012 (8:30 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 4: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. I am breaking the post into two for smooth posing. The other effects of such an act of your father alone doing Kanyadan would appear like a REVOLUTION. If you had nobody from among close relatives to assume the role of parents, it would have been a different issue. As you mentioned, your father would have to face lot of criticizers and he should be ready for that. Many people would expect your father to forgive his younger brother & his wife, as your father happens to be ELDER. The groom and his relatives should be ready for such a REVOLUTION. They have to be informed in advance. I don’t think that it is possible for you to talk to them. Your father will also have a great difficult time explaining them the issues. Please imagine yourself coolly in your father’s shoes and you will understand. In my opinion, your Elder brother and his wife (your Bhabhi) can do your Kanyadan. Even though it breaks the protocol, it will not have any problems. Where are you from ? Is your Elder brother married or yet to marry. If he is not yet married, ask him to marry first and then do your Kanyadan. If it is possible to take the groom’s side into confidence, your father alone can do your Kanyadan as I explained earlier. Please reply fast. I do not have many days left before I proceed for delivery. –Anu 27th Jan 2012 (5:45 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 3: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. I understand your situation. You have a new point. Usually there are debates about the liberty of individuals to select their life partners. Your point further extends it to the LIBERTY in other matters related to marriages as well. As I have made it very clear, I cannot come out of the SHELL. I can’t reveal any personally identifiable information about my family members or myself, which would ultimately affect our private life. How can you expect me to do your Kanyadan along with my husband ? Please do not think otherwise. My husband and I would have happily done your Kanyadan, if we were not in SHELL as I explained in my earlier posts. Now about your father alone doing your Kanyadan – Our ancestors had a noble idea in insisting the presence of wife with a man during all DHARMAKARYAS. This is to implement in spirit the promise made by a man to his wife at the time of marriage (Dharmecha, Arthecha, Kamecha Naaticharaami). We have a classical reference from Ramayana that LORD RAMA prepared himself for an “ASHWAMEDHA YAGA” in the absence of his wife. He never married again. He got an IDOL of SEETA made in GOLD to accompany him in the required rituals. After finding Seeta, he called her back to the palace but Seeta’s life was ended. Finally Lord Rama completed the formalities and rituals of YAGA with Golden IDOL of Seeta. At that time he was a widower. Considering this as an guideline, there is nothing wrong if your father alone does your Kanyadan keeping a portrait of your late mother alongside. Will continue… -Anu 27th Jan 2012 (5:35 PM) Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 8: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. Sorry, I cannot control myself when I remember those bad moments. AKKA, when by my aunts remarks, my mother understood very clearly that her days are numbered. What else can be the meaning of aunts words. It is just that mom will expire soon and I have to do Padapooja of uncle and aunt in my marriage. After they went, mom asked all of us to tell the truth. Though all of us knew the truth, we always tried to encourage her cheer her up as any other human beings do. I hold that aunt solely responsible for my mothers mental sufferings during her last days. Can she be forgiven? I am very clear that I won't have my marriage with that uncle and aunt assuming the role of my parents. My dad is trying to tell me that if they are not given that position in my marriage, we have to answer so many people and unnecessarily all old things would surface... My question is WHY CAN'T MY FATHER ALONE DO MY KANYADAN? I am sure you can find some satisfactory answer and close the mouths of all criticizers who do not have any better job. You have such wonderful knowledge about HINDU scriptures and you have such a kind heart. Please help me AKKA. The groom is almost fixed. I am relaying only on you AKKA. I would consider myself the luckiest girl on earth if YOU and YOUR husband do my Kanyadan. Pranams to your motherly feet AKKA. Chetana 26th Jan2012 9:11 PM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Debashis Chacha, I have to address you as Chacha because of your age. You have written 5 points in your post. If I deserve the first 3, it is mainly due to the BLESSINGS of GURUJI, as I mentioned earlier. At the same time, I should not forget my MIL, husband and all family members who are very supportive. About the 4th one, I must say it is the BLSSINGS of my parents. About 5th one, I am again indebted to GURUJI, MIL, FIL, Husband and all family members. At the same time I cannot forget the Blessings of my mother and father. When a youngster achieves more than the elders, elders cannot offer the pranams to younger person. In fact all parents wish their children to achieve more than them. A true teacher always wants to taste the defeat at the hands of his or her disciple. GURUJI also stressed this point and told me that it is the correct sign of PROGRESS. But the disciple can do it ONLY with the BLESSINGS of GURU. I am guessing that you are from Orissa or Bengal (from your name). Few days back I had written to one person who mailed me about your post. Earlier to that I had mailed him something else in connection with different question. I reproduced a few lines from that old mail in my reply to him. I am doing the same thing now with minor modifications. “When we come to earth, we have a fixed role in the society and we have to follow the norms of the society. Lord Rama an incarnation of Lord Vishnu, humbly submitted at the feet of his parents (Dasharatha and Kousalya) and his step mothers Sumitra and Kaikeyi. When the incarnation of LORD VISHNU follows the norms of our society, there is a clear message in that. We can find similar message from LORD Krishna.” As you mentioned you are 49 years old. How can I accept your Pranams ? Namaskaras can be received / accepted when done by a person YOUNGER in relation. Most of the time Younger in age would be Younger in relation also. Some of the possible situations in which, an younger person is considered Elder in relation and how Debashis and myself do not fit into any of them is explained below: 1) I cannot be your Bhabhi as you are much elder to my husband. 2) I do not have the idea of changing my Ashrama from Grihastha to Sanyasa (in which case all people of Grihasthashrama except my mother become Younger to me in Relation) 3) I may not be one among the Sumangalis receiving Sumangali Pooja at your home during Dasara (if such a practice prevails in your home). One very important thing to be noted at this junctue is that Sumangalis and Kanya receiving Pooja and Namaskaras from all people of the family are considered as forms of GODDESS only on that occasion (or at the best during first NINE days of Dasara). As a small girl I have received (In fact Lots of girls receive) Namaskaras from my grandfather also during Kanya Pooja of Dasara, but later on I cannot be considered ELDER in Relation to my grandfather. 4) I may not be in the position of GURU to Debashis imparting him any kind of UPADESHAM. Unless I am Elder in Relation to somebody, in some way or the other, accepting his / her pranams would be wrong. Therefore I humbly say that it may not be possible, as we all have to follow the footsteps of LORD RAMA & LORD KRISHNA. One alternative is I sincerely wish to be born as your daughter or granddaughter in one of my next births and receive your Pranams at the time of Kanya Pooja during Navaratri. Please reply by posting here or email me. –Anu 26th Jan 2012 (6:40 PM) Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 7: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. I am so glad to receive your blessings so soon AKKA. Your words that YOU ARE WITH ME are giving me the strength to face the entire world. I am so grateful that you have decided to BLESS me with the help of your family members. You are correct AKKA. I lost my cool recollecting the past. It should have been "folding hands". That was the reason for me to stop. I was literally sobbing when I posted "CA 6". Now continuing.. One of our other crooked relative tried to tell me to do Namaskaras to the feet of my Uncle and aunt while they were departing. I refused telling that they never did it to may parents... So WHY SHOULD I? That relative tried to tell that girls should learn to behave with more politeness... My brother supported me telling that I was just following the foot steps of ELDERS (My uncle and Aunt). Aunt cruelly told "She will do, Why Namaskaras..She will do our Padapooja very soon It is a matter of few days". Will continue.. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 2: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. I will post after you complete your part. Please RELAX. You have written "folding feet" in "CA 6". I think it should have been "folding hands". Maintain your cool in tough situations. I am with you. Don't worry. We will find some solution to any problem. You can be more effective only when you are relaxed. Even if I proceed on delivery, I will take the help of my Co-sister or SIL or MIL and complete any emergency questions as you suggested. All the best. Waiting for your further narration. -Anu 24th Jan 2012 (8:55 PM) Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 6: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. My posts CA 4 and CA 5 are to be dated 22nd Jan 2012. Oversight error occurred due to my tensions. AKKA, I am in final year Engineering. When I first posted you, my mother was in death bed suffering from Cancer. A natural last wish of her was my marriage at the earliest. I was in 3rd year at that time. All of us knew that she was counting the days but tried to encourage her. We lost her in Aug 2011. As per traditions, some Shubha Karya has to be conducted within an year of her death and everyone is targeting me. My real problem is doing Padapooja to parents in marriage. I will have to wash the feet and worship my parents first and then grooms' parents along with groom as per rituals. My parents means, some couple who assume the role of bride's parents as my mother is no more. If it were to be my parents, I would have done it very happily. The alternative for my parents is my uncle and his wife (My father's younger brother). Both of them are so mean minded, jealous and ...I just do not want to use further bad words to describe them. They have cheated us and swallowed our share of the property. Forget Padapooja, I do not even want to do Namaskaras to their feet or fold my feet in standing position say Namaste to them. They do not deserve any kind of respect. After so many years, they came to see my mother in the death bed only for indirectly torturing her by their comments. They never did Namaskaras to my parents' feet on arrival or departure though they are supposed to do. Will continue.. Chetana 24th Jan 2012 7:10 PM Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 11: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Waiting humbly with all devotion for your ASHIRVADS AKKA. I came to know that you are back into forum and even given your email id 3 days back. As I wrote earlier, we cannot afford to have a PC and internet connection at home. I have to use neighbor's PC whenever they are not in station. I therefore do not have a email id also. AKKA if you feel that there is enough time, please answer my questions. I have already got an answer for NQ1. Old questions and NQ2 are pending. Please AKKA. AMMA told me she has seen you in Freedom Park during Anna Hazare fasting in August 2011. She is sure because of your style of convincing and impressing people, approximate age and wearing SOCKS and shoes. Usually all ladies wear Sandals. I regret so much that I missed that golden opportunity. I can access internet for next 4 to 6 days AKKA. I will reply to your questions if interaction is needed very fast AKKA. Please AKKA. Your little brother MANU 24th Jan 2012 2:33 PM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AC 1: Dear Little Sister Chetana, Ashirvads. Sorry for having kept you waiting for such a long period. My situation was like that. Now the answer your question to the best of my knowledge and practices in our family is as follows. 1. Mother is eligible to receive the Pada Pooja or Namaskaras on behalf of her sons or daughters in their absence. Father is not eligible to receive on behalf of sons or daughters. 2. Wife is also eligible to receive Pada Pooja or Namaskaras on behalf of her husband, but husband is not eligible to receive the same on behalf of his wife. This is as per the practices in our family and all the families I know. So, your findings about Ganesha and Gurukula, mentioned in your post “CA1” are correct. It seems a partial towards women but has lot of meaning in it. It may not be possible to discuss all the details here at this juncture when I am counting the days for my delivery. We can discuss via email or later. To provide a specific example, my husband was abroad during my first Bheemana Amavasye after marriage. I did an exclusive Padapooja to my MIL in my husband’s place (You may now understand why Fathers are not considered to be eligible). Practically such situations are rare and sometimes it would look too artificial. For example, as I mentioned in one of my earlier posts addressed to “jaggu” (unfortunately it is not labeled or dated – Search for “STOTRA” and you can find it), By the time I complete my Pooja, my husband and FIL would have left home on most of the days. So I do Namskaras my MIL alone after my Pooja. She is eligible to receive Namaskaras on behalf of my FIL and husband. Doing Namaskaras to her feet thrice at that juncture would be artificial. Instead, Namaskaras to her feet ONCE with proper involvement would be quite meaningful. There are more examples when it is actually done in our family or close circle families, but I think I have made it clear. I have absolutely no clue about your problem. If you post your problem, I will try my best to suggest something. –Anu 23rd Jan 2012 (2:45 PM) Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 5: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. My family members (Elder brother and father also know my problems. My father is advising me (almost requesting me) to adjust. Actually I am not confident to send you mail. It must be too tiresome for you to answer all people by mail. But here you can even ask some of your family members to post the answers which you explain them. I will definitely take your blessings by mail and personally also once you become totally free after some months. Please AKKA clarify my doubts. -Chetana 23rd Jan 2012 7:20 PM Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 4: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. Waiting for your Ashirvads and Answer AKKA. I had stopped checking here for your posts. My friend told me that you are back again. It is very important and urgent for me. I have lost my mother few months ago. You are my only hope for a very tough situation in my life. -Chetana 23rd Jan 2012 7:10 PM Name: suvarna Country: India Comment: Anuradha, are u frm bengal? pls give details when all you have to wash your husbands feet and consume that water. did u know before lov marriage about all those rituals? is ur MIL doing all that to your FIL? what about ur mother and other relatives? pls share. I am frm Karnataka. Here doing worship to husbands feet is very common on a festival called bhimana amavase. doing worship to husbands feet in marriage and wedding night also common. I am still studying my final year degree. not married but seen so many of them. Name: suvarna Country: India Comment: Ankita, sorry. in my last post Ankita spelling is wrong. please reply. Name: suvarna Country: India Comment: Ankika, please tell more about wife washing husbands feet and wiping with hair. are u also frm bengal? as per anuradha washing husband feet is done several occasions. what occasions in bengal? please share Name: Debashis Country: India Comment: Hello Anu, I have been following your blog from time to time and have read through the whole of it. From it I have come to this opinion. 1) You are very spiritual and also very philosophical. 2) You are the true embodiment of a modern person without abandoning our Indian values and traditions. 3) You are very kind. 4) You are very educated. 5) Professionally also you are very successful. Due to the above factors I am feeling that you are somebody who is to be looked upto by everybody irrespective of their age. Though I am much older than you, 49 yrs. to be exact, I wish to offer my pranams at your feet and hope you would accept them. Please let me know of your opinion on the same. Debashis Name: Zainul Country: India Comment: Stupid Thread about touching, falling and washing feet Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 10: Dear Anu AKKA, Please accept my humble PRANAMS at your feet and FORGIVE me. All these days I was writing "Sashtanga Pranams to your feet" only because my sister had put it as a condition to me while writing to you, but I never meant it. I was a rebel. I tell you I have questioned so many Swamijis, scholors and elderly people about lot of blind faiths followed in Hiduism (Argued is more appropriate than questioned) and nobody was able to convince me. My AKKA found this website for me. Honestly I ALMOST had a VICTORY SMILE (I never displayed to anybody) when you did not come here for a long time. I thought that you were not coming here because of my questions as some of my friends CONCLUDED. But I had a doubt. I am so lucky that I did not conclude. Now I am repenting for my posts - not the posts but the language I used - I mean I should have been humble and polite while addressing you. I must thank my sister who constantly kept cautioning me not to conclude about you easily. She had the confidence that YOU are the RIGHT PERSON to make me realize the truth. I seek your forgiveness again and again. I am ready to do anything you order me. Please accept me as your humble disciple if I am deserving enough and guide me. Akka tell me one thing- Is donating EYES or any other parts of the body prohibited in HINDU scriptures? Why is there a BLIND FAITH which ia wide spread that "If eyes are donated, they will be born BLIND in the next BIRTH"? Several years back I met with an accident and eyesight of both eyes was affected badly. The doctor was a family friend and wanted to somehow convince our family members about the importance of EYE DONATION. He told that My sight could be easily restored if any of the family members DONATE ONE EYE for me (That may not be legal). Nobody volunteered except my sister (AKKA) despite the fact that I was in 2nd PU and my career would be affected seriously as I had a few months left for exams. They were ready to wait for some other eye donated for which the QUE was quite long. My sister volunteered knowing fully well that it would affect her marriage prospects. I was badly hurt due to the reasoning (That BLIND FAITH I mentioned) other family members relied upon. I was not so much hurt that they were not ready but for the reasoning. Fortunately, I regained my vision completely and managed to get an Engineering seat...From that day I started questioning, protesting and arguing with everybody. It is not only this but lot of other meaningless traditions in Hinduism I questioned. Nobody could answer my questions. Most of them were evasive or accepted their limitations. My sister was always consoling me that I would get RIGHT GURU some day. Now the search has come to an end. Please forgive me and accept me as your disciple. I am ready to follow whatever you say. Please BLESS me with a MESSAGE. I read your post much earlier, did not have courage to seek your forgiveness. -PROBER 19th JAN 2012 1:50 PM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Prober and VARALAXMI, continuing.. Hinduism is like that Bond Paper with many dark spots (A very large WHITE BOND PAPER with hundreds of dark spots). Hinduism is our home. If there are dark spots in our home and our home is not clean, we cannot expect outsiders to clean the same. It is a combined responsibility of all of us. We should not run away also from our responsibilities. In reality there are hundreds of dark spots in the practices of HINDUISM and we are all responsible for their existence. Hinduism is the most flexible culture/religion with maximum diversity. Hinduism is like SOFTWARE - Always ready to be improved. We are all delegated with the power of improving the same. One of the main BASIS which make provision for improvement is "aa nO bhadraaH kratavO yantu vishvataH" Rigveda 1-89-i(please use this in Baraha). Therefore there is no point in Blaming Hinduism. If you have suffered due to any kind of discrimination in HINDUISM, fight against it and set it right for the future generations. How many religions offer this kind of FLEXIBILITY ? Please refer to my post addressed to Sanjay (not labeled -dated 28th Feb 2011). The dark spots got introduced due to various reasons like BLIND faiths, external aggressions, Selfish people etc. Realize the quantity of CLEAN space and act towards clearing dark spots. Continuous effort and creating awareness is the need of the day - not running away or indulge in blame games. There have been so many improvements over a period of time due to efforts of many people. Please write to me about your opinion and problems you faced with HINDU practices. aa nO bhadraaH kratavO yantu vishvataH, aa nO bhadraaH kratavO yantu vishvataH, aa nO bhadraaH kratavO yantu vishvataH -ANU 17th Jan 2012 (5:05 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Prob 5 & VL 4: Dear little brother Prober, Ashirvads. I appreciate your honesty. Making a serious attempt is important. Now the very important message for both of you: It was only a survey. As I mentioned earlier, there can be many correct answers and we have to treat all answers with equal respect. I asked you to check with the people "WHAT THEY SAW". Everybody described the DARK SQUARES & RECTANGLES. Nobody observed the HUGE WHITE space around (in JK BOND paper). Some answer could have been ....sq mm of WHITE space out of .... total space. Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 9: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. I failed in finishing the survey in 24 hours AKKA. All were asking what is it? Why? etc. I must admit that the best answer finalized by survey (including me) is not as good as finalized by VARALAXMI. I had drawn 2 squares and two rectangles (to have minimum words). The best I ended with is like 3mm top 5 mm left 2 x 3 mm, 4 top 5 left 3 x 3 mm.... Total ....sq mm. VARALAXMI'S answer is best in my opinion- very structured, systematic and providing clear information. My sister is joking at me that I am like Shanmukha starting first, finishing last with not a very good answer while VARALAXMI is like Ganesha starting later, finishing in shorter time with effective answer. As I understand from the posts here, VARALAXMI is younger to me and not studying engineering. But I must admit that she planned (Xeroxing, Using friends' help) better and finished much better than me. I can make out that you have read her answer and still not reacted to it probably with an intention of NOT INFLUENCING ME. I should admit that I have spent lot more time than her yet ending up with an inferior answer. I was thinking about improving the answer all the while and asked many of my friends to call me and update if they found a better answer later. I did not check this forum till today after my previous post thinking that it would be cheating. NOW OVER TO YOU AKKA FOR VERDICT AND WE (ALL AT OUR FAMILY) ARE SURE YOU WILL HAVE SOMETHING SERIOUS TO TEACH US. 17Th Jan 2012 1:10 PM Name: RAM 1111 Country: India Comment: Well done YOGA Junkie Name: Anu Country: India Comment: AVV 1: Dear Vidya Chachi, Please accept my humble pranams at you feet and bless me. I request you to forgive me for this delay in replying you. I have not received any mail from you so far (I am not complaining). I know you are too concerned about my health like all elders. I am fine. I am enjoying entire day as I explained VARALAXMI in my post, labeled "VL 3". The reasons for delay in replying you are 1. I had to think a lot and discuss with my DH, MIL and other family members about your advice of getting into teaching job. 2. That was discussed many other times and so many people have told me the same thing. 3. Later I had to reply to lot of mails. The positives about me joining teaching job are 1. Pay package is not an issue. My DH's pay package is Rs. 35 lakhs per year and I need not earn any money for family needs. 2. Lots of people (well wishers) insist that I join teaching. My problems in getting into teaching job are 1. I have to now join a college and get a PG degree (M.E. or M.Tech.) and then complete Ph.D. All this would take about 5 years and I will have the responsibility of 2 children. 2. Our personal life would get affected to a greater extent. I am unable to deliver another Pravachana in a Satsanga or similar gathering, as I explained earlier. Believe it or not, until very recent days (1st Jan 2012), I was almost forced to receive Sumangali Pooja in some or other close relatives' or close circle friends' or other homes recommended by them on an average of ONE Sumangali Pooja every alternate day. It is not possible to turn down their requests and hurt them. My MIL and her friends are trying their best to keep it minimum and even then, it is like that. I do not know how it happened, but lots of people believe that such act would bring them prosperity. All my attempts to explain that I am a NORMAL HUMAN BEING are in vain. About 2 to 3 months back, two of my young office colleagues got married and they invited me for some pre marriage rituals conducted at their homes. Those girls are around 23 years. They work in projects, which I am leading and close to me. ALL the time they call me AKKA even in our company. So I cannot refuse their invitation. But when I went there, I was surprised to get a further request to receive Sumangali Pooja along with 8 others. I did not expect this, as I am not a relative. Their mothers told me that my colleagues talk so much about me and like me so much and hence I should receive. I had to agree. My problem was I had to remove my SOCKS. I always wear SOCKS and shoes to office so that the pastes of Kumkum, Arishina, Chandan applied on my feet during Sumangali Poojas are covered and not seen by office colleagues. When I removed my Socks, they asked me if I am coming from a different Sumangali Pooja in the morning in a different house and I had to admit it. That was not a big issue. But later, during all further Sumangali Poojas done by those girls, I was invited, I could not say no, and always my feet are already decorated with pastes of Kumkum etc. They got curious and started probing. I had great difficulty to convince them that all the time it was just coincidence. Luckily the matter was not spread in our office. If I join teaching job, I have a serious apprehension that the situations would be tougher. 3. Many people from close circle approach me with some or other problems at home or work place or any other issues. I sincerely try my best to discuss the matter and give suggestions. I feel that it is my duty. This has further resulted in escalation of Sumangali Poojas and situations of that sort. I do not know what makes people love me so much. But if I am a teacher I further loose my personal life. We are living in a SHELL now and even that may not be possible if I join teaching. I will wait for your advice with all humbleness either here or by email. -Anu 15th Jan 2012 (12:10 PM) Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 10: AKKA, I left the PC on and rushed for survey. I had to tell my parents & my sister about you and later to all of my friends. All have agreed not post anything here or mail you for next SIX months. All will route their emergency questions through me. All of a sudden I am getting so much importance. I drew 3 squares and 2 rectangles. The best answer all of us finalized is in the form of a table. Expressing anything in the tabular form is not possible. I thought of sending a mail initially but later on decided to describe the table. Table header will have DT, DL, L x B, AR meaning Distance from TOP edge, Distance from Left edge, Length x Breadth & Area respectively. Next 5 lines will have required information in mm or sq.mm. Finally Total area of all squares and rectangles expressed at the end. In my opinion, this is the best (since grammar is not important) and it gives all information about locations, dimensions of squares and rectangles along with Total area covered by all of them. There were so many types of answers, finally all agreed this to be the best. I am eagerly waiting to read your comments on the best answer or you may have a still better answer. -Your Little Sister VARU 14th Jan 2012 (11:55 PM) Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 9: AKKA, I did not mail you so far because I did not want to disturb you. How many people can to answer separately thro' mail? As I said already, My sister's problem is temorarily solved. I sincerely wished that I would be one among people giving you feet massages. I have already finished drawings on A4 sheet, takesn 10 Xerox of it and with the help of my friends started survey also. 10 of us are contacting 9 each and including we 10, it becomes 100. I will post about the result within 2 to 3 hours. All of us are very much interested to do anything told by you. Bye for now. -Your Little Sister Varu 14th Jan 2012 (6:00 PM) Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 8: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. It is midnight now. I am not in teaching now. Working as an assistant to SYSTEM Admin. The job is tedious with no regular timings and lot of work. I am enjoying. The survey report will be ready in less than 24 hours. I feel myself honored for being the first person chosen by you for such survey work. 14th JAN 2012 12:31 AM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: VL 3: Dear VARU, I am writing to you after long time. I have not got any mail from you so far. I am totally free now - routine is like taking solid or liquid food 10 or more times in small quantity whenever MIL gives me, relaxing, walking to have enough exercise, spending time with my son and other family members (My MIL has minimized visitors), getting nice foot & leg massages from loving family members, Regular pooja to my satisfaction, talking over phone with very close family friends etc. One more thing is I am replying to personal mails very fast due to time availability. I will not be able to do it after Jan 31st (or may be by last week of Jan itself). So please mail me fast. You can even exchange 5 to 10 mails per day now and ONLY NOW. If time permits I ask you to conduct the survey I have mentioned in my just concluded post to Prober. -Anu 13th Jan 2012 (10:25 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Prob 4: Dear Little brother Prober, Ashirvads. Can you do a small survey for me ? 1. Just take an A4 size JK Bond paper. 2. Draw rectangles and squares of different dimensions (not exceeding 4 mm x 4mm). I will leave the total number of rectangles and squares to your choice (min 4 to max 8). 3. Let the positions of rectangles and squares be random. Mark the dimensions of all of them with their distances from top and left edges clearly. Since you are an engineer, you can do it easily and effectively. 4. Completely make the inside of rectangles and squares dark (not just outlines) 5. Survey about 50 to 100 people and ask them what they see. But you should survey Primary Children, High school Children, PU Students, Engineering Students, Primary and High school teachers, College teachers, Very less educated people, House wives, People working in other fields, Retired people etc. etc. Cover as many categories as possible. Carry some white sheets with you and ask them to write what they see in as fewer words as possible (grammar does not matter). People taking part later can see what others have written and improve if they want. 6. Choose the answer, which is best in your opinion (You can choose multiple answers also considering children taking part in the survey) I will wait for your reply by Sunday or Monday) -Anu 13th Jan 2012 (9:45 PM) Name: Yoga Junkie Country: U.S.A. Comment: Well, I took your advice. I first went to the alter where the swami's picture was and touched his sandals. Then I went to the Yoga teacher, bowed, and touched her feet. I received great blessings. I have made touching or kissing the feet of people I revere in life a regular thing. I have a teacher who is teaching me about herbs and before every lesson I bow and touch her feet. It is the most humble, peaceful, and obedient feeling to do so. As an American I was at first apprehensive about feet until I looked into Hindu ideology. Now that I have tried touching and kissing the feet of the right people, feet have become my favorite part of the human body. There is definitely a power in them. I think if I get married I will touch my wife's feet every morning and worship her as a goddess. Name: buy cheap oem software Country: India Comment: OBav2c comment6 Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 8: AKKA, I am here. All these days I did not post anything after reading your MIL's message. My sister's problem is solved temporarily. Please have sufficient rest. I want to mail something about my sister's problem. I feel it to be more comfortable than sharing in open here. I am reading comments here regularly. I have to thank Prober for supporting my case and also agreeing with me about many HINDU CULTURES. -Your Little Sister VARU 12th Jan 2012 (10:40 PM) Name: oem software Country: India Comment: SNTfE2 comment6 Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Srini congrats so far we are the only true devotees and followers of our holly divine anu akka regds Arun Name: Arun Country: India Comment: If Anu Akka can share why not me ? mine is arun.amengmail all Anu Akka's followers are Welcome Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Prob 3: Dear Little brother Prober, Ashirvads. I appreciate your thinking. Answers to most of your questions need lengthy answers. Some questions might need more than 100 posts also. There may be very good interaction. I will consider answering Manoj and VARALAXMI if they are still checking this forum. I have not received a mail from them till now. Otherwise I can give priority to those who are checking here regularly. All at my home enjoyed about your friends' thinking that I will not come back because of your questions. I will not run away. I must be ready to face any tough question or situation according to GURUJI. I still remember his explanation to me that Swamy Vivekananda tested his GURU Ramakrishna Paramahamsa in several ways before accepting him. I am not comparing myself with the GREAT Ramakrishna Paramahamsa. I am only taking his attitude and spirit with all humility and humbleness (GURUJI's attitude was also same). Please keep checking the forum or mail me for anything. -Anu 12th Jan 2012 (6:10 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: BHAV 3: Dear little sister Bhavana, I forgot to ask you one thing. Which is your place ? I mean District Taluk or city. Most probably you are from Karnataka (or your mother tongue is Kannada). There is little possibility that you are from Andhra Pradesh. What is the actual place ? (Parental and husband's) Who appointed the priest who conducted your marriage ? This is for me to understand the variations followed in rituals. Waiting for your reply and other questions. -Anu 12th Jan 2012 (5:45 PM) Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Well done Srini Bhaiyya. Congrats Name: Prober Country: India Comment: Wonderful JOB Srini. I know what I have undergone while posting "PAA 6a:" to "PAA 6e:". You are so humble in spite of your achievement. It would help thousands of people when they are struck. Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 7: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. Wonderful AKKA. Some of my friends thought that you would never come back because of my questions and got nice scholdings from my sister. I have not sent a mail to you so far. I thought that your posts will enlighten thousands of people who check this site. Otherwise you should post them in your personal blog so that on a long run millions are enlightened. I sincerely feel that answers to most of my questions would be lengthy. Hence I request you to take them after you recover well after delivery. I will wait for any amount of time. I personally feel that you should take the questions of Manoj (He wants to give better comfort to his mother) and VARALAXMI. They need you more than rest of us (I seek forgiveness from those who differ) at the moment. I have the same feeling of VARALAXMI as expressed by her in her post "ANU AKKA(VL) 7:". I started HATING HINDU culture long back and started PROBING and protesting every bit of it. I never found a person who was as convincing as you so far. You are so humble and go down to the level of ordinary people and make things clear. You touch their heart. I will mail you only for testing. 12th JAN 2012 10:08 AM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: BHAV 2: Continuing.. The beautiful and meaningful "Arundhati Darshan" is thus reduced to mere formality of pointing the bride's hand to the blank sky when the Sun is shining. As I said, many brides have asked me openly, after they get little closer to me (all have entered our close circle families as DILs) about meaningless rituals. Many grooms (I would be knowing them from longer time) also asked me. But all of them understood the significance after "Arundhati Darshan" was repeated in night in a clear sky when they can actually identify the Saptarshi Mandala, Arundhati Star etc. with detailed narration behind the tradition. We (My MIL or myself) conduct the rituals related to that and many other traditions in our closer circle as almost all family elders request us to do it. The one conducting those rituals (priest by profession or otherwise) has to explain the significance of all practices, but now a days nobody has time. Well coming to your case, I will explain the IDEA behind the ritual of putting new anklets. It is not important that you already had new ones. You always had KUMKUM on your forehead but husband applies the same again during various rituals including tying TALI (MANGALASUTRA) around your neck. The significance that it is from your DH makes a difference. Likewise it is considered that husband applying KUMKUM on the forehead of wife daily as sacred. It is meant to build a stronger bond between couple (Now a days, it is at least followed on festival days). The IDEA is to make the husbands palms and hand touch wife's feet in PUBLIC sufficiently thus giving him a message that he should be ready to protect and guard her, be ready to offer any service to her including her feet when the need arises. The TOE rings are to be put by husband and the palms and hands do not sufficiently come in contact with wife's feet that time. Actually during all years with Adhikamasa, new pair of TOE rings are gifted by the parental side of wife and husband is supposed to put them systematically every time. It is not the money that is spent for TOE ring that is important. It is meant for improving the bonding. Your brother may travel all the way (or you may travel all the way) for tying Rakhi on Rakshabandhan day. The expenses for traveling are much more than the COST of RAKHI. But the VALUE is IMMENSE. I feel that this is not one of the question you wanted to ask me before your marriage. Please feel free to ask any number of questions. You can mail me also if you want. -Anu 12th Jan 2012 (8:21 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: BHAV 1: Dear little sister Bhavana, All the best for your married life. As I mentioned earlier, the practices and rituals vary from area to area, family to family etc. The original Vedic Marriages used to take a good long duration of about NINE days and such marriages were held (by families which could afford) even during first half of 20th Century. Gradually marriages are reduced to just one or two days. Many rituals are therefore cut off and many are modified in order to complete in shorter time. Many times it depends on priests and the requests of the side, which has appointed the priests. Many priests (when they have a free hand), skip many rituals in order to attend some other work (priest work only). Many of my close circle brides asked me about "Arundhati Darshan" being done in the afternoon. My MIL is calling for dinner. Will continue Name: Bhavana Country: India Comment: Anu akka, Thanks for coming back. I've been wanting to ask you a couple of questions for a long time. I hoped you'd come online before I got married. I never checked the site. I just got married a few days ago by the way. During our marriage, we had a ritual. I wanted to know why this particular ritual was done. I asked my husband and he said that he hasn't got a clue. My husband pulled my right leg a couple of steps forward. After that the priest instructed my husband to put a new pair of anklets on my leg and remove the old ones. The new pair of anklets were gifted from the groom's side. The other one was the one my parents gave. Considering that the anklets given by my parents were pretty new, I wondered why it had to be changed. My husband put the new anklet on both the legs and I had to bow down at his feet (the fifth time on the same day). My MIL is no more and I don't know if I should ask my FIL. Please answer my curiosity as to why the new anklets were put. Is this a common tradition? It didn't happen during my brother's wedding. My athige just had to fall at his feet after he pulled her leg. I hope you have a safe pregnancy. Thank you!!! Name: srini Country: India Comment: Kavithaji apke charano me sadar pranam,n i m thankful for ur appreciation it was just a try, Name: Swarna and Prakash Country: India Comment: Pranams to your genius feet Anu AKKA. We have sweet dispute among us and we are enjoying it. Dispute is WHO should call you AKKA and who should cal Bhabhi. We are so lucky that we got your blessings so soon. Many are waiting for such a long time as we can see. We have learned a great lesson that we should see GOD in all our works from your post to Kavita (both KMS 3). We realized our mistake also that we did not visit The struggle site even a single day. We missed getting the glimpse of LIVING GODDESS that is you. We have sent email also. Please reply only if it is possible. Your INBOX must be flooded by this time. Once again Pranams to your HOLY feet. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Dear srini, Thanks a lot. You have done it and we feel are nearer to ANU DIDIJI than before. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. I am using my neighbors PC as our PC has some problems. All of us and our neighbors & friends realized our mistakes about our way of thinking. Your TWO posts both labeled "KMS 3" (may be typing error and latest had to be "KMS 4". were superb. Only a DIVINE personality like you would value a Squirrel's service higher than others. If it was not LORD RAMA, no others would have even noticed that SQUIRREL. We now understood the meaning of "Karmanyevadhikaraste..." also. If we were to be there at least on any one day, may be we would have had the opportunity to have you DARSHAN. It is OK even if we did not recognize you. That would have washed all our SINS. Surely we should simply concentrate on making our best and leave the rest to GOD. ALL of us are feeling SO SORRY. Please forgive us DIDIJI. Pranams DIDIJI. -KAVITA mohan 10th Jan 2012 6:25 PM Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected n divine Anu akka thanks a lot for ur compliments,but its nothing much considering ur effort,n ur knowledge,but ur compliments means a lot to me,thanks Anu akka,thanks a lot,my head at ur feet Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Little brother srini, Ashirvads. That was a wonderful attempt from you. -Anu 9th Jan 2011 (9:15 PM) Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected Anu Akka pranams to ur feet,i thought to try different,so i did,Pranams again Name: Anu Country: India Comment: KMS 3: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. I will further clarify. We get the human life due to our good deeds in several births. Being born as humans is the right WINDOW to realize GOD. If a SQUIRREL has enough commonsense that irrespective of the quantum of contribution, one has to contribute as much as he / she can, should we not think in a better way? It is not the QUANTITY we contribute, It is the QUALITY, It is the thoughts and ideas behind the contribution, It is our sincere involvement which is IMPORTANT. You might have read in many stories that the GOD considered the contribution of very poor as more VALUABLE than the expensive contributions of kings and rich people. LORD Krishna preferred to have simple food from VIDURA's house rather than the palatial FOOD from Duryodhana. He considered the dry "AVALLAKKI" of Sudhama more valuable. If you (or your friends and neighbors) think that I have influenced and attracted more people to the struggle we are discussing about and my contribution is HIGHER, I have to very humbly disagree with you. The reasons are - My Company supported me fully. I did not loose any income. My life did not change a bit due to my participation. Except the severe tiredness, nothing happened. On the other hand, think of people who might have lost one or two day salary which might be very crucial for them, think of students who lost many hours of study and hence score little lesser in their exams and thus affecting their career. Their contribution would be dearer to GOD than mine. You do not know the GOD's way. Simply follow LORD KRISHNA's preaching in BHAGAVADGEETA (Karmanyevadhikarate Maa Phaleshu Kadachana...) Simply do your duty sincerely and leave the rest to GOD. All of you can contribute much more than me to the struggle in GOD's view. So do not hesitate and shy away thinking that your presence will not make much difference. I agree that you need not participate if 1. You have Ideological differences with the struggle or 2. Your Consciousness is not approving the participation in the struggle or 3. Your health or some other serious issue prevents you from participation etc. But not for the reasons stated by your neighbors and friends. -Anu 8th Jan 2011 (5:00 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: KMS 3: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. I want to remind you again about the story of EVERYBODY, SOMEBODY, ANYBODY and NOBODY. If all people think the same way as your neighbors and friends who feel that their presence would hardly make any difference, there would be NOBODY in the STRUGGLE. If it is possible, very politely remind them about the attitude of SQUIRREL in RAMAYANA. When RamSetu was being built joining INDIA and LANKA, a squirrel was wetting itself in water, roll around in sand, reach the venue of Setu and Shake the SAND which was on it's body... Lord RAMA appreciated the services of the SQUIRREL and BLESSED it. Such great messages from EPICS are the need of the day. More later -Anu 8th Jan 2011 (3:20 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Little brother srini, Ashirvads. That was a good way of trying to convey. Mine is anupama1984febgmail -Anu 08th Jan 2011 (2:58 PM) Name: Vidyavati Country: India Comment: VV 1: Dear DAUGHTER ANU, GOD BLESS YOU. I could not keep myself steady after my friend called me to inform that you are posting again. So I am sitting in front of PC at this ODD hour. It is around 1:15 AM now. Take care of your health. Your MIL and mother are very lucky to get a chance to do tour care taking after prior to and after delivery. I have seen you but unfortunately did not know that it was YOU. I have participated in some protest marches and other programs of "FIGHT AGAINST CORRUPTION" struggle. I was there on 3 to 4 times. I have seen you always but very unfortunate. You are many times more impressive in PERSON than in a forum like this. I have no doubt that it was YOU. I must say that you should change to teaching profession. You can directly mold thousands of students who would be vary valuable responsible citizens of our nation and indirectly millions. The pay package will not be anywhere near what you are getting now (and further hikes you would get in software industry). But your contribution to MANKIND and NATION would be millions of times of that of your pay package. In fact it would be invaluable. As a Professor and due to retire in a few years, I clearly feel that magnetic personality in you. Please reply only if your health permits. -Prof. Vidyavati 8th Jan 2011 1:34 AM Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka pranams to ur divine lotus feet after srinivask the point should come pranams again Name: srini Country: India Comment: srinivaskupadhyayagmail anu akka my heartful pranams to ur divine feet,i m keeping my head to ur feet for ur blessings,n above is my mail idname just tried to put in alternate way.pranams again Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SP 1a: Dear Swarna and Prakash, My heartfelt Blessings and all the best for your first experience of becoming parents. I hope that your questions are answered in posts to Saroja and Prakash. If there is anything else, please feel free to put it here -Anu 07th Jan 2012 (9:52 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SV 1c: Dear Saroja and Vikas, Continuing... You might have noiticed that "3 a)" is missing. Posting of that failed again with the same message. I cannot understand. Do not worry about it. I will see what best I can do It is 40 minutes since I posted initially today. If it is going to be like this, I may not be able to post anything in future. -Anu 07th Jan 2011 (9:22 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SV 1b: Dear Saroja and Vikas, Continuing... 3. Most of the content I could not post is covered in subsequent posts. Probably what is not covered is b) I had expressed my Pranams to Gaurav Chacha, Sreelekha and Malavika. C) I had expressed my inability to post photos and videos of daily Namaskara sessions to Priya USA due to privacy reasons (It is not possible in this forum- We can't even post our mail ids here). If there is anything else, please feel free to put across till the end of Jan 2011. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SV 1a: Dear Saroja and Vikas, My heartfelt Blessings and all the best for your first experience of becoming parents. I am Sorry that I did not notice your question as soon as I started checking posts here recently. Answers to your questions: 1. I am guessing that you are from South India and know the meaning of AKKA. One of you can call me AKKA and the Other as "Bhabhi", or "Attige", "Manni" (or "Anni") or "Vaini" all meaning the same as per your mother tongue and practices in your family. Whatever you find as affectionate should be perfect. 2. PLEASE ABSTAIN. EVEN MY FIL WHO IS A DOCTOR, ADVICES SO. ALL IN OUR FAMILY AND CLOSER CIRCLE ABSTAIN TILL THE NEWBORN IS AT LEAST SIX MONTHS OLD FROM THE DATE PREGNANCY IS DETECTED. The question of mistaking you for this question (or any question from anybody) does not arise. Please feel free to put any question. -Anu 07th Jan 2011 (8:40 PM) Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. Your post "KMS 2" is an eye opener for all of us about our responsibilities towards our nation and society. All of us in our family will follow your foot steps and promise you that we will never think twice when the nation needs us. I request you not to bother answering questions here and take full rest. We will wait for your divine posts and get blessings at appropriate time. Few of our neighbors and friends are commenting that their or our (our family members') participation in the struggle against corruption would have hardly made any difference. I do not not know if I had thought the same way if you were not in the struggle. PRANAMS DIDIJI. 06th Jan 2012 9:10 PM Name: Zainul Country: India Comment: How can one think of touching feet and the foolish act of drinking water after washing feet? Doesn't it look unhealthy with dirt, infections on the feet? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: KMS 2: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. I will wait for 3 to 4 days for posts of all who are checking regularly and then start answering. My health is OK now. If I take sufficient rest, I will be OK. When it is SDK's DETECTIVE work, there cannot be any wrong outcome!! She is a perfect SUPER DETECTIVE. To answer your other questions in your last but one post, I did not give a call here for PROTECTING my identity from people. As you know, from previous posts, people are not leaving me to have any private life. Even during our Gruhapravesham, we had to have TWO Separate Groups of GUESTS as I have explained earlier. Why should I give a call? It is the duty of EVERYBODY. But as the story of EVERYBODY, NOBODY, ANYBODY & SOMEBODY goes, usually NOBODY will do EVERYBODY's job. It is the responsibility of all of us to fight against corruption and other evils prevailing in our society. Of course I have contributed my little in making people to participate in the struggle. As far as completing my Office work, again there are huge responsibilities on me. Our MD & his wife are kind enough and allow me to have any number of leaves. But as SDK stated, Lot of projects are in my need, and I have to make some arrangement. The reputation of our company would have suffered very seriously if I had taken rest after those 15 days of continuous participation in the struggle. Our Clients would have suffered a lot in terms of their productivity. I could manage and my policy is. "give it a sincere try". Nothing can happen to me as long as my DH is there to support me and my MIL, FIL, parents, all youngsters are there. Besides there are so many family friends and well wishers. We should not forget that millions of people have sacrificed much more than what I did for the struggle, during our freedom fight and we have to respect their sacrifices. My pay package from my company is Rs. 28 lakhs per annum and I should do justice to that to the possible extent. Now I am on complete rest. Except emergencies, my office will not bother me for next 6 to seven months and I will be getting complete payment. Same thing was done during my 1st Pregnancy also. Ours' is a small company and I am the highest paid employee (after our MD and his wife) and I should lead by example. I will write more later. -Anu 04th Jan 2012 (4:55 PM) Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. Please update us about your health. Is the information given here by SDK DIDI correct? Your health and rest are more important. I can wait for any period for my answers. If your health permits, I am waiting for your answers to Tarun, Arun, Prober and Saroja & Vikas. Only if your health permits. I request all who are active in this thread to ask Anu DIDIJI to answer for emergencies only. PRANAMS DIDIJI. 03rd JAN 2012 9:15 PM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, I am ANU. Your Dear SISTER ANU. I am Back. I do not have any office work for next several months and taking total rest from today at home. I will be able to spend about 30 minutes to 1 hour everyday for posting here. After my delivery (February), I will not be able to post anything for many more months. I appeal to those who are regularly checking the posts here to inform me so that I can take their questions first. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. All in our family are praying for your good health. We are more proud of you than before after learning that you are from Freedom fighters' family. It is natural that you took part in fight against corruption. Why didn't you give a call to all of us. We would have had a great chance to get your direct blessings. One more thing is why did you work so hard to complete pending works of your company when you were concession from your MD? I feel that with your Brains, you would have weighed all consequences before taking any decisions. Pranams again to your HOLY feet. Please reply whenever your health permits - KAVITA mohan 28th Dec 2011 12:11 AM Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Dear KAVYA (SDK) DIDI, Please accept my pranams to your feet. Why do you feel you don't deserve my Pranams? Will you say same thing to your younger sister? You had the luck of placing your head on ANU DIDIJI's feet. All of us are just imagining her feet. That itself is enough. Thanks a lot for the information. Please post any other information you get about ANU DIDIJI. Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet. We feel that you would have thought all possible situations and risks before straining your body. We have finished our exams (ODD semester). We are thinking that you have given everybody a message that "Nothing else should be the priority when the Nation needs you". We will pray daily for your speedy recovery. We will wait for your Ashirvads with full patience. Pranams to your LOTUS feet again -RAM1111 27th Dec 2011 12:14 AM. Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 10: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Waiting humbly with all devotion for your ASHIRVADS AKKA. Please reply whenever your health permits. I pray God for your recovery and best health. If there is anything else possible from your little brother please tell me. AMMA is telling me that nothing can happen to a Great Soul like you. Few questions to you - NQ1. Why did you strain so much? You could have taken rest. So many people were there in those protests supporting Anna Hazare. NQ2. Do you completely agree with Anna Hazare? AMMA keeps telling me that some of his demands are not practical. Eagerly waiting for your Ashirvads again AKKA. Your LITTLE brother MANU 25th Dec 2011 07:40 PM Name: KAVYA Country: India Comment: LSKM 1: Dear Little Sister KAVITA mohan, GOD Bless you. I have to tell this as it is a must when anyboby offers Pranams to feet and I am not supposed to keep quiet. Honestly I do not have any qualities which deserve Pranams from you. You may be just little younger to me. Even before your post I have been continuously trying to get information about Anu AKKA. Yesterday I managed to get very little and I am sharing the with everybody here. Anu AKKA actively involved in processions and other activities for about 15 days in August during the Protests and Fasts observed through out the nation during Anna Hazare's fast. (I came to know yesterday only) Before that she was also involved in meetings and planning about the protests for several days. She has strained her self too much. Her office / company also supported fully as many IT companies did. Since she has a great strength to impress people, she had to actively involve in processions, talking to people etc. many time in hot sun. That was too much for a pregnent lady. After that She completed all pending works of her office also, even though her company MD and others insisted on taking rest. She had very critical role in some of the projects it seems. Since then she is forced to take lot of rest. Her health is now stable but lots and lots of rest needed. I also came to know that her father, mother and FIL are from Freedom Fighters family background. One good news is that she is staying here in Bangalore for her delivery as a precaution. Let us all hope for the best health of her BODY. I was told that her will power is enormous and she will be able to overcome anything. I will post again if I come to know anything new. -Your loving sister SDK 25th Dec 2011 12:40 PM Name: Swarna and Prakash Country: India Comment: Pranams to your genius feet Anu AKKA. We have same questions as Saroja & Vikas. I am Swarna and my hubby told me to enter his name also. Actually my MIL is good unlike many other MILS of my friends. I am only little naughty. I am just 22. From the beginning I am little naughty and fun loving type. Fortunately I did not get a strict MIL. Some times my hubby and myself make some naughty acts just for fun but MIL does not understand them as jokes and her feelings are hurt. When we explain our intention also, she does not scold us. She just smiles and that makes us very uneasy. I feel that at least at those times I deserve her scoldings. MIL is very strict with my SIL (her own daughter) and I cannot understand that. When we tried a lot to pull my MIL's legs yesterday, she gave us a file saved and asked us to read it offline. and it was all the views here. It was on OLD PC without NIC. Our attitude changed in just a few hours all because of you anu akka. You are so powerful in influential. We do not have guts to show our face to my MIL. First thing in the morning, my hubby requested his friend to lend his laptop and we connected to internet for posting our Pranams to you. NIC of desktop will be set soon and we will visit here regularly for your Blessings. Please answer whenever it is possible for you. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Yoga junkie, RAM1111's opinion is correct. Why should you hesitate to touch your teacher's feet who is truly deserving unlike lot of teachers who are just namesake teachers? Please put your reasons for hesitation. We will be eager to read Anu AKKA's answer and clarification whenever she can. We are sure Anu AKKA will teach all of us a valuable lesson thro' anything she writes. Dear BitterTRUTH, you are right. Anu AKKA has the unique power of ADDING value to anything and convert it into a MESSAGE to society. Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Yoga junkie, Why are you hesitating to touch Yoga teacher's feet even after understanding the POWER and benefits of Touching feet of right people? If you have any doubts about it in your mind, ANU AKKA is the best to clarify as you might have known if you have gone thro' all posts here. Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear BitterTRUTH DIDI, You have humbled us. Name: Yoga junkie Country: U.S.A. Comment: I go to this Hindu Temple to do Yoga even though I am not a Hindu. I see the guru's disciples bow and touch the guru's sandals that are by his picture. I was wondering if it would be acceptable for me to not only touch the guru's sandals after the lesson, but touch the teacher's feet and thank her for such a great lesson? I often touch my best friend's feet who is older than me. Sometimes I even kiss them. It is a powerful and humbling feeling and it makes me feel fulfilled. I want to apply this practice of devotion with my Yoga teacher. Would it be okay? Name: your brother Country: India Comment: when are you coming back Name: bharathavarsha Country: India Comment: I went through this divine thread, I took a lot of time (it was so worthy though) and I salute Anu Akka for all her knowledge and expertise. I may call her Anu Akka even though it appears she is junior to me in terms of age (knowledge-wise I know I am not even 1% of what she possesses). I hope Anu Akka comes back soon to enlighten us. Like all others here say, I surrender to her lotus feet and may get blessed by her esteem knowledge about Hindu Tradition and Practices... Name: BitterTRUTH Country: India Comment: BT RAM 2: My Dear RAM1111 sisters, How is it going help anybody by knowing if I am a BOY or GIRL? Anyway it does not serve any purpose hiding it either. I am a married WOMAN. Only females will have more Bitter experiences in our setup. My experiences might quench the thirst of people who are just curious but never ADD any VALUE or MESSAGE useful for the society. It needs Divine personalities like ANU AKKA to extract and give appropriate MESSAGES by ADDING suitable VALUE to such experiences (just like giving the shape of an IDOL to a stone). About SORRY- In my view, I must apologize to any person if I hurt his or her feelings irrespective of their age. 1st Dec 2011 11:15 Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear BitterTruth ji, No SORRYs please. It would be embarrassing if an elder person says SORRY. But you have not told whether you are a BOY or GIRL. If it is not objectionable to you, you can tell the same along with your experiences. 28th Nov 2011 21:35 Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Dear KAVYA (SDK) DIDI, Please accept my pranams to your feet. If you have any information about ANU DIDIJI and her health, please inform all of us. I cannot express how uncomfortable we are missing ANU DIDIJI for so long. KAVITA mohan 28th Nov 2011 2:05 PM Name: BitterTRUTH Country: India Comment: BT RAM 1: My Dear RAM1111 sisters, I have stated in my latest post to Anu AKKA that I do not want to disturb her. I only missed few words in that post. My sentence which read "Please write something-atleast one or two lines everyday for all of us" should have been "Please write something-atleast one or two lines everyday for all of us IF YOUR HEALTH PERMITS". But I do not want to give any excuses. SORRY to you and all those who feelings are hurt. Though all of you are younger to me, you have reminded me to be CAREFUL before posting. Thanks a lot for that. As far as reading your posts, I have read all posts and know the extent to which all people (including YOU and ME) LOVE and WORSHIP ANU AKKA. In fact I have saved this entire page and keep reading all posts of ANU AKKA and the posts addressed to ANU AKKA. I have done it so many times. I know that you were the first LUCKY ones to get ANU Akka's blessings in this forum. Let me tell you EVEN DREAMING to disturb Anu AKKA's health would be a GREAT SIN. But you will agree with me that without ANU AKKA's posts, we get a feeling of MISSING something VERY IMPORTANT. 27th Nov 2011 21:25 Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Ram 1111 ver correct we all will shareour own experincaes giving respect to elders. specially to the sisters and sis in laws who come to our life in a mother role. let Anu akka take rest lots of pranams to her divine lotus feet.. Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Hello BitterTRUTH, please let our DEAR ANU AKKA to have sufficient rest. Are you a boy or girl? Instead of disturbing Anu AKKA, you can share your experiences which would be useful for others. Don't take us wrong. If you have read our posts you will understand how much we LOVE and WORSHIP Anu AKKA. 27th NOV 2011 12:23 Name: BitterTRUTH Country: India Comment: BT AA 2: Anu AKKA, My HUMBLE Namaskaras to your lotus feet. I have been reading all your posts and each sentence from you is enlightening. I was in real shame after reading your reply to my questions. Although I was reading the posts, I never had the confidence of writing again. You killed my EGO with your simple wonderful answer. I have not come across a person so far with your knowledge, simplicity, humility, modesty and enlightenment-even people who have crossed 70 years!! I wonder how a person who is just elder to me by 5 years can be like you. I have to LEARN a LOT from you but do not want to disturb you. How is your health? Please write something-atleast one or two lines everyday for all of us. With HUBLE Pranams to your feet, your BitterTRUTH 25th NOV 2011 19:50 Name: Mahesh Country: India Comment: Dear Asmitha madam yor experiance where different. plsshare your latest if any Name: buy cipro Country: Afghanistan Comment: Thank you so much for this great webite! It is very informative. Name: buy provera Country: Afghanistan Comment: Thank you so much for this blog! Information that I found here was very usefull for me=) Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your HOLY LOTUS feet ANU AKKA. First thing I do is to BEG your pardon for not replying so long. AKKA I spent nearly an hour in sincere Prayer and all along I imagined your feet in mind. i got the ray of light. I treated the symptom myself. That is with some reason made HIM cancel his India visit. Only HIM and ME know what happened. I fasted completely on 30th July and took Blessings from all Sumangalis of both families. I missed you a lot. Though I did lot of Namaskaras in mind and thoughts to your feet, I strongly felt. I missed physically doing you Namaskarsa to your feet. But the main issue remains as it is AKKA. I need your help for solving it. I will soon answer your questions and take your BLESSINGS for solving my problems. After reading your posts for Shalini, I realized how UNFORTUNATE I am. If everything was OK, even I would have got the rare opportunity of doing padapooja of husband before marriage. Please BLESS your Unfortunate sister AKKA. Pranams again. Rani 16th Oct 2011 10:09 AM Name: motrin online Country: Afghanistan Comment: Thank you very much for this article! This information was very usefull for me=) Name: flexeril online Country: Afghanistan Comment: Thank you for this information! I used it for my diploma thesis =) Name: Saroja and Vikas Country: India Comment: SV2: With our humble Namaskaras to your divine feet again ANU AKKA, our 3rd question: You have said that you were unable to post certain things and waiting for indiaparenting team to resolve the same. As we saw it is not resolved yet. We pray to you to post the same information and enlighten us. please take that trouble for us. we are not comfortable till we read those divine words from you which are missing. 7:59 PM Name: Saroja and Vikas Country: India Comment: SV1: Dear ANU AKKA, Please accept our humble Namaskaras at your divine feet and BLESS us. One of our friends suggested this link and we both started reading all posts. It went on beyond 2 AM today. We do not know when we finished and our experience cannot be expressed in words. We are eagerly waiting for your answers for all pending questions from everybody. We pray to you to enlighten us by answering questions which are not specifically put to you also. We are husband and wife and 4 days back came to know that we will be parents of first child in about 7 to 8 months. 1. Although we know that both of us cannot call you AKKA, we are unable to find a solution to our dispute. please guide us. 2. Our family elders are telling that we should strictly abstain for atleast one more year. Our Doctor friends tell differently. We will go by whatever you advice. Please do not mistake us for putting this question. We know you are above that. Once again our Namaskaras to your divine feet. 11th Oct 2011 7:43 PM Name: KAVYA Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA (SDK) 8: Pranams to your ENLIGHTENING feet Anu AKKA. Please take enough rest. I tried my best to find what made you so tired. All are tightlipped. What happened. Our entire family is unlucky again this time AKKA. We tried all possible roots to invite you on one of the days of this DASARA for SUMANGALI POOJA. We did not have any luck. I know that even during this year's Dasara, around 30 to 40 lucky families have done your Pada pooja as a part of Sumangali Pooja ritual during Dasara. Please bless our home also AKKA. With Pranams your SDK 5th Oct 2011 (11:50 PM) Name: Country: Afghanistan Comment: Simple but interesting blog post I must say. I've just added your RSS to my google reader! =) Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 3: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. Waiting for your Ashirvads and Answer AKKA. It is very important and urgent for me. I have lost my mother few months ago. You are my only hope for a very tough situation in my life. -Chetana 2nd Oct 2011 9:00 PM Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 9: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Waiting humbly with all devotion for your ASHIRVADS AKKA. This is only expressing my Pranams to you in this forum. But I always imagine your feet and do Namaskaras to your Lotus feet whenever I do the same to my mother everyday. AMMA is telling me, the more I wait, more I will get from you, but I should not loose hopes. Pranams AKKA. Your LITTLE brother MANU 02nd Oct 2011 09:45 PM Name: risperdal Country: Afghanistan Comment: Great post I must say. Simple but yet interesting. Wonderful work! Name: buy lexapro Country: Afghanistan Comment: Great post I must say. Simple but yet interesting and engaging. Keep up a good work! Name: Country: Afghanistan Comment: Thx for this great information that you are sharing with us!!! Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sheela A1: Dear Sheela, Ashirvads. Please post your questions. I will try my best to asnwer. Anu 21st Sep 2011 (10:13 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SHOBHA A1: Dear Little Sister Shobha, Ashirvads to both of you (your DH & you). All the best for for Married life. Your (both your DH and you) views are maturing and that is the reason both of you are INVOLVING in the act of NAMASKARA rather than going thro' the same as a mere formality. PATIENCE is the solution for most of rifts between husband and wife. Ankita is right. As per my knowledge, wiping husband's feet with hair as a part of Padapooja is a practice of Bengal. Anuradha has to confirm if she is from a different part of India so that we all can update ourselves with the information. I understand you are from Karnataka since you mentioned Bheemana Amavasye. As you know, I cannot write now as I used to do earlier since I am a pregnant. I will write whenever it is possible for me. -Anu 21st Sep 2011 (9:43 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: TA 4: Dear Little Brother Tarun, Ashirvads. I will answer all questions. Now that Prober has also a question about the action between Ajinkya and his sister, I will take up all questions one by one. I was recovering from tiredness for so many days. I will try my best to complete all answers before I proceed for my delivery as my parental home does not have Internet connection or PC. Or if the elders decide that my delivery will be here in Bangalore, I might get some more time. After so many days I am trying to go thro' all posts. It is huge list of questions. -Anu 21st Sep 2011 (9:03 PM) Name: ankita Country: India Comment: There is a bengali culture on wedding night when husband and wife spends first night together wife has to wipe husband's feet by her hair after washing with water. Name: Tarun Country: India Comment: annu akka , I am eagerly waiting for ur next post for me. Name: SHOBHA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA, Please accept my devotional Namaskaras to your lotus feet and Bless us. Me and my DH are having better understanding and almost no rift or quarrel after following your footsteps. Although I did Namaskara to my DH feet every morning and night as per my MOM (and MIL too) instructions, it got diluted and stopped later as my DH was not acknowledging properly after a month or so of our wedding. Now I started again and my DH also responds with real concern and involvement whenever I do Namaskaras to his feet in morning and night. Our relationship has really improved. He did not find time and asked me to convey his Namaskaras to you. I am using my friend's office PC as my PC is down. I am interested to know if you have come across wiping husband's feet with hair as mentioned by ANURADHA. We are used to wash our husbands' feet and drink that water.. when we do Padapooja on the day of Bhimana Amavasye, wedding night, first day in in-law's house, after Arundhati Darshan in wedding etc. But wiping with hair I have not come across. One more thing. Congratulations. Many schools have organized MASS pada pooja of parents by their children. When I found it in one school recently, I came to know that the management was influenced and inspired by your views. I checked the internet to find so many. But you are not writing regularly now a days. Please write and keep enlightening all of us. 16th Sep 2011 Name: lexapro Country: Afghanistan Comment: You have really interesting blog, keep up posting such informative posts! Name: Sheela Country: India Comment: Namaskaras to your ENLIGHTENING feet ANU AKKA. I had posted earlier on 2nd JUNE requesting TREESA for updates about her son's present attitude etc. No reply from her for 3 months. Can you spare some time for us amidst your busy schedules? It would be a great help if we (my DH and me) get some of your precious time to understand more about our own culture. 6th Sep 2011 Name: seroquel Country: Afghanistan Comment: Thanks for tris interesting information! I found it very useful =) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet ANU AKKA. I thought to be the first one to do Namskaras to your feet on TEACHER's DAY and switched on PC after 12:00 in midnight. But already Kavita and mohan have done it!!!! How is your health AKKA. You did not post for a long time. After reading Latest post of KAVITA, I am getting the same doubt. Should I consider you as GURU or AKKA? Your answer alone can clarify my doubt. Pranams AKKA. -Vani 5th Sep 2011 (12:47 AM) Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam from both of us. I did not let my Patidev post today because he was posting as mohan-(Kavita). Till you clarify that point, I won't let my Patidev use such name. Tomorrow is Teacher's day and We are placing our heads on your HOLY feet for Ashirvads. My MIL is so happy to get original Ramayan shloka in DEVANAGARI. She told us to consider it as SACRED and learn it's message from Learned and Enlightened SOUL like you. We have a confusion. Should we call you or treat you like DIDI / BHABHI or GURU. Please write whenever you find time. We thought that you may not write again for several months. But if you do not mind, were you busy for so many days or you needed total rest? Pranams to your HOLY feet again from both of us -KAVITA mohan 4th Sep 2011 9:43 PM Name: anuradha Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, I am telling my experience. My husband is 2 yrs younger to me. We did love marriage. But on the day of wedding I had to touch my husband’s feet and on wedding night I touched my husband’s feet and washed his feet by water and consumed it and wiped his feet by my hair. It is too much embarrassing to me because I had to perform all thing in presence of everybody. After the marriage, My MIL told me that to touch my husband’s feet every morning and night and in some occasion, she orders me to wash my husband’s feet and consume the water. Even if senior guests come to our home, after touching their feet I have to touch my husband’s feet. Otherwise my MIL directly tells me to touch his feet. It is too much humiliating to me. I am not doing it willing because my in law is younger to me. Touching senior of ender’s feet is ok but touching husband’s feet (if he is junior to me) is not always a good manner . Name: EffifyAgreesy Country: Afghanistan Comment: penmilmirmtup dkyugbwvfcn Occarnecicsax Name: Anu Country: India Comment: KMS 1c: I tried to post it on Krishna Janmashtami (You expected it on Ramanavami), But I was too tired. Finally I am posting on Ganesh Chaturthi. More Later. -Anu 1st Sep 2011 (11:27 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: KMS 1b: nAhaM jAnAmi kEyUrE nAhaM jAnAmi kuNDalE| nUpurEtvaBijAnAmi nityaM pAdABivaMdanAt|| Name: Anu Country: India Comment: KMS 1a: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. Sorry for taking so long. The original Ramayana Shloka you asked is here. Please type the same in "Baraha" software to get the shloka in Devanagari. The transliteration is like this: -Anu 1st Sep 2011 (10:27 PM) Name: buy prednisone online Country: Afghanistan Comment: Really interesting blog, keep up the good work! Name: someone Country: India Comment: what ritual ur daughter likes MR.rijab? Name: lexapro online Country: Afghanistan Comment: Really great article with very interesting information. You might want to follow up to this topic!?! 2011 Name: raj Country: India Comment: Anu akka, where r u? Name: rajib Country: India Comment: someone,my daughter really likes what my son do.she said that she is the luckiest sister in this world.she enjoyed the worship richual more than my son. Name: someone Country: India Comment: Mr.rajib does ur daughter having any problem because her view in tat is also very important Name: bijan Country: India Comment: mr. rajib, do your son lick her sandal sole clean while massage her feet? does she ever footslap on his face? Name: rajib Country: India Comment: someone,he always do that in front of us. Name: someone Country: India Comment: Mr rajib when ur son has started doing this?will he do privately ? Name: rajib Country: India Comment: my son touches his head on his mother's feet everyday. but he never wash her feet and drink.he only do that to his little sister.actually,my wife is also not comfortable in case of her feet,but in case of our daughter,she and my daughter is comfortable.i know,washing little sisters feet and drink,or massage her feet while she placed them on his face may sound redicilous but it also true that he respect her like a goddess.he lay under her feet for hours while her sister watching tv or study and rub her sandal sole on his face.and if the main target of all worship is to improve your character,then i have to say,he is successful.sorry for my poor english again. Name: someone Country: India Comment: Mr. rajib is ur son worship his mother also? or only his sisters? Name: rajib Country: India Comment: pranam to your feet anu akka.my english is not good,please forgive that.i am a middle aged man.i have a 16 yr old son and 14 yr old daughter. my problem is about my son. he is a very good boy from all aspect and very good student also,but is different from normal teen age boy.he is religious and respect girls very much.he always respect us,but the problem is he too much respect his little sister too.he always does her room cleaning and everything.he touches her feet everyday.when i ask,why he do that,he told because she respect girls and according to hinduism girls are the creative power of the universe,so boys should respect girls.a few months ago,just before his board exam he start to wash her feet and drink.when i ask him why he do that,he said according to veda,we can worship god in any object or person.he is a normal person,so it is difficult for him to think about god in non livig thing.and as saraswati is a goddess, it is easy for him to thought about her in his sister.so he worship his sister everyday,wash her feet and drink.according to him he follows the same worship procedure like kumari puja where girls are worshipped as durga.he does a very very good result in 10th board exam.so,i cant say anything to him and he continues his richual.now a days,when my daughter watch tv or something,he just lay under his sister's feet and massage her feet while she placed her sandaled feet on his face.my daughter or wife supports my sons activity,but i am confused.is he right or wrong in his logic?am i stop him from doing this?i repeat,he is the best son one may have from all other aspect,including study.please advice me.pranam to your feet again. Name: vimax Country: Afghanistan Comment: hi!,I like your writing very much! share we communicate more about your post on AOL? I need a specialist on this area to solve my problem. Maybe thats you! Looking forward to see you. xyxytodwhy.2011 Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 6e: How did you keep quite about that ACTION of Ajinkya? Is it because you thought that he should not be disturbed during his exams and you wanted to post something about it later? Added to this, there are so many people in this forum who have been THANKFUL to discussion between Ajinkya and you. In our family and CIRCLE, it is believed that such action would amount to SIN. How can you knowingly allow somebody who is seeking the "LIGHT" from you to continue commit SIN? Please forgive me if I have hurt you. 14th Aug 2011 12:15 PM Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 6d: We do "Namaskara" to these items if our foot accidentally touches them. Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 6c: I am very very sure that you are aware about this TRADITION. Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 6b: Now LONG PENDING QUIZ 2: This is about Ajinkya's posts placed between VARALAXMI's "ANU AKKA(VL) 4" dated 15th April, and your post "Ajinkya 10 (which should have been Ajinkya 11 as corrected by you immediately) dated 17th April 2011. Ajinkya wrote that he would make his sister "TOUCH HIS PEN WITH HER FEET". Is it not wrong? We WORSHIP BOOKS, PEN, PENCIL and other EDUCATION / KNOWLEDGE related items during Navaratri considering all of them to be a form of GODDESS SARASWATI. Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 6a: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. At last I got my sister's permission to post my QUIZ 2. There was so much argument at my home. Anyway my QUIZ 8: How do you know that I am a boy? Was it simple guess or you simply called me "LITTLE BROTHER" without thinking or you were SURE about it? If you know it for sure, may I know how? I know that you are quite intelligent. Please share the secret Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 8: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Sorry AKKA, I did not reply to you immediately. As I told you earlier, we do not have PC and Internet at home. Yesterday morning I used the same neighbour's PC but there was a power cut by the time I finished (In fact ALL of us including my neighbours) reading the posts. I am so happy that I received your ASHIRVADS at last. I am also proud that you called me "Manu" as my mother does. For others you have asked before addressing them with short sweet names. I am the first to receive such ASHIRVAD from you here WITHOUT such ASKING. I have no words to express my joy about that. I am from Bangalore and Kannada is my mother tongue. Unfortunately my knowledge about Kannada literature is very less as I studied in English medium. I am eagerly waiting for your Ashirvads again AKKA. Your LITTLE brother MANU 08th Aug 2011 10:40 PM Name: jesus loves you all Country: India Comment: hi to all my bro's and sis's.i am 20 year old,indian,orthodox christian.i am studying science and religion and want to be a scientist.i am shocked that some still follow these indian old customs and traditions till now.most of these were made by selfish people for selfish reasons.i also agree that there are some good things like respecting elders,but its stupidity to respect their age.their experience and knowledge should be respected.things like touching feet are symbols of inequality in indian culture where one is superior and other is inferior.there is no such thing as flow of enegy through feet.there is no scientific evidence for it.also there is no archaelogical or historical evidence for mahabharta or ramayana.i can prove my points with evidences.so,plz have scientific attitude and stay away from these meaningless customs.adapt western lifestyle where everyone greets others by hugging or hand shaking which feels everyone with love and equality.looking for your comments-john Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sindhu Anu 2: Dear Gopi, Ashirvads. Please FAST. Reasons etc. later. -Anu 29th July 2011 (11:08 PM) Name: Sindhu Country: India Comment: SINDHU 3 - Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your LOVELY ENLIGHTENING feet. Have no words to express my devotion towards you for your BLESSINGS. I showed these views to my DH and then my MIL. Then we decided to show all people. IT WAS A HAPPY ENDING. Huge numbers added to your devotees club. I should have posted much earlier. We were waiting for your reply to Shalini. WONDERFUL. Again it is my humble limitation to use the word WONDERFUL. It is really impossible to express our feelings in words. Your preechings are so powerful and effective. All elders in our family are surrendered to you. Elders who had scholded my MIL said SORRY to her!! and me also!!! My DH GOPI will continue... Hello BHABHIJI, Infinite Pranams to your feet. I do not know if addressing as BHABHIJI is correct. My betterhalf is shy to ask a question and handed over the keyboard to me. Long back, I had decided that I would FAST along with her on BHIMANA AMAVASYA. Now that she is unable to fast, why should I go back on my decision? She is arguing that it would be a great embarrassment if she eats her normal diet and I fast the entire day. Why should it be?? Do you have similar experiences? Please BLESS us through your enlightening REASONED answer. If you do not have more time, a short answer FAST or DO NOT FAST is enough for the time being. Details later whenever you find time. Pranams from both of us again. -Sindhu Gopi 29-JUL-2011 20:33 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Shalini A2: Dear Shalini, Ashirvads. Continuing.. A2, A3: A girl after engagement (or even after both sides agree for an alliance prior to formal engagement) is classified as "VAGDATTAA" in our culture. The concept is that marriage is a pending formality and a matter of time. The time gap is for the reasons like 1. Marriage preparations 2. Auspicious date and time (i.e. LAGNAM) suitable for the horoscopes of bride and groom. Hence according to the older generations, a girl is supposed to start learning for her married life after her engagement. Situation like the one you are under at the moment, i.e. engagement before ASHADA and marriage after ASHADA so that Bheemana Amavasya falls before marriage, while the GROOM is FIXED is usually rare. Try to think from the point of view of older generations like that of your grandmother. They really considered husband as their GOD and dedicated much more towards their husbands compared to present generation. Very few girls will get that OPPORTUNITY to do Pada Pooja of their Groom before marriage on the auspicious day of Bheemana Amavasya. That is the reason for your grandmother to say that you are FORTUNATE. Now answer to your Q2: It depends on you - whether you consider this situation (which very few girls get), as an OPPORTUNITY and FORTUNE or BITTER COMPULSION and MISFORTUNE. It is all your state of mind. ALL the best. I think that Q4 and Q5 are not emergencies. If you feel so please let me know. -Anu 29th July 2011 (9:53 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Akshay A2: Dear Little brother Akshay, Ashirvads. I will sincerely answer all questions. It may take some time but all questions would be answered. Shalini's question was to be answered before Bheemana Amavasya i.e. 30th July 2011. -Anu 29th July 2011 (9:12 AM) Name: Akshay1 Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka, 1000 pranams to your precious feet.I hope you will answer my questions too. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Shalini A1: Dear Shalini, Ashirvads. I repeat again that I am a normal human being. I do not know what makes people like me so much. I suggest you that instead decorating my feet with drops of honey....do the same thing to your own mother. Now coming to your questions.. A1: Since you do not have any fear that your marriage would be called off or cancelled, just proceed and do the PADA POOJA of your would be as a part of Bheemana Amavasya celebrations as per practices in your family. You might have already done Namaskaras to his feet several times by now (Some times in front of everybody and some times when only you and him are present or when none of the known people are around). Pada Pooja is just an extention. Your involvement and dedication in the process is important. We used to make fun of our grandparents when my grandma used to do Namaskaras to grandpa's feet with lot of difficulty due to aging in spite of grandpa telling her not to bend. Just make an observation - People who are making fun, are not making it only about your supposed Pada Pooja to your would be, but lot many things. For example when you receive his phone call or parcel / letter or you mention about his name while conversing etc. Just try talking about a particular sweet item liked by your would be and observe their reaction. Making a girl or boy about to be married (and even during marriage) to feel SHY (and internally HAPPY) is a part of our culture. So learn to ENJOY (These pre marriage FUNS will be only once during your life time) instead of feeling EMBARRASSED. Will continue. -Anu 28th July 2011 (7:07 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Rani 5: Dear Rani, ALL THE BEST and Ashirvads. Be brave. I am with you. I will keep checking posts continuously today. -Anu 28th July 2011 (12:03 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Prob 2: Dear Little brother Prober, Ashirvads. You are a very good person by heart. You do not intend to disturb Ajinkya during his exams by your question. But as stated by you, Ajinkya's exams must be over by now. Or he may not be checking posts of this forum these days. Otherwise also, Tarun has already put a question about the correctness of whatever Ajinkya is doing. Hence I feel that you can put forth your QUIZ 2. I will probably answer all your questions today. -Anu 28th July 2011 (11:55 AM) Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your HOLY LOTUS feet ANU AKKA. I was a fool and did not check for your posts yesterday. I will follow your advice and pray to almighty. I feel that you are my goddess who is accessible to me. I will update you every 1 or 2 hours. I am really blessed that you have BLESSED me at the end of your recent post. You have not done it so far to anybody that is doing ASHIRVADS at the end of your post. I strongly believe almighty is helping me thro' you. PRANAMS AKKA -Rani 28th JUly 2011 9:16 AM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 18: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. You have made me proud by your results. Keep performing better and aim at achieving something at University level next time. With hard work you will be able to achieve the same. About Lunch and Dinner invitations -- Why should you escape from them ? Those invitations are from the HEARTS of people who are extending the same. Whenever such invitations are disturbing your studies or other activities seriously, politely explain the situation to hosts and they would oblige as they did during your exams. Those invitations are for the good qualities they have found in you or in a broder sense, the society around you has found in you. YOU HAVE THE RESPONSIBILITY TO RECIPROCATE APPROPRIATELY. Getting Love and Affection of so many people is a fortune. Maintaining their confidence over a long period of time is a CHALLENGE. That would go a long way in the life of a successful IAS officer. For your information, my situation is not different. For the first time after so many days, I am eating at our house. Though it is a practice in our circle to extend an invitation for lunch or dinner to a Sumangali when she gets pregnant for the FIRST time, they are doing it to me during my second prgnancy. There is so much rush and with great difficulty, my MIL has arranged for my rest today and tomorrow (both from office and other invitations). They like me so much that the senior ladies of the house where we are invited "FEED ME BY HAND". It is like having so many MOTHERS. I have mentioned a bit of it already in my post labeled "Vani 13" dated 3rd Mar 2011. If the rush of invitations is so high that it is impossible to cope up with, then let me know so that I can think of some solution. I feel that it is within reasonable limits in your case as on date. -Anu 27th July 2011 (2:08 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Rani 4: Dear Rani, Ashirvads. Be brave. I have already told you that your problem can be solved. I need the information pending from you to suggest you properly. You have to maintain your cool. If needed, take the help of your aunt. You can also pray to GOD (whomever you are devoted to). Prayers help lot of people to get confidence, concentration, focuss and courage. I am not going to office for two days. In fact I am not going out at all. Just resting at home. I will check for your posts every 1 to 2 hours. You should also do the same thing. We may need several interactions for an effective solution. ALL the BEST and ASHIRVADS. -Anu 27th July (10:45 AM) Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS feet ANU AKKA. I have to answer two more questions you asked me. As I posted earlier, whenever I try, I loose control and start crying. July 30th is only 4 days away. He may land any moment. So far he has not informed anyone his landing schedules. I am loosing my sleep imagining DOING his Pada POOJA. Please BLESS me to get enough strength and courage to express myself AKKA. Please advice me as to how I should express my answers to you. Your unfortunate LITTLE sister Rani 26th Jul 2011 11:32 PM Name: Prober Country: India Comment: PAA 5: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. Please take rest. This is only a reminder. I had posted a month back. Thanks for your post "Sindhu Anu 1 dated 10th July 2011 at 8:10 PM. My sister who is here for delivery had similar dilemma and it is clarified to her and other family members beyond any doubts. QUIZ 7: May I know Why you ask some people about their place and mother tongue like Ravi Pandit, Manoj etc. Once you have answered Rakesh that you want to be identified as "INDIAN". 24th July 2011 3:18 PM Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet ANU AKKA. Here is your little sister again. Exams over, Results out and I have topped our college. Sorry that I did not post immediately after exams. We had visitors continuously and I have to keep my interaction with you secret. My father is so much impressed with your posts. I had saved this page and showed him OFFLINE. He left for attending his job yesterday after finishing his holidays. We have been continuously attending to Lunch /Dinners. It is not stopping even now AKKA. Can you guide me to come out of it. Sorry again but I have never missed doing pranams to your feet in my mind and thoughts on a single day / occasion also. My original questions are still pending AKKA. But please guide me to stop these Lunch /Dinner invitations. Pranams AKKA. -Vani 24th Jul 2011 (8:46 AM) Name: Pragya Country: India Comment: Any Akka 2 (your earlier reply labelled Prag 1) Anu Akka, pranams to you! Sorry for delay in replying as I was on a break. My replies are as under, please read and help. 1) I am a boy. 2) I had an argument with my bhabhi couple of years ago and my brother/bhabhi stopped talking to me while we were staying at the same city. Earlier this year, I had a dream abt a big puja in a hall with 100s of people with my bhaiya n bhabhi in front row before the deity. I approach my bhabhi after the arti and touch her feet and she forgives n blesses me, later I touch my brothers feet. A month after this dream, I called my brother and he invited me for a annual puja at his place...the whole dream happened there in reality and I felt bliss while on my knees at my bhabhi's feet. No past discussion but I think she forgive me. I consider them my gurus now and feel happy at their service. 3. I am married. 4)by serving I mean as an obedient disciple 5) i am employed with permanent source of income. Pls guide ......Pragya 14th July (9:50 am) Name: srini Country: India Comment: respected Anu akka sasthang namaskaars to ur divine holy feet as u said i will definitely visit there in my spare time n try to find a book but do u know which publication it is ? so it is easier for me?(13-7;8.15(a.m) Name: Akshay A1 Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka,1000 pranams to your precious feet.Yes I am a different Akshay. I read your posts to Tarun. But I just wanted to know if it is fine for my sis to touch all the parts of my body with her feet. In your post its not mentioned which all parts of the body were touched by her feet. Is it fine if my sis places her feet over my privates and blesses me? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: srini A5: Dear Srini, Ashirvads. The Kannada Periodical I mentioned in my post to Ravi Pandit (labeled RP 1) is most probably "Manjuvani". If I remember, it was monthly. It was subscribed by our neighbours. As I mentioned, it was around 20 years back. If you go to Dharmasthala for Darshan, please visit the concerned Printing Press and request them for old issues of "Manjuvani". If they have maintained the old issues by binding each year's issues into one or in any other systematic manner, it would be easier for you to search. You may have to go with reasonable SPARE TIME, as you may have to search issues of 6 to 8 years. 20 years I mentioned is approximate and I am not sure if it was an old issue or a new issue when I read it. If you are able to trace whatever is needed, you can request for the contact details of the author of that DHARAVAHI and find out from the author about the source he / she used for writing that Dharavahi (the version of Mahabharata), so that we can trace the ORIGIN. In the mean time, I will try sourcing the same informaton from archives of old books as and when I find time. Thanks a lot for the interest you have shown to trace the information, which would be useful for everybody. -Anu 11th July 2011 (9:30 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Akshay A1: Dear Little brother Akshay, Ashirvads. Please read my recent posts addressed to Tarun. There will be one more post for Tarun about touching the body parts with Feet or placing foot / feet on head addressed to Tarun. The same answer would be applicable in your case. Please wait till next post for Tarun. There is one more Akshay who had asked me about touching Bhabhi's feet. I think both of you are different. Please confirm. -Anu 11th July 2011 (8:46 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sindhu Anu 1: Dear Little sister Sindhu, Ashirvads. Your MIL is right. You do not have to observe any FAST. In fact do not alter your food intake by slightest extent. Participate in all other POOJA on account of Bheemana Amavasya. Do children below 10 years (or 5 years) fast on other occasions like "Sankashti" in your family as the elderly people do ? It is impossible. Cite the same example and take the elders into confidence. You cannot make the YET to BE Born Baby in your WOMB fast. It will be worst SIN if you do so. You will not be eating for your sake, but for the Baby's sake. Pregnant women, Lactating mothers, Children who are not yet strong enough to fast, Aged people who cannot sustain the FAST, People who are SICK etc. are exempted from fasting. It is a matter of COMMON SENSE. For your information, I AM NOT FASTING. None in our family, parental family, Friend CIRCLE fast on occasions described above. A married woman can perform PADAPUJA to her husband on any day, any moment according to our scriptures and tradition. So, GO ahead and do PADAPUJA to your husband on Bheemana Amavasya. For any other clarification, please feel free to post again. -Anu 10th July 2011 (8:10 PM) Name: Akshay1 Country: India Comment: hi Anu Akka,1000 pranams to your precious feet,I have a question related to touching body parts with feet, on rakshabandhan my elder sister makes me lay down on the floor and blesses me by touching all my body parts with her feet and she doesnt even spare my privates.She says that she does this for my own good.Is it ok to do so? She does this only on rakshabandhan.But i feel humiliated by the fact that she is touching all my body parts with her feet. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Manu 1: Dear Little brother Manu (Manoj), My heartfelt Ashirvads and all the best in your studies and career. Please convey my Pranams to your mother. Sorry for the delay in replying you. I will answer all your questions; But before that, can you just tell me about the place you are from and your mother tongue. -Anu 10th July 2011 (7:47 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: hemanta 1: Dear Little brother hemanta, Ashirvads. Please read my just concluded post labeled "kusha 1". Please read all the posts I suggested to kusha and get back to me. -Anu 10th July 2011 (7:40 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: kusha 1: Dear kusha, Ashirvads. Question raised by you is already discussed at length in my replies to mohan, Akshay, Ananya, ganesh and hari. Please read my post labeled "Sanjay 5" dated 28th March 2011. As I have already mentioned in my reply to "mohan", if your Bhabhi (Elder brother's wife) is undeserving for receiving your Namaskaras, it is a different issue. Bhabhi is considered as one among "PANCHAMATA" in our tradition. I have also written about my experience when I entered our house after my marriage (My BIL & SIL being elder to me touching my feet). Please go thro' all posts. Discussion with Ananya & Akshay regarding this would have continued but they were satisfied with my first post itself (Sanjay 5). I had some more ideas but I stopped as they were satisfied. What one has to consider for touching somebody's feet is "Elder in Relation" concept. Most of the time, "Elder in Age" is also "Elder in Relation". But many times there would be exceptions. After satisfying "ELDER in RELATION" criteria, one has to check if the person is "DESERVING ENOUGH" to receive the Namskara. If you have any further doubts after reading the posts I have suggested, Please get back. -Anu 10th July 2011 (7:15 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, I will start answering all questions from today / tomorrow again 9th JUL 2011 (7:50 PM) Name: Sindhu Country: India Comment: SINDHU 2 - Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your LOVELY ENLIGHTENING feet. I will state my problem now and seek your blessings URGENTLY. I have come to my mothers's house for two reasons. 1st one is my 1st ASHADA after marriage. 2nd is for delivery. It was mid 5th month when Ashada started and I will return after delivery. My husband's side are orthodox with more traditional mindset. My mother asked me to talk to my MIL about the FASTING to be observed by me on Bhimana Amavasya on 30th July 2011. That is for me to practice from now itself since I am pregnent. Otherwise it is our practice to observe TOTAL fast on that day. We also observe fasts on Sankashti etc. but that is not total fast. My MIL is the youngest DIL of family and liberal. She told me that I need not fast but asked me to keep it a secret as other elders in the family would make it big issue. The matter somehow leaked and I do not know what to do. Some elders telephoned and warned that it is my FIRST Bhimana Amavasya after marriage. So Complete Fasting is a MUST Otherwise I cannot do my husband's Padapuja. They scholded my MIL also. Please help me AKKA. My husband and MIL are telling me not to care for them but We are afraid. Pranams AKKA. 6-JUL-2011 21:25 Name: Sindhu Country: India Comment: SINDHU 1 - Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your LOVELY ENLIGHTENING feet. Simply Wonderful AKKA. I tried to search internet for a problem of mine and landed here as per my friend's suggestion. Do not know how to thank her. To night I will post my problems AKKA. Pranams 06-JUL-2011 19:40 Name: CommonSence Country: India Comment: Congratulation. May god bless you. 04/07/2011 3.00 Name: Shalini Country: India Comment: Shalini 1: Pranams to your HONEY FEET Anu AKKA. I read all views several days back. I showed it to my parents also. We have been watching so many programs on TV and attending discources. TO BE honest, nobody has impressed all of us to the EXTENT you DID. I would like to decorate your feet with drops of HONEY, directly consume the whole thing as PRASADAM as a part of performing your PADAPUJA. I got engaged few days back. Have a problem similar to RANI. Marriage will be in mid September. I am told that I have to do Padapuja to my WOULD BE on Bhimana Amavasya before marriage itself. I have grown watching my mother, aunts, grandma all doing it. No problem to wash my husbands feet and drink that water and do his padapuja BUT after wedding. Doing it before is embarrasing. All my cousins younger and elder are making fun now itself. Q1. What shall I do? Q2. Is it unfortunate that I got engaged at this time so that Bhimana Amavasya falls before my marriage? Q3. My grnadma says I am FORTUNATE. What is your opinion? Q4. I was also told that it would be a padapuja without washing feet. Nobody is telling me the reason. If you have any reasoning, please tell me. Q5. What are your experiences? Your own or from your circle or seen or heard (regarding doing padapuja of husband before wedding). PS: I don't have any fear that marriage would be called off or cancelled as RANI's case. Please answer well within Bhimana Amavasya AKKA. Also if possible put the posts you intended to addressing Sangeeta about Bhimana Amavasya. Pranams again AKKA. 1st July 2011 13:50 Name: Akshay Country: India Comment: hi Anu Akka,1000 pranams to your precious feet,I have a question related to touching body parts with feet, on rakshabandhan my elder sister makes me lay down on the floor and blesses me by touching all my body parts with her feet and she doesnt even spare my privates.She says that she does this for my own good.Is it ok to do so? She does this only on rakshabandhan.But i feel humiliated by the fact that she is touching all my body parts with her feet. Name: hemanta Country: India Comment: anu akka pranam to your feet.every day i have to touch my bhabi's feet who is five year younger to me.i am 25 and she is just 20.is it oky. Name: kusha Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA PRANAM ON YOUR FEET.should a boy toch his bhabi's feet who is younger to him? Name: kusha Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA PRANAM ON YOUR FEET.should a boy toch his bhabi's feet who is younger to him? Name: kusha Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA PRANAM ON YOUR FEET.should a boy toch his bhabi's feet who is younger to him? Name: srini Country: India Comment: anu akka pranams to ur divine lotus feet i was also curious to know about ravi pandit que if that book is available now in dharmasthala i can get that book because my native is in mangalore (26/6 9.PM) Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 7: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Waiting for your ASHIRVADS. Amma told me that you need lot of rest now. You can bless me whenever I deserve the same. Pranams AKKA -Manoj 26th Jun 2011 12:20 PM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: RP 1: Dear Little brother Ravi Pandit, Ashirvads. 1. If you searched the web already, there is no point to repeat the exercise from my end. 2. I have seen this in a very old Kannada Movie. Heard that it is shown in a old Telugu movie. 3. This forum does not allow any weblink or email address to be entered as a part of our comment (I was told so by the young boy from the close circle - I mentioned about him as developing/ working on a website / personal blog for me. in my post timed 27th Apr 2011 8:28 PM). Please try entering a weblink or mail id and confirm it. I am using an old PC with WIN 2000 IE 6. May be you can try in different OS and browser and check. 4. But I have read it in a serial (DHARAVAHI / TodarKathai) from Kannada periodical published from "DHARMASTHALA" when I was in Primary school (20 years back). I have also heard it from the grandparents' story. If we contact the author, we will be able to get the Source or the specific version of Mahabharata, which contains it. 5. It is not shown in Mahabharata TV Serial. Please label your posts and / or mention date - time so that we can refer to them easily in future discussion. You deserve a lot of appreciation for your seriousness about everything I am writing. Which place are you from and what is your mother tongue ? More later. -Anu 24th Jun 2011 9:20 PM Name: Ravi Pandit Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka, pranams to ur feet..... " Many ladies including Gandhari touched their feet to various body parts of Duryodhana who was bound by the "PASHA" of Chitrasena (during Duryodhana's Gosha Yatra) to free him and failed in their attempt. Finally Draupadi had to touch her feet (after Gandhari's REQUEST) to various baody parts of Duryodhana and RELEASE him. "... I have never heard about this..can you point me to some references about this on the web? Name: prober Country: India Comment: PAA 4: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. I had a question about the same post of Ajinkya that Tarun has just now stated but different. I did not want to post it till Ajikya's exams got over. You can check in my very first post. My "Quiz 2" was stopped by my sister. I asked Ajinkya to confirm if his exams are over. He may not be checking for these views now a days. As I check, Ajinkya's said post after completing two of his papers is in between 15th and 17th April 2011. By this time his exams may be over. Will you permit me to put my question? 23rd Jun 2011 1:20 PM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: TA 3: Dear Little Brother Tarun, Ashirvads. I will discuss the points mentioned by you in your latest post (post in between "PAA 3" posted by prober and "Prag 1" posted by me) after completing your previous question. Now continuing with my earlier post addressed to you.. There are many incidents from our EPICS (History) and Puranas giving the details of a person placing his / her feet on other's head or body part. 1. LORD Rama placed his foot on AHALYA to end the curse she was undergoing in the form of a STONE. 2. LORD Krishna placed his foot on Parikshit (when he was born DEAD due to BRAMHASTRA of Ashwatthama) and got him the life. 3. Nahusha kicked sage Agastya, which resulted in severe curse. 4. Many ladies including Gandhari touched their feet to various body parts of Duryodhana who was bound by the "PASHA" of Chitrasena (during Duryodhana's Gosha Yatra) to free him and failed in their attempt. Finally Draupadi had to touch her feet (after Gandhari's REQUEST) to various baody parts of Duryodhana and RELEASE him. Will continue -Anu 22nd Mar 2011 (9:39 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Prag 1: Dear Pragya, From the information provided by you, I am unable to understand the situation. Please answer the following questions: 1. Are you a Boy or Girl ? 2. Why do you feel you have to serve your Bhabhi forever ? 3. Are you married or unmarried ? 4. What EXACTLY do you mean by SERVING your Bhabhi forever ? 5. Are you employed with permanent source of income ? I will wait for your reply to proceed with the discussion. Please Label your posts and mention the date and time so that we can refer any previous posts easily. -Anu 22nd Jun 2011 (8:40 PM) Name: Tarun Country: India Comment: Dear Anudidi pranams, ".Every morning I place my head at her feet to take her blessings.Before going for my exam I make her touch my pen with her feet by placing it at her feet and then I kiss her feet and make her place her feet on my head and bless me.This makes her very happy and she blesses me whole heartedly."-This was posted by Ajinkya, .So according to what you said, dont you think this wrong practise.Also I saw that some people saying they want to drnk the water which was used to wash ur feet and kiss your feet etc.All this are wrong or right practise .please clarify didi. Name: prober Country: India Comment: PAA 3: Sorry AKKA, I forgot, QUIZ 5: Do you have any further posts for hari? QUIZ 6: My sister says you have conquered "ARISHADVARGAS" I want your honest detailed posts even if you are under progress, the extent of progress and your efforts and techniques 22nd Jun 2011 9:44 AM Name: prober Country: India Comment: PAA 2: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. I thought you would never answer my questions. Thanks for finding time. Your answer to Tarun is Wonderful (All your answers are wonderful) I am eagerly waiting for your further posts to Tarun. Is there still something?? More quiz. QUIZ 3: I did not understand your answer to BitterTRUTH about June 10th. NO Emergency. Quiz 4: Do you respond only to posts specifically addressed to you? I mean you have not so far answered jayanthy (her last question) & sou just because they did not address it to you. Why? 22nd Jun 2011 9:36 AM Name: Tarun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu didi, pranams .I am happy that you called me little brother.I am happy finally you found time to answer my question.I have shown it to my sister .She went through the entire postings and apologised to me. She just wanted to show that she was elder to me and hence the powerful.She cried and said lot of sorrys and also asked for forgiveness from you too. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear prober, Ashirvads. You have not done anything wrong hence no question of forgiving. Feel free to put any question. Both my parents are younger in age to my MIL (obviously my FIL). Hence both of them touch the feet of my MIL & FIL on all occasions as per practices in our families. There is hardly any difference between the practices in our family and my parental family. But why do you think that this question would DISTURB or TROUBLE me. Whatever is the fact, will be stated here. For your further info, my FIL touches my MIL's elder sister's and her husband's feet on all occasions. My MIL's elder sister is younger to my FIL in age but ELDER in relation. Once again, please feel free to post any question. -Anu 21st Jun 2011 (7:52 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: BT 1: Dear BitterTRUTH, Ashirvads. No question of taking you (or anybody) wrong. In FACT, I appreciate you for being so attentive about everything. It is true that I cannot START on 10th June (barring emergencies, I can discuss this later, though it may not be needed). But I can START on 9th June 2011 evening / night and ARRIVE on 10th June 2011. Hope I have clarified. I never availed leaves all these days. Even for our Gruhapravesha (and works related to construction), I took only FOUR days leave. THIS is possible only in SOFTWARE industry. My company / I adjusted the work in such a way that I "WORK FROM HOME". All I needed while I am away from the office is my Laptop and Wireless Internet connection. Please feel free to clarify anything. -Anu 21st Jun 2011 (4:36PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: TA 2: Dear Little Brother Tarun, Ashirvads. I hope you have read all my posts addressed to Ajinkya. Please read them if you have not read them already - Please read the Post Labeled "Ajinkya 5" in particular. In your scenario, you are the FIRST party, your sister in the 2nd Party. In our culture, if anybody's body (including feet) is accidentally touched by our feet, we say SORRY and touch their body and touch that hand to our heart / eyes / forehead. (Should I TERM this act as "BODY NAMASKARA" ?) This is done even if the other person is younger to us. In our family, if the person is otherwise eligible to receive a Namaskara, we actually bend down and touch the feet and not the body. In the reverse situation, we touch their head and complete the formality. For Example, if my feet accidentally touch my MIL; I bend down, touch her feet... On the other hand, if my MIL's feet accidentally touch my body part, she touches my head with her right hand and then touches her right hand to her heart / eyes... Even in the act of Namaskara, 2nd party will not touch his / her feet to FIRST party. It is the First party who touches the feet of 2nd Party. Forget accidentally touching feet - we are not supposed to cross over any other person's (or ANIMAL's) body part even if we can CROSS over (or JUMP over) without making our feet to come in contact with that person's (or ANIMAL'S) body part. When Bheema was asked to CROSS over the tail of ANJANEYA, in Mahabharata (when he was on his way to collect Saugandhika Flowers for Draupadi), he refuses to do so and asks Anjaneya to remove his tail and give WAY instead. He does so without the knowledge that the person laying there was ANJANEYA. Bheema was not even ready to CROSS over the tail of an ordinary MONKEY. This is the guideline for all of us. I need 2 to 3 more posts for answering you completely. Will continue -Anu 21st Jun 2011 4:10 PM Name: Tarun Country: India Comment: Anu didi pranams, I am very much comfortable with act.Its ultimate way of showing submission is what i felt.But kindly share your views .She insist that on me becuase she loves me alot and says she loves to bless me to the core.Kindly tell me your view on the same. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: TA 1: Dear Little Brother Tarun, Ashirvads. I will answer all questions sincerely with whatever little knowledge I have. No questions will be ignored. I agree there is a delay due to circumstances. Coming to your question, 1. Do you want just a general discussion ? or 2. you have any specific problem from the act of your sister and you are looking for a solution ? I will discuss with information about placing the foot over head. But if you are looking for any solution in your case, please answer these questions: 3. Does your sister insist the same with all youngsters or only with you ? 4. Does she insist the same from your mother or other Elders when she touches thier feet ? i.e. request them to place their foot on her head and bless her. 5. How old is she ? 6. When did such "INSISTING" start ? 7. 7. According to you, what are the reasons behind it ? 8. Are you uncomfortable with such act ? -Anu 17th Jun 2011 (9:34 AM) Name: servant Country: India Comment: Dear Goddess Anu i wish to serve You as humble servant of Your reverend Feet . for me and all of us here You are a Goddess. Goddess please tell me how can i worship Your reverend Feer. Name: srini Country: India Comment: respected anu akka sashtang pranam to ur holy feet.Congrats and take care of ur health and plz bless us from ur divine feet yours ashirvaad is so important for us pranams again akka.(Jun 15-11)8.50a.m Name: BitterTRUTH Country: India Comment: Anu Akka, Can you really come on 10th June as posted my your MIL? How can you get so much leaves in software industry? Don't take me wrong. But there is no COMPARISON possible to your knowledge and enlightenment. My sincere NAMASKARAS to your feet for your knowledge and enlightenment. 13th Jun 2011 Name: Tarun Country: India Comment: Congrats Anuu didi, Although you have not answered my quiery, you still enlightened us all on many different things.Now you will have an enlightened baby in a few monthstime. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. CONGRATULATIONS. I have the distinction of congrtulating you first in this thread. -KAVITA 8th Jun 2011 9:20 PM Name: sou Country: India Comment: thing is my nanands behaviour has always been bad towards me. she wants to dominte over me as well as my hubby. that is just not going to be possible. also i have been following my mil's commands since 7 years for now . n now its too much and m not going to listen any of there orders i had enough of this for years. 7th june 2011 Name: sou Country: India Comment: namaste! i have been reading this article. my story is like this..after marriage my sasuma asked me to touch my nanand feet. i followed it. but my nanand is 2months younger to me and was married before me.so i being elder to her as well as wife of her elder brother; actually she should touch my feet but no my MIL as well as nanand want me to bent so that they dominate over me. at times i have explained that they are wrong and trying correcting but they say since she is daughter of this family i should bend down. so what m i not bhabhi of this house ,i have to get my rights.they are doing it purposly as they have said and faught regarding all this. my father in law is against this. evn he thinks my nanand should touch my feet . all in vain. so this time my husband is goin to look into this matter and he agrees me. but still i want strong points to help me out.being savashini at occassions also she never touched my feet.i m hurt all the time. this is not a tradition in hindu, is it? Name: Anus MIL Country: India Comment: Dear All, There is a sweet news. My Dear ANU is CARRYING. It was detected on 31st May. Immediately she left for her mother's house for certain rituals and having some REST. She will be returning by 10th June. I appeal to all of you to be considerate and put only emergency questions. She will need complete rest for many more months. She will be tired with her office work. I take this opportunity to thank all fans of My Dear DIL. 5th June 2011 Name: Pragya Country: India Comment: Anu Akka...you have been a guide to many on this subject and hence deserve a lot of respect. Infact I have experienced real bliss and positive vibes while doing pranams at my bhabhi's feet and even sought forgiveness (in my mind) for past deeds and that has made me light in mind and spirit. I want to serve her forever and would like to start with Gurupurnima this year....what are your thoughts?? Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS feet ANU AKKA. i am not able to express myself AKKA. I have to answer two more questions you asked me. But whenever I try, I loose control and start crying. It should be my BAD fate that even after getting a BEST person to solve my problem, I am unable to GET the solution due to my own inability of controlling my emotions / express my problems before you. July 30th is fast approaching and I am loosing my sleep imagining DOING his Pada POOJA. Please BLESS me to get enough strength and courage to express myself AKKA. Your unfortunate LITTLE sister Rani 4th Jun 2011 12:20 AM Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 2: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. Please answer my question AKKA. It is emergency. 3rd Jun 2011 8:58 PM Name: Sheela Country: India Comment: Wonderful content. Anu AKKA deserves special appreciation and thanks for the value add. We have recently returned to India from US with sole intention that our children should grow amidst our culture. QUESTIONS for TREESA MADAM - What is the result /progress with your son? Is he now comfortable washing your feet? What are the occasions in your family which require the act of washing the feet? Please share your experiences. 2nd JUNE 2011 Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 6: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. This post is just to show that I checked for your ASHIRVADS, not to disturb you. My mother has told me that I should humbly wait till I get a reply. At times I feel that if I learn the technique of making my mother relax soon by pressing her legs, I will be spending less time in that act. But my mother gets better relaxation. I am confused. Please BLESS me with PROPER way to analyse. Everyday whenever I do Namaskara to my mother's feet, I am doing the same to your feet in my mind and thoughts. Pranams AKKA. -Manoj 1st Jun 2011 1:24 PM Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 7: Anu AKKA please be kind to us and consider our problem as emergency. You have ASSURED "Rani" that her problem can be solved but telling me that our case is "very very tough". I really do not know the reason for the same. My sister will have to undergo those unplesent VADHUPARIKSHAS again by the end of June. I just started HATING HINDU culture. I love my sister so much and assured her that I will somehow find a solution for her PAINS for which I am totally depending on you. -Your Little Sister VARU 31st May 2011 (1:30 PM) Name: srini Country: India Comment: amit brother how u worship ur sister? Name: amit Country: India Comment: sashtanga pranam to your lotus feet goddess anu akka.i am very happy to see that you have replied me.i will continue to worship my younger sister...pranam to your lotus feet again... Name: amit Country: India Comment: sashtanga pranam to your lotus feet goddess anu akka.i am very happy to see that you have replied me.i will continue to worship my younger sister...pranam to your lotus feet again... Name: amit Country: India Comment: sashtanga pranam to your lotus feet goddess anu akka.i am very happy to see that you have replied me.i will continue to worship my younger sister...pranam to your lotus feet again... Name: amit Country: India Comment: dear sethu,i am from west bengal.i have done pada puja to my little sister regularly.i even drink the water after washing her feet.i had started to worship her when i am in class 10 and she was in class 8. i am poor student then,and my character was also not good then.our guruji told me to worship her. from then everything was changed dramatically.i become a good student and my character also improved.so,i worship her everyday now. Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 6: Continuing AKKA, I am sorry again that I forgot to thank you for trying to stop preferential treatment for BOYS (you have advised Arun about it). Now answering your questions, there are no senior people with orthodox mindset living with us (they are living separately). We are only four, My parents, my sister and myself. But my mother has experienced tourtures of all kind at the hands of her MIL i.e. my GRANDMOTHER before separating. She feels that we being girls should be PREPARED for all HUMILIATION and touture in husband's house. Wants to show that the bride is HUMBLE and DOWN to EARTH. Our family circle and community expects the same (I feel most of the Indians expect it from BRIDES). She tells us that we have to simply Obey the instructions of MIL or any senior from Husband's side and FALL to the feet of people they tell us to. OK, we will have no option but why people who will never be related to us?? For this she tells that all the people in our marriage and post marriage will not be related to us. What to do? My sister crys after learning about being REJECTED from the boy's side. This has happened more than 20 times till now. How can I reduce her pain? Please help me AKKA. Also I want to know what you would do in case of your daughter or younger sister. Your little sister VARU 30th May 2011 (9:46 PM) Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 5: Sorry Anu AKKA that I am replting after a long gap of 11 days. We were not in station. You are right AKKA. My sister and myself do not have problems in touching people's feet from GROOM's side after the alliance is confirmed provided the Groom also touches the feet of people from our side (Bride's side). Or should I say, we will be very happy to touch the people's feet from groom's side, if the groom touches the feet of our side. Otherwise also we will do it because WE HAVE TO DO IT - NO OPTION. But at least we will not have the WEEPING mindset for doing it as the alliance has already been fixed. You have provided excellent examples of Gandhiji & Bhagat Singh for making me realize that VADHUPARIKSHA itself never existed in our culture few decades back. Your family, circle and DH all deserve great appreciation. One must be lucky and blessed to get such family / circle / DH. In my opinion, no Indian girl would hesitate to touch the feet of people from Groom's side wholeheartedly. -Your Little sister VARU 30th May 2011 (9:22 PM) Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. DIDIJI, Please don't get angry with me for the questions I am going to ask now. If you find it wrong, forgive and bless me with the Ashirvad that will prevent me from such acts in future. BY this time, you might have shifted to your New house. As what I understood so far, totally seven people are staying at your home including your son. I also feel that the New house belongs to your husband and yourself (at least in technical sense). That is the reason you are doing the Padapujas of Sumangalis during Grihapravesham. Otherwise, your FIL and MIL should have done it. (This is my guess and understanding - I am from North India as mentioned earlier) Now my question is who all are shifting to new house. All seven or only 3? Are you separating? One day everybody (or at least most of us) separate. How do you handle financial aspects at that time? DIDIJI, I know that your heart is broader than OCEAN. Even if you do not get angry (Mostly you may not due to your unlimited forgiving nature) please BLESS me with the right way of putting these questions at least and answer these questions. Whatever you follow will be a GUIDELINE for millions of people. I had a problem with my browser (IE 8) and changed it to Firefox today. From Next time I will label our posts. There is one more "Mohan" who is posting in this forum. My Patidev is telling me that his name would be mentioned in future as "mohan-(Kavita)" for the purpose of differentiating. I am feeling totally awkward. How can my Patidev get the IDENTITY thro' me. But he told me that you would approve it. Please clarify me on this point. Once again PRANAMS to your HOLY feet and waiting for your BLESSINGS and FORGIVING. -KAVITA mohan 30th May 2011 (1:15 PM) Name: tarun Country: India Comment: Ann akka, pranams kindly dont ignore my question. Name: hari Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka pranams to ur feet as u say its only my past memories i have to do whenever i go to their house and while leaving pranams again.May 30 8.30 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: amit 1: Dear amit, Ashirvads. As I have already mentioned India is vast country and practices vary from region to region, community (caste) to community and even family to family. It is mentioned first in a post addressed to Arun (between 14th Jan 2011 & 27th Jan 2011) and repeated in a post addressed to KAVITA (timed 19th Mar 2011 8:59 PM). I hope you have read all posts addressed to Ajinkya. I have mentioned about "anEkAMtavAda" of Jainism. In matters like this we cannot conclude that theere is one and only one correct answer. There may me many answers which are correct. I will continue. Need to attend some urgent work. -Anu 29th May 2011 (2:40 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Hari 4: Dear Little brother Hari, Ashirvads. What is the problem then ? You do not expect Namaskaras from your Bhabhi. Is it only a feeling of discomfort whenever you have to do Namaskara to your Bhabhi's feet (because of the past memories) ? Is it on a daily basis or once in a while like festivals and important occasions ? I do not know what is followed in your family. Please update me. I will post in detail after that about some of the concepts of EIR. -Anu 29th May 2011 (2:08 PM) Name: Sethu Country: India Comment: Dear Amit Pls give some more information’s so that Anu didi can help you. I heard in north brothers touch younger sister feet too. Pls let us know where are u from, on which occasion you have to touch your younger sister feet, and other than touching do you have to do padapuja to her in some occasions etc Name: hari Country: India Comment: anu akka sorry for not putting date n time its 28-05-11(11.45)pranams Name: hari Country: India Comment: respected anu akka pranams to your holy feet and seeking blessings .yes your points are true i dont mind if she was unknown and in 3 point i dont expect her to do namaskara to me Name: amit Country: India Comment: lots of prnam to your holy feet anu akka.you said that people should touch the feet of elders only.But in our family the condition is different.I bow down to touch my forehead to my younger sisters feet.Is it wrong?am i should stop it? Name: amit Country: India Comment: lots of prnam to your holy feet anu akka.you said that people should touch the feet of elders only.But in our family the condition is different.I bow down to touch my forehead to my younger sisters feet.Is it wrong?am i should stop it? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Hari 3: Dear Hari, Ashirvads. I will summerize what I have understood this way. Please correct me if I am wrong. 1. You do not have any problems with DOING Namaskaras to your Bhabhi's (Elder brother's wife) feet if she was not known to you (or more specifically no relation of the kind "touching feet" existed between you) earlier REGARDLESS of her age. 2. The problem has started within your mind beacuse your Bhabhi was touching your feet earlier and now it is REVERSED. 3. Even now you are ready to do Namaskaras to your Bhabhi's feet but you also feel that she should also do Namskaras to your feet. Your answer to this third point is very important. Will continue after getting your answer. -Anu 28th May 2011 (11:30 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: IF 1: Dear Iftekhar, I will answer you in detail after answering Tarun. Please read all posts addressed to Tarun henceforth and relevant posts as needed. -Anu 27th May 2011 (8:58PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: US 3: Dear Little Brother Udaya Shetty, Ashirvads. You have mentioned that you have read all previous posts. Please read the future posts addressed to Tarun & Iftekhar without fail. If time permits, read Posts addressed to Ajinkya Carefully. MOST IMPORTANT: DO not forget to INTROSPECT your actions, conversations, emotions & thoughts on a daily basis and try to improve yourself. If needed, you can discuss with me. You can INTROSPECT for a period of around 15 days (or a month) and observe the changes yourself. If you are lucky, you might observe the changes in a week also. All the best. As I mentioned earlier, I will inform whenever a Pravachana is held in Public. -Anu 27th May 2011 (8:50 PM) Name: Udaya shetty Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka,1000 pranams to your precious feet.Thanks for finding time to write those enlightening words.I am trying to follow all the 3 phases of ahimsa.But i am just a normal human being i might fail. You said you are just a normal human being, that because of your modesty. For me you are more than that and I strongly believe that if you touch my tongue with your feet it will prevent me from saying anything that hurts anyone.Infact I want you to keep your feet on my head and bless me so that I even my thoughts dont hurt people.And if you tie me a rakhi that will prevent my hands from hurting anyone.Please Anu akka i would be really greatful if you accept my request and tough my tongue and head with ur precious feet. Once again pranams to your feet . Udaya shetty - 27 may 11:45am Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 5: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Please answer my questions AKKA. Just a reminder. I know you have to answer Too many people. Answer at least about the technique of pressing LEGS & FEET so that I can make my mother relax better. She is so much tired everyday. Pranmas again AKKA. -Manoj 27th May 2011 1:42 AM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: US 2: Dear Little Brother Udaya Shetty, Ashirvads. I will definitely inform if any Pravachana is organized in public. Please note very important thing that Namaskaras, Ashirvads, act of touching the toungue etc. can only act like VITAMINS for your GOAL (or any GOAL for that matter). But VITAMINS are not just sufficient. CARBOHYDRATES, FATS etc. are major components for making a living. Jainism which gives maximum emphasis on "ahiMsA" preaches that not hurting anyone has THREE phases i.e. 1. kAyA, 2. vAchA, 3. manasA meaning not to hurt from 1. Body, 2. Words and 3. Thoughts. What you are mentioning is hurting from words. To achieve that, achieving the 3rd one i.e. not hurting anyone in "THOUGHTS" is the foundation. If it happens at the level of your mind, words that would hurt someone will never come out of your mouth. You have that AIM. Introspect your actions, words and thoughts at a particular time regularly (preferably at the end of the day) and the light shows up within you. Keep doing this till the time we can meet and update your progress. Once again "If your thoughts are PURE and CLEAN, hurting words cannot come out of your mouth". I am a NORMAL HUMAN BEING. The question of considering if you are worthy for touching my feet or anything does not arise. You are WORTHY for receiving a RAKHI from me and I will tie the same to your wrist whenever we meet. PS: The points raised by you require more posts and discussion about what is the TRUE meaning of "ahiMsA". Let us discuss the same later, after completing emergency questions. Till then try to practice what I mentioned and update me. -Anu 26th May 2011 (10:30 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Little Brother Arun, Ashirvads. I will definitely get back after answering emergency questions. I will count and Label posts addressed to you also. I suggest you Write Date / time also as that would be very useful to refer previous posts in any discussion. We have seen how we had to struggle for refering a post in a reply to "srini" and now "Bindu" pointing that she has to refer a post neither labeled nor timed. I will get back to you ASAP. -Anu 26th May 2011 (9:50 AM) Name: Bindu Country: India Comment: BINAN 1: Dear Anu Akka, Pranams to your Lotus feet. I read all posts for the past four hours. Never in my life did I stick to one place and read like this - even while preparing for my exams. It is all due to your enlightening posts. I am from Karnataka - now staying in Bangalore. I am 22 and my parents have started searching for alliance. 1. Is it advisable to first get into a job before marriage? I have to ask few more questions - You have answered Arun that you are not sure about the feelings of the brides who did pada pooja to you initially (Your post I am referring is not labelled or dated. It is in between your posts dated 27th Jan 2011 and 31st Jan 2011), but later when the same people did the Pada Pooja to you, they did it happily. 2a. How do you know? 2b. Did you ask them? (or they told you) 2c. Why are you doubting about their feelings initially? You can conclude their action as either "wholehearted" or "under pressure and helplessness with total disliking or disagreement or hatred". 2d. How come you did it wholeheartedly in the initial stages itself? 2e. How did they become close and affectionate to you in such a short period? If there is any secret, please teach me. 3. We have a practice in our family that in Some of the Sumangali Poojas, the one doing the Pooja has to go to the house of each of the Sumangalis who will be worshipped next day and INVITE / REQUEST them to receive Pada Pooja by offering KUMKUM and ARISHINA and touching their feet. If it is not possible due to any reason with some of Sumangalis, they have to be invited similarly when they arrive by touching their feet before they enter the house. Do you have a similar practice? 3b. What could be reason behind such practice? I will put more questions after getting answers. -Bindu 26th May 2011 (12:15 AM) Name: Iftekhar Country: United Kingdom Comment: Dear Anu Akka, I'm writing to ask for your forgiveness. In the past I have laughed at the Hindu way of life and said some very disrespectful things. But I have read the articles on this website and I have been moved by the quiet dignity of everyone here. I realise that I have been a bad person. I wish to beg your forgiveness and place me head beneath your feet. If I could, I would kiss your feet but I live very far away. Anu Akka, please tell me that you have forgiven me, and in your thoughts, please place your precious feet upon my head. I wish to apologise to everyone here - Arun, Mohan, Hari, Varalaxmi, Ram, Chetana, Ajinkya, Nirmala - and would gladly kiss the feet of every Hindu person reading this. Though, given my past behaviour, I'm not sure that am fit to kiss the noble feet of any Hindu man or woman. I ask all of you to forgive me. Sincerely, Iftekhar. Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Anu akka 1. My question is pending. I know many other issues you have to solve. but I am also starts labeling as per your command. With a little proud I am saying you are like a real goddess for me. waitng for your divine words. Name: Mohan Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka,100 pranams to your feet.Anu Akka after your pravachan's can't you keep a 30 mins time for people like Udaya and others to pay homage to your feet,by touching them,by placing their head at your feet,or kissing your feet,or washing them and drinking the water. Name: Udaya Shetty Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka,1000 pranams to your lotus feet,akka I respect you a lot,once my toungue is touched by your feet I will think twice before saying anything, everytime I speak, your feet will come in my mind and I will be stopped from saying anything bad. I really feel that if you touch my tongue with your feet it will help me become a better person. Anu akka if you feel that I am worthy enough to have my tongue touched by atleast by one of the toes of your feet or even the nail of one of your toes , I would feel privileged .Would be a big blessing to me if you touch my tongue with your feet during or after one of your pravachana's.Please be kind enough to touch my tongue with your feet if you feel that i am worthy enough.Pranams again to your feet akka. Name: hari Country: India Comment: pranams to ur divine feet Anu akka i have 1 elder brother and elder sister.we consider all cousin as our brothers and sisters only.So there are many.No i wouldnt have considered her age if she was unknown to me Name: Tarun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu akka, Please answer my question .Is it ok to bless some one by placing feet on head. My elder sister always insits on it.I had posted it earlier but found no reply. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 9: Dear NIMMU, Ashirvads. I suggest you to label posts considering Sanjay's and yours as if from ONE PERSON because they are related to one another. In fact if any of your other family members post also in between about the topic under discussion, let the labels be uniform and continuous. I really do not have words on knowing that your Grand Mother is ready to accept whatever is finalized by me. I NEVER thought I would be so influential over Internet. BUT I need to discuss with SANJAY for telling anything on a matter like this. Please ask him to post ASAP. -Anu 19th May 2011 (12:38 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: US 1: Dear Udaya Shetty, Many Ashirvads. I will inform if any Pravachana is organized in public as I have already told harris. You are a very good person with the intention of "NOT HURTING ANYBODY" by your words. Namskaras to my feet or touching your TONGUE to my feet alone will not help to achieve that goal. I will discuss the other requirements in subsequent posts. -Anu 19th May 2011 (12:20 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Hari 2: Dear Hari, Ashirvads. Please tell me more about your family. How many brothers and sisters do you have ? Please specify how many are elder and how many younger. If there are any cousin brothers and sisters with whom the relation is maintained as OWN brothers and sisters, include them in the details. One more thing- If your brother had married a girl who was not known to you earlier, would you have thought about her age before FALLING to her feet ? -Anu 19th May 2011 (12:05 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Corrections to 2 of my recent posts dated 17th May 2011. Both should be dated as 18th May 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: VL 2: Dear VARU, Tell me more about your family members. Is there any senior with orthodox mindset ? You asked me in your first post about my experiences. First thing I would clarify is I DO NOT ENDORSE THE PRACTICE OF MAKING THE GIRL TO FALL TO THE FEET AT THE TIME OF VADHU PARIKSHA. Happy ?? That is a BAD PRACTICE which has some how sneaked into our culture few decades back. Earlier (few decades back), ELDERS of BOTH families decided the whole thing and there used to be a marriage straight away. Famous and well known examples are Gandhi and Bhagat Singh (The marriage was fixed by Bhagat Singh's family and he left home is a different matter). Subsequent to that also marriages used to be fixed that way. During those days, after fixing the marriage (by any senior members of the family), the boys' close relatives used to visit the girls' place just to see the girl (not to decide). The marriage was only a FORMALITY and the decision was irrevocable in almost all cases. The practice of girl (bride) touching the feet of senior relatives from Groom's side was a natural act considering our traditions and culture. But later, the Practice continued for all VADHU PARIKSHAS. As far as I am concerned, my MIL came to SEE me TWICE along with four more SUMANGALIS after announcing that the alliance was accepted. Thus, I did not feel bad about touching the feet of all of them. After reading your post, I felt that you (and your sister) have no problem with touching the feet of people from the GROOMS' side if the alliance is confirmed. Correct / Update me if I am wrong. In our family, the BOY (GROOM) also touches the feet of all elders from BRIDE's side whenever they are introduced even if it is a REPEAT exercise. MY DH (DEAR HUSBAND) did it and does it even today. Recently, during our GRIHAPRAVESHAM, people have praised him a lot for BEING so HUMBLE (being a MALE). But I agree with you about the practical reality you mentioned in your first post. More after your reply - Anu 19th May 2011 (11:37 AM) Name: hari Country: India Comment: Anu akka pranams to ur holy divine feet.yes akka she is married to my elder brother i dont say she is not deserving but from young age she used to take blessings from me now i have to fall to her feet.but after that she does take my blessings because i am elder than her in age.Pranams again to ur feet 18 May 2011(4.00 P.M) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Hari 1: Dear Hari, Ashirvads. Is your cousin you are referring here married to your elder brother ? Is she undeserving to receive your Namaskaras according to you ? -Anu 17th May 2011 (10:41 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: RAM 1111 7: Dear RAM 1111 Little sisters, My Heartfelt Ashirvads and ALL THE BEST for your exams. Update me with your results -Anu 17th May 2011 (10:24 AM) Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet. You must be busy shifting from old house to new house. Please BLESS us as our exams are about to start. Can't believe one semester has passed since knowing you. Every morning after getting up, we are doing a Namaskara to your lotus feet in mind and that is helping a lot in our studies. Your Ugadi message is SUPERB. Waiting for your Ashirvads- Pranams to your LOTUS feet again -RAM1111 12th May 2011 6:40 PM. PS: We will start labeling after exams. Name: Chetana Country: India Comment: CA 1: Namaskaras to your MOTHERLY feet ANU AKKA. I read all the posts since 3 days. Really wonderful experience. Please clarify one of my doubts on urgency basis AKKA. The doubt is WHO is the alternative for a person ELIGIBLE to receive NAMASKARA or PADA POOJA in case the original person is not available due to emergency? I am not able to put the question effectively. I will clarify. If a diciple has to proceed with important work in a GURUKULA, in the absence of GURU, can he do Namaskara to GURU's wife (GURUPATNI) in place of GURU and take her blessings? I tried reading a lot but failed to get an answer. All I could get is, "Once LORD Ganesha did Namaskara to his mother Parvati before proceeding to a war. He looked for his father and LORD SHIVA was not around. Then he requested his mother to SIT in his father's seat and did Namaskara to her feet again". Thus what I understood is, a wife can receive Namaskaras on behalf of her husband. I also read about GURUKULA thing I stated earlier. What are the other situations? Can it be vice-versa? Have you come across any such situations? I am a 21 year old girl Still studying. -Chetana 11th May 9:29 PM Name: Nirmala Country: India Comment: Pranams to your holy feet ANU AKKA. I will start labeling after talking to Sanjay if our posts togather are to be labelled serially. We are really blessed with your Ugadi message. After reading your posts and following your advice / preech, life has become very comfortable for all family circle. (Many times due to better relation and understanding, love and bonding among ourselves) Sanjay took an outstation project and away after 7th April. Mobile is hardly reachable to that place. Please consider answering question about his marriage as urgent. Our GRAND MOTHER is telling that she will accept whatever is finalized by YOU. My children are showing fantastic progress in learning. Touching my feet EXCLUSIVELY regularly. My Motherhood fills will abondunt JOY. I always imagine my mother's feet in mind while blessing my children. Your points for school selection are eye openers. All of us in family are dreaming to do your Pada Pooja at least once in life DURING Dasara AKKA. Please do not refuse. Please answer about Sanjay's marriage ASAP AKKA. Pranams. -NIMMU 9th May 2011 (3:25 PM) Name: prober Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA, Sashtanga Pranams to your feet. Im 22 completed engineering and searching a good job. Till then temporarily into teaching. Read your posts and shared with my sister who is 26. Can't believe this kind of knowledge, intelligence, technique etc. from a person of your age. Also can't believe such effective PRAVACHANA at the age of 21. Although my sister scolded me for what I am going to do hereafter, I am going ahead and to trouble you with questions which I hope would disturb you. My sister considers you as GODDESS. If my parents come to know these questions to you, they will sure HIT me. But my nature is like that. I hope you will forgive me if I am wrong. Now 1st quiz : Between your parents and PILS, Who touches whose feet? (you have mentioned so many combinations earlier but avoided this I believe) If none touches any's feet also it is OK. I want answer. quiz 2 : My sister is not allowing me - Dear Ajikya - Please confirm if your exams are over Name: Udaya Shetty Country: India Comment: Hi Anu akka,1000 pranams to ur lotus feet, I have been reading ur posts for a long time now...i am staying in bangalore.... read that u have constructed a new house in bangalore.....would be a great honour if you could let me attend one of ur pravachana's and let me pay homage to ur lotus feet. Would be a great privilege to place my head at ur feet and take ur blessings.I want you to touch my tongue with ur feet,coz i feel that if ur feet touch a persons tongue he will never say any foolish things or words which wud hurt others. Name: Mannoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 3: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. Also AKKA, recently some priest was commenting that my mother being a widow, is not ELIGIBLE to receive PADA POOJAS without proper "Shanti". Why are widows treated as Second grade citizens in our culture? I told that priest that I am ready to spend 1000 births in HELL and asked him to keep quiet. Is there any such "SHANTI" with scientific meaning? I am feeling so bad that I did not worship my mother during my UPANAYANA when I was 6 years old. I did not even do a SASHTANGA PRANAM to her as she was not in the visinity and nobody told me. Was that correct and would it have been appropriate to do her PADA POOJA during my UPANAYANA? If so, how can I WASH AWAY that SIN now? My mother offered one more thing AKKA. She would receive PADA POOJA from me today if I solved improving Rakesh's comment in 15 minutes with hint. I was made to read posts here from BOTTOM to TOP and stopped after your HINT to "mohan". I am a small boy AKKA. How can I solve it in 15 minutes which none in this forum solve taking several days. Over and above, you youself said you would not have done it 4 years back (even after getting so many devotees from your GREAT KNOWLEDGEBLE ENLIGHTENING PRAVACHANA). How can I AKKA?? Please answer that question of "SDK AKKA" (her 2nd question after 1st April) about pressing LEGS and FEET. Please teach me the secret or technique. I Press my mother's LEGS and FEET daily. It will be really useful for me AKKA. -Manoj 8th May 2011 3:14 PM Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 3: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. I still remember those bad days when my father was killed in an accident. I have been doing namskaras to my mother's feet daily in morning, after POOJA and night. I started doing PADA POOJA to her on my birthday, Ugadi, Vijayadashami, Jan 1st (New year day) and previous day of commencement of my exams etc. four years back. I wash her feet and completely drink that water. Most of the time my friends would be watching. I wanted to do it today as I came to know that today is celebrated as mothers' day. My mother is refusing citing that Mothers' day concept is not from our culture. She says she would receive pooja from me today if you approve it as correct. You have once said that we as HINDUS should take everything GOOD from all directions. You have also said not to blidly "FOLLOW" mothers. I am totally confused. Please BLESS me as Lord KRISHNA blessed Arjuna. -Manoj 8th May 2011 2:35 PM Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 2: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. My mother's parents had expired long back much before her marriage. When my father died, both side relatives were not ready to take us as they thought both of us would be a liability to them. My mother was only 10th Standard pass (she was never allowed to study further by her uncle). Only relief was the house we were staying was not on rent but lease (mortgage) taken few months back and burden of paying rent every month was not there. Apart from that there was little insurance money. My mother brought me up single handedly doing all kinds of odd jobs like helping to cook, tailoring, mehendi decoration etc. along with taking postal courses from open universities. Today she is is post graduate and a lecturer (part time) in a private college. Our landlady was kind enough to extend the lease period twice without enhancing the lease amount. (FAR BETTER than our relatives) My mother was age barred for any regular posts when she completed PG. Even now, she takes private tutions in an acdamy apart from that part time job and earns something from tailoring also just for my education. Totally against taking loan for my education. I used to ask her when I was a small child why I do not have any brother or sister (to tie RAKHI). Two months back she told me she is going to get me one SISTER. Iwas surprised. We cannot afford a PC. Today she showed me this site on a borrowed PC. Our neighbours have gone out on a tour for two months and asked me to sleep at their home in the night and allowed me to use PC with internet. She asked me if I can ever dream to get a better AKKA than you. She had seen this site in her college. Do not have words AKKA. Cannot dream to get a sister like you in my next 100 births. -Manoj 8th May 2011 2:06 PM Name: tarun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu akka, Is it ok to bless some one by placing feet on head. My elder sister always insits on it. Name: Manoj Country: India Comment: M-ANU AKKA 1: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your lotus feet. I have finished my 2nd PU and waiting for results. Lost father about 14 years back. Since then my mother alone is taking care of me with both father's and mother's love and affection. I have to ask you one very important thing. My mother is not agreeing to receive a PADA POOJA from me today. (My 8th Mother's day) I will write detailed post as I am in a hurry to get certain things from shop and today being Sunday, shops work only half day. I have been reading all posts for almost three hours now discussing with my mother whatever I did not understand. Pranams AKKA. I will come back soon. Manoj-8th May 2011 12:30 PM Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhiji, pranams to your feet. We (my wife kavita and myself) are not sure if grihapravesham of your house is over already. today is the last day of 1st week of may. we guess, you must have conducted yesterday that is "AKSHAYA TRITEEYA". but anyway all the best. it is a wonder to know that you are constructing your own home in a 3000 sft site at this young age in BANGALORE. as learnt from posts here BHAIYA (your husband) must be around 32 and you are 27. please share your experiences which may be useful to all of us here. pranams bhabhiji from both of us. -mohan 7th may (9:42 pm) Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka Pranams to you holy feet. Akka the best for your grahaprevesha. Once your divine feet touches your home it will be lie temple for all your devotees including me( I wish I could be the 1st Devotee ) Hope I can touch the steps of that in future. Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka pranams to your holy feet i wish your new house would bring joy to you and tour family.pranams again Name: Rashmi Country: India Comment: AARSH 5: Dear ANU ATTIGE. Pranams to your HOLY feet. Do not have words to express for your advice about school selection. Simply great ATTIGE. We have been discussing the points given by you with our neighbors without revealing about you. A strong opinion is being formed among us and everybody is praising us which actually you deserve. Even parents who have already admitted their children two to three years back are in our group. My daughter finally raised that question - "Why she is told to touch only my feet" while others are touching the feet of all elders. My MIL explained her exactly on the lines of your guidance. Fantastic ATTIGE. My daughter is showing wonderful progress in learning alphabets, numbers, words etc. I am imagining my mother's feet in mind while blessing her. My heart fills with feelings beyond expression when she touches my feet daily (morning, night and beginning and end of her studies). Shocked to know the rush for including you in SUMANGALI POOJA. But no surprise. Your teachings are so powerful in a discussion like this. Must be much more effective and powerful in a direct interaction. Even the relation among our family members have improved (We can clearly notice) and misunderstandings vanished after Namaskaras are done with appropriate feelings. My MIL has been good. But Now she is like "I could never imagine MIL to be so nice". Even she tells me same thing ATIIGE. You have said earlier that you will give TIPS for better BONDING between MIL and DIL and share your experiences. Please ATTIGE. Both of us (My MIL and me) are DREAMING about how it would be. I started LABELING my posts and putting date and time as advised by you Pranams ATTIGE - Rashmi 5th May 2011 (2:40 PM) Name: KAVYA Country: India Comment: Sorry AKKA, I was so emotional. corrections to my just concluded post. 1. "tears" be replaced with "years" 2. "invite us" to be replaced with "invite you". 3. "Should the BLESSINGS of a person" to be replaced with "Are the BLESSINGS of a DIVINE SOUL" -SDK Name: KAVYA Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA (SDK) 6: Pranams to your ENLIGHTENING feet Anu AKKA. I have started labelling my posts as you suggested Varalaxmi. IT IS AN AWARD FROM YOU TO ADDRESS ME / CALL ME "SDK". All my family members are calling me that way and I am PROUD about it. I consider it as most precious BLESSING of my life. All you said is correct AKKA. I also know that two tears you avoided SUMANGALI POOJA SESSIONS citing your delivery and infant son. But now it has resumed again. One thing AKKA. Out of 30 to 35 SUMANGALI POOJA sessions you receive the pada pooja during DASARA, I have an idea that around 15 houses are always COMMON and repeated. Should only their homes see the PROSPERITY? Are they MORE BLESSED? Should the BLESSINGS of a person like you their personal property? What is our sin? Please do not get angry. Lot of us are longing so much to invite us to our homes. I begged MEENA Aunty to get you for at least ONE of the SUMANGALI POOJAs during my pre marriage / marriage / post marriage rituals so many times and she is not kind enough so far. LOT Many families are requesting for a similar favor AKKA. I will abide by whatever you conclude. If not DASARA, atleast other occasion AKKA.. Please. With PRANAMS YOUR DEAR SDK. Name: KAYVA Country: India Comment: Dear Vani, I have no words dear. You have won my heart and the hearts of all of my family members. We feel you have received the genuine powerful blessings of ANU AKKA. I can only wish all the BEST for your exams. (You will be reading this only after your exams.) and say GOD BLESS you. It is so nice to know that you consider me as your elder sister. You are really blessed soul. Being "NIMITTA" in the process of educating and enlightening others is possible only when you are blessed. It was because of you that we got reminded about Gandhiji's experience with his father when he confessed to him. We had just read and forgotten that long back. ANU AKKA's greatness is that she gives a message from anything and everything possible in such a simple and effective way that everybody gets convinced. Still it needs the right situation and right question. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Rashmi 7: Dear Rashmi, Ashirvads. Continuing about points to be considered for school selection: 9. It is an advantage to KNOW somebody in the school management or teaching staff PROVIDED children are NOT AWARE about it. 10. Sufficient play area within school premises is another criteria (Check the total number of children in the school and compare the area). 11. It would be a good point if the strength of children per class is around 40 (or 30). 12. Check if the school is burdening the children with LOTS of extra books other than those prescribed by the concerned board it is affiliated to. 13. It is usually (but not always) an advantage to admit children to schools, which are established since several decades (Those days running a school was not done for commercial gain). 14. Check the timing of the school (Some schools run lot of courses with staggered time table) and see if it affects your child's health in long run. 15. You must be wondering that all issues not related to teaching are being mentioned here. Unfortunately that is the hard reality in Bangalore due to MUSHROOMING of BPO (Call centers), which offer better pay packages resulting in shortage of good teachers in lot of schools. But you have to sit with the child up to certain stage and ensure that the child is on RIGHT TRACK. Once the Child is on RIGHT TRACK, he / she can study on his / her own and clarify the points not understood / doubts from others. The earlier the Child reaches that level, the BETTER. From then on you can keep a BIRDS EYE VIEW on his/ her friends circle / progress etc. 16. Many times it may be a necessity to shift your house nearer to the school of the children. 17. Do not ignore Government schools outright without careful consideration. If you need any further clarification, please feel free to write to me. I have to rush for GRIHAPRAVESHAM related preparations etc. -Anu 3rd May 2011 (1:36 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet ANU AKKA. I will not let tears to roll out of your eyes AKKA. I will make you feel proud about your little sister through my exam results. I will read your posts here only after my exams. PRANAMS again AKKA. -Vani 30th Apr 2011 (11:48 PM) Name: harris Country: India Comment: Anu akka pranams to ur divine lotus feet i am waiting for your satsnag pranams again.. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear harris, Ashirvads. It is not SATSANGA conducted by me. There are many groups of families and individuals who make an informal association and conduct such meetings (usually once in a month - mostly on a second Saturday as it happens to be a holiday for most). Each member would be hosting such meetings in turn on a rotation basis. Other members and the host are free to invite people other than members for such meetings depending the activity proposed for such meeting. The activity need not be a PRAVACHANA always. There would be other activities also. Earlier my MIL's pravachana was planned for that Sep 2005 Satsanga meeting. My MIL is a part time Sanskrit teacher with LOT of knowledge about our TRADITIONS, CULTURE, EPICS etc. One of my MIL's friends and a member of that group suggested that I will speack in place of my MIL and all the members approved the same. (It was after they came to know about my conversation with my MIL when she came to formally "see the BRIDE"). I do not have any specific intention of delivering or not DELIVERING pravachanas in future. Everything depends on the conditions and situation. I will inform the details of TOPIC, date, time and venue if I am delivering one well in advance. -Anu 29th Apr 2011 (9:43 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Rashmi 6: Dear Rashmi, Ashirvads. Continuing about points to be considered for school selection: 4. Enquire if the school uniform, books etc. are sold by school itself or from a single outlet. In these cases find if the prices are reasonable. If not, the school's motto is simply making money. It is good if multiple outlets are available for uniform and books. 5. Enquire about complete financial issues up to 10th standard from school office and the parents who have already admitted their children there few years back. If the expenditure is not in accordance with your economic condition, simply skip that school. It is preferable that most of the children of the school are from comparable / similar economic background. 6. Sometimes, majority of children from a particular area will be studying in the same school. It is an advantageous situation for approaching the management collectively about any issues. Other advantages are exchanging the Notes, Home works etc. in the event of the child remaining absent for a few days. 7. If there is any parents' association, it is a very good point. 8. Strictly AVOID schools with specific religion related teachings / influences (which contradict what you teach children at home), with long term ulterior motive of religious conversions (Specially schools which get funds from foreign countries for that purpose). Similarly avoid schools which impose codes which are against the culture you follow at home (Like telling girls not to put BINDI or use flowers, bangles etc) Will continue further. -Anu 29th Apr 2011 (9:05 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Arun, Ashirvads. I will get back after answering emergency questions. May be in 2nd week of May after our GRIHAPRAVESHAM is over. -Anu 29th Apr 2011 (7:15 PM) Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Akka lots of pranams at your divine feet Pls reply to me. Everyone is expecting the same I am Sure. Name: harris Country: India Comment: anu akka will u resume your satsangha in future..want blessing from your feet.pranams to ur feet Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Rashmi, Ashirvads. Now my views about points to be considered for school selection: 1. School should be within 1 to 2 kms. of distance from your house (nearer the better). Otherwise children loose their precious playing / relaxing time in school van or bus or your own transport. It is not a matter of few days. It is for a long period of several years. 2. It is not a good idea to select a school where parents are interviewed or it is a great task to fix an appointment with HM or principal or management or book the seat months in advance or use of high influence needed for getting a seat etc. These SHOW OFFS are made to create a GREAT impression about the school; but in my opinion such schools are mainly into money making. 3. School teachers/ HM / Principal or management should behave like humans and not super humans and always accessible for good suggestions from parents. -Anu 27th Apr 2011 (9:17 PM) Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Akka I am blessed. pls repl to my post Am I right ?? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear srini, Ashirvads. Arun is right. I have stated it myself in a post (unfortunately I have not labeled it or mentioned the date and time). Please search for 'more than 100 times' and you will get it. -Anu 27th Apr 2011 (8:44 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear humble, I do not have a website or blog or facebook profile. I hope you have read all previous posts. As I stated earlier, after that Sep 2005 Pravachana, I never appeared in public. I had confined myself to very few LIMITED audience Pravachanas and discussions about the problems of youngsters (as stated by Kavya) within VERY CLOSE CIRCLE. One of my MIL's close friends suggested me to post comments in this forum. She was the one who selected this article and website. One young boy from the close circle I mentioned is developing/ working on a website / personal blog for me. I have not approved it as I do not have time. -Anu 27th Apr 2011 (8:28 PM) Name: ArunSrini Country: India Comment: Pls read all Anu akkas posts she only told the long back Name: srini Country: India Comment: pranams to your feet ANU akka wat is said by arun is true is ur feet washed 100 times? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SDK 3: Dear SDK, Ashirvads. Continuing further.. You must have already had the rough idea of all the facts I stated in my previous posts addressed to you. Only thing probably not noticed by you is the kind of pressure I get (and my MIL's friends get). I hope it is clear now. That is the only reason for this "AGYATAVASA". Now we have another problem regarding inviting people for our GRIHAPRAVESHAM to be held in 1st week of May (I am not specifying the date deliberately here). There is one section of people who are totally unaware about my Pravachanas like many friends, all colleagues of my DH (Thanks you for that new abbreviation), my BIL, Co-sister, FIL & all my colleagues, my old classmates, many neighbors etc. There is another circle where my PRAVACHANA of 10th Sep 2005 and subsequent developments are well known. We are struggling hard to carefully make 2 lists so that they are invited for separate sessions (morning and afternoon / evening). Otherwise the circle where I am moving like a normal human being will be disturbed. My MIL's friends are helping a lot in this regard. Please understand. I will answer some of your questions as I stated earlier, in subsequent posts. -Anu 26th Apr 2011 (8:18 PM) Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Anu akka lots of pranam to your divine lotus feet What are you??? As you have said you already got more than 100 padapujas . Which means including family members near 1000 people has touched your precious feet in devotion? Still you are simple like anything. Don’t have words to praise you. Also I am lil proud because I have praised your feet as divine first in this forum. Even that makes me happy and proud. I have one question pending from your side how many people had the luck to have the holy water which your divine feet is washed. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SDK 1: Dear SDK, Ashirvads. Continuing, Many times there are infuences and recommendations from my SIL's family, my co-sister's family, families of my MIL's co-sisters' parental homes, families of my MIL's SILs, my MIL's elder sister's family and relatives of all families mentioned. All for SUMANGALI POOJA conducted in their homes during DASARA and other occasions, which cannot be turned down. Since you have collected so much of information about me, you can understand the reality. It is practically impossible to accommodate all requests. That is the reason for Meena Aunty (or Saroja Aunty) to respond in negative for your request. Even All my MIL's close friends get lot of requests for getting my MIL and me for SUMANGALI POOJA but they avoid most of them, except their very close relatives and friends. Please understand. One of my MIL's friends even came up with the idea of organizing a SUMANGALI POOJA in a public place like temple. where more people can be satisfied but later that idea was dropped after learning the kind of RUSH such arrangement would end up with. I am a NORMAL HUMAN BEING and really do not know what people find in me. Very close friends of my MIL have arranged for CLOSED DOOR Pravachanas during DASARA or any occasion of their homes with very restricted entries and I have been asked to address that LIMITED gathering of 50 to 80 people. Except that I have not appeared in PUBLIC. Will continue. -Anu 26th Apr 2011 (2:48 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: SDK 1: Dear SDK (SUPER DETECTIVE KAVYA), I hope you do not mind if I call you SDK. REAL HATS OFF to your detective work without even giving a hint that you have contacted me in this forum. Had they known that you have tracked me here in this forum, they would not have revealed any information to you. Please understand dear. After that Pravachana, within 3 to 4 days, we were flooded with requests for SUMANGALI POOJA for DASARA days (My MIL, and me -if possible my mother also). If I remember, Dasara started very soon after that PRAVACHANA. As you know, we have to take food as a part of that SUMANGALI POOJA ritual. The demand from the close circle of my MIL was so much that it was practically impossible to satisfy everybody. We can utmost attend 3 per day if we have to take food. Some were ready for nominal / symbolic little food also. But how many can we attend per day practically in Bangalore ? It was my first year of marriage and hence we had to observe certain rituals at our home also. We have a practice of performing KANYA POOJA and SUMANGALI POOJA on different days of Dasara at our home. Besides, it was a very confusing experience for me (JUST 21 years old and being invited for pada pooja). As you know, entire house hold where we are invited fast till the pada pooja and meals of invited SUMANGALIS are over. All people including the senior most of the house touch the feet of all SUMANGALIS and I was the only younger one. Rest all were ELDER SUMANGALIS. I was not at all comfortable being a newly wedded bride to receive Pada poojas from so many. So there was no way but to HIDE ourselvws from PUBLIC. EVEN with that we had to attend not less than 30 to 35 Sumangalli Pooja sessions. (from very close circle of my MIL which cannot be turned down). That was the reason for not attending any SATSANGA meeting thereafter. Will continue. -Anu 25th Apr 2011 (3:30 PM) Name: srini Country: India Comment: i havent finished my exams akka not yet started joining date has to come...akka Name: srini Country: India Comment: anu akaa pranams to ur feet thanks for ur reply and take care of your health pranams again Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Little brother srini, Ashirvads. What is the matter ? Have you finished your exams and started with your job ? I have answered your previous question about cousin's wife. More relevant information is Rama and Lakshmana were only HALF brothers. So were his other brothers. Genetically Nakula and Sahadeva were not even half brothers to Yudhishtira, Bheema and Arjuna. WHO AM I ? I am not a blood relative of anybody here. It all depends on whether you consider your Bhabhi deserving enough. Consider her virtues and not the fact about own brother's wife or cousin's wife etc. She has left everybody, everything behind and joined your family. All members of her new family have a responsibility in building her confidence and making her feel that all of them are with her. -Anu 25th Apr 2011 (2:10 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 17: Dear Vani, Ashirvads and all the best for your exams. I will not scold you. When Gandhiji confessed to his father thro' a letter for all the mistakes he had done, his father reacted with just a drop of tear from each of his eyes. My reaction would be similar. At this juncture, you are more matured than what Gandhiji was when he confessed to his father. So, you know the value of time and the focus needed for preparing for your exams. You can always read all comments posted in this forum, after your exams. Nothing will happen to me. Even if something happens, you cannot do anything and that is the reality. So, concentrate well and study. All the best once again. -Anu 25th Apr 2011 (1:45 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Kavya, Vani, Dr. Rakesh & CommonSense, Thanks for your concern about me. -Anu 24th Apr 2011 (7:03 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, I have recovered completely now. Some tiredness still exists but it is OK. I will post comments henceforth as usual -Anu 24th Apr 2011 (7:00 PM) Name: CommomSense Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, What happened? Hope if it is food poisoning as speculated in forum will not be a big problem. I usually get a lot as my work involves travelling. may god bless you and help recover as soon as possible. best Regards CommonSense Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: what happend anu?anything wrong with your health? Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Dear KAVYA AKKA, Sorry I forgot to mention pranamas to you after considering you as elder sister. I was worried about ANU AKKA's health. If you know, please update. Pranams. -Vani 22nd Apr 2011 (9:07 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Dear KAVYA, How is ANU AKKA now? If you know, please write. Both of us are younger sisters of ANU AKKA and you are elder to me. Thus I would consider you as my other elder sister. Therefore expressing your gratitude to me does not arise. You decide what has to be done to your younger sister if you are OUTSMARTED by her and you have a great liking for her. -Vani 22nd Apr 2011 (1:06 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet ANU AKKA. Is what Kavya wrote about your health TRUE? How are you now? Please write one line AKKA. Otherwise we would be worried a lot. I had decided not to post anything here till completing my exams. Could not resist reading anything new from you. I know you will scold me for that. I promise that I will come back only after my exams but I just want to read one line about your health. Everyday after touching my mother's feet, I do Namaskara to your feet. Please bless me AKKA. But once you are alright, please write the actual secrets behind your maintaining BEAUTY. Please do not totally drop that question of KAVYA. Next time I will go through all posts and start labeling my posts. -Vani 22nd Apr 2011 (12:50 PM) Name: humble Country: India Comment: Dear Goddess Anu ji do You have a website or blog or facebook profile . i am really impressed by Your knowledge and simplicity Name: KAVYA Country: India Comment: Pranams to your ENLIGHTENING feet Anu AKKA. How is your health now AKKA? I heard you are recovering from stomach infection due to food poisoning. Is it True? I do not know how to thank you for confirming that IT is YOU whom I saw and heard in that SATSANG meeting and was lucky for having placed my HEAD on your FEET that day. AKKA please forgive me for some of my STUPID questions. But I thought that it was the only way to make you confirm about that meeting. I know your beauty has nothing to do with your knowledge or enlightenment. But you do not know how desperately lot of us have been trying to contact you AKKA. I am lucky that I was successful due to my cousin sister Smita. All my relatives are more eager to meet you after your posts to AJINKYA about the THOUGHTS and FEELINGS needed in our minds while doing or receiving Namaskara. All of us are realizing the POWER of the beautiful act of Namaskara when done with TRUE feelings. Our elders told us (my husband and me) to LEARN from Vani for her SMART demand for MESSAGE from you. Dear Vani, Do not know how to express our gratitude to you though you are much younger to us (I am 24, my DH is 25) for asking the RIGHT thing from ANU AKKA.... AKKA one more thing.. although jayanthy has not addressed her latest question to anybody and it is open to everbody, I request you to share your experiences. What ever you write will be enlightening. -KAVYA 20th APR 2011 (5:55 PM) From next time I will put a label also AKKA. Name: srini Country: India Comment: to rajath follow wat ajinkya does to his sister feet Name: Rajat Country: India Comment: What would be the best way to show respect to my bhabhi's feet? Name: hari Country: India Comment: anu akka before marriage my cousin was taking my blessings after her marriage i should fall at her feet wat to do? pranams to ur feet akka.. Name: srini Country: India Comment: pranams to ur feet anu akka Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Correction to just concluded post. Label should be Ajinkya 11. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 10: Dear little brother Ajinkya, Heartfelt ASHIRVADS and ALL the best for your remaining exams. Good to know that 1st two exams went well. I knew that you would DO IT. Keep doing weel and at the end of all exams, you can update me about your performance. -Anu 17th Apr (8:49 PM) Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: A thousand pranams to your lotus feet Anu Akka, I am working hard and my first 2 exams went well.I am taking my sisters blessing everyday.Every morning I place my head at her feet to take her blessings.Before going for my exam I make her touch my pen with her feet by placing it at her feet and then I kiss her feet and make her place her feet on my head and bless me.This makes her very happy and she blesses me whole heartedly. Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: A thousand pranams to your lotus feet Anu Akka, I am working hard and my first 2 exams went well.I am taking my sisters blessing everyday.Every morning I place my head at her feet to take her blessings.Before going for my exam I make her touch my pen with her feet Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 4: Anu AKKA, My legs are not standing on earth after reading your posy for me. It is an honor for me that you are offering to call me with an affectionate short name. You have not done it on your own to anybody so far in this forum. You only know it best why I have been chosen for this RARE ANUGRAHA. I am left with no words to express my joy. I still can't believe...But WHY you have to ask me AKKA? Also WHY do you use words like SORRY to me AKKA? Waiting for your reply AKKA. -Your Little Sister VARU 15th Apr 2011 (7:30 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: VL 1: Dear Little sister VARALAXMI, Can I call you VARU ? Sorry that I did not take your issue earlier. The reason being it is very very tough. I will only try my best. I appreciate that you labeled your recent post. Please keep doing it so that we can refer posts easily in our discussion. As you pointed right, I have given some time gap to discussion with Ganesh. I have to answer many more like Rashmi, an extra post for Sanjay about "APAURUSHEYA", KAVITA /mohan (aged MIL of KAVITA should not be kept waiting), few of KAVYA's questions (so that BLIND Faith does not spread) etc. on priority basis besides other pending questions. I have to reply to many others also. But I will have continuous interaction with you henceforth. Happy ?? Will continue later. Need to reach Office in time. -Anu 15th Apr 2011 (10:19 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 10: Dear little brother Ajinkya, Heartfelt ASHIRVADS and ALL the best for your exams. As I have already cautioned many, ASHIRVADS alone never work. Work hard and concentrate seriously without wasting time. Maintain cool and take care of your health at the same time. Do not overstrain yourself. As Lord Krishna stated in Bhagavadgeeta, Do your duty sincerely and leave the rest to GOD. I know MY LITTLE brother can do that. DO TAKE your sister's blessings regularly. Add your feelings of AFFECTION along with other feelings while touching her feet. Ask her to ADD similar feelings within her mind while blessing you. All the best to BOTH of you -Anu 15th Apr 2011 (9:25 AM) Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhiji, pranams to your feet. i had not written for a long time and only my wife was writing. we had good fun from "apaurusheya" issue and also your reply to jayanthy about men wearing dhoti. many friends arguing that you always JUSTIFY old traditions were silenced. many are confused about dress code. do you mean no dress code is required at all times? we saw our mother laughing after a very long time - first time since our father's death. she expected the ramayan shloka by the time of ramanavami. but seeing that you will add something which made you "self critical" we are waiting curiously. many more added to fan club after reading your posts to ajinkya and your guidence for "vidyarambham". we follow chndraman in our family. today is souraman ugadi. which is correct in your view? my wife has started pointing mistakes in my english!!! especially my habit of using only small letters even where capital letters are needed. pranams bhabhiji -mohan 14th apr 2011 11:39 pm Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA(VL) 3: Anu AKKA, Please consider answering me as emergency. My sister has a temporary relief due to astrological reasons. But her DIVING to FEET sessions would start once the stars and planets reach favorable positions in about 2 months. I have lot of respect for you for choosing Ganesh's question on priority. It seems you have given some time gap for discussion with him. I feel you can do something with your intelligence and experience. Kavya mentioned you have solved more than 200 problems - In reality it may be much more. You are my LAST HOPE and ONLY HOPE AKKA. -14th Apr 2011 (9:02PM) Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka a 1000 pranams to your lotus feet.I am placing my head under your feet, please bless me, as my exams are nearing. Your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 16e: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. That was the message with some alteration. It is very difficult to do such excercise, but I did it for you. Hence forth I will answer only emergencies. I cannot waste time like this. i.e. KEEP on trying to post with some alterations. I myself became CRITICAL about a part of one very important POST here (POSTED by me). I will explain the same in my next post to KAVITA. ALL the BEST for your Exams. -Anu 11th Apr 2011 (9:42 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 16d: His comment was, "Only the grapes in that painting are LIVELY. If the boy is also LIVELY, the birds should not have come near that painting" !!! The message of this story is "CONQUER the EGO & BECOME SELF CRITICAL" and that would help to BOOST your GROWTH. All the best to ALL of YOU. -ANU 11th Apr 2011 (9:31 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 16c: Next time ZEUXIS painted a ' GRAPES held by a BOY' in real size. As usual birds were trying to eat the fruits in the painting. When everyone else was praising that painting, ZEUXIS himself was not happy. He was now MATURED and SELF CRITICAL. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 16b: Another very good painter by name PARRHASIUS decided to teach him a lesson and painted a boy's picture behind a curtain (Curtain was a part of painting). ZEUXIS was unable to recognize that curtain was a part of painting and not the real one. From that moment he conquered his EGO and became very humble. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 16a: Dear Vani Ashirvads. Attempting to break and POST UGADI message: Once again message is through a story (REAL). I read this when I was in High school. ZEUXIS was a very famous painter in ancient GREECE. His paintings were so realistic that they easily deceived birds. If he painted some fruits, Birds would try to eat the same. That resulted in piling up of LOT of EGO. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear jayanthy, I do not know if your recent question is meant for me. You have not addressed it to anybody. I am also waiting for your reply to my posts addressed to you. -Anu 11th Apr 2011 (8:25 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear thyagarajan, Ashirvads. There is hardly anything in the world that can be used only for GOOD alone or ONLY for BAD alone. Example FIRE can be used for GOOD and BAD. Nuclear Energy can be used for GOOD and bad both. Namskara is just a Powerful tool / act. It is in the hands of people involved in that to use it for GOOD or BAD or NONE of them (Just NEUTRAL). If you have read all my previous posts, you can see that I have suggested people to STOP Namaskara in some cases when the receiving party is undeserving. I have also suggested that it may be stopped if it is not serving any GOOD purpose, but just NEUTRAL (in the case of jayanthy). Coming to your case, I guess you are aged about 16 to 18 years. Please correct me if my guess is wrong. Who are all stay at your home apart from your Bhabhi and you ? Are there any ELDERS who can influence your BHABHI ? I have mentioned that receiving party telling the 1st party anything about Namaskara is considered as INSULT to receiving party as per our family tradition (and it appeals to my common sense, More IMPORTANTLY GURUJI has endorsed that view). I have also mentioned that there may be other correct answers. Your BHABHI's view may be different. But if she thinks coolly, she might change her opinion. As per my classification, SHE is DEMANDING respect not commanding. She is COMMANDING you to do Namskara. COMMANDING respect is something which is done without telling anything by the way of one's behavior, action, sacrifice towards younger ones, showering love and affection, showing TRUE concern etc. which make the younger ones to volunteer himself / herself to do Namaskara with true meaning. A FANTASTIC example for marking a line between Namaskara in GOOD and BAD sense is from our EPIC/ history (more than 10000 years ago), which I would post later (addressed to VANI). Please answer my questions so that we can proceed. -Anu 11th Apr 2011 (7:43 PM) Name: jayanthy Country: India Comment: does your in laws(younger to you)sit with you crack jokes etc? do they tease you at times? or all the time are they very very respectful keeping distance? Name: thyagarajan Country: India Comment: pranams anu akka. as you said the person receiving namaskara cant say it wasnt properly done. im younger to my brother by 6 years and to my bhabhi also by 6 years. i touch her feet eveyday morning soon after pooja and also wash her feet every month. as my brother is abroad i dont get to touch his feet.bhabhi is very strict and insists that everytime i see her i must bow down to touch her feet.last day she was not satisfied with the way i did namaskara and asked me to repeat it and was watching me do it like a teacher. i dont like her commanding respect! i do respect her i see her like my mom equivalent to GOD but she insists on me being too obedient cant talk loud shouldnt sit with her etc. what am i to do? anu akka sees only the good side of namaskara but thats not the case Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Correction to just concluded poat labelled Vani 15: Correct Timing is 11:00 PM. It is typed as 11:00 AM Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 15: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. Concentrate & Prepare well for your exams. I will be disappointed if you don't perform well in your exams. I consider the BEST result you get in your exams as a PRESENT to myself. All the Best. I will again try to post my Ugadi message in parts as per your suggestion - but tomorrow. Now this is for your mother: Dear Chachi, Pranams. Please do not put any pressure on Vani for disclosing about me in your / her circle. I feel very HAPPY if VANI gets any credits in my place. I am mentioning this WHOLEHEARTEDLY. The reason for the same and other extremely interesting analysis will be posted after Vani's exams. -Anu 9th Apr 2011 (11:00 AM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet ANU AKKA. Disappointed that I am not getting to read your UGADI message. Please try again AKKA. Like cutting short into 2 or 3 messages etc. Please AKKA. Your posts to Ajiknya are SUPERB AKKA. Aryabhata story is a LESSON. Exam pressure AKKA. Pranams. -Vani 8th Apr 2011 (7:02 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear jayanthy, continuing, About 2nd issue: Namaskara is not just about RESPECT. Sanjay has pointed out very well that some times is done out of GRATITUDE. Namaskara has LOTS and LOTS more dimensions (I will be clarifying in my future posts with examples). If you are interested, please go thro' them, ask your BILS also to go thro' them and give your value feedback. These conflicts (and the other conflicts about Namaskara raised here and OTHER TRADITIONS) are a result of a clash between Gyana Marga (Jnana Marga) and Karma / Bhakti Marga. Unfortunately Maximum people of our previous generations followed Karma Marga or Bhakti Marga continuously for several generations, which do not involve any questioning. People of Present generation are inclined towards Gyana (Jnana) Marga (FOR GOOD) and they are unable to get satisfactory explanations from previous generation. These THREE Margas are explained by LORD Krishna in Bhagavadgeeta. If you are not interested in all this and simply want to put an END to Namaskara sessions, then YOU are the 2nd Party, your BILS are 1st Party as I have classified earlier. Your MIL is 3rd Party (Not a third party to be IGNORED). Take your MIL into confidence and STOP Namskara sessions. Please Let me know the developments and your opinion. -Anu 7th Apr 2011 (7:38 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear jayanthy, As I see from your post, there are TWO issues. One is about wearing Saree while receiving Namaskara. 2nd is unwillingness about Namskara from your BILS and you. 1st one: None of us in our family or parental family or closer friend circle believe about any DRESS CODE for doing or receiving Namskara. Does your FIL (Father in Law) wear a DHOTI (or any traditional wear of your region) while receiving a Namaskara ? Does your Husband wear a DHOTI similarly while receiving Namaskaras from you and his younger brothers ? Do your BILS wear DHOTI similarly when they DO Namaskara ? Start telling your MIL very gently and nicely that for the Namaskaras to become effective (effect that comes from DRESS CODE), both should be wearing traditionally. Handle the situation tactfully with the help of your Husband and BILS. Most important is to see to it that your MIL's feelings are not hurt. All the BEST. Will continue in the next post about your 2nd issue. -Anu 7th Apr 2011 (7:17 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear rimi, Ashirvads. Very good question. I will be answering your question in detail along with my posts for VANI (Some posts addressed to her hence forth will cover some concepts related to your question). But before that HOW OLD are you ? Married or Unmarried ? If unmarried, are you going to marry shortly ? Are you studying ? Your answers would help me to write the information more relevant for you. (I am assuming that you are a girl). -Anu 7th Apr 2011 (6:53 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear LITTLE Brother srini, Ashirvads. Your Elder cousin brother is also like your own ELDER brother. It all depends on how the relations are maintained. Then his wife is your BHABHI and eligible to receive your Namaskaras at par with your Cousin brother, your Elder brother and BHABHI. All younger cousin brothers and sisters of my husband (WHO are younger to me in relation) touch my feet without any discrimination as I have stated here already. If you consider your cousin's wife as unfit to receive your Namaskaras for a valid reason, it is a different matter. -Anu 7th Apr 2011 (6:38 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 9: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. Good that everything ended happily. Continue getting your sister's blessings regularly. Now both of you know what feelings you should have in your minds while touching feet. All the best -Anu 7th Mar 2011 (6:19 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear RAM1111, Rashmi, Vani, Kavya, Smita, NIMMU, Sanjay (and any others who are willing have my MESSAGE of UGADI - if I have forgotten to mention), My heartfelt Ashirvads and here is the MESSAGE. There were continuous visitors (family friends and relatives) for UGADI & CHANDRA DARSHAN. That is the reason for forgetting "MESSAGE" asked by Vani. No Testing or withholding!! But I have been trying to post my message for the past 40 minutes and it always fails with a Note "SORRY DUE TO THE RULES AND REGULATIONS OF THIS SITE, YOUR MESSAGE HAS NOT BEEN POSTED". Earlier I had such experience and India Parenting team had informed me that they had blocked certain words. I tried replacing many words without any useful results. I am still waiting for their replay for my earlier email. Once the things are clarified, I will post the message. -Anu 7th Apr 2011 (4:18 PM) Name: Rashmi Country: India Comment: Dear Anu ATTIGE, Pranams to your Holy feet. I got the PC only now. Everything went very well at our house too. My daughter never asked any question but TOUCHED only my feet as told to her by my MIL. But the confidence we had because of your answer was immense. That was her FIRST touching FEET to any human being. It is beyond words for me to explain my feelings when I BLESSED her. She has started touching my feet regularly in morning and night after that (again as per my MIL's instructions.) Everybody in our relative circle are so much impressed with you - again beyond my words. They were so happy in particular about your posts to AJINKYA and all all ELDERS consider your views and practices in your family and closer circle as PERFECT. Many of them openly SAID Sorry that they did not have the right feelings within their minds while DOING or RECEIVING Namaskara. Lots more people added to your FANS' CLUB ATTIGE. I thank AJINKYA on behalf of all of us which made my dear ATTIGE enlighten all of us. But sorry that I too did not seek your UGADI message ATTIGE, though I and others have sought your BLESSINGS for UGADI have done it AFTER VANI and all of us have read that post of VANI. Please ATTIGE. All your posts are messages for us but your Ugadi message will be special. You have given such a WONDERFUL message for Vani on her birthday. Hints for IDENTIFYING good schools also pending. Pranmas ATTIGE. Name: sethu Country: India Comment: Dear Ajinkya Happy to know that your problem got solved, Sorry that I have commented like that. I felt ili bad when you have not given value for anu akkas word as she told you to be patient’s still she reply, Now I am happy that you and ur sister is happy on this. Do wash her feet and drink that water to show your whole hearted intimacy as Akka suggested and share that news to all of us in this forum. Do make sure that as akka rightly said it should flow from your heart and she should accept it fully. Name: Nirmala Country: India Comment: Pranams to your holy feet ANU AKKA. Everything went extremely well yesterday. My children were so exited that they started telling everybody "GIRI UNCLE does not know that small babies can have only mother's milk....We stopped him...." They had that sense of having achieved something and that was the right moment for Sanjay to take over...Sanjay called that far relative over the phone and talked to him about "APAURUSHEYA" theory on the lines taught by you. That far relative showed a WHITE FLAG over the phone itself. It was good material for all of us to laugh on UGADI CHANDRA Darshan. But we were disappointed AKKA. We agree (All those who sought your BLESSINGS for UGADI) that we were not smart enough as VANI. She asked for your UGADI MESSAGE in the form of your BLESSINGS (along with normal BLESSINGS) which would be enlightening all of us seeking your BLESSINGS. We at our home thought that you wanted to test all of us and hence withheld MESSAGE for VANI also. If you are BUSY, at least ONE COMMON MESSAGE for all of us AKKA. PRANAMS again. I am so happy that you called me NIMMU. -NIMMU 6th Apr 2011 5:40 PM) Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: Pranams to your lotus feet Anu akka, I am satisfied with the answers, took me some time to understand properly that is the reason for a late reply, infact I talked with my sister and showed her your replies and my answers, i told her that i love and respect her a lot and if kissing her feet is the only way of showing it to her then i will do that and then i fell at her feet and kept kissing her feet until she pulled me up, she told me that Anu akka is right and I neednt kiss her feet not even touch them ,and that my place was always in her heart not at her feet and said she feels very happy to see that I am ready to do anything to make her happy, then she hugged me and we both cried.But I today morning also i placed my head at her feet, she tried to stop me but I begged her not to deprive me of the privilege of touching her feet and to bless me.She agreed and blessed me. Thanks a lot for your replies Anu akka, placing my head under your feet in gratitude, wish i could kiss your feet or do ur pada pooja and thank you properly. Your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear RAM1111, Rashmi, Vani, Kavya and Smita, My heartfelt Ashirvads and all the BEST for ALL of you. Sorry that I could not do it after my post to Sanjay yesterday due to continuous visitors till late night. PS: I am the same person you are guessing KAVYA. I will write to you separately. I am waiting to see if Ajinkya posts anything. Free from Office till Friday. I have to give him priority as promised to him. Otherwise I will try to answer all pending questions. -Anu 6th Apr 2011 (9:12 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 8: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. Continuing, Aryabhata was the first to find that earth is roughly spherical in shape and rotates on its axis in space. He found the value of PI to be approximately equal to 3.1416, which is used for most of the practical purposes even today. Once his writings were out, it naturally created furor among a section of people (It was 5th Century AD). Detractors assembled around his house early morning on a day and started shouting against him. He came out and calmly asked them for their objections. One shouted "YOU have written that earth is in SPACE" Aryabhata asked back "OK if earth is not in space, what is the support for it ? Who is Carrying it ? "ASHTADIGGAJAS" shouted another adding what kind of scholar he is (Not even knowing that simple thing!). Aryabhata again asked "What is the support for ASHTADIGGAJAS ? Where are they Standing ? "On ADISHESHA replied another detractor. Aryabhata continued "What is the support for ADISHESHA ?" Detractors were without an answer. One of them slowly said "Adishesha does not have any support; he is in space" Aryabhata smilingly said "Exactly Gentlemen, I have said the same thing. What I meant by earth is 'THE WHOLE SYSTEM comprising of EARTH, ASHTADIGGAJAS and ADISHESHA' and now you have agreed that the entire system put together is in SPACE." You might need this kind of argument with him. Prepare well within your mind. You know about his line of argument as you have known him for years. Most Important: Such people have expertise of avoiding your questions and take the conversation elsewhere. Be cautious about it and INSIST him not to deviate from the TOPIC. All the best. Anu 5th Apr 2011 (5:38 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 7: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. My MIL is thanking you for letting me have my lunch peacefully. I opened the internet around 3:15 but saw your post and relaxed. All others in the family and guests were reading the posts till now! Your 2nd SOS: Going by your words, usually such people who rally behind money to en-cash people's fear will not have real stuff of knowledge. Just ask him one question: "If Vedas are APAURUSHEYA, was a human VEDAVYASA needed to systematically classify / divide them, sequence the verses in them into proper order etc. ?" If he tries to reply that Vyasa was a BHAGAVAN, quiz him back if the earlier Bhagavans who created VEDAS were inferior and it needed thousands of years for someone like VEDAVYASA to do the kind of work he did. If you need to maintain diplomacy (since he is a relative), I will give you a hint thro' a real incidence from the life of ARYABHATA the ancient INDIAN Mathematician after whom the first INDIAN artificial satellite was named. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear NIMMU, My heartfelt Ashirvads and all the best for your children's VIDYARAMBHAM. -Anu 5th Aor 2011 (3:55 PM) Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. FANTASTIC AKKA. NIMMU Akka's children know that but to refresh their memories; we are sending them to a neighbors house on some other pretext. Another cousin will offer a biscuit to the 3 month baby there to see if our children themselves point his mistake. Once they return home, I will explain them the significance of 'ONLY Mother's eligibility to receive Namaskara' from children below 5 years. Fortunately, that 3 months baby is awake and playing now! Take tour time for 2nd SOS question AKKA. That relative is expected here by 6 PM. Name: Madhav Country: India Comment: Thanks Anu Akka. I am informing Rashmi right now Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 6: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. Sorry that I am late in answering your SOS questions (Today being the deadline). My Co-sister explained me about your other posts (recent ones). Now your 1st SOS question: It is very difficult to convince answer children and one must be very careful. "NO LIES" with them or we would land with other uneasy difficult questions. I can only tell how my son was convinced about the same issue of "TOUCHING only my feet" till he completes 5 years. You can try this one but it has pre requisites. My son is fond of small babies and putting a lot of questions about babies and newborn ones. (Usually all children do the same thing). He started talking when he was about 1 year 2 months and was constructing good sentences by 1 year 6 months. He was breastfed till he was about 2 years. He knew that newborn babies can have only "Mother's MILK" till the age of FIVE months from our previous conversations (We had to explain this when he offered biscuits to babies less than 4 months). We explained him that after mother's milk, the next food introduced to baby id COW'S milk and explained thus made him understand the importance of a COW. We just took the advantage of that and told him that No one else other than mother can give a child Ashirvad till he completes 5 years. Like The babies cannot take any other food other than mother's milk till 5 months (If they did, it would harm them), they cannot take any other's Ashirvad till 5 years and afterwards they NEED Ashirvad of others (Like the Babies needing the Other FOOD). This line of explanation convinced him. You can try the same thing. If NIMMU's Children do not know about babies depending only on mother's milk, you may have to practically tactfully show it. The person showing and explaining about Baby food and the person explaining about touching "ONLY mother's feet" should be different. All the best. From What I learned about your recent posts, I feel that you can tackle your relative advocating "APAURUSHEYA" theory easily. You only require few hints which I will give in my next post about 1 hour from now. -Anu 5th Apr 2011 (2:05 PM) Name: Rashmi Country: India Comment: Dear Nirmala, you are welcome. I have found a good friend in you and we will have lot to share being mothers of similar aged children. Dear Vani, GOD BLESS you and all the best for your exams. So thrilled to hear that word "BHABHI" from a fantastic high ambition girl like you. Name: Rashmi Country: India Comment: Dear Anu ATTIGE, Pranams to your Holy feet. Same situation at my home too. My daughter's Vidyarambham today evening after Rahukala comes to an end. Same SOS question (My daughter has not yet asked but We should be prepared.) Your image in all our view has futher gone up after your advise that we should imgine our mothers feet in mind instead of your feet. That is a feather added to your GREAT CAP ATTIGE. My mother is here to receive Pada pooja from me today. We all understood the gesture that Elders fold their hands while receiving Namskara after reading your posts to Ajinkya. It automatically makes them feel humble. We actually have a practice of touching elder's feet and seeking blessing after Chandra Darshana today. But I am doing it in advance. I may not get time and PC later. Pranams and waiting for your answer ATTIGE. I have asked my cousin to monitor your answer and inform me. Pranams ATTIGE Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet. We are reading all posts and learning. (also enjoying) We have decided not to use short hand anymore after reading your post to SMITA. All of us are doing NAMASKARA to your lotus feet for New year of Chandramana and waiting for your BLESSINGS Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Dear Rakesh, Continuing again as I am GLUED to PC today till getting ANU AKKA's answers. For the TRUE evaluation of a person's depth of knowledge or expertise, a preliminary knowledge of that field is needed. Deeper the knowledge, better is the evaluation. I have regards for your intelligence and that you have an all India ranking of 560. (I got a ranking of 900+ in IIT JEE and I know what kind of effort goes into that). But you are aware that LOT of QUACKS are practicing as DOCTORS and they are popular. That is the COMMON MAN Evaluation without any knowledge in the field of medicine. Urgent Call will continue Name: Nirmala Country: India Comment: Pranams to your holy feet AKKA. My mother is here (as per your practice) and I will offer an EXCLUSIVE Pada pooja to her today. Waiting for your Ashirvad for Ugadi AKKA. -NIMMU Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. NIMMU AKKA is busy with preparations of VIDYARAMBHAM and has asked me to convey her Pranams to you (She has done pranams in her mind). We wait for your Ashirvad for Ugadi. Waiting for your answers to 2 SOS questions AKKA. 3rd one is not SOS for me. BUT my family ELDES consider it SOS!!! Vidyarambham wiil be held in evening and we are waiting for your answers. Pranams AKKA. NIMMU AKKA is coming here. One Sec.. Name: Kavya Country: India Comment: Pranams to your HOLY DEVINE SWEET LOTUS feet Anu AKKA. Smita is also offering pranams to your feet on the ocasion of Ugadi for your blessings. Few more questions AKKA. 5. It is difficult to imagine that you can get angry reading your posts here but Meena aunty was telling today over phone that once you GOT really angry and shouted but that made you look more beautiful. All I know is that the face appears more beautiful when we smile. If I am wrong, forgive me. If you can please share that experience. 5. it is heard that your MIL and you make the best MIL-DIL combo. Some hints in the form of Ashirvad please. (My MIL and me have a very good relation) 6. You have said "......,always he mentions where he could have still adjusted and I mention where I could have adjusted......" and hardly 2 to 3 times differences with your DH (Dear HUSBAND) in more than 5 years. Is it possible to share one experience for us (How can both of say sorry or adjusted on the same issue - One would be correct while the other is wrong). Do not mistake me AKKA. I know you are MUCH ABOVE mistaking me for this. Pranams AKKA. Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet ANU AKKA. Waiting for your Ashirvads and message on Ugadi Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dinner break, Will take TWO of Sanjay's SOS questions tonight itself. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 8: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. Continuing, 3. Whether I would let my brother kiss my feet- It is not a normal practice in our family. Today (being Ugadi), 2 of my husband's teen age cousins did it to me (and not other elders in our family) as a part of touching feet on Ugadi for the first time. All these years they have been only touching my feet with their head. On asking why they did it to me today, the answer was surprising ! They got the IDEA from your posts here and thought that such act would make them feel closer to me and it was like kissing a baby's cheek. I told them that I would feel something wrong on my part if they had not felt closer all these years and this act is needed with me to feel closer and not other elders of the family (Other elders closer without kissing feet) or alternately it would be wrong to choose me to be closer, leaving other elders of the family behind, without a valid reason (At least they should not show such discrimination in public). Finally they agreed to drop it in future (tomorrow itself after Chandra Darshan). 4. As explained earlier, if my brother or any younger person of the family washes the feet on an appropriate occasion, we should not refuse it (It is considered to be their RIGHT) but not feel HONORED (We MUST be HUMBLE to receive the same, might feel happy). On the other hand the person washing the feet should feel HONORED for getting that opportunity. OK Ajinkya, I have finished answering your questions. But as I stated earlier, I am very humble in stating that there can be other CORRECT answers. This is a narration of the right feelings in the minds of 1st and 2nd parties involved to meet the objectives of Namaskara in the TRUE sense as per our knowledge in our families and closer friend circle. At the cost of repetition, there may be other correct answers. Please read carefully and get back to me. -Anu 4th Apr 2011 (9:19 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 7: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. Continuing, Your questions now : 1. My elder sister (if one existed) having such expectation (of me kissing her feet) does not arise considering the family environment, existing values and general thinking of all within our family (and parental family). If at all there was any such expectation (hypothetical), she will become too SMALL in the eyes of EVERYBODY in our family (including me). Hence acting on those lines (kissing her foot ON HER INSISTENCE) is ruled out. 2. I would never expect my younger brother to even TOUCH my feet (As explained earlier, he has to VOLUNTEER and I should NEVER expect). But when he volunteers to touch my feet, I should not refuse it. Starting for a temple visit. Will continue -Anu 4th Apr 2011 (7:47 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 6: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. Continuing, It would be incomplete if I do not mention here that 2nd Party 'OPENLY TELLING 1st Party to touch his / her feet in cases of achieving the ULTIMATE HIGHEST SPIRITUAL ONENESS between the TWO', is regarded with utmost respect. But all of us are nowhere near that (Even Guruji told me that he was FAR FAR AWAY from that). It is to be achieved by TWO people together. A classic reference of such achievement is narrated in BHAGAVADGEETA (Lord Krishna & Arjuna are the pair). From the information provided by you, Your sister and you have not made such a pair (in my opinion). This post is exclusive for this IDEA only. will continue -Anu 4th Apr 2011 (1:16 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 5: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. Now I have holiday for about 4 days. I can freely concentrate answering you and responding to your further queries. I hope that you have already read my post labeled "Ajinkya 4" and thought over whatever I have mentioned there. I left a gap so that you will have time to think over. Now I take all your direct questions. One brief information before those answers: In our family or parental family or any family I have come across, 2nd party (One receiving Namaskara) NEVER tells the first party to touch his / her feet or how it has to be done. For example if my brother forgets to touch my feet on a specific occasion, I should NEVER remind him as per existing practices. Someone else (my sister / mother / father/ MIL / husband / Co sister ... anybody) would remind him. If it appears that he has not done Namaskara properly, then also others should tell him and not ME. It is considered as an INSULT to 2nd Party if 2nd Party tells the 1st party about any of these things. It is considered that the act of Namaskara is a REQUIREMENT or NEED of 1st Party (One who is doing it). 2nd party NEVER needs it. First party is expected to strongly INSIST and COMPLETE the act of Namaskara even if 2nd party tries to stop him / her in between. It is expected that the first party SHOULD feel HONORED by touching the feet of 2nd party and feel that 2nd party has done a FAVOUR by accepting the Namaskara and blessing him / her. First party is expected to be LONGING to do Namaskara and do it VOLUNTEERILY. Will continue in next post -Anu 4th Apr 2011 (10:58 AM) Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Dear Rakesh, Good that you are ONLINE now. I have been in front of the PC and your comment appeared in between my comments. Unfortunately we cannot chat. I will reply only one point now as I am in a hurry and continue tomorrow. Architects and Doctors get paid for their service. Thus it becomes a BUSINESS relation. Question of touching feet does not arise in a business relation. But in spite of that some times DOCTORS' feet are touched. I hope you will witness such incidents during your career in future. Touching doctors' feet as a mark of gratitude (not respect) exists more in Traditional AYURVEDA because it is done free of cost / nominal cost and hence it is not BUSINESS relation. What I mean by Traditional Ayurveda is not to mean CLINICS which are similar to Alopathy practice. It is against our ancient traditional hindu culture to commercialize the Doctor's profession and hence we have that say "Vaidyo Narayano Harihi". What is happening today is different. But still there are lot of hospitals and clinics of Ayurveda which are run on a non commercial basis. What we are getting from ANU AKKA is DEVINE knowledge showing us the LIGHT. That is why we call it ENLIGHTENMENT. You have yourself stated that she is ONE among the BEST in INDIA. Touching the feet of such people is deep rooted in our tradition. Otherwise all people here and the people who attended her PRAVACHANA (mentioned by KAVYA) are not fools to be on their toes to touch her feet. Will continue later. -Sanjay 4th Apr 2011 (12:12 AM) Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Dear Vani, My point is this. Everyone has freedom to decide what he / she should do. Everyone has the freedom to agree or disagree with other's views. I mentioned "....Another category of people are like Rakesh who oppose all good things in our culture...." Rakesh has all rights to oppose me / argue with me. He can prove me wrong if he can by the way of discussion. But he has no business to tell "...but that doesnt mean you all have to show off this respect! i appreciate anu for what she is but that doesnt mean touchng her feet...". He does not know ABC of our culture as admitted by him earlier. Then what is his QUALIFICATION to advise "ALL OF US" about what we should be doing? Who is he to question our freedom to touch ANU AKKA's feet? He is under the impression that he can talk anything about HINDU culture and get away. Can he do the same thing with Other religions? I just thought I should not keep quiet. -Sanjay 3rd Apr 2011 (11:22 PM) Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: well done sanjay your reply to hari was right on the money. dear hari i need no support from anybody. its a healthy discussion going on. can u simplify your questions to me anu so that i can answer them? Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected Vidyavati Aunty, Pranams to your feet. I will try my best to fight. In fact I have already decided so long back and hence hesitating for marriage. I need blessings of all well wishers. I will try my best to maintain cool. I agree I would not have missed those points if I could manage more cool. Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Learn to mind your own business hari. It is a discussion between Rakesh and me. I do not bother you supporting Rakesh but you do not have any business to tell me what I should be and how I should be unless I ask you. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. My husband and myself told about this thread in our home after my MIL noticed the change in both of us. But now everybody is happy. A special request for you DIDIJI. Please write the original Shloka of RAMAYANA which contains Lakshmana's reply to Rama about identifying Sita's ornaments. PRANAMS DIDIJI. Name: hari Country: India Comment: gud answer rakesh you have made it very clear.learn to be independent sanjay. Name: ganesh Country: India Comment: i fully stand by what rakesh has to say.lets not make feet touching the only important thing in the world! Name: Vidyavati Country: India Comment: No deduction of marks for you Vani. (Courtesy ANU -- Her post to Sanjay containing AA NOO BHADRAAHA KRATAVOO YANTU VISHWATAHA, her latest post to Ajinkya about ANEKANTAVADA of Jainism and all her posts to YOU). There can be more than one correct answer. May be several months back I would have awarded ZERO to you. My approach is different now (after reading ANU's posts). Today morning I blessed my son to become like SANJAY and my daughter to become like ANU or at least like VANI when they touched my feet. I myself seek the blessing from my FIL and all those whose feet I touch to bless me to be ANU's GRANDCHILD in my next birth. We require Diplomats with Buddha approach and Warriors like Sanjay to Guard HINDUISM. My point for Sanjay is "He missed certain points in his ROLE". If we had appropriate warriors, HINDUS would not have undergone the torture in GOA, MALABAR, BENGAL (and the list continues....) and mass conversions would not have taken place. So far I have not awarded any marks to you. I will award after reading your "BUDDHA approach remarks". All the best and GOD BLESS you. Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Sorry for interrupting Sanjay and Vidyavati Aunty. According to ANU AKKA HISSING is only second step. First step is to try Buddha approach and see if it works. Vidyavati Aunty might be giving ZERO marks to me for this. Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: its not a matter of who is superior! things you arent sure of ask others alright but for that why flex your spine?does anyone touch the feet of a doctor or architect? Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hello sanjay.first of all i have never tried to equate me with anu bcoz she is in a different league.i expect you all to try and take decisions for yourself and be independent rather than asking anu's help for every small thing.if ur friend is a learned person much more than you does that mean you have to touch his/her feet? i consider anu as my friend im proud to be knowing her but i still discourage people of same age touching feet.im confident about myself i always want to hold my head high and i make decisions for myself and im ready to face consequences. Name: Vidyavati Country: India Comment: Well Done Sanjay, but not VERY well. Your cool deserves an appreciation. My 25 year old son was shouting over the same issue. I showed him your post and told him to learn from you. You have missed two important points. In some of his posts Rakesh has agreed to touch the feet of TEACHERS. In another post to Vani he mentioned "....really we are all like students with one teacher ANU....". Now he advises all of you against touching ANU's feet. I would have given you 100 marks if this point was included in your post. Little extra cool on your part would have got this point for you. Do not take me wrong. Everybody tells me I am very strict and critical in evaluating my students. (Prof. Vidyavati is very stingy....). Keep fighting for the cause of HINDUISM. All the best and GOD Bless you. Name: Prasad Country: India Comment: very well said Sanjay. waiting desperestly and anxiously for your reply Rakesh Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Dear Rakesh, GETTING under the skin of a DOCTOR?? How come? I only said "people of a particular category". Whoever is touching the feet of ANU AKKA are not just showing "respect". It is "devotion" or "BEYOND Devotion". She is not 26 year old girl. She is 27 year old WOMAN (mother of a child). Please read all posts. Nobody has bothered to tell you to TOUCH her feet. Then why are you advising others about what they should do with Anu AKKA/ "Mohan" has asked you once if you followed JESUS by washing your mother's feet. You have not bothered to answer him. Present day POPES are following JESUS and wash the feet of 10 people every year and we read it in news papers. (You can check Internet for exact information). You have not answered questions of ANU AKKA which were a result of your initiation in spite of Sandeep asking you to do so. When we are unable to get solution for any problem we should be humble enough to ADMIT the same and seek it from more enlightened people. Do you advice people to take their OWN independent decision and buy medicine instead of consulting a DOCTOR? If your answer is YES then you have moral ground to ask us to take independent decisions instead of CONSULTING Anu AKKA. If your answer is NO, then you consider your profession superior and the rest (at least the area of ANU AKKA's expertise) as inferior and no consultation required. And you consider ANU AKKA as ONE AMONG the BEST in INDIA. Alternate possibility is you are considering our points seeking ANU AKKA's advice as SILLY and they are like SIMPLY taking a DOLO for head ache without consulting a DOCTOR. You have claimed yourself at par with ANU AKKA by writing "...... only few of us have the divine power to show the LIGHT to others and you must make the most of this opportunity......" I request you to ANSWER my SOS questions before AKKA does it and enlighten us. Thanking you in advance. -Sanjay 2nd APR 2011 (6:46 PM) Name: ganesh Country: India Comment: by elder i mean people of previous generation. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Correction to post labelled ganesh 5. It is typed as "....closer friend circle have been sincerely adopting to the best of our ...." please read as "....closer friend circle have been sincerely ADAPTing to the best of our ...." -Anu 2nd Apr 2011 (2:03 PM) Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: dear sanjay why shuld u try to get under my skin?to me anu is a 26 yr old girl who is defenitely more enlightened than for age but that doesnt mean you all have to show off this respect! i appreciate anu for what she is but that doesnt mean touchng her feet.rather than showing respect try to be independent in taking decisions and as anu said discharge your duties with commitment rather than trying to touch and wash the feet. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Ajinkya 4: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. OK As per your desire, I will answer all your questions directly and at the end of that, if your problem continues to exist, we will discuss and explore other possibilities. Please go thro' with patience and introspect. In certain matters (Most of the matters in practical life), there are MANY or MULTIPLE correct answers. This concept is very beautifully explained as "ANEKANTAVADA" in JAINISM. So I cannot say that my answer is the ONLY correct answer. For example if the question is "What is the sum of 2 and 3 ?" , there is only one answer. Instead if the question is "Which fruit do you like ?", 10 different people may give 10 different answers and all of them are correct. One variety of answer may be "I do not like any of the fruits" also. Other variety of answer could be "WATER MELON on a HOT SUMMER day, APPLE before going to bed, BANANA when I am hungry". There can be more complex answers also. - What I mean is it may not be JUST One word answer. But all of them are correct in their own view and liking. Your matter involves such question and that is the reason I put questions to narrow down the range of possibilities in the answer/s. Questions put to others are also intended for similar purpose many times. -Anu 2nd Apr 2011 (1:10 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: ganesh 5: Dear ganesh, Why sorry ?? Please relax. I am a normal human being. I wanted to suggest you one thing- Whenever you do something for benifiting or satisfying somebody from your close family circle whom you really love and care, THINK that you are doing it as a part of your DUTY or RESPONSIBILITY and not SACRIFICING something. On the Other hand when you GET even a small thing from somebody, THINK that they have SACRIFICED for you. If all people adapt this simple thing, there will be great improvement in mutual relations and bonding. You be the first to start and you will grow in their eyes. This GOLDEN idea is from GURUJI and all of us in our family and closer friend circle have been sincerely adopting to the best of our abilities. But what is the reason behind "not yet getting back home" ? Waht is the required age difference between two persons, NEEDED for TOUCHING FEET in your opinion. Example 5 years - 10 years. Anything which is PROPER in your view. I had put the same question to Dr. Rakesh (You can go thro' the postings) and there is no answer yet. -Anu 2nd Apr 2011 (12:39 PM) Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. 3 Urgent SOS questions AKKA. 1. NIMMU AKKA's children's VIDYARAMBHAM will be held on coming UGADI or next day (CHANDRA Darshan day) Auspicious time slots for both days fixed. Children are very exited. When they were told that, they have to touch the feet of NIMMU AKKA only (They have not touched anyone's feet so far but watched others in the family touching feet of all elders) they are asking WHY NOT Others? We are depending on you totally for some answer which can satisfy small children. 2. One guy from that old BLIND FAITH school of thoughts is arguing that nothing about VEDAS should be questioned in Veda classes or elsewhere because they are APAURUSHEYA meaning not created by humans. These people behave as though they are SOLE LEGAL HEIRS of VEDAS. (Another category of people are like Rakesh who oppose all good things in our culture). We have the apprehension that he might create some unconfortable scenario during PLANNED VIDYARAMBHAM (he is our far relative and dissatisfied about our VIDYARAMBHAM arrangements since he was not consulted) Even if he is consulted, he would give nonsense solutions which none of us are satisfied or convinced (He has been giving all such BLINDFAITH promoting solutions to people to keep them in fear and make money). I have confidence that you can BLESS your disciple (me) to tackle him somehow.. Please AKKA. 3. All people at home and relatives forcing me for marriage. I just wanted to postpone by 2 to 3 years (My grandmother's health is deteriorating) Finally I have told everybody that I would go according to your advice. Pranams AKKA -Sanjay 1st Apr 2011 (11:58 PM) Name: ganesh Country: India Comment: sorry anu mam what i meant was bowing to meera who is my colleague is impossible.everybody has elevated you to the status of a goddess.i stay in my quarters at mangalore. im a kannadiga as well. touching the feet of similar aged people whoever it may be is impossible Name: Kavya Country: India Comment: Pranmas again AKKA. I accidentally clicked SUBMIT. I heard so much about you without mentioning anything about this article or your postings here from MEENA AUNTY family and SAROJA Aunty's family members and also others. Do know true or false. I have some questions for you. But before that if you are not the person I am imagining please forgive me. 1. They say your face and figure have not changed or hardly changed (little more seriousness in your face) since 2005 or you look more beautiful now even after a child birth. Is it true? Almost all girls in that SATSANG meeting ENVIED your beauty and GLOW on your face without using any MAKEUP before your Pravachana and after Pravachana it turned into DEVOTION. Is the Secret behind maintaining the BEAUTY your DEVINE KNOWLEDGE? How come that BEAUTY which can make MISS WORLDs shy away without any MAKEUP? 2. Your MIL told it seems that there is heavenly relaxation when you press her legs and fet which she never experienced with anyone else. Both MEENA Aunty and Saroja Aunty tested and found it to be true within 3 to 4 minutes and immediately withdrew considering themself unworthy. Is it TRUE? If so How is it possible? 3. Is it true that your MIL and FIL asked you to solve a very long pending difference of opinion between them about FASTING within few days of your marriage and you did it successfully? Is it possible to share that experience? 4. I hear so many (more than 200) problems solved by you like what you have been doing here. Do not know to what extent they are true. But will you permit me to POST them here? Waiting for your reply AKKA. PRANAMS again Name: Kavya Country: India Comment: Pranams to your HOLY DEVINE SWEET LOTUS feet Anu AKKA. You have not so far confirmed if you are the same person of that SATSANG PRAVACHANA. You have told Vani you will be posting a reply for me. I have been waiting eagerly AKKA. No urgency as you have to answer so many. My MIL and FIL appreciated your idea of picking the question of GANESH. I had to console them with great difficulty after reading your answers to GANESH. I had to promise them so many times that such thing will never happen in our house. AKKA just confirm once and Later GIVE your detailed ASHIRVADS. On 24th and 25th March you had been to visit temples in Nanjanagud etc. with SAROJA Aunty as told to me SHOBHA (Saroja Aunty's daughter. AKKA, I also came to know that in their relatives house they organised a SUMANGALI POOJA and along with the relatives daughter and DIL SHOBHA also did the POOJA. She is so LUCKY. When will I get that chance AKKA. SHOBHA says she feels a different energetic experience whenever her hand comes in contact of your feet or your hand touches her head or face... So LUCKY she is and their relatives daughter and DIL said the same thing. So many more things she told me. Please confirm that it is you AKKA. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear ganesh, Whether you have gone back to your home or not is not clear from your post. I understand that you are UPSET. (Your parents would be MORE UPSET). Making decisions in such disturbed state of mind may not yield good results. We can continue this discussion slowly. But it is your DUTY to consider your parents' well being as your PRIORITY and act accordingly. Changes can happen later slowly over a period of time. I did not understand what you meant by "bow down in front of colleagues". How does "bowing down or touching feet" arise in your office ? I don't think you will be doing it to your seniors also (including the HEAD of your office) in your office. I FULLY agree with you that RESPECT should not be DEMANDED, which I have already stated in my reply to "mohan". One question to you (I have to write lot more but no time now)- If your BHABHI was not known to you at all prior to your brother's marriage and not a colleague of yours, then do you have any problem touching her feet as per your family practices ? -Anu 1st Apr 2011 (11:02 AM) Name: jayanthy Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhi is it a must that one must be wearing a saree while receiving namaskaara.im fed up let me tell you im the wife of avinash who happens to be the eldest of 3 siblings.his younger brotherswho are elder to me keep touching my feet.neither i nor they r interested but mil insists hence no way.i totally agre to ganesh.my mil insists that i have to wear saree everytime i receive namaskaaras which im uncomfortable with.they are forced to respect me much more than what is needed Name: rimi Country: India Comment: Annu akka. Pranam. I have one question for you. Wife is a half part of our family and husband is another part.Both are in equal status. None is submissive and none is aggressive. So why a wife will go to touch feets of her husband? and if a wife touches her husband's feet in respect, husband also should touch his wire's feet. Name: ganesh Country: India Comment: thanks anu mam! i have been out of home for 2weeks now.whatever said and done i cant see meera as mother and touch her feet.we work for same firm and there i call her name where im better placed than her i see her daily and she too talks to me. im ready to sacrifice for my parents and family but i cant bow down in front of my colleague.respect is not to be demanded Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: Anu Akka,please forgive me if I have said anything wrong,placing my head under your feet and begging for mercy...your younger brother Ajinkya Name: AJinkya Country: India Comment: And if anu akka says I should stop posting I will.I came to us 5 years back,my da has started a branch of his company here,my sis moved here to look after it and I moved here with her.but I go to India almost every monthmonth. Name: AjinkyaA Country: India Comment: Hi sethu, thanks a lot for teaching me manners,and thanks a lot for trying to help me out. I am sorry if i posted anything wrong. I am not sure what nuisance have I created for u, still sorry. I am not sure Wat did u mean by me expecting sympathy from you ,wen all my posts were addressed only to anu akka. And as far I know I have not posted anything that has violated the site policy. Name: Sethu Country: India Comment: Dear Ajinkya Where are you from?? US or India?? Why so desperate? Why so impatient? Here everyone is trying to help you and you are taking advantage of it. I really Don’t know what you expect from your mother like sister when she expect only some respect which she deserves. If you don’t like to touch her feet which so precious to you, forget it. Anu akka is a goddess and she is here for everyone. Request you to don’t post anything still Anu akka has kind heart and she will reply to you if you deserve it. You have to keep minimum that much decency while addressing a public forum. Others are not here to offer you sympathy. Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: Just let me know if you would have done this if your elder sister(who is like a mother to you and has taken care of you like a mother wud do) had such an expectation from you? Would you want your younger brother to kiss your feet? Would you let him kiss your feet? Would you feel good if your younger brother washes your feet and drinks that water like Arun did? Would that make you feel honoured? Please Anu akka give direct answers to my questions, I am begging you. your younger brother Ajinkya. Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: Pranams to ur lotus feet Anu Akka,I read all your posts, I am sorry if I am being impatient but I am not as matured as you, my morning dialemma is making me very frustrated, just let me know wat you feel akka, u need not explain why or why not, just let me know if I should kiss my sister's feet or not. Name: srini Country: India Comment: Anu akka pranams to ur feet. i dont have problem of touching feet of my sister-in-law. but wat about cousins wife? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Rashmi and Nirmala, Heartfelt Ashirvads to both of you. I clearly understand your feelings about me. With all that, your decision to IMAGINE my feet while blessing your children during VIDYARAMBHAM is not correct. You have that EXCLUSIVE status of blessing your children BELOW 5 years because you are MOTHERS. Therefore it would be appropriate to imagine your MOTHERS' feet while blessing your children below 5 years. After discussions at our home, I did the PADA POOJA of my mother (Only my mother and none else as per my MIL's conclusion) and took her Ashirvads just before BLESSING my son when we conducted his VIDYARAMBHAM. I have been imagining my mother's feet in mind while blessing my son and continue to do so till he completes 5 years as rightly concluded by my MIL. All the best. -Anu 29th Mar 2011 (9:24 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Correction to my just concluded posts (continuation posts addressed to ganesh): The date should be 29th Mar 2011 (It is wrongly entered as 28th Mar 2011 may be because I was feeling sleepy) -Anu 29th Mar (9:05 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Continuing further, After going thro' my posts here, you can very well guess that in my existing opinion, I consider that you have to touch your Bhabhi's feet (Even if there is no one to force you for that). But I do not impose it on you or anybody unless they understand the reason behind it. If Meera is undeserving to receive your Namskaras, I am against such act but nothing to that effect is mentioned by you. (Being closer to you all these years is not a valid reason). Even if she is undeserving, you have to initially touch her feet and take your parents into confidence before stopping Namaskaras to her feet with appropriate reasoning (Please read my posts addressed to "mohan") All instances mentioned by you about your closeness to your Bhabhi prior to her marriage, are valid reasons for you to touch her feet with more meaningful involvement. -Not for refusing to touch her feet. You will have hundreds of friends many of them close and few closer and so on. After marriage, Meera is ELEVATED to a different status, which is far above her previous status. Now the relation is closer (equal to mother) and sacred. She too has new duties and responsibilities towards you (and other members of your family). This sacred BONDING has to be maintained and improved. Significance of Namskara is not just showing respect. It is just one among LOT many. I will be explaining the same in my future posts addressed to Vani. I strongly suggest you to get back to your home, seek your parents' forgiveness and touch your Bhabhi's feet with complete involvement (Imagine touching your mother's feet while touching your Bhabhi's feet to achieve proper involvement) and observe if you cherish that feeling. Continue touching her feet whenever you have to touch your brother's feet and as per practices at your home. If she is undeserving, please LET me know. YOU ARE WELLCOME TO discuss with me and change my opinion if you FIND ME WRONG. -Anu 28th Mar 2011 (3:13 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Continuing, Read about Gandhiji and you will know that he was extremely impressed with two plays in his childhood. One was SATYA HARISHCHANDRA and the other was SHRAVANA KUMARA. Story of Shravana Kumara is from RAMAYANA. His parents express the desire of going on a pilgrimage. Unable to afford for a Bullock or Horse Cart, he ties two baskets (big enough to contain a human being) to the two ends of a long THICK BAMBOO POLE. Seating them in those baskets, he carries the pole on his shoulders to fulfill their desire. In the midst of that pilgrimage Shravana Kumara was mistakenly killed by the King Dasharatha (Rama's father) trying his skill of SHABDAVEDHI... Thus Dasharatha got the CURSE from Shravana Kumara's parents that he would die in the GRIEF of his son... Your parents did not want any SACRIFICE from you. They only told you to touch your Bhabhi's feet (for your GOOD according to them). -NOTHING for their selfish desire. Their intention of course is also upholding our tradition and PROTECTING your Bhabhi's status, which is their duty. Is it appropriate on your part to make such dutiful parents suffer in pain of son leaving home (You will understand that pain when a grown up son leaves home at your old age) ?? -Anu 28th Mar 2011 (2:36 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear ganesh, When exactly you started living with your friend is not clear from your post. -I mean between 23rd and 27th March (as per positioning of your post) or much before and the posting is done between 23rd and 27th March. Whenever it is, if the STALEMATE is still being continued, it is very unfortunate. I have come across thousands of arguments opposing the idea of TOUCHING FEET of UNDERSERVING or UNKNOWN or UNCONNECTED or UNCONCERNED people. Lot of examples can be seen in this forum itself. Opposition for touching feet of really closer people is very rare - I mean the reason for OPPOSITION being CLOSER. I have come across lots of people who felt HAPPY that they did not have to TOUCH the feet of undeserving or unknown people on occasions like marriage or festival and so on. This is for the first time (I have come across) that the difference of opinion led to coming out of house. Just think in a relaxed mood. You must be above 22 years and matured enough. Remember the sacrifices your parents must have done for you. You cannot realize all of them until you yourself become a father with grown up children. But at least whatever you can at the moment are good enough. ALL Thoughts of TWO individuals can never be SAME. Life is all about GIVE and TAKE. Even if your parents are WRONG (for argument sake) in asking you to touch the feet of someone, Heaven will not fall on earth if you do so - At least it should not stretch to coming out of home. My subsequent posts will explain about why BHABHI's feet are to be touched -Anu 29th Mar 2011 (1:49 AM) Name: Ajinkya Country: India Comment: Pranams to your lotus feet Anu Akka,thanks for finding time to help me out, don't know how to thank you enough, would have done your pada pooja if i could, to show my gratitude.Waiting for your replies, humbly placing my head at your feet...your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Ananya Country: India Comment: Thanks Anu, that reply was enlightening for me too...today i didnt feel awkward at all wen my BIL touched my feet and I felt happy to place my hand on his forehead and bless him. Name: Akshay Country: India Comment: Thanks Anu didi, after reading your reply to Sanjay i have decided to started touching my bhabhi's feet, infact i went and touched her feet today morning,i prostrated myself at her feet and asked forgiveness for not respecting her till now..thanks Anu di...pranams to your lotus feet Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 5: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. One of your pending questions is "should a younger TWIN touch the feet of elder TWIN?" The answer is YES. None of Our traditions, shrutis, smritis, vedas, upanishads or Historical EPICS etc. has fixed a MINIMUM AGE DIFFERENCE between individuals for the act of NAMASKARA. On the contrary, we have lot of illustrations for younger sibling (or TWIN) touching the feet of ELDER ONE even when the age difference is very less (few minutes may be). Rama was elder to other sons of Dasharatha by few minutes. Lakshmana and Shatrughna were twins... Each one was touching the feet of all ELDER brothers (ELDER ONLY by few minutes). Draupadi was touching the feet of DRISHTADYUMNA who was ELDER to her by a few minutes. Sahadeva was touching the feet of Nakula... Many have calculated the age difference of RAMA and SEETA as 6 years 243 days. There is a CLEAR mention in RAMAYANA that Lakshmana was touching Seeta's feet everyday because she was ELDER to him in RELATION. When Rama asked Lakshmana to identify Seeta's Ornaments and Jewellry she had thrown while Ravana was abducting her, Lakshmana replied that he could identify only her ANKLETS and not other ornaments. The reason given by Lakshmana that he identified only Anklets as he saw them while touching Seeta's feet everyday has a message about how a Bhabhi is to be treated. Such Leading Examples have been the BASIS of OUR culture and Traditions. Feeling very sleepy. Will pick Ganesh's question within a few hours. -Anu 28th Mar 2011 (2:00 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Akshay, Ananya & Ganesh, ALL 3 of you have questions related to touching Bhabhi's feet, although your problems are different. I will address each one separately, but I feel answering a pending question of Sanjay would help before addressing yours. Please go thro' my post addressed to Sanjay after this post carefully. -Anu 28th Mar 2011 (1:16 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. I am back after a tour. Thanks for the confidence you have in me. You have mentioned that you are ready do anything I suggest you. But I believe that you should understand and participate in arriving at what has to be done and what would be appropriate rather than simply telling you to "DO certain thing". If I do so, (simply telling) it would not be effective and would not be of any use to you. Hence I suggest you to continue what you have been doing FOR the TIME BEING. I will answer all urgent pending questions within TWO to THREE days and PROMISE you that I will have at least ONE POST for YOU everyday and finish your question soon. It would help me to concentrate ONLY on YOU and explore better IDEAS for you. Just a few days- After all you have been doing for some years now. -Anu 28th Mar 2011 (1:03 AM) Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Ganesh Pls read the Anu akaa's topic on Elder in relation. She is clearly told about that there. Your Bhabhi is equal to your mother. Really Bhabhi Ma ssamn he. It’s your fortune that you got a chance to touch her feet for blessings. Do touch them, respect them when ever possible. She is your age only. There are people touch/respect the feet of Bhabhies even they are younger to them. You are so fortunate to touch Meera bhabhi's divine feet. do touch her feet and confirm us soon. Name: Sethu Country: India Comment: Vani Akkka I am boy of you age only i.e.; 19 yrs. still I am young in relation to your knowledge. Anu akka I my goddess and I do Shashtanga paranam at her divine feet every day. Also I do shashtanga pranam at ur feet too. It’s because of the knowledge you earn from My goddess Anu Akka. I am sure your feet will be washed by someone soon. Do share to me the same pls. Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Dear Sethu, I imagined ANU AKKA's HOLY feet in my mind while writing "GOD BLESS YOU" in my previous post. THANKS a lot along with sincere pranams to the feet of RASHMI Bhabhi for this ides. -Anu 27th Mar 2011 (7:29 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Dear Sethu, Do not feel sorry for anything. What I meant was, all people in this forum know the truth. Anybody in place would have followed ANU AKKAs instructions (ANU AKKA has the capability of making things simpler so that anybody can follow as stated by RASHMI) I do not know your age, nor do I know if you are a boy or a girl. When ANU AKKA is here, you (and everybody) can simply take her BLESSINGS and offer pada pooja to her instead of ordinary person like me. For your satisfaction, I will share my experience if I receive a pada pooja. GOD BLESS YOU. (I am not eligible to say more than this) -Vani 27th Mar 2011 (7:21 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet Anu AKKA. I could only postpone DINNER invitations. That itself is a great relief for me. My mother continues now- Anu, I am not understanding my own daughter. She is not telling me any reason about why she is not ready to reveal about you. She has taken promise from me and my SIL that we will not tell anybody as mentioned by her earlier. But I feel that she is getting lots of credit and recognition undeservedly. Actually you have to get all that. Although she mentions here in this forum that she is placing all credits at your feet, people in our circle are under a wrong impression that she has planned and executed the whole thing in a fantastic manner. Why should she get the credit for something which actually you deserve? Now somebody in this forum has also started crediting her. How is this correct? Vani is not opening her mouth at all about why she does not want to tell people about you. For the first time in my life I have a bad feeling about my daughter that she is cheating somebody that too YOU. Now she says she is ready to tell about you if you INSIST after so much of pressure from me and my SIL. Please DIRECT her to reveal about you to everybody. God Bless you. Vani continues. AKKA it is me VANI again. AKKA believe me I do not have any intention of taking away the credits from you. I am very honest about placing all credits at your feet. I can tell the reason only to you (not even my mother) as to why I do not want to reveal about you here. But there is no way for that. Can I have your email id? Pranams AKKA. Name: Nirmala Country: India Comment: Pranams to your HOLY feet AKKA. We all have many more questions but one of them is meaning of "PADA VANDANA" and "PADA GRAHANA". You have mentioned these in your post to CommonSense. Similar word appears in RAMAYANA. We know only Abhivadana, Sashtanga and Panchanga classification of Namaskaras. Please explain more on "Padavandana and Padagrahana". Can both males and females do them? THANKS a LOT to Rashmi for the fantastic Idea of imagining AKKA's HOLY feet in mind while blessing children. I will adopt the same. Pranams and waiting for your reply AKKA -NIMMU 27th Mar 2011 (2:38 PM) Name: Rashmi Country: India Comment: Dear Anu ATTIGE, Pranams to your Holy feet. Who else apart from you can understand the feelings of parents while finding a school for admitting their first child? Our confusion was so much that we finally decided to simply admit our daughter to the school you studied!!! But you have made us understand the great truth in such a simple way- Wonderful That is your greatness. You make any complicated things so simple and educate us. Your explanation about VIDYARAMBHAM is a landmark to be followed for ever in coming centuries-An update needed for our glorious tradition at right time. We will conduct VIDYARAMBHAM to our daughter soon before her admission to school. I have decided to imagine your HOLY feet in my mind while blessing my daughter. ATTIGE, please treat our reques as urgent and give us your views about points to be considered for school selection. You know how difficult it is to get good schools in Bangalore. Thanks for clarifying that ATTIGE is a relation with equally deep bonding (my husband used to tease me for fun earlier that he is closer to you than me- I showed your post and took sweet revenge!!) Waiting for your valuable POINTS about school ATTIGE, PRANAMS Name: Ajinkya Country: U.S.A. Comment: I am ready to kiss her feet,wash her feet and drink that water...if Anu akka says so,i will do whatever u feel is correct Anu akka...pranams to ur lotus feet...placing my head at ur feet...your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Nikita madam Requeat you give more details about you, like how old are you, how many brothers you have and there ages, in that how many touch your feet, when all they wash your feet. etc also pls let us know any one elder to you ever touched /washed your feet Name: Nirmala Country: India Comment: Dear Anu AKKA, Pranams to your HOLY feet. I am Sanjay's cousin sister. Please accept pranams of me and my husband and show us the light. All of us in our relative circle are your fans. Sanjay is proud that he has found you for us. He is very shy today (He will write later) And I had to anyway take your blessings for your reply about Vidyarambham and otherwise also. The clarity and the reasoning you come up with are exceptional. We had consultaed so many but none had a proper explanation. I am so happy as a mother AKKA and equally happy is my husband and all others at home. We will conduct VIDYARAMBHAM of our children soon in auspicious date and time. AKKA We feel that you wanted to test Sanjay how serious and attentive he is and that is why you have asked which questions are pending. All of us are very serious AKKA. We have found (all of us have put efforts) that three more answers pending from you. 1. How do we make children touch the feet all of a sudden after 5 years. 2. your personal experience with VEDIC QUOTE "AA NOO BHDRAAHA..." 3. Along with answering people's questions here, you also make some general comments. We feel that Some such comments for Sanjay's posts are also pending. New questions AKKA- 1. How did you guess that Sanjay's mother toungue is KAnnada or he knows Kannada though he has never mentioned before. 2. You have said AJINKYA is not yet ready... Why?? Your blessings are needed for my children AKKA. Can I request you to call me NIMMU as all elders at home and parents home call me? Pranams once again AKKA -NIMMU 25th Mar 2011 (10:00 PM) Name: Sethu Country: India Comment: Dear Vani Akka I am really sorry akka It was not a joke and was not comparing you with Anu Akka at all. I have meant all with true heart only. You are right what ever respect you are getting will flow to Anu akkas divine feet. And she should proud to be having you as a disciple. But the way the used knowledge you gan from Anu akka was really appreciated. For that I will wash your feet if you permit. The way you use the knowledge I am sure that very soon someone from your circle will give you a padapuja. Its not a simple thing that you are getting this much respect in such a small age. Pls share if you get a padapuja soon. Touching your divine feet in respect. Name: ganesh Country: India Comment: i was asked by my mom to touch meeras feet and take blessings which i refused at the very moment. everyone got angry but i stood by my ground. meera too was very supportive. my parents shouted at me and i became a bad boy. i went off to my friends house and my parents didnt bother to call me. i called them but they said without coming home and touching bhabhis feet i wouldnt be allowed to enter the household. i know meera for as long as i can remember and we are too gud frnds. we have gone out together studied in company and have even quarelled umpteen no of times she is my gud frnd and shall be.what should i do? Name: ganesh Country: India Comment: namaste anu mam. i have a very important problem to discuss with you please help me. i had a friend meera we were classmates from kintergarden right upto tenth after tenth we syudied together for predegree and then on 4 years BTECH, she is my best friend our family friend and everyone at home liked her.my brother liked her and with the blessings of all elders married her and brought her to my household. i was also very happy about it.now started the problem Name: Nikita Country: U.S.A. Comment: Hi Ajinkya,sorry to intrude, but I dont find anything weird or embarassing in kissng your sister's feet.Even my brother kisses my feet.Elder sister is like your mother...nothing wrong in kissing her feet. Infact you should thank her for letting you kiss her feet. you should make her place her feet on your head and bless you every morning. you should wash her feet and drink that water every morning....this will bring success in your life. Name: Ajinky Country: U.S.A. Comment: Hi Anu Akka pranams to ur lotus feet,answering your questions, I and my sis have been here since the last 5 years,yes she touches the feet of all elders.She respects all elders.Akka please give me an answer on whether to kiss her feet or not, coz every morning i face this dialemma of whether to kiss her feet or not...it happened even today morning...sometimes i feel like just giving up my pride and kissing her feet and just letting me down at her feet...but i always stop myself...the feeling that this might be hurting her is killing me from inside...i am so confused Anu akka Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS, You have not said any WRONG THING. Don't worry. You are considering me as your elder sister and hence you are like my OWN brother. Advising you to have patience is my duty to get you BEST results. The WHOLE day going VERY GOOD for you could be either coincidence or effect of WHOLEhearted ASHIRVAD of your sister. But Ashirvads alone never work. READ all posts carefully (questions to me and my answers) and you will understand to some extent. I will share one or more of my experiences later, which would be useful in understanding this. Kavita's posts and my answers more important on this aspect. Since how many years are you staying in USA ? (Your sister and YOU). You have missed one of my questions. i.e. Does your sister touch the feet of your parents and other ELDERS with complete involvement ? I will not be able to check internet for approximately next 2 days. WILL continue later. -Anu 23rd Mar 2011 (5:26 PM) Name: Ajinky Country: U.S.A. Comment: Anu Akka, I wanted to share one more thing yesterday morning,I find it damn weird to share though,while touching her feet,she was sitting and she accidently placed one of her feet on my head ,but when she saw this, instead of taking her feet of she placed it there and I kissed her feet and she gave me ashirvad keeping her foot on my head. And I find it weird sharing it but the day went damn good for me..Could this just be a coincidence or is it because she gave aashirwad whole heartedly coz she felt more homoured when I kissed her feet and let my head under her feet? Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Pranams to your lotus feet Anu Akka,I am 19 and I am ready to do that if this is a good way of showing my respect for her on rakshbandhan, but Anu Akka before getting into washing her feet shouldnt we be discussing about the questions on kissing her feet? Because washing her feet is upto me and I can decide to do so or not do so based on your advise, but she expects me to kiss her feet every morning when I take her ashirwad,so it would be really helpful if you can spread some light on this...I am sorry if I have said anything wrong,begging you to forgive me, placing my head at ur lotus feet , your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. How old are you ? (may be 16 to 18 years) Please answer this- important. Don't be in a hurry. Having patience is very essential for real long term and effective solutions to problems. In my opinion, you are not yet READY in TRUE sense to do what Arun has suggested. I will explain later. Are you willing to that whole heartedly ? i.e. washing your sister's feet and drinking that water on Rakshabandhan day. Your wish is more important than anybody's opinion including my opinion. -Anu 23rd Mar 2011 (12:18 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 4: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. VIDYARAMBHAM was /is held at the age of 5 years because earlier the real learning used to start around that time. In the changed circumstances it can be held much earlier to restore its significance and real meaning, instead of conducting at the age of 5 years and make it appear meaningless. It may be held the moment parents decide to teach anything to child either at home or temple as per the practices in their family (before admitting the child to school - formal or informal). You have raised valid points about the possible conflicts about Namaskara & Blessings if VIDYARAMBHAM is held earlier to 5 years. It is indeed essential for the child to take BLESSINGS on that very IMPORTANT DAY of their life. Our GREAT TRADITIONS have a clear answer, which I will ELABORATE now. FOR any person, OWN mother (the one who has given birth) is always ELIGIBLE to receive Namaskara regardless of age and status. If a person gets into SANYASASHRAMA, he / she becomes ELDER in RELATION to all people of GRIHASTASHRAMA EXCEPT OWN MOTHER. i.e. ALL people of GRIHASTASHRAMA should touch his / her feet (including father, grandfather etc.) But mother is exception. Any Sanyasi has to touch his / her mother's feet EVEN after entering SANYASASHRAMA. So the child below 5 years for whom VIDYARAMBHAM is held should touch his / her mother's feet and take BLESSINGS and it is the mother who should make the child write auspicious letters etc. There is a famous poem in KANNADA you must be aware of.. "Maneye modala pathashale, Janani tane modala guruvu, Jananiyinda Patha kalita janaru dhanyaru..." meaning Home is the first school, MOTHER is the FIRST teacher, BLESSED are those who learnt from mother... Will continue in next post -Anu 23rd Mar 2011 (12:04 AM) Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA. Thanks for your answers AKKA. Intention of some of my questions was to know if I have conveyed my problems to you. If same practices are there in your family, you can understand me better. Answers to your New questions AKKA: 1 & 2. I can get privacy with my grandfather & his grandfather and talk to them freely in PRIVATE. (but not in front of everybody) I can talk to each one of them separately or together. They are very loving as I mentioned earlier. But in front of everybody, STRICT protocols are to be maintained. I fact after grandchildren attain certain age and understanding, they them self take us out on some or other pretext and find out our problems if they suspect any and if found reasonable, they solve them with strict instruction to us to maintain secret. 3. You are simply GREAT AKKA. you have understood me right though I did not express it properly. My problem is the fear that marriage may not take place. 4. I will write in separate post. 5. You are correct AKKA. We cannot stop anything anticipating a BAD thing like DIVORCE. All of us should go ahead with positive frame of mind hoping for the BEST. But I feel we should prevent bad things happening if we suspect in advance. (marriage is a question of life in our culture and we cannot come out of it even if it is suffocating in RICH families putting FAMILY HONOR on TOP of everything) 6. My would be was sent to USA for STATUS of having US degree with strict instruction that he should not indulge in part time jobs there as most of Indian students do. Enough money would be pumped from here... and he abide by that during his student days. I think I have not conveyed the income aspect properly. 50 laks per month is not family income. It is approximate share of each income tax assescee of our family and his family TOO. LIKE my grandfather, father, mother, uncle, aunt, me my younger sister all are getting about 50 lakhs per month as shareholders of family business. My younger brother will get it once he crosses 18 years. Same situation in his family. 7. I will have to think a LOT AKKA. I will post it along with answer to questin No, 4. 8. (Your unnumbered question) You are perfectly CORRECT AKKA. Using TRICKS and postponing his travel would be just TREATING the SYMPTOM and not the DECEASE. AKKA I will maintain my cool. It my previous birth's good deeds that I have got someone like you. How can you guess my ACTUAL problem without me stating it properly? I will just follow you AKKA. Please help me. PRANAMS -Rani 22nd MAr 2011 (5:07 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Dear Sethu, Why comparing me with ANU AKKA? or calling me super guruji? Every one here in this forum knows I do not TRULY deserve the Namaskaras I have been receiving. What is recognized in me is actually the DIVINE talent and skill of ANU AKKA. I was only INSTRUMENTAL. I become very humble when my feet are touched and as already stated, I place all that at ANU AKKA's feet. I can share my experiences but of what use to anybody apart from TIME PASS? You are also well aware that it is ANU AKKA whose feet are to be washed. But if you are joking by offering to wash my feet, VERY GOOD JOKE HAHAHA. -Vani 22nd Mar 2011 (2:20 PM) Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Hi Anu Akka, pranams to ur lotus feet,I read Arun's old post, where he mentioned about washing his sister's feet and drinking that water.Should i do this also on Rakshabandhan to please my sister? I am still not sure if i should kiss her feet very morning? Can you please answer my question Anu Akka, because now every morning i am in a dialemma on whether kiss her feet or just touch her and get her aashirvad. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. Totally 5 questions of yours ae pending 1. About my knowledge of Vedas 2. You answering on behalf of Dr. Rakesh- further explanation... 3. about making CHILDREN sacrifice for younger ones & responsibilities... 4. AKSHARABHYASA... 5. TWINS... Let me know if there are any more and I have missed. Keeping the 1st 3 pending, I will pick up the last two now. What you have refered as "AKSHARABHYASA" is also called as "AKSHARABHYASA AARAMBHA" or more often as "VIDYARAMBHA" or "VIDYARAMBHAM". It is a beautiful ritual in our culture and one of the foundation stones in giving GOOD "SAMSKARA" to our children. I heard from a friend from KERALA that many Christians there take their children to churches and make them write "SRI YESUVE NAMAHA" in place of "SRI GANAPATIYE NAMAHA" (done by us) as a part of "VIDYARAMBHAM". When others are taking GOOD from HINDUISM, DROPPING it from our culture would be meaningless. Your OBSERVATION about the said ritual loosing its MEANING and SIGNIFICANCE and EFFORTS to RESTORE its meaning deserves great appreciation. If this kind of positive updates were done to our rituals, with changing times, situations and circumstances at right junctures, there would have been nothing to point as BLIND FAITH in HINDUISM. Details in next post. -Anu 22nd Mar 2011 (7:51 AM) Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Pranams to your lotus feet Anu Akka, i read Arun's reply..do u also have similar views, please let me know... Name: Sethu Country: India Comment: Dear Vani Akka In such a small age your feet's touched and respected. You also become a super guruji now. I am sure your feet are also washed by someone soon. Do Pls share the same. Or I may do it with pleasure. Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Ajinky I just want to share my knowledge/ Thought with you. 1, Kissing feet is a form of respect in many communities. So your elder sister, equal to your mother, wish you to kiss her feet doesn’t have any problem at all. From her knowledge she may think that it’s the highest form of respect which she deserves from you. I believe the biggest form of respect is to wash the feet and drink that water with all devotion. Suggest you to do the same which may make her so happy and your all problems will be solved. I don’t have a real sister. And I get such care from one of my cousin. I do the same to her and the happiness both we had was really good. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Rani 3: Dear Rani, Ashirvads. More questions for you: 1. Can you get Privacy with your Grandfather and his Grandfather ? 2. How is your proximity with his Grandfather? (I mean can you talk freely in private) 3. I feel from your answers that your real problem is not related to doing your would be's pada pooja before marriage but your apprehension that subsequently marriage may not take place (at least the problem has MOST to do with fear that marriage may not take place and LEAST with pada pooja). Think coolly and let me know. 4. What are the reasons for such fear ? 5. Many marriages end in DIVORCE. Does it mean bride and groom should never touch the feet of other side relatives and elders till THEY are TOTALLY sure that marriage doesn't end up like that ? 6. What is the exact reason for your would be's study in USA with the family business yielding income of that magnitude ? (His share in 50 lakhs per month lesser for him or any other reason) 7. If there is no force, what would be your choice about marrying him ? PS: I can suggest many tricks to make your would be land after 30th July 2011 (It is just postponing his journey by about a week) and solve your problem But I feel that it would be just TREATING the SYMPTOM and not the DECEASE. Please let me know if I am wrong or if you are happy with those TRICKS. -Anu 21st Mar 2011 (8:56 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I will adopt your suggestion to avoid / postpone dinner invitations. As far as I am concerned YOU are my GURUJI. It is true that I gain a LOT from all your posts. But somewhere I feel I should continuously interact and spend time with you AKKA. As I mentioned earlier (in my post in between your posts labeled "Vani 7" and "Vani 8"), your son and all people who regularly interact with you are lucky. Kavya is really lucky touching your feet in REAL rather than VIRTUAL like others here. Your question to Smita is is quite tough. Apart from realizing the ROLE of MOTHER and correcting our behavior towards our mothers (and all mother related duties) can there be a DIFFERENT LESSON? But your question to Smita itself clearly indicates that ALL of us have something more to LEARN from those posts of hers and yours. I will try my best to answer that TOO. Any deadline for that AKKA? Please clarify if I am wrong. PRANAMS AKKA - Vani 21st Mar 2011 (3:37 PM) Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Also Anu Akka, please let me know what would u do if your elder sister asks u to do this? Would you want your younger brother to kiss your feet? Wont u feel awkward making your younger brother kiss your feet? once again pranams to your lotus feet. Hoping to see ur reply soon, your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Pranams to your lotus feet Anu Akka Answers t your questions: 1.) My exams start in May 2.) I am doimg my graduation in Boston 3.) Yes we touch the feet of all elders(i don't see my parents everyday but i touch their feet when i see them). 4.) Well my sister thinks, when I kiss her feet, she feels that I respect her and she belives that my lips touching her feet will stop my mouth from saying anything that hurts others or something that could land me in danger. 5.) she does not kiss anybody's feet and she has never asked anyine to kiss her feet other than me. 6.) I would lick her feet for her happiness, coz other than this she has been the most loving sister ever, but its just that i feel a bit awkward kissing her feet in front of others.Besides she keeps her feet very clean too...but its just the fact that me being a guy kissing a girls feet... Infact its not just rakshbandhan she wants me to kiss her feet everyday instead of just touching them.Most days while making sure my nose and forehead touches her feet while touching her feet,even my lips touch her feet,she keeps asking "why can't u kiss my feet properly and take my ashirwad?" .But its only on Rakshbandhan that she really insists that i kiss her feet. Placing my head at ur feet, ur little brother ajinkya Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Rani, Ashirvads. You deserve lot of appreciation for your answers in detail and clarity as that would help a LOT in understanding the issue and resolving the same. I noticed that at the end of your latest post, you lost your cool. Maintaining COOL is very important while tackling sensitive issues like this. Cheer up. Your problem will be SOLVED. Before talking up the main issue, I will answer your questions and put some more to you. your 1st question : Who is elder in relation -Your mother or Father's younger sister ? If your father's younger sister's marriage was held before your mother's marriage, then your father's younger sister is considered ELDER. Otherwise your mother is considered ELDER. In our family, I am considered ELDER to my SIL because my marriage was held earlier. You can now check with other families also (Some families may be following differently). Thus what is practiced in your family and our family is SAME. Your 2nd question : Would I have done pada pooja of my husband before marriage if I was in your situation ? To be honest, I have not yet understood your situation and imagining myself in that situation, GIVING an answer and asking you to FOLLOW what I would have done is not a SOLUTION to your problem. Answer to your 3rd Question : Practice of BRIDE doing pada pooja of GROOM during marriage exists in our family and I HAVE DONE IT -Anu 21st Mar 2011 (12:20 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear SWEET Smita, Ashirvads. Time management and not following someone (even mother) blindly take more posts and would require personal fine tunings and interactive posts. I will pick those topics later. About using short hand as what RAM1111 & you are using (many others are using to a lesser extent)- This is a result of sending LOT of SMS on mobile due to restrictions on the message length. Now you have lot of alternatives to send SMS (thro' Internet). We cannot use it (at least at the moment) for any official correspondence or serious writings due to lack of standardization. If you just practice using regular English, it would not take much time and you don't have to switch from one format to other. You can choose whatever is convenient but that should reach all people. How many GREAT LESSONS did you have ? Can you elaborate ? -Anu 20th Mar 2011 (9:06 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 14: Dear Vani Ashirvads. Your guess is correct. Privacy is the main reason for not revealing much about me. You will understand it better after reading my post for KAVYA. Speak to the people who invite for DINNER VERY VERY politely about your fast approaching exams and request them to have it after your exams. They would oblige. SKILL of making people realize the TRUTH from their own comments has been a BLESSING of GURUJI. I do not have even 10 percent of his SKILL. In future posts I will try to pass on to you whatever I know but it is quite difficult. It needs direct interaction and not a channel like this. REMIND me without any HESITATION about your questions PENDING or ANYBODY's questions pending. Otherwise there are very good chances that I miss some questions in this scenario. NO SPECIAL REASON for selecting Dr. Rakesh's comment to answer Smita. It was just the shortest route. Otherwise there would have been more question answer postings from both sides. NEVER feel that you are LOOSING me. You can consider the comments addressed to others also as yours because they are useful to you. If there is any emergency question from you, I will pick it on priority. Study and Prepare well for your exams. -Anu 19th Mar 2011 (9:36 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. Continuing, the incidence goes like this. I read it when I was in Primary school and forgotten the name of the celebrity (may be a president of US). When he was young, he went in search of part time job. A gentleman talks to him and readied to appoint him as his helper in his office. Employer asked him if he knew TYPEWRITING. He answered YES but sought 4 days time to report for the job. Employer was very much pleased with him after a few days and asked him WHY he took 4 days to join in spite of severe poverty and money requirement. The answer was stunning!! He did not really know "TYPING" but learnt it during night time with the help of a friend who was working and sleeping in a different office practicing almost 10 hours a day!! His apprehension was that had he answered "NO" about his "TYPEWRITING" skill, he would not be hired. Your effort reminded me about that. Remember not to OVERSTRAIN yourself also. You cannot put 40 non stop hours instead of 40 hours spread over 10 days. You have to identify the point where you get exhausted and need a brake and rest. After your English PRACTICE, you can continue with anything which is of interest to both of you. LEARNING starts from WOMB and ends in TOMB. Now your questions about SUMANGALI POOJA- You get some information from my other posts. As I have mentioned earlier, practices vary from region to region and family to family. You can talk to your neighbors and collect more information. Post your questions to me after that. During SUMANGALI POOJA of certain occasions, all people of the house fast till the SUMANGALI POOJA is over and the SUMANGALIS who received POOJA are fed. Examples are Grihapravesham and Sumangali Pooja done during Dasara festival. In some occasions SUMANGALI POOJA is arranged as a part of ritual of other festival and only person doing POOJA fasts till completion of POOJA and meals of SUMANGALIS. Examples are SUMANGALI POOJA performed by newly wedded bride during her first year of married life. -Anu 19th Mar 2011 (8:59 PM) Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. Just Opened the Internet to see your answer. Feeling so nice. Your ASHIRVAD is really POWERFUL DIDI. It is like OCEAN. It is our capacity to take whatever is possible for us. If anyone spends only 1 or 2 hours or never acts after ASHIRVADS from you, it is their MISTAKE. PRANMAS DIDIJI Dear Smita, Even if GOD has choosen you to put that question to DIDIJI, you deserve a minimum thanks because GOD's grace is slightly more on you than the rest of us May be due to your good deeds of previous birth. It is even more clear because you have the fortune of placing your head on the feet of your cousin who had DIRECT Ashirvad from DIDI. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. It is very good that you have developed confidence about ENGLISH. ASHIRVADS ALONE never work. You are a graduate which means you know ENGLISH. You were never used to talk using only English. So you needed practice of that. Your determined effort plays a major role in your success. Ashirvads can boost your confidence and morale and ACT like CATALYST. Your post must be on or after 16th March (You have not mentioned the date and time but Rani has mentioned). If you have read and adapted the method suggested by me from 12th March to 16th March and spending almost entire day for English Practice, you have put in 40 to 50 hours of effort for the same. I can only SHOW the direction. Rest is in your hand. If you were to put only 2 hours a day for English Practice with THE SAME ASHIRVADS, you would have taken 20 to 30 days for similar improvement in your English. That doesn't mean LESSER powerful Ashirvad. It is all in your hand. What I am trying to tell you is NEVER make a mistake relaying only on SOMEBODY's ASHIRVADS but put your sincere effort (Karmanyevaadhikaraste Maa Phaleshu Kadaachanaa...). I will continue with an interesting real life incidence about this in next post -Anu 19th Mar 2011 (4:36 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear little brother Ajinkya, ASHIRVADS. I will try my best to answer everybody. Rakshabandhan is still on 13th August. (Some celebrate it on 12th August) Much before that we will have detailed discussion. I will pick questions depending on several factors. If there is anything urgent, please let me know. 1. What are you studying ? 2. When are your Exams held ? 3. Do you (both your sister and yourself) touch your parents' and other elders' feet regularly at your home ? 4. Have you tried to find the reason behind your sister's expectation ? 5. Does she (your sister) also kiss anybody's feet (like your mother) ? 6. Do not bother about THIRD PARTIES (Please read my earlier posts about THIRD PARTIES). If there is no compulsion, and your sister simply tells you that she feels HAPPIER if you KISS her feet on Rakshabandhan day and leaves the CHOICE to you, what would you opt ? I will wait for your answers. -Anu 19th Mar 2011 (4:11 PM) Name: Kavya Country: India Comment: Dear ANU AKKA, PRANAMS to your HOLY, DEVINE, LOTUS, SWEET feet. I am one among those lucky who held your feet for few seconds after your GLORIOUS, POWERFUL, ENLIGHTENING PRAVACHANA in SATSANG meeting hosted by MEENA AUNTY on 10th September 2005. The parts of my face touching your feet so lucky and so are my eyes which saw your feet. I still feel and cherish that experience and the flow of positive energy from you into me. But AKKA, Meena Aunty being a close friend of your MIL has not so far helped in getting you for SUMANGALI POOJA on all days of DASARA festival from 2005 to 2010, either in my mother's home or my home (after marriage). We (my mother, my MIL, myself) have been requesting her so many times to give your address or contact number. She never gave the number. Says that she would herself get your MIL and you for SUMANGALI POOJA if you are not pre occupied. Same is the tale of all people whom I know from that SATSANG meeting. Her children tell me so many times that they got many of thier problems solved and GOT your blessings on ALL auspicious days but never reveal your contact number. Whenever they conduct SUMANGALI POOJA at their home or their very close relatives, they get you but never tell us at least that so that I can come there to take your ASHIRVADS. Both your MIL and yourself have not appeared in any monthly SATSANG meeting of the said group after September 2005. I do not know what to do. PLEASE AKKA do something. When Smita told me that she has found a GREAT person on INTERNET, I read your postings and I have no doubt that it is you. With lots of Hopes Pranams to your feet AKKA Name: Smita Country: India Comment: Dear KAVITA, Y thanking me? Rakesh, ur husband, so many others, yourself and MYSELF are only INSTRUMENTAL. It's imposible 2 even tel anything about ANU AKKA after knowing mor about ANU AKKA frm my cousin sister KAVYA. ALL credits placed at the feet of ANU AKKA Name: Smita Country: India Comment: Dear Anu AKKA PRANAMS 2 ur SWEET feet. I hav no wrds 2 xpres 4 many days. U r so simple and GREAT AKKA, u even admit u wud b doing sam 4 yrs bak. GREAT Leson 4 me. AKKA I was thriled to know my cousin KAVYA has actualy touched ur feet mor than 5 yrs bak. I just put my head on her feet - She is so lucky. I want 2 mor things AKKA. Y R U not using short hand writing? It saves time. U hav adviced not 2 folow mother blindly. mor on that please. Now KAVYA is taking frm me. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. I forgot to mention one thing yesterday DIDIJI. I am not typing the comment directly but wrote it first, corrected and then typed. But then also, I am totally confident about English now. I can apply for a job here, attend the interview in English and anything shortly. After your Ashirvad on 12th March posting, I am spending almost entire day following your instructions. Writing in HIndi English mixture, converting to total English and sit with PATIDEV for discussion and correction. So much POWERFUL your ASHIRVAD DIDIJI. When all is SUMANGALI pooja done in South? Who all are supposed to do that. I have seen a kind of fasting on those days in my neighbours. Please tell me DIDI. PRANAMS DIDIJI Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDIJI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. DIDIJI Your ANALYSIS is possible only for great soul like you. NO amount of THANKS sufficient for teaching us a lesson about importance of mother (and reminding all women about thier responsibily as mothers) taking Rakesh's comments only for namesake. Heartfelt THANKS to Smita for her question without which we would have remained IGNORANT. How is my ENGLIH now DIDIJI? There was not much progress in English learning till you told me how to do it on 12th March post. It is your Ashirvad responsible for all this. One more GOOD thing is I touch my PATIDEV's feet at the start and end of English CLASS taking him as GURU. This has made us closer than ever. Please tell me what to do when English learning gets over. I am taking all your posts, messages and WORDS as ASHIRVAD. PRANAMS DIDIJI. Name: Ananya Country: India Comment: Hi Anu, my BIL is elder to me but younger to my husband. He touches my feet every morning and doesnot get up until i place my hand on his head and bless him. I feel so awkward,but my mum MIL insists on doing this.Not sure how to make him stop doing this... :( Name: Akshay Country: India Comment: Pranam anu didi....recently my elder brother got married to my classmate...she is of my same age...my mom says i should touch her feet everyday and take her blessings like i do for my brother...is this needed? even my friend feels that i should touch her feet and should call her bhabhi... Name: Sandeep Country: India Comment: Dear Rakesh, Please answer ANU AKKA's old questions to you. Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA. Now question No 7. AKKA now a days many engagements are broken. Especially with boy or girl coming from USA. What if I do his pada pooja (even without washing feet also) and then for some or other reason marriage does not take place? Falling to his feet all these years is OK, I can console myself saying after all he is my cousin elder to me by 2 years. I cannot even imagine doing pada pooja of any male other than my husband. Pada pooja of females OK during Sumangali Pooja. Would you have done it if you were in my situation? I have grown watching my grandmother, mother, Aunts and so many relatives doing it and do not have any problem doing pada pooja of husband during and after marriage (I don't know if doing it during marriage exists in your family. I have seen in many marriages and not seen in many marriages). Why such PAINFUL practices for girls before marriage in our culture AKKA? Is it not painful as the experience narrated by VARALAXMI? In RICH families like ours, it is SUCH a situation that even taking breath against well maintained FAMILY HONOR is IMPOSSIBLE. I cannot even comfortably post my questions here. Don't know if I will use my friend's PC next time. PRANAMS AKKA -Rani 16th Mar 2011 (1:19 AM) Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA, i just hope u will reply to my post someday... Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA. I will continue now. More about your question No. 1. In my would be's home also the power center is his grandfather. Both my grandfather and his grandfather are very close and meet almost daily during morning walk. As I mentioned situation is not different there. Protocols very well maintained there also. But There are no double standards (I feel I should state this after reading your post for Sangeetha) All lead by examples. My grandmother and his grandmother in their 70s keep complete fast (NIRJALA UPAVASA) on Bheemana Amavasye. Hence there is no scope for any daughters or daughters-in-law or grandchildren to say anything but to follow them. There is real love towards all younger ones but it is not shown in open. They never discriminate between daughter and daughter-in-law. I will be the eldest DIL of our generation and already younger ones have been respecting me. My would be's brother, sister and cousins have been addressing me in plural for more than 8 years. (This is additional info as well). Now question No. 8. The Aunt is my mother's Co-sister. One more question out of curiosity AKKA. My would be MIL is my father's younger sister and younger to my mother. My mother falls to her feet on all occasions. But in some families it is reverse (In your family also). Can you explain? PRANAMS AKKA Name: Sangeetha Country: India Comment: Anu, Thanks for the reply. I've been busy but will try to read your posts as soon as I can. Take your time. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sangeetha 3: Dear Sangeetha, DOUBLE Sorry for the delay again. I do not know if you have already read my comments addressed to you. You should be quite busy taking care of TWO Children. So many questions pending for me but I thought I should complete yours first. As you must be aware, Bheemana Amavasya is also called "GANDANA POOJE". It is definitely customary to wash the feet. We do NAMASKARA on a regular basis. So it makes sense doing something special on that EXCLUSIVE day meant for our husbands. In fact many do the POOJA on additional days also. I do it on my birthday and WEDDING ANNIVERSARY. (Nothing to do with tradition but for my own satisfaction) Many do not even do the POOJA. Many do POOJA without washing feet. Many do it for first 9 years of marriage and then stop it. Many do not even fast properly (eating fruits, taking milk, eating condiments, eating AVALAKKI & Curds and so on). I am not blaming anybody. You might have read KAVITA's comments. Being a North Indian, she has observed variations in practice of Bheemana Amavasya. Over a period of time and gradual phasing out of Joint and Nuclear families, these rituals and practices get modified. Whatever your mother did is whatever she has seen from her mother or mother-in-law or anybody in closer circle. I can also list the possible reasons for the change in celebrations. Once the celebrations change at some juncture, it continues down the generation. Some change occurring 2 to 3 generation back might be the reason for skipping "Washing feet". I feel I should continue in next post (Longer posts many times fail with error message) -Anu 15th Mar 2011 (9:07 PM) Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Anu Akka, please let me know what should I do. Should I do what my sister wishes for? pleas help me out...once again pranams at your lotus feet, placing my head under your feet, your younger brother Ajinkya Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA,continuing my mail. My sister has always been very good to me, she has taken care of me like a mother. She is just 3 years elder to me but has been like my mom. Actually she takes care of most my needs because my mom is doctor and always keeps busy with her work.I respect her a lot. Every morning I take her blessing placing my head at her feet. I can't bear her getting angry with me, last time when she got angry with me I almost washed her feet with my tears. I really respect my sis, I am fine kissing her feet in private but kissing her feet on rakshabandhan in front of all my cousins freaks me out a bit. Name: Ajinky Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA,placing my head at your feet for you blessings... I have a question regarding my elder sister, for rakshbandhan she after tieing the rakhi to my hand she would insist that I kiss her feet to show respect and that my nose should touch her toes wen I touch her feet. I am ok with placing my head at her feet but feel kind of weird kissing them. my sister has been very nice to me and has always been helpful to me and has always taken care of all my needs, i have been reluctantly doing this till now so as not to disappoint her...please advice on this Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: im sorry anu if you didnt like my comment!the improvisation on my sentence was excellent!is it better to be a jack of all trades or cement yourselves in one in which you are defenitely one among the best in india!if you can spread your knowledge in a bigger way,take from me anu there will be millions to seek respite from you! only few of us have the divine power to show the LIGHT to others and you must make the most of this opportunity!allthe best sis! Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. I am putting up a few questions so that I may not forget later. Although I am a Bachelor and marriage is not fixed, I am putting the questions. 1. How do we make children SACRIFICE for their younger siblings (Please share experiences or give examples) like a 7 year child sacrifice for a 5 year younger one. Is it not very difficult? 2. Same way what kind of responsibilities be given to them? (These questions after readind your post labelled "Sangeetha 2") In your very early post (1st BIG ONE) you have mentioned that children below 5 years are normally not allowed to touch the feet. Same is followed in our family also. The reason they explain is "GOD's Presence in the innocent minds of children below 5 years". But once a child completes 5 years, how do we introduce TOUCHING feet all of a sudden? During old days a ritual called "AKSHARABHYASA" was held when child completes 5 years by making him/her write OOM, SHREE etc. signifying the learning process just started. I too underwent same. But now (me also) children know lot of reading and writing much before that. Can "AKSHRABHYASA" ritual be held before they complete 5 years? If so are they not supposed to take blessings from elders or are they supposed to take the BLESSINGS withou touching anybody's feet. How can anybody bless them without their feet being touched? Does it not amount to CURSING? Alternatively should we drop the ritual of "AKSHARABHYASA" ? AKKA these are my humble questions placed at your feet. My cousin sister is trying to find answers for these for her 2 year old TWINS (boy and girl). Also should a younger TWIN touch the feet of elder TWIN? When I asked my parents, they were unable to reply but finally suggested me to take your advice and pass on to my cousin. I know AKKA you can give an answer which will be acceptable to all. Pranams again AKKA. -Sanjay 14th Mar 2011 (4:53 PM) Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA. Thanks for your quick response. Answers to your questions are 1. My grandfather (my father and uncle (father's younger brother) never dare to speak anything against him. As far as Pooja rituals are concerned, it is my grandmother. Similarly both my mother and Aunt (closer to me) i.e. her co sister never dare to even think of doing something against her wish. It will be my mother after her as the eldest DIL of the house. Even my Aunt cannot move freely with my mother and she is expected to obey my mother exactly the same way she obeys my grandmother as on date. Protocals are very well maintained. Same situation in my would be's house. 2. Their family equally RICH. 3. A sort of INDUSTRIALIST families (Hotel, Tourist, Travels, LODGING) having more than 50 lakhs monthly income. 4. My would be is landing by 25th JULY and he does not have GURUBALA at that time. Also marriage cannot be held in ASHADA. Nothing is clear to me now about when he is going back. 5. I am not sure, but before he left for USA, I thought I was really loving him as ELDERS of families had decided that we would marry when we were small children. 6. From the day I understood that he would be my husband, I did NAMASKARA to his feet with full involvement. (may be since I was 8 years or so) Somebody is coming AKKA. I will continue later Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I guess that the reason for not revealing your date of birth is PRIVACY. I have been experiencing this since several days. I did not find time to check your posts also. AKKA my exams are nearing. How do I escape from the DINNER invitations? Please help me. My mother has already slept. She wanted to tell something. AKKA your improvement to Rakesh's comment was a WONDERFUL lesson. We were not able to think in spite of hints and especially in view of Smita's question. I feel that this is a unique SKILL to make people realize the TRUTH from their own comments. Help me to achieve this AKKA. Was there any special reason for selecting Rakesh's comment (I know that you can extract the same TRUTH from many other comments)? Just a reminder AKKA - My questions are still pending at large. The discussion deviated to a different scenario (for GOOD). Just to remind you AKKA because you have to answer so many people. You know better when to BLESS this little sister with what. I am also eagerly waiting to read your answer to Smita about time management. Am I loosing you AKKA? At one time there were continuous comments for me. Now there are totally 27 comments after your previous comments addressed to me. PRANAMS AKKA Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Rani, Ashirvads. I need more details about you and your family before I can suggest anything. 1. Who is the Power Center in your home and the boy's (your WOULD BE) home ? 2. Is his family as RICH as yours ? 3. Are you (both of you) from INDUSTRIALIST families ? 4. Bheemana Amavasye is still far -July 30th. What situation is making your marriage beyond that ? (There can be so many reasons but I would like to know it from you rather than guessing) 5. Do you really LOVE him ? 6. Whenever you did Namaskara to his feet, did you do it fearing family elders or with involvement ? 7. What is your real apprehension towards his Pada pooja before marriage ? (As your Aunt noted such practices do exist in some families) 8. How is that Aunt you mentioned related to you ? 9. Any other information which might be of use for getting a solution to your problem -Anu 13th Mar 2011 (8:10 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sangeetha 2: Dear Sangeetha, Sorry for the delay again. I checked the site today and thought I should finish smaller comments before taking up yours. Congratulations for keeping up GOOD practices in your family. It is not just touching feet, but all other aspects in our lives that we need to show our children by LEADING. Innocent minds of children never accept double standards. More examples are watching TV, maintaining books and other articles, keeping the house clean, SACRIFICING for younger ones, disciplined life style, avoiding wastage of food or any other item and so on. The list would be endless. We would be on a better footing morally to advice our children ONLY if we LEAD by example. All of us in our family circle and parental family strictly observe all these and many more. So it is never a problem to make children develop good habits. My younger sister was touching my parents' feet and my feet daily and hence without anybody telling, my brother started touching the feet of all of us (Parents, me and my sister). We SHOULD also make the ELDER children realize their responsibilities (not just receiving NAMASKARA) towards the younger ones and fully utilize the act of touching feet for improving the BOND between them besides all GOOD qualities. The PURPOSE of NAMASKARA is then fully achieved, rather than practicing it just as a RITUAL. Anyway, many women who regularly touched their husbands' feet stop it after the childbirth and it is VERY GOOD to know that you have regularised it after childbirth. About Bheemana Amavasya Pooja in next posting (within today or tomorrow) -Anu 12th Mar 2011 (11:49 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Rashmi, Ashirvads. My schooling was in a remote taluk headquarter more than 200 kms from Bangalore. (Government School Kannada Medium upto 10th Standard). My brother is studying in the same school now (Kannada medium). Please do not think that admitting a child to a good school will take care of everything. All the people with outstanding achievements are not from the same school. All children who studied in a particular school never end up achieving same heights in life. So, find a good school in your locality for admitting your daughter. If you want I can give my views about points to be considered for school selection. ATTIGE is NOT a relation meaning lesser BONDING compared to AKKA. BONDING is in our hearts. My SIL, BIL, Co SISTER, ALL cousins, All cousins of husband (I am either AKKA or ATTIGE - i.e BHABHI to most of them) are equally close to me as my own SIBLINGS. NOT only that- All of my MIL'S friends' children / DILS are equally close. YOU ARE ALSO EQUALLY CLOSE (as all people metioned above). Happy ?? -Your DEAR ATTIGE Anu 12th Mar 2011 (8:48 PM) Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka pranams to ur holy feet.i assure u that i will do good in exams with ur ashirvads and your wishes..pranams Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear SWEET Smita, Ashirvads. The answer I was expecting for improving Dr. Rakesh's comment was "im so impressed with your knowledge and it is so hard to believe that you are only 26 years old and on top of that you are a MOTHER AND professional!" I have added 2 words "MOTHER AND" I am not blaming anybody. All of us LOVE our mothers a lot but ignore / neglect / forget to realize what she does (INCLUDEDING ME). My time being spent as a professional is recognised but my role of a RESPONSIBLE MOTHER is not. This is because all of us never recognize that of our own mother. I do not know how many tried to improve the comments seriously, but atleast many tried and none was able to. ADDED to that a hint was given in the form of mohan's comment. (I would have ended the same way if it was 4 years back). THIS ATTITUDE in you is mainly responsible for you not getting convinced when your mother tells you but convinced when I mention the same. I am not suggesting you to blindly take anything that comes from your mother but give a serious thought to it. I will post hints for managing time later -Anu 12th Mar 2011 (9:16 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Ashirvads. The basis for guess was from your husband's earlier post and your post. He has mentioned that he started calling your DIDIJI as BHABHI MA. Such words come only from heart when the other person is truly deserving. You have mentioned that your DIDIJI has maximum respect for her PATIDEV. Guessing about reaction from a person like your DIDIJI thus became very simple. Added to that, you are very good at heart (You think so much not to hurt your MIL's & DIDIJI's feelings). She sure would have noticed your goodness in the past 5 months and cannot react differently. Happy with my ANALYSIS ?? How is your English PRACTICE going on ? I suggest you to write down whatever you would talk (mixing HINDI and ENGLISH) in various situations of routine life, and then give a thought (sitting with your husband) about converting them to total English. That is all you need and that would utilize your husband's time to the best extent. All the best. -Anu 12th MAR 2011 (12:53 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Sanjay 2: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. Thanks for your offer. My husband's friend (old classmate & Civil Engineer) is looking after most of the things. As you know better, we need to inspect, make choices, co-ordinate various agencies and so on which take good amount of time. Your word is more than enough and GURUDAKSHINA is too big a word. I am just making a humble attempt in a healthy discussion. -Anu 12th Mar 2011 (12:34 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear LITTLE Brother srini, Ashirvads. Thanks for your wishes. You have not said anything about the resent I asked -I will remind you again from my old post. "Now I ask you for a present. This AKKA wants the BEST performance possible from you in your exams and colourful results." -Anu 12th Mar 2011 (12:22 AM) Name: Rani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your LOTUS FEET Anu AKKA. When my friend told me that I can get solution for any problem from you, I did not believe. After reading the entire views posted here, I have confidence. You are my only HOPE AKKA. I am reading all views since almost 3 hours and for the first time in my life I felt I forgot the world while reading. I am 22 years old, from a RICH family but highly TRADITIONAL. We have been brought up in such a way that all of us (me and my younger siblings) are DOWN to EARTH. My marriage is fixed with a boy who is currently in USA. He is my father's sister's son well known to me since my childhood days. I have fallen to his feet several times (may be 100 times or more) on all festivals. We celebrate BHEEMANA AMAVASYE regularly. I have been fasting for 7 years now. This time I will have to do his PADA POOJA before marriage itself as per one of my Aunts. I have no problems after marriage but before marriage, I can't. I have no guts to talk to any elders at home except that Aunt. We are never allowed to question anything. My Aunt is trying to pecify me telling that since it is before marriage, it will be PADA POOJA without washing feet. But even that I CANNOT. You are my ONLY HOPE AKKA. PRANAMS AKKA. Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka i wish all the best for ur house...pranams.. yours little brother Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. Sorry AKKA. I forgot to ask you if you need any help in House Construction though you have mentioned it much before. It is the final stage which makes it more time consuming. Please tell me whatever is required and take it as part of GURUDAKSHINA. Pranams Name: Rashmi Country: India Comment: Dear ANU ATTIGE, Pranams to your feet. My husband showed this site and article to me. He is so much impressed with your views. Not only him, all of us in family and my parents home are deeply impressed with you. The reasonig you come up with for our traditions and reasoning for facing various practical situations is simply amazing, wonderful. To know that we are living in the same city makes us feel more thrilled. Since my husband has already considered you as AKKA, I have to take you as ATTIGE (Relatively lesser bonding ??) Our daughter is 2years 6 months now. We want to admit her to the same school where you studied as far as possible. Can you help please? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Sangeetha, Sorry for the delay. I want to write a bit longer (may be 3 posts and more) I am held up with works related to house construction I mentioned earlier. I will reply in about 2 days. Yes, I am a Kannadiga as you guessed and regularly celebrate BHEEMANA AMAVASYA. Detailed reply later. -Anu 6th Mar 2011 (2:47 PM) Name: Smita Country: India Comment: Dear Anu AKKA PRANAMS 2 ur SWEET feet. TRIED a lot AKKA. bliv me. I tried my best. Used hint frm mohans post. I wil not giv up. wil try til midnight 2day. Never took anything as serious as this AKKA bliv me. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDI JI Aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. Wonderful DIDI. How you guessed that problem would be solved within 5 minutes. Maine 5 minutes liya lekin DIDIJI immediately agreed that both of us will do pooja of our husbands on Karwa Chouth in future. i was nervous but Aap ne bola tha so I talked with difficulty. morning Aap ka message padha.. I telephoned my husband about your hint. I read his messages also. We are not able to solve the work given by you. koshish jaari rakhenge. I will start english practice with your ASHIRVADS today or tomorrow. Poora koshish karungi. But HOW you guessed my problem will solve on talking to DIDI JI. Please tell me. I will read all your messages not only Sangeetha mesages. PRANAMS Name: srini Country: India Comment: anu akka pranams to ur feet.i do take blessing from mother when i am in home...pranams again..to ur feet.. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Choti Behen KAVITA, Heartfelt Ashirvads. It is a fantastic attempt from you. Writing in a forum like this is first experience for me also. Do not bother about your English, ENGLISH is not INTELLIGENCE. Take my words. Sit with your husband for improving your English on a daily basis for one hour and you will be using SUPERB English in a month's time. You just require practice of using English. Now answers to your questions: JUST talk to your DIDI (JETHANI JI) when she is alone and I assure you -Your problem will be solved within 5 minutes. Do it and let me know. Your queries about Bheemana Amavasya Pooja - Unmarried girls take part in VRATA & Pooja for getting good husband in coming years. They are supposed to touch the feet of SUVASINIS who have done the Padapooja of their husbands, get their blessings and then Break their fast. (There are variations in this Practice also but this is what they are supposed to do). Apart from this, rest of the rituals are almost common between married and unmarried. (There may be slight variations about the number of knots etc.) For other details of Bheemana Amavasya please read my post addressed to Sangeetha. -Anu 5th Mar 2011 (12:28 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear mohan, Ashirvads. You can take one more hint from one of your own comments posted earlier. ALL the BEST. I will be happier if you try implementing the ideas from my posts rather than just enjoying them -Anu 4th Mar 2011 (11:55 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Raj, Putting hand on HEAD of the one who is touching feet is an involuntary action of all people from our culture. Your wife has a little force or pressure. On one side she is subjected to receiving NAMASKARA from husband which is unusual. On the other side she cannot disobey her husband and act against the wishes of husband. Can you talk to her separately and find out what exactly is her WISH (if both of you stay in a different city where no relatives are present). There are 4 options for her 1. She touching your feet, 2. You touching her feet, 3. Both touching each other's feet, 4. None touching other's feet. Let her think well and answer in case you have no objection for any of her choices. -Anu 4th Mar 2011 (11:42 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear LITTLE Brother srini, Heartfelt Ashircads and Hearty Congratulations. It is fantastic that you have a job on hand much before your course completion. KEEP achieving better all along your life. Now I ask you for a present. This AKKA wants the BEST performance possible from you in your exams and colourful results. DO NOT FORGET to take YOUR MOTHER'S ASHIRVADS regularly -Anu 4th Mar 2011 (11:29 PM) Name: Sandeep Country: India Comment: Dear Rakesh, Instead of posting comments as the ones in recent days, why don't you 1) Answer ANU AKKA's questions 2) Improve your earlier comments as asked by AKKA? You are the best person to improve your own comments because you have the idea behind your original comments. Why not doing it and contribute your part to the discussion useful for all. Name: KAVITA Country: India Comment: Respected ANU DIDI JI Sadar aap ka charano mein sadar pranam. I am KAVITA mohan's wife. I am graduate but from north india so i will mix hindi in between. Morning bijali gayi. Whatever i typed washed out. first time typing in THREAD (mera patidev is ko thread kehete hain) so dar lag raha hein. Nervous also. father settled in Bangalore 3 years back. married 5 months back. DIDI I have a problem similar to Sangeetha. At the time of my first KARWA CHOUTH, my father was not keeping well. So I was in parent home helping mother. In my parent family and many known families, we do pooja of husband before breaking fast. Huband stands on a wooden plank and we wash husband's feet and perform all rituals of puja. But in some families they only touch husband's feet. I am satisfied only by doing my patidev's pooja. I did so during first KArwa Choth. I heard that my husband that JETHANI JI (patidev's BHABHI) only touches feet or he is not sure. What should I do. If I do differently and do pooja I may hurt her. (It is not that ki she respects JETH JI less) She has maximum respect for her patidev) I cant ask my MIL as she is widow. If i ask her it might hurt her. What I should do. After coming to bangalore i came to know bheemana amavasya pooja. I was surprised that all schools declared holidays on that day. I was told by neighbour all about bheemana amavaya pooja. as sangeetha typed, i have seen some women just touching feet, some washing husband's feet placed in a THALI and doing pooja and some doing pooja without washing. what is correct. Also I have not understood so far what unmarried girls do. who do they worship. PRANAMS DIDI Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka waiting for ur blessing also.. Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhiji, pranams to your feet. i am the mohan who got the doubt clarified about touching younger bhabhi's feet and waiting for your highly knowlegeble and writing about EIR. but i am not in a hurry. in fact write at the end. it is a great experience to open this page to check if you have written about EIR but read others questions and your GEM answers. we feel ourselves BLESSED on reading anything written by you. can you give one more hint about improving rakesh's comments. my wife, me and my collegue tried hard but unable to add a few words to make "TRUE VALUE ADD". my wife KAVITA will continue to put one of her doubts. i have to leave for office. pranams. Name: Raj Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka, you are almost right but one thing is there. When I go to touch my wife's feet, she verbally tries to stop me. But ultimately she accepts it.Even at that time she also keeps her hands on my head like my childhood. Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka pranams to ur holy feet.akka i got placed in one of the MNC now waiting to get my course complete... Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai anu.the best thing happening here is that instead of just receiving namaskaras you are showing these young kids a direction in life, how to succeed and how to maintain a positive attitude which is great.you have the calibre to motivate others and continue the good.one simple question- if you can change the lives of many through your words and deeds why do you stick with this hectic job which eats away your time and compromises your care for all dear and near.its just a question ok. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 13 : Dear Vani, Ashirvads. I have also applied for leave today as my son is not keeping well. He is sleeping now and I am checking posts in this forum. It is definitely not grammar spellings sort of things to be improved. TRUE VALUE ADDITION is what I expect. You can make any number of attempts. I will wait till 5th march midnight. Keep your Head and mind balanced. Don't get swayed away by the SHOWERS of PRAISES you are receiving. Lot of Hard work needed to succeed in IAS (about 15 to 16 hours of study per day according to my 2 friends who have done it). Do not have a feeling that you were SPOON FED. Your contribution does exist in the whole episode. You planned the exact HISSING dialogues. My only suggestion is "focus your energy on positive things instead of such HISSINGS". This is good enough to start with. I will write separately about all that. WHY DO YOU WANT to BECOME LIKE ME ? Why not better ??? I will be a SINNER according to our TRADITIONS if I BLESS you to become just like me. I will be very happy if you achieve BETTER THAN ME. Everything needs HARD WORK. More about it later. Now this is for CHACHI (your mother): Dear CHACHI Pranams to your feet again. You have a great motherly heart to pray GOD for my well being. You are lighting lamps in my name (as tens of other mothers have been doing for several years now). What else is needed as a QUALIFICATION to receive my NAMASKARA ? Back to you Vani : You will yourself know the reason for my reluctantance about disclosing my birthday within 15 days. If not, I will tell you. -Anu 3rd Mar 2011 (2:09 PM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear LITTLE Brother srini, ALL THE BEST. Do not forget to write when you achieve something. -Anu 3rd Mar 2011 (1:28 PM) Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. Now I can freely write. First time you have disappointed me AKKA. Why aren't you disclosing your birthday? May I know the reason? We (my mother and myself) have continuous dinner invitations (from the 8 and others also including my principal) The news is spread. Our Principal told my mother that I would definitely make it up and finish IAS with TOP ranking as I have already shown the quality of handling sensitive situations with FANTASTIC outcome at a very very young age. I know the reality that I was SPOON FED from you. All younger ones in the houses we have visited are touching my feet with true respect and involvement. I silently place all that and the Showers of praises I receive on YOUR FEET. AKKA please guide me to become like you. I tried my best along with my mother to improve Rakesh's comment as you mentioned. But could not find anything other than Grammar to improve. I know your intention is not that. Can I make more than one attempt also? PRANAMS AKKA. Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I am not going to college today due to yeasterday night's JAGARANA. We are not supposed to sleep today in day time to get the fruits of yesterday's JAGARANA as I am told. The best way is to spend time in good and sacred works like reading your posts. First my mother wants to tell (I am translating and typing as earlier)- ANU I do not have any MERIT or WORTHINESS (Yogyate in Kannada / Sanskrit) to receive NAMASKARA from an enlightened SOUL like you. I am only elder in age. You are so humble with that huge knowledge and enlightenment. it is TRUE that humbleness grows with TRUE knowledge and enlightenment. Without that the knowledge or skill is useless and dangerous to society. As a duty after receiving NAMASKARA, I can only BLESS as GOD BLESS YOU (anything beyond this for a SOUL like you is out of my capacity). But Please convey my PRANAMS to the feet of your PARENTS and PILs. All 4 of them must be elder to me and are heavily BLESSED to get a daughter / daughter-in-law like you. If you consider me "CHACHI", your mother becomes my AKKA, your FIL my elder bother and your MIL my elder SIL. etc. I want to ask you something more. Will do it today evening or later. My daughter continues: It is me AKKA once again. This is already lengthy. I will write in another post. PRANAMS. Name: srini Country: India Comment: Anu akka thanks for ur advice i will work hard to grab opportunities akka Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear SWEET Smita, Ashirvads. I will ask you to do one simple work. IMPROVE the comments of Dr. Rakesh posted after my post labelled "VANI 5" dated 21st Feb 2011 (ADD or insert or modify less than 5 words). The portion of his comment I am asking you to IMPROVE is reproduced here for your convenience : "im so impressed with your knowledge and it is so hard to believe that you are only 26 years old and on top of that you are a professional!" I will wait for 2 to 3 days to see how you would improve. IN FACT I REQUEST ALL PEOPLE READING THE POSTS OF THIS FORUM to improve the said portion of the comment according to their VIEW in about 2 to 3 days. -Anu 3nd Mar 2011 (12:20 AM) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Raj, Now I will put the scenario this way (as I have understood): Please correct me if my understanding is not correct. 1. The 3 parties involved (refer to my post labelled "Vani 3" dated 21st Feb 2011) in the act of touching feet before your marriage are youeself, your wife and other seniors of family respectively and nobody had a problem. 2. After marriage 3rd Parties want Your Wife to be 1st Party (Doing namaskara) and YOU to be 2nd Party (Receiving namaskara). 3. After your marriage you want to continue touching her feet and You do not like your wife to touch your feet. 4. After marriage Your wife (if there is no one to put any sort of pressure) DOES not LIKE TOUCHING your feet and she does not LIKE you TOUCHING her feet also. i.e. she does not want to DO namaskara to you or RECEIVE namaskara from you. Please confirm if I have understood it correct. If I have not understood, give me the correct picture. -Anu 2nd Mar 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear srini, Ashirvads. Work hard and BE PREPARED to GRAB opportunities when you get them. Ashirvads alone never work. For Ashirvads to work, you have to put the best effort from your side and "BE PREPARED". -Anu 2nd Mar 2011 Name: srini Country: India Comment: Respected anu akka pranams to ur holy feet i am studying akka "masters"degree Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: dear sanjay why bother about my views?im very reluctant to touch the feet of others because its not routinely done in kerala!please carry on Name: Raj Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka, My answers of your questions are: 1. Yes we did love marriage. 2. No we did not discuss about this before marriage. 3. I touched her feet in school and college days in occasions and it was in public. 4. I have read almost all points of you in this forum. 5. In that situation my wife does not touch my feet but when I want to touch her feet, first she denies but ultimately she accepts it. 6. My mother, elder sister, my mother in law. Everybody thinks she should touch my feet. 7. My mother in law also think that my wife should touch my feet. In some occasions she forced her to touch my feet. I am waiting for your reply. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. Please convey my Pranams to CHACHI (your mother). Thanks for the observation about my age. Yes I completed 27 years few days back. I was born in 1984, February month but don't ask for the date. My name is ANUPAMA. Feeling very sleepy. -Anu 2nd Mar2011 Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: anu even though i joined surgery last year my dream was to become a paediatrician(last year my rank was 2564 for all india pg entrance with which its impossible to get paeds)this year in my 2nd attempt i got 560 and i have taken MD paediatrics at kims hubli.its 20 hrs from here but im happy. Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I finally gave up. The pressure from my Mother and Aunt was so much that I told them about you and this forum. But after taking a promise from them that they will never tell anybody without my consent!!! They have promised me by placing their PALM on my head while I was holding their feet. So they will not break their promise. Lots and Lots to talk to you AKKA. Now onwards it is my mother (Primary school teacher) who is writing (She is telling and I am translating & typing). ANU I knew that there was somebody advising my daughter but never had an imagination that help will come from Internet. I thought Internet is used only for mails and voice chat. I had to believe when my daughter showed me. I do not know how to thank GOD for giving YOU as GURU to my daughter. We are Bramhins and I was ashamed that for at least 2 generations none had an education worth mentioning. I was happy that my only daughter was intelligent (more than 90% in SSLC and PUC) and was aiming to do IAS. I was sad that I could not get more children due to medical problems. But Now I believe that GOD gives something while taking away something. We do not know your exact age (you have mentioned 26 years 10 months but no date for that post). Now are you 26 or 27 ? I light 20 lamps tomorrow (Mahashivaratri) in the name of my daughter. i want to light in your name also. Please don't refuse. My daughter's name is not VANI. It is only the name we call her at home. What is your name? My daughter will continue. AKKA It is me again. Please give your birthday and name AKKA. PRANAMS Name: Smita Country: India Comment: Dear Anu AKKA PRANAMS 2 ur SWEET feet. Im 22 software engr. like u. how do u manag time. ur ofice and readng. my mom always puts som r other restrictions (she luvs me lot). but many things my mom used 2 tel me which I was not convinced. After readng ur posts in ths thread Im convinced. Why. is it bcoz of generatin gap. bye AKKA. my team leader is caling me. Name: Sangeetha Country: India Comment: Anu, I have a doubt in regardance to the Bheemana Amavasya Puja. I believe you are a kannadiga and must have celebrated it. I am a kannadiga too. Is it customary to wash our husband's feet on that day? My mother never did so. But I've seen a few of my husband's relatives do it. Name: Sangeetha Country: India Comment: Anu, I have to completely agree with you on the whole namaskara thing. As parents we need to be role models to our children in every way possible. If you want your child to touch your feet, you need to set the example by yourself. In my family, we've employed the habit of touching elder's feet daily in the morning and night. The little children do it as well. And some cousins tend to ask, how come our children aren't willing to touch our feet? When I was growing up, my mother used to touch my dad's feet daily in front of all of us. And then we would touch both our parent's feet when they stood together and blessed us. That is the same thing me and my sisters follow after getting married. Even though my husband insisted me to not touch his feet, I said ok for sometime. But after our child was born, I began the habit of touching his feet in the morning and night. And we taught our son to do it as well. He is 8 now and our daughter is 5. Both touch our feet daily. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: One more important criterea in a medical college is the physical location of library and hostel as I heard. Ladies' Hostel, College & Library are all located within same Premises in KIMS Hubli. Boy's hostel I do not know. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, KIMS Hubli is very good college. it is rated as No. 3 in Karnataka after BMC (Bangalore) and MMC (Mysore). That is the order in which seats are preferred by TOPPERS in Karnataka CET. For your satisfaction I asked my father-in-law. But the best people to rate the college are students (current and recently passed out). What is very important as I heard in a medical college is the ratio of Students to patients (both out patients and in patients). This ratio is quite high in KIMS Hubli. One should have a very high ranking to get a seat there. Hubli is about 400 Kms. from Bangalore (May be Exactly 411 Kms) on National Highway No 4. Hubli is well connected from Bangalore and other places by BUS and TRAIN. It is the headquarters of SOUTHWESTERN RAILWAY. Third largest City of Karnataka after Bangalore and Mysore. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear srini, My heartfelt Ashirvads. May GOD give you good opportunities to GRAB. What are you doing ? Studying or Working ? -Anu 1st Mar 2011 Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: anu how is karnataka institute of medical s ciences hubli? how far is it from blore?is it a really good college? just ask your father in law Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. feeling myself ashamed AKKA for MUGGING up part of Rigveda without understanding. My Veda teacher made us made us practice vedic hymns with plesent tone and we were thinking ourselves (all students) superior in childhood to others who did not mug up vedas. In our veda school, questioning GURU was treated as SIN and we were told GURU knows what has to be told to whom and when and we should simply follow. I never questioned anything but I have seen How a questioning senior was treated. Our AIM was to chant Vedic Hymns without missing anything including the tone and raga. Later when I grew up I tried reading the translations of but did not understand anything. It all appeared meaningless. How is that you know the REAL MEANING with PROPER APPLICATION - I mean females are not given Vedic Education conventionally. My respect to you in just boundless. Reading each comment from you is a fantastic experience. Your clarification about what is HINDUISM -SIMPLY SUPERB, GREAT, UNCOMPARABLE. I was proud to be hindu without any understanding. Any amount of PRANAMS to your HOLY feet is insufficient for making me realize what HINDUISM is. AKKA I feel I have not understood your explanation fully about answering on behalf of Rakesh. Humble request AKKA. PRANAMS once again Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Raj, Before taking up your question which requires lengthy reply, few questions to you. 1. I guess your's is love marriage Is it correct ? 2. Did you discuss about who should touch whoose feet before marriage ? 3. Were you touching her feet before marriage during school days when she was a tutor and if so, did it continue during college days and further ? Was it in Private or Public ? 4. Have you read all posts of this forum (atleast questions from others and my replies to them ? 5. In a situation of no force from anybody, what is your wife's opinion about touching your feet or getting her feet touched ? 6. Among the senior female family members who are forcing her to touch you feet, How many are really close to you (like mother) ? 7. What are the expectations from your wife's parental home regarding this matter ? Waiting for your reply. -Anu 28th Feb 2011 Name: srini Country: India Comment: Reapected ANU akka i just need your "ashirvaad"s i am constant follower or ur views great knowlegde u have akka.i silently bow to ur knowledge...plz receive my pranams to ur holy feet.. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear srini, Ashirvads. Why have you stopped with only "Pranams" ? Nothing to comment or express ?? Name: Raj Country: India Comment: Respected Anu Akka, I have a problem. My wife is two year senior to me and she was my tutor when I was a school student. But according to our tradition during our wedding she was forced to touch my feet and in some festival like Karwa Chauth she also has to touch my feet. Definitely I do not allow her to touch my feet but some senior female members in our family force her to touch my feet. I respect her as my teacher and every morning I touch her feet. At that time she also tries to stop me. It is a peculiar situation. She touches my feet publically and I touch her feet privately. Please advise me what we should do about this situation. Name: Raj Country: India Comment: Respected Anu Akka, I have a problem. My wife is two year senior to me and she was my tutor when I was a school student. But according to our tradition during our wedding she was forced to touch my feet and in some festival like Karwa Chauth she also has to touch my feet. Definitely I do not allow her to touch my feet but some senior female members in our family force her to touch my feet. I respect her as my teacher and every morning I touch her feet. At that time she also tries to stop me. It is a peculiar situation. She touches my feet publically and I touch her feet privately. Please advise me what we should do about this situation. Name: srini Country: India Comment: Pranams Anu akka Name: srini Country: India Comment: Pranams Anu akka Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Sanjay, Ashirvads. I have to answer your 2 questions. 1st one WHY I pick examples from NON HINDU Philosophies? There is nothing wrong in that. In fact THAT IS THE GREATNESS of HINDUISM. That is one of the foundation stones of HINDUISM. It is clearly said in RIG VEDA "AA NOO BHADRAAHA KRATAVOO YANTU VISHWATAHA" meaning "LET NOBLE THOUGHTS COME TO US FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD". HINDUISM is not RIGID or STAGNANT WATER or FENCED. It is OPEN, IMPROVING every moment, UPDATING ITSELF with all NOBLE thoughts. This UNIQUE DISTINCTIVE characteristic makes HINDUISM stand TALL. Thus HINDUISM is not having any BOUNDARY. It is GROWING forever. One of my personal experience may be shared later in this forum about this quote. Your 2nd question- Permission to answer on behalf of Dr. Rakesh- Who am I to permit you? It is Dr. Rakesh who has to permit you. In spite of such permission from Dr. Rakesh, the discussion will not go on the same lines as Dr. Rakesh himself participating. This is because both of you have different mindsets. You have never discussed anything in depth for considerably long periods and have same or similar views. Your approach is accepting certain practices of HINDU and INDIAN culture. His approach is protesting and questioning them. Why shouldn't we think positively about him. He might be BUSY or may be some other genuine reason which we cannot guess sitting in different palce. However I will answer any of your questions even if they are similar to that of Dr. Rakesh. -Anu 28th Feb 2011 Name: Sanjay Country: India Comment: Respected ANU AKKA pranams to your holy feet. I am 25 years old and nowhere near you in knowledge. Working as a civil engineer. As Vani said, we know many stories and facts before hand only but not the proper use of it. I discussed about entire comments posted by you with my parents and they say it requires ANUGRAHA from God to get to your state that too at your age and only one in a CRORE might get it. Atleast we are lucky and blessed that we have known you. According to my parents even knowing people like you is GOd's Anugraha. How do you and Why do you pickup examples outside HINDU philosophy? I am not objecting just humble question of a student. More important thing- Will you permit me to Answer on behalf of Rakesh (He may not bother or may be his EGO is not permiting him). But we are not ready to miss the rare, exceptional experience of our lives by readig your answers. One more reason is to answer such people as Rakesh effectively in our lives. Once again PRANAMS and waiting for your permission Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet. We are back after exams, holidays. Read all new posts Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. Sorry I did not post after returning from college. Everything went very well in college. There were only 7 girls excluding the 2 who assisted me. Since much more than Sorry was over for these 2, totally 56 SORRY sessions were needed. But before completing about 20 to 25, the rest volunteered, held the hands / hugged all 8 and said It's OK. Even others (20 to 25) had reacted similarly. Lots said SORRY to the 8 for revenging remarks (We had told them the exact sentence you advised WORD by WORD. i.e. "They have teased for fun and underwent all the HELL for 2 days. Now that we know the consequence, we will get worse than this sometime later in our lives if we tease them for taking revenge". Now my HERO image is extended to 3 more circles: Circle of 8, Circle of their mothers, Some of our Lecturers and Principal (They enquired what was happening when the students did not disperse on a Saturday quickly and congratulated me for the whole thing. I am placing all the HERO image and the showers of praise I received ON YOUR FEET along with my HEAD AKKA. If you find me deserving enough, BLESS me to become like you and show me the path. By the time I returned home, I was shocked to know that my mother and Aunt (Father's sister) had known everything (over telephone from far relatives) and started questioning me about "How I got so much SMART" all of a sudden. Both of them know very clearly that it is not my brain behind all this. Rest of the people do not know. I have not so far told anybody about you. But don't know how far I can withstand the pressure from them. We (My mother & myself) were invited for dinner by one of the far relatives today. During the dinner again all praises for me. While leaving, my friend (one of the 8) was told by her mother to touch my mother's feet and take blessings and she did it to me also despite nobody telling her and amidst my refusal. Tomorrow's lunch and dinner programs are at other far relatives' homes. All are praising my mother for bringing me UP SO WELL. All this is too much for me to digest AKKA. I am unable to ask you so many things I thought about earlier. I need some time to settle. I will continue later AKKA, PRANAMS. Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. RUSHING to college. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 11: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. Good that everything ended well at their homes. Even I have to tell you lot to learn from all this but later. Now rush to your college. Let them say SORRY to all girls who were teased earlier (There may not be more than 10 to 15 of them) separately in PUBLIC helding their hands if required. Remember - There would be totally 120 SORRY sessions if there are 15 girls got teased. From your side and your TWO friends who assisted you for HISSING, tell all friends "They have teased for fun and underwent all the HELL for 2 days. Now that we know the consequence, we will get worse than this sometime later in our lives if we tease them for taking revenge" Do not forget to tell that all of them have confessed to their mothers and how difficult it was to confess. All the BEST. -Anu 26th Feb 2011 Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. It is over. My senior and myself bunked 2 hours in the morning today. It was quite tougher than what we imagined. First problem was getting Privacy during evening and early morning hours. Other problems were with the girls confessing. They could not open their mouth so easily and their mothers were asking us (my senior and me) what happened. But We just replied "She will tell" as per your advice. All of them broke down while confessing. 2 of them were slapped by their mothers, We pleaded them not to with with folded hands and tears in our eyes. All mothers told the confessing girls to touch our feet and say sorry. I am younger to 4 of them and firmly refused. They still touched my knees. Others held my feet tightly with tearful eyes and sobs which was very embarrassing for me. My senior was in the same state of mind. One very important information which missed out previously was the HISSING DIALOGUE (I had planned but not used) "Let's give an AD. GROOMS wanted for special girls. All elders from grooms side need to touch Bride's feet..." But this dialogue was discussed by my friends in college. But all mothers appreciated me for teaching a fitting lesson to their daughters. 4 younger ones have started calling me AKKA (3 of them my far relatives and never did it before) without anybody telling them. All 8 of them are truly very close to me now. MOST IMPORTANT of all- They are TOTALLY relieved now. I have to clarify lots from you AKKA but later. Now waiting for your next ADVICE AKKA. Today may be a holiday for you. Our college is there upto 2:00 PM today. All 8 of them are at home waiting for my instructions. I will keep checking for your reply every 30 minutes. Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: ANU AKKA, I am in que after VANI Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I called all of them and informed them as per your advice. My senior and myself are now starting to first house. My senior will pick me in about 2 minutes. But may not be possible to cover all today AKKA. We are supposed to reach home by 7:30 PM. But whoever is left out today will be covered tomorrow before going to college. All my far relatives (three) would be covered today continuously. PRANAMS AKKA. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. Go ahead. Make sure that only they speak to their mothers and not you. You can at the most say "..wants to tell you something aunty.." After they speak out, you can tell that you did not have any intention of hurting.. Tell all of them to PREPARE WELL before talking to their mothers about what all they speak and do. Ensure Privacy (only mother, daughter and one or two of you). Let them tell the WHOLE truth without hiding anything. Try finishing as many as possible today itself (if possible all the 8). All the BEST- Your Anu AKKA 25th Feb 2011 Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. All 8 of them are ready to CONFESS before their mothers. But they are asking one or two of us to be present at that time. They are not confident to face their mothers alone in this matter. Most of us stay within 3 to 4 Kms. We have Scooty. But what is your advice? Hope you have not yet checked this reply. I saw your post in the college and immediately contacted all of them. Other than them, my senior and myself nobody knows about CONFESSION plan. Waiting for your advice AKKA. Pranams Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Vani, Ashirwads. It is very good that they have realised. Solution is very simple. They will have to make up their mind and be courageous. Let them CONFESS to their respective mothers. They will then be out of fear that somebody would call their home. I will tell you next step after knowing if they are ready for that and other developments. I will check for your reply after 16:00 PM today. Anu 25th Feb 2011 Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet dearest AKKA. I am so glad that you have "WITHDRAWN" the word. Relieved a lot now. But situation in college in out of control AKKA. The news is spread that VANI (myself) made a brilliant plan to teach them a lesson.. I have got a HERO image overnight. Lot of girls are teasing old sadist group. They either pass similar comments as in birthday or that they missed my birthday (to witness their sad faces) or just "LINCOLN affected" or "Poor HISSED one" etc. The old group is totally down and scared to core. I tried talking to three of them together. They offered to HOLD my legs and beg pardon. I stopped them. They admitted that had attended my birthday with a bad intention of teasing me as they had heard about my mother worship. They are openly admitting their mistake and they are not angry with me. They are scared that if not from me others might get their home numbers and call their home.. I thought the whole night. No solution. AKKA it YOU and only YOU who can save them. I am ready to do anything. Please GUIDE me. Pranams Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 8: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. I belong to the same school of thoughts which believes " mere words from deserving elders knowingly or unknowingly will act as blessings or curses". My usage was not intentional. I agree I never use it with my siblings or younger blood relatives. Not just that- it is prohibited even among real closer friend circle for elders to use it while talking to younger ones. I will be hurting your feelings again if I say "SORRY". So I mention that I am WITHDRAWING my word and assure you that I will not repeat it in future. "PASHCHATTAPA" is the best way for "PRAYASHCHITTA". Do not worry. The lesson for you is "Never use a weapon unless you have full control over that or hand over the weapon to people who use it without responsibility" A classic example for this is from MAHABHARATA. Arjuna was able to RECALL BRAMHASTRA but ASHWATTHAMA did not know how to RECALL. That resulted in WORST possible CURSE in the history of mankind. Moral is very clear from this. Now cheer up. Let me know how well you manage rebuilding the relation -Anu 24th Feb 2011 Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I am so glad that you have blessed your little sister with such fantastic example of GANDHIJI. It is far beyond my imagination. You are so good like Gandhi & Buddha that nobody can become your enemies. Even if they did, you have the power to convert them. We all have read about Ashoka and Kalinga war only to write in the exams and forget it. Your son must be very lucky to have a treasure of stories as his own mother. I do not know how lucky your grandchildren would be. But how do these things flash to you at right time? How can I become like you? BUT AKKA, I felt bad that you have used the word "REQUEST" for me. My mother has been telling me that mere words from deserving elders knowingly or unknowingly will act as blessings or curses. Do you use the same word for correcting the mistakes of your siblings and younger blood relatives? Or is it that our mistake has made you use it without your knowledge? Akka punish me whatever way you feel like for my mistakes. Who else apart from my parents and you should do it? But please do not curse me. But AKKA, it was really beyond my control. I will put my best effort to rebuild the relation and update you. PRANAMS once again AKKA. Sorry I switched off the PC yesterday when my mother and aunt came near me and could not check your blessings yesterday. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 7: Dear Vani, May whatever good you dream become a reality. My heartfelt Ashirvads on this day which is so special for you. Now THE VERY GOOD Quality I noticed- You have mentioned "..We are not anywhere near Buddha..". From this it is clear that you are identifying your limitations. This goes a long way in planning effectively for a successful result. According to an analysis, this was one of the greatest strengths of Mahatma Gandhi. Gandhiji identified his (and Indian people's) strengths and limitations to the best possible extent and hence he could successfully plan the route to freedom. It is considered as one of the greatest long term plans. If you do not identify your limitation and over estimate yourself, you always end up making a wrong plan. Similarly you should identify your strengths also. Be calm and introspect regularly for achieving this. But I feel that HISSING was not needed. "Lincoln Treatment" was good enough. I clearly mentioned "..If they are not sensitive for this also you may have to HISS.." You have mentioned that Lincoln Treatment had its effect on them. Then why HISSING? I understand the frustration, tension etc. undergone by some of you from them in the past. But still there is no point you people stooping down to their level. They are your friends and some of them your distant relatives. Understand one thing- For you to win the other need not LOOSE. If you can achieve WIN-WIN (I win You WIN), situation, it is best and TRUE win. What were Emperor Ashoka's feelings after KALINGA war ? You are a very good girl. That is the reason You felt bad for the saddened girls. May I request you to talk to those saddened girls and build a healthy realtion (It is tougher than breaking). -Anu 23rd Feb 2011 Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. All guests left and I am in front of PC. I enjoyed the entire day. Satisfied myself completely by worshiping my mother. I have done your POOJA also mentally AKKA. Seek your SPECIAL BLESSINGS today. I had explained what has to be done to two of my best friends. As soon as all friends assembled in my room after Pooja rituals, it was as expected. one girl from the sadistic group started "Ohh How funny! Vani from 18th century does all shameful awkward things..Poor Vani. Anyway Thanks for nice entertainment yaar". The other added "We pity other friends in college who missed the great show. Let us ask them to tell Vani for arranging one more, Ha Ha Ha". I kept quiet as it was my birthday and I had assigned the JOB of replying them to my friends. One of the TWO friends (to whom I had explained the plan) started "Hey in your house is it the role reversal your mother washes your feet and touches your feet on your birth day?" We saw how they panicked. They never expected this. The other of the TWO friends (my senior who was harassed by sadistic group after her engagement) HISSED "Let us find out. Vani get me the phone numbers of their house. I will find out talking to their mothers about the great 23rd Century practice they follow in their house". The sadists got the shock of their life. One of them started sobbing and other was in tears. Others from sadistic group started apologizing to my friend and myself. My friend said "OK we are leaving it at that. But if you attempt these bad things on anybody again, we will really do it" I was watching the whole episode with a smile on my face. The girls who were subjected to one are other teasing from the sadistic group were all enjoying with VICTORY Smiles. I myself felt bad a bit for the saddened girls and changed the topic. All went well thereafter. Anu AKKA, I have no words to express for getting me my confidence back. Waiting for your Special Blessings AKKA. Name: Datta Country: India Comment: The true meaning behind a namaskara is quite different from what all people believe. It is not to seek someone's blessings. It is rather to dissolve one's karma. There are different types of Karma in this universe. But the two main karmas are Prarabdha Karma and Sanchita Karma. Prarabdha karma is the karma you've created in your past life. All this karma adds up and causes you to be born in a particular family possessing certain traits so that you can fulfil the prarabdha. Sanchit karma is the karma we create in our present lives as a result of our impulses (not desires). Due to our impusles and cravings, we tend to move away from the true path of prarabdha karma. When we do so, suffering is caused and experienced. If one just fulfils his prarabdha karma as he is supposed to by carefully using the power of choice and action, he will certainly feel more peaceful and will suffer less in his lifetime. But it is also impossible to live without creating Sanchit karma. Sanchit karma creates conflict and puts us in an illusionary world. If one suffers from depression / frustration / disatisfaction all the time, it is because they've deviated from the main path. It creates illusionary troubles for us. Everyone creates Sanchit Karma. But only a few are aware of it. If there is sanchit created, the soul will have to be reborn again to finish it and it cannot be liberated into a higher form of being. The only way to dissolve one's Sanchit is through awareness. Awareness cannot be gained by everyone. That's why we all seek an external Guru/God. Hindu Dharma has given us various Gods/Gurus to help dissolve one's sanchit. They help you become aware of your Sanchit and help you follow the right path. That is the primal duty of a GURU - to give awareness to the disciple. The act of doing a namaskara is one way of dissolving one's sanchit. By nature, there are two roles played by living beings including humans. It's the role of the Guru and the Sishya. During almost each phase (friendship, love, business partnership) - one plays the role of a teacher and the other plays the disciple teaching the two souls different aspects and making them fulfil their prarabdha by destroying the ignorance. Unconsciously by your thoughts and actions, your prarabdha is fulfilled naturally. However, Sanchita cannot be dissolved unless you are conscious of what you are creating. Awareness can only be given by a Guru. One person cannot be the ultimate GURU to every person. However, praying to a God/ GURU does help in giving you a certain level of awareness over your deeds. According to Hindu Dharma, For a person in a particular stage of life - The Guru is different. The act of doing a namaskara with utmost respect for the other person makes two things happen on an unconscious level: - you acknowledge the fact that you have deviated from the true path(prarabdha karma). - you ask for forgiveness and pray that the karma is dissolved. While doing a namaskara, this is the state of mind that must be present to have the above effect. - utmost reverence and belief that the body is not yours but your GURUs. - you are nothing but a dust in their feet This state of mind requires TRUE submission of the EGO. And one who can totally release the EGO and submit can dissolve all their Sanchita Karam. Even though this is something easy in action, it is not easy for most of us to do because of our EGO. Praising our GURU itself is a problem for most of us. Doing the namaskara once alone isn't enough. It must be done every day on a continuous basis as that is the only way to dissolve all the sanchit being created and that has been created. Once in the morning as soon as one rises, it must be done to their MAIN GURU. The next namaskara must be done during Sunset. And one before the night(sleep). The MAIN Guru is different for each of us. For a small child - the guru is the father and mother. For a student - the teacher. For a married man - family deity/father if alive. . For a married woman - her husband. For a celibate man - himself(This is called self-realization which cannot be achieved by many of us due to our attachments). This has to be followed regularly. Take for example, a woman and her husband. A lot of women feel beneath their level to do a namaskara to their husbands. Some women do but a lot of women don't. A lot of women do namaskaram to their husband's only on the day of a festival like the karadaiyan nonbu or varalakshmi vratam, etc. And they usually do this once in a while not every year either. But that is not the true path of dharma. A woman must bow down to her husband with utmost respect and devotion daily. She must fulfil the duties as a wife and her husband must fulfil his duties as a husband and the head of the family. Every householder(not just the woman) must wake up before Sunrise and pay salutations by prostration to their Main GURU. A woman has to prostrate at her husband, a child at his parents, a student to his GURU. This has to be done in the evening as well during sunset. So I'm here to say that each of us must do the namaskara to our main GURU on a daily basis until we reach a point in our lives when we can realize our own GURU(which will take years) and destroy all the Sanchita we've created. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 6: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. If my internet is not down or I get into any extreme emergency situation, I will post my reply on 23rd after reading your experience. I Will expalin the good quality noticed in you. HOLY, LOTUS etc. are the words to glorify the feet according to our feelings. There are other words also like DEVINE etc. But so far I have not found a single suitable word for glorifying my Guruji's feet to express my feelings effectively. Not mentioning anything is due to this reason and it only remains in my mind. -Anu 22nd Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, Thanks for updating me about the timing of getting SURGEON tag. But what I meant was about the busy schedules. 1.e. As a student your schedules must be taking a lot of time and inconsistent also depending on many factors like criticality of patients etc. Never accept anything unless your CONCISE approves it. A lesson taught to Swami Vivekananda by his GURU Ramakrisha Paramahamsa was to test everything including GURU. Swami Vivekananda updated the same (This is not the right time to mention the update). Sharing jokes and having food together are not same. Did you argue with your Professors in the initial days of MBBS? Medical Cource as the one you are undergoing and Veena learning are two different SYSTEMS. Expecting one system to be like other will not help in any way. But you have not answered my questions directly. Try answering them (I know your difficulty). Just overcome the barrier. You will then understand the behavior of Veena teacher and may be you will LEARN it from her. I will post my experience with an attempt to learn Marshal Arts at a later stage which may be useful. -Anu 22nd Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear jaggu, Your exams must be nearing. Study well. All the best. You can participate in these discussions after your exams Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. My GREAT AKKA. I am now confident. I knew my dearest AKKA will guide me. Akka one request. You have mentioned in your post labeled "Vani 2" that you have noticed a good quality in me. May I request you to BLESS me by telling it to me on my birth day ? If you decide some time later, let it be. It is only request. But you are the best Judge to decide when to bless me with what. Also one question AKKA. While making PRANAMS to you, people have been mentioning your feet as LOTUS or HOLY etc. But for your GURUJI you have not mentioned anything like that. I know that you will have a strong reason for that. I have simply copied you but at times I feel like mentioning something like that for your feet. If you feel I can know the reason please let me know. I will post my birthday experience on 23rd in the night and I will not sleep till I receive your BLESSINGS on that day. Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: i wholeheartedly welcome you and your entire family including your father in law(surgeon)to kerala GODS OWN COUNTRY! Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai anu!im not a surgeon but just a pg student who will become a surgeon in 2 years time.im so impressed with your knowledge and it is so hard to believe that you are only 26 years old and on top of that you are a professional!i meant that i share a very healthy relATION WITH MY PROFESSOR. i have never touched his feet or hasnt prostrated before him!we argue about new developments have food together and i never accept anything without logic!but with the veena teacher none of these things are possible. respect is in the mind isnt it? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, waiting for your reply. The discussion would be a good value add and informative. But I do not know your busy schedules as a surgeon. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 5: Continuing, Now hints for you to react- If your friends are THICK skinned as you mentioned, you can get a cue from an incidence from the life of Abraham Lincoln. There are silghtly different versions of this incidence. But the message is same. Once a foreign diplomat saw Lincoln polishing his shoes and asked him "Mr. President, You black your own boots ??" Lincoln replied "Yes whoose do you black?" Your reaction can be on these lines. If they are not sensitive for this also you may have to HISS. The story goes like this. Once a huge cobra approached a Swamiji who was passing by and confessed that it had killed many animals and humans without a valid reason and was repenting about the SIN it had committed. Swamiji adviced it not to repeat the SIN and left the place. Later it was killing preys only for its food and became very calm. But people who had known this started troubling it and the news spread. Cobra had lot of wounds from stone hits by the time Swamiji returned in the same route. He asked cobra the reason and after learning what had happend, told the cobra "I only told you not to BITE. I never stopped you from HISSING to threaten people and protect yourself". All the best. I have applied for leave in my office to attend house construction work. Have to leave now Anu 21st Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 4: Continuing, The Story goes like this: Once a father and his son in teen age buy a donkey in a market place and start walking towards their village along with it. Afetr certain distance, some people on the road commented something like "They are wasting their energy. One of them can ride the donkey". So the son sat on the donkey and the journey continued. Some time later the comment was "What bad times are coming ! Aged father walking and younger son enjoying the ride". So they swapped the palces and continued. Next comment after some distance was "Oh ! Poor little boy is made to walk and Strong GROWN UP man is riding". They thought for while and continued the journey -this time both of them riding. Some distance later they heard people commenting "What kind of cruelty towards the poor animal..." Last option left to them was to carry the donkey on their head. And even if they did it, people would not be satified. Instead they would become a subjcet for LAUGH and FUN. So do not try to satisfy all undeserving friends. Instead focus on satisfying your CONCISE and people who care for you. -Anu 21st Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 3: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. In the act of Namaskara or touching feet, 3 parties are involved. One doing Namskara, 2nd receiving the same and 3rd the people around watching it. You should never bother about what people around think and comment (unless they are very close to you). Read my post to "mohan". I have mentioned that mohan's mother has to be taken into confidence before stopping namaskaras to his Bhabhi's feet in case he considers her UNDESERVING. In your case you do not need to care for what 3rd party thinks or comments. Become BOLD and CONFIDENT. The act of Namskara is not a SIN or CRIME. It is not an act which requires privacy (like having bath or changing dress). It is one of the "DEAREST THINGS" (when you do it to your mother) according to your post. So why bother? I will Illustarte with a story known to almost everybody -Anu 21st Feb 2011 Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: im studying in eleventh class! my name is jagadeesh chandran(jaggu).i aspire to be a doctor Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I understood what you have mentioned. I discussed the same with like minded friend without revealing that I got the idea from you. We feel that those sadistic girls are THICK skinned and not as sensitive as Buddha's detractor. They (sadistic girls) are far relatives and I cannot avoid them also. My birth day falls on 23rd Feb and I have to invite them for the entire day as I would be completing 20 years. We celebrate 1st 5th 10th 15th 20th etc. years completion a bit grand. As far as I remember, I have been touching my parents' feet in the morning after Special Pooja and before cake cutting in the evening. For the past 6 years, I have been worshiping my mother in morning. I am really nervous about the fun they would make even about touching feet of my mother. What to do? How to react? Sorry for the delay as I had to discuss with my friend. I know AKKA that you would give some very good idea to face the situation. PRANAMS AKKA. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear jaggu, Very very sorry about your mother's death. I did not know. Hope I have not hurt you (by reminding about your mother). What are you studying ? 10th Standard or 11th (1st year PUC)? Dear CommonSense, I will post my views about the points raised by you later. Anu 19th Feb 2011 Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: sorry anu deedi i was so unlucky that my mom passed away even before i could call her so! i live with my dad who is too busy.most of the time im alone! Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 2 Dear Vani, Ashirvads. Not reacting is not the solution. Buddha reacted with fruit. Otherwise his detractor would not have understood. I noticed one very good quality in you from your previous post (I will tell about it later). I will wait for your reply now about how you would react. Anu 18th Feb 2011 Name: CommonSense Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, I hope u should be younger to me. I am in my early forties. Thanks for the reply and accepting my views. Unlike older days now people are more selfish. This may be due to money oriented life. Very few is in a position to think about others. Specially in the cities. So finding a person who will whole heartedly bless others is extremely difficult if not possible. Thanks for trying at least educate the people on the tradition amidst the busy schedule. Kind Regards CommonSense Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Pranams to your feet AKKA. I had read this story of Buddha when I was a child. never thought seriously about it. It needs people like you to remind us about moral and message from such stories. So you advice me and other friends to keep quiet and never react before sadistic people. But it is very difficult. We are not anywhere near Buddha. I will try my best to participate in discussion as per your advice but my knowledge is nowhere near yours. You have to correct mistakes of your little sister. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Chota Bhai jaggu, You are forgetting your mother. What is wrong in washing her feet and worshiping her ? Anu 17th Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Correction to my just concluded post to Dr. Rakesh. It is typed as "... lots of teachers do not admit their children to different schools ..." please read it as "... lots of teachers admit their children to different schools ..." Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Vani 1 Dear Vani, Ashirvads. I am numbering replies to you so that you can keep track. Let me begin with an incidence from the life of Gautama Buddha. One day when Buddha was sitting under a tree, a person approached him, criticised & scolded him in all possible bad language. The smiling expression on the face of Buddha never changed. At the end, when his detractor got exhausted, Buddha holds a fruit in his hand asks him "My Dear friend, If I give you this fruit and you refuse to take it, with whom will it remain ?" Detractor- "What kind of Buddha are you ? Don't even know this simple thing. The fruit remains with you". Buddha replies "Very well, I have refused all your bad words and I do not take it. With whom will they remain ?" Detractor was shocked. He realised that Buddha had really not taken those bad words as his FACIAL EXPRESSION had never changed. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, Do you share jokes with your HOD or any Professor ? As I understand (heard) there are only practical classes in PG courses of medicine, surgery etc. If there are theory classes, will students stand up when the teacher enters the class room ? or Will you be standing up when your professor comes to your table ? One more question- I am an Engineer as I have already stated (BE in Electronics & Comunication), Can I get admission to your course i.e. MS ? Please introspect and answer (Do not take questions as BOMBORDING) I will answer both Vani & you simultaneously. Your straight forward answers might add lot of value for discussion. It is not for you alone but hundreds of people who may be reading these views (present & future). I will try to explain and make you understand the behavior of Veena teacher. Do you know that lots of teachers do not admit their children to different schools & lots of top industrialists send their children to work in different industries initially to get experience ? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Vani, Ashirvads. May GOD give you all happiness in life. Your question requires maximum number of postings to answer (till date in this forum). May be at least 10 posts. The ideas and concepts referred while answering your questions will be valuble and of higher depth. So, there was a delay. Now that "CommonSense" has raised a point, I thought I would take up yours. I appriciate your patience and attitude. But in between I will be posting replies to others also. But I want your active participation while I answer you. -Anu 15th Feb 2011 Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai vani! i think you are younger to me so please wait!really we are all like students with one teacher ANU!GOD bless you Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Anu Akka Pranams to your feet. Waiting for your Ashrivads. You said you will take up my question next but again answered Rakesh. He has put another question already. I am not forcing you. You can choose the right time for BLESSING your little sister waiting for long. Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: mohanji if i had an opportunity to wash someones feet defenitely it would be anu deedi.her knowledge, simplicity,care and above that her values are the ones we should all respect. if india parenting gives a chance i think everyone would love to touch anu deedis feet.so holy they are! Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: continuing NOW her mom and me are good friends.she shares jokes with me is very informal and i have learnt cooking from her. at the same time with her students there is a huge distance!what nonsense is this anu?my veena learning gone with the wind! Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: continuing I myself wanted to learn veena and asked her mom who is my good friend now.but she told me that our relation would change dramatically and i would have to be very respectful cant talk this way had to touch her feet every time i saw her and couldnt share jokes as of now. even my friend discouraged me.what nonsense is this anu? Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai anu!your approach towards everyone here is just like a sister!thats great!mom of my mbbs classmate takes veena classes at home and i have seen her students respect her! any new student who joins class gives gurudakshna to the teacher and touches her feet(irrespective of age).she has students older to her.on seeing her the students remove footwear and prostrate before her!amazing the kind of respect!she is very strict and teaches students how to worship the guru Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Chota Bhai jaggu, I was busy with works related to our house construction I have mentioned earlier. It was about a week. But instead of waiting for "Anu Deedi" for comments, try contributing something from your end. You can definitely make VALUE additions if you seriously try. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, Please do not consider that I am BOMBARDING you. It is a healthy discussion. Any kind of poking or difference of opinion is always welcome as I stated earlier. India is the country where "ATHIESM" or CHARVAKA SIDDHANTA is born. We have been living together with harmony for thousands of years. Enduring other's belief is a part of our culture. Even knowledge of Mahabharata TV serial is good enough to start with. But our treasure is not present in Mahabharata alone. Ramayana, Kathasaritsagara, Panchatantra, Jataka Tales, UNBELIEVABLY magnificient SIRIBHOOVALAYA, ZEN Literature, Upanishads, Literature from Jain & Buddhist religions.. The list is endless. Most important- the answers addressed to you are not meant just for you but all people who are reading these views and those who would read in future. All the best - Anu 14th Feb 2011 Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: i am not able to post my views completely hence these broken sentences. sorry. Name: Mohan Country: India Comment: Jaggu Would you like to give respect to some one??, would you like to touch/ Wash someone’s feet ?? Share such feelings Dear Rakesh Its ok you are a hybrid. This forum is to share the feel of respect others, Jesus Christ has washed his disciple’s feet to show his intimacy to them. Have u ever done that?? Even to your mom she showed you the life of the great Jesus Christ Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: Anu you seem to be bombarding me with facts and queries! my father is a hinduand mom a catholic)!theirs was a love marriage and hence both were thrown out of family.even after 26 years of their marriage things are only slowly getting back to normal.hence my knowledge about hindu culture has come only from my father who used to be very busy(he is an IAS Officer).my mom is a simple home maker who taught me how to be compassionate with fellow beings.my knowledge about mahabharatha is more or less limited to the tv serial.now i hardly get time to sleep. then how do i find time? after my MS I SHALL TRY my best to keep pace. infact i have great regards and respect for you and i was just trying to poke you sorry for that!im proud to be an indian and im proud that i know you because your knowledge is amazing.i havent touched anyones feet to date and because my mom is a christian we have been kept away from family get togethers! i have no probs.to date i have been a part of many surgical teams that have saved many lives! Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear CommonSense, I have already expressed my view that I agree with "Anon", "not needed to touch feet of undeserving elderly people" in my 2nd posting. I have elaborated the same view in my reply to "mohan". I think the explanation to this will as part of answer to "Vani" pending for a long time. I will do it in my next post. You are correct. In order to get "GENUINE BLESSINGS" there has to be effective "SAMVAHANA" between the people involved in the act of "NAMASKARA" or "PADA VANDANA" or "PADA GRAHANA" at the level of MIND and HEART. This has to be ACHIEVED by both parties' TRUE involvement. -ANU 13th Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Sridhar Babu, If you consider me as an "ENLIGHTENED SOUL" at a young age as lot of people have been doing for more than 5 years, I must HUMBLY once again state that it is due to the "ANUGRAHA" from GURUJI Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, Your post prior to the latest one poses a question to me- my reaction when TWO of my sister's friends meet me, one touches my feet, the other doesn't. But Why would one TOUCH my feet unless there is a pre existing attachment or bonding between us ? As I have already clarified, the difference in the reaction would be a result of pre existing BONDING and not just touching feet. Can I offer BLESSINGS to the one who has not touched the feet (which amounts to CURSING her) ? Can I Keep quiet without blessing the one who touched the feet ? Here "I" may replaced with "anybody". Few more question to you- 1) DO YOU include GRAND PARENTS (both your father's parents & mother's parents) in your eligibility list for receiving namaskara from you ? 2) Similarly can PILS (father-in-law & Mother-in-law) be included ? If NOT will you instruct your wife (when you marry) not to touch your parents' feet ? It is unfortunate that a person of your education and qualification know "VERY LITTLE" about our HISTORICAL EPICS and very highly valuble moral stories about which we are to be proud about. But better late than never. If you make up your mind, you can definitely take some time and read all them NOW. -ANU 13th Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, continuing further, an interesting information is "Hi" was introduced in personalised messages by a leading telecom company and withdrew the same after complaints from consumers. As mohan pointed out earlier, "Hi" and "Hai" are also used for adressing cattle. So it is best if we do not hurt anybody's sentiments. Now answering your Latest question, I am first an INDIAN, then anything else. Let us be proud to call ourselves INDIANS. If you had read all my earlier comments carefully, there was a hint in one comment. I am born in KARNATAKA and living presently in Bangalore. That is only information but once again, I want to be identified as INDIAN and not by any region if it affects the UNITY. -Anu 13th Feb 2011 Name: nu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, I was to continue differentiating between GM and "Hi" Hai" etc. GM entered India during British Raj and well accepted by our society. What is being accepted slowly is something like "Haay" but with limited addressing range (friends of same gender). You can wish your teachers with "GM" not Hi or Hai. Also if you meet anybody of your age group (New person) GM is appropriate and not "Hi" or "Hai". There is a protocol in GM also. If you meet your teacher, you will have to wish FIRST and then your teacher would return GM. With all that GM maintains the same distance between two people. It does not distinguish between closer ones and others. TOUCHING FEET does. When you meet your grandparents after a long time would it be appropriate to wish them GM and expect them to return the same ?? Our traditional gesture of doing NAMASKARA and receiving blessings is quite meaningful and powerful in establishing the strong BONDING. -Anu Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: hai mohan bhayya! i havent touched anyones feet before!im hardly 16 years old!anu deedi where are you? Name: Mohan Country: India Comment: Jaggu you can also open the silence. Tell us what is ur opinion of touching feet? Do u have the habit of touching your parents / siblings feet?? Have you ever washed anyone’s feet?? Don’t expect some one will spoon feed you always. Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: what happened?why evereyone is silent? Name: Sridhar Country: India Comment: Dear Anu You seem to be a very enlightened soul for your young age. It is interesting to read your comments Sridhar Babu Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: dear anu here work is very tough and hence hardly i get time!which state are u from? Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai anu!your knowledge is amazing! i just put up a question thats all! i know very little about all these!i asked because this custom exists with hindus only and if 2 friends of ur sister meet you and if one touches the feet how would it be? elder i mean your parents and teachers only and noome else! im keala only on marriaGE DAY THIS IS DONE! Name: CommonSense Country: India Comment: Dear Anu, Thanks for your views. Whats my argument is being elder does not only qualify to be respected. One of my uncle is so much jealous and bad hearted. What is the meaning of getting his blessing by touching his feet? Isn't that sound ridiculous? If we need to get genuine blessing we need to get it from people who loves and cares of our well being. Even i will say getting the blessing from the wife by touching her feet is best. cos she will be more worried about our welfare next or equal to our mother. In few cases it differs. Please give me a good explanation on my argument Best Regards CommonSense Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, Continuing further, I will now describe a situation and want to know your opinion. Imagine that your father's elder brothers (2 of them) are sitting on a sofa. (I do not know if people of that relation deserve to receive namaskara from you in your existing opinion- You have once mentioned "Its OK with elders" and other time mentioned "parents and teachers and no one else") If it is not you, consider anyone else who is ready to do namaskara to them from your circle. Will the person do namskara to one of the uncles and say "Hai" or "Good morning" to other ? That will not happen unless there is a strong reason behind it. It shows that the BONDING with one who receives namaskara is normal (or GOOD) as expected in our society and the one who receives the greeting as "Hai" or "GM" is strained beyond a reasonable limit that it is being shown in PUBLIC and descriminating behavior so openly. WIll both uncles in such situation react the same way or will it be different ? Similarly in my household (or any household) TWO youngsters' behavior will never be different unless there is a strong reason behind it because both of them are brought up the same way. If their behavior is different, the BONDING with one is strained somewhere and that BASIC history behind BOND straining will obviously reflect in the reaction of the one who receives namaskara and "Hai" or "GM". It is not just namaskara effect. Will continue. getting late to office. Please answer at the earliest to all questions -Anu 1st Feb 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, Let me start narrating an incidence from MAHABHARATA. It was almost certain that war would take place between KAURAVAS and PANDAVAS. Both start seeking help from other kings. Lord KRISHNA came to know that DURYODHANA and ARJUNA have already started and would reach him almost around the same time. He PRETENDS to be sleeping. DURYODHANA arrives first and sits in a throne like seat placed near the head of Lord KRISHNA. Arjuna arrives little later and stands humbly near the feet of LORD. Krishna gets up and says he gives first choice to ARJUNA as he saw him first though DURYODHANA argues that he arrived first. Later LORD offer the choices - entire Yadava army one side and non fighting KRISHNA on other side. It is VERY IMPORTANT to note that even if the first choice was given to DURYODHANA, he would have preferred strong Yadava army and not the non fighting KRISHNA. But the MESSAGE or the IDEA given by LORD is clear about the BASIS on which PRIORITY has be accorded if we understand the whole incidence IN DEPTH at micro level and learn from the same. It is a LESSON for both people who are in place of KRISHNA and people in place of ARJUNA or DURYODHANA. If we have to show and set an example to our youngsters about how they have to be polite and humble (without sacrificing their dignity) for getting priorities and excel in practicle life, we have lead by example (both ways - In place of Krishna and in place of Duryodhana / Arjuna). Answer has just begun. More important part will follow later. In between there will be some questions to you. -Anu Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Dr. Rakesh, You have slightly altered your previous question. The earlier question was open to everybody /anybody from this forum to answer and the one touching feet was from their household. The latest question is addressed to me specifically and the one touching feet is not from our household. Besides the addressing is changed from "GOOD MORNING" to "Hai". Though these two APPEAR to be same, there is lot of difference between them in terms of feelings they generate in people involved. I will take both and differenciate. You have one old question pending "Why can't people of same age be like friends Why do namaskara ?" I guess that what you mean by "SAME AGE" is "SAME AGE GROUP" meaning difference of few years because it is very unlikely that two people are of EXACTLY SAME AGE. There will be difference in terms of days or months atleast among majority of the people in practical life we come across. Please clarify me if I am wrong. Also Please mention the required age difference between two persons NEEDED for TOUCHING FEET in your opinion before I can proceed - Example 5 years - 10 years. Anything which is PROPER in your view. Your latest question requires many posts to answer properly as I am unable to post long ones and I will begin now -Anu 31st Jan2011 Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: dear anu when u see 2 youngsters one of them says hai and the other kneels down and touches your feet will your feelings towards them vary? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Arun, Ashirvads. My happiest moments related to Padapooja are when I do it to my husband, my MIL and my mother. Not when I received the same. And I also enjoyed doing Padapooja of all SUMANGALIS at the time of my marriage and subsequent year during various rituals as I knew that all the Ladies whom I was worshiping have Lots and lots of affection for me. (My MIL, My mother, My MIL's Co-sisters, sister & sisters-in-law, My Mother's co-sister, sister & SIL, My MIL's elder sister's daughters) But When I received the same, except my SIL, Co-SIster & my husband's cousins nobody was closely known to me. I am sure that all these mentioned just now did it whole heartedly. But do not know the feelings of other brides (who belong to my MIL's friend circle) when they did it before knowing me well. Most of them are very close to me subsequently and did the padapooja happily, but do not know their feelings when they did it initially. They say they had heard about me but still I do not know. I definitely never wished to receive the same in such situations but for the insistence from their mothers or MILs. But whenever I received, from whomsoever I received, my heart always wished all the best for them. My SIL, Co-sister and husband's cousins did Padapooja to me with tons of love and affection. I am eagerly waiting to do SUMANGALI Pooja of all elders in our family with my husband and receive their blessings during March or April when the house we are constructing is expected to be finished. Courtesy my MIL's vision and forethought with which she cleverly invested my husband's earnings in a 3000 sft. site in 2003 itself. My son is pulling me. More later -Anu Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu akka pranams to your holy feet. I have discussed her about the preferences I got from the family but she told me that she never minded that as she loved me a lot. this made me to surrender at her feet with whole devotion. She was very happy receiving the padapuja from me. I am sure you also felt happy many times while receiving Padapujas. pls let me know when was the happiest moment in your padpuja experiences. also pls let me know any elder people in age has ever given you padapuja? Male or female Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Arun, Clarifying further about my just concluded post- At the time of thier GRUHAPRAVESHA, My SIL & her husband would worship me as a part SUMANGALI POOJA if I am ONE among the NINE SUMANGALIS choosen for the same. Usually close relatives and friends are choosen for the same. So there are good chances. My MIL and my SIL's MIL will receive the PADA POOJA twice - Once during rituals stated in just concluded post and again during SUMANGALI POOJA. (Both will be definitely choosen). Please share whatever is pleasent to you with all people of this forum. -Anu 27th Jan 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Arun, Correction in my just concluded post- It is typed as .."If all three couple are available, then it would be my husband & myself.." please read it as .."If all three couple are NOT available, then it would be my husband & myself.." The three couple referred are 1. My FIL & MIL 2. FIL's 1st brother & wife 3. FIL's 2nd brother & wife i.e. my SIL's parents or eqivalent. My FIL has 2 brothers and 2 sisters. Had he got more brothers, the preference would go like what I explained in the order of seniority. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Arun, Ashirvads. Good that you have satisfied youself and made your sister happy. But did you discuss what I suggested as more appropriate way of correcting your mistakes (STOPING PREFERENTIAL TREATMENT FOR BOYS within your LIMITS) with your sister ? I am more curious to know her opinion and your (both your sister & you) plans implementing the same. The other days you can select may be RAKSHABANDHAN and your BIRTH DAY. One correction to your just concluded post- My SIL's husband will not be my BIL. He is equal to my brother in relation. SIL's brother is BIL. When my SIL & her husband constuct or buy a house, they still have to worship my SIL's MIL & FIL (husband's parents) and my MIL & FIL (wife's parents). If both my FIL & MIL are not available, then (as happened in their marriage) the couple who are selected for the worship ritual would be either 1. My FIL's 1st younger brother & his wife or 2. My FIl's 2nd younger brother & his wife. If all three couple are available, then it would be my husband & myself. One more important thing I should mention here. After PADA POOJA of 2 couples as mentioned earlier, My MIL alone would be worshipped (if my FIL is absent) on the occasion of Gruhapravesha. Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu akka Pranams to your lotus feet My cousines birthday was on last Sunday. I have given her a padapuja which made her so happy as i saw her eyes sparkling like stars with joy. One of her friend was also witnessed the whole act which made her more happy. I felt so good as this as i showed my intimacy at its level best. still I am in thrill and waiting for the next occasion.. Do suggest on which all occasions I can give her a padapuja like this. Will share you the whole thing if you want. Also pls let me know will your Bil to whom you performed kanyadhan will wash your feet if he do a grahapravesh. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Chota Bhai jaggu, I think the answers to all your questions are already posted. I went thro' entire postings once again. Please read all postings addressed to others also. If there is still anything pending, please let me know. I am unable to post my long comments. How do I post pictures and videos ? One of my failed comment with reference to video has been sent to Indiaparenting team long back and I am awaiting their response. This is a HUGE website. May be they are busy with other emergencies. Dear TREESA Madam, I am curious to know the about the occations during which washing feet is done in your circle or community or region. -Anu Name: treesa Country: India Comment: thanks anu.i shall try! Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: namaste anu deedi! why no response?just funok! Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear TREESA Madam, I am also curious to know the PROGRESS in your son's attitude Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear TREESA MADAM, As I have already mentioned, I was unable to post my reply to you. Information about washing feet contained in that reply has been repeated to a maximum extent in my subsequent posts to Arun. My siblings (younger brother aged 14 and younger sister aged 17) have been touching my feet after POOJA on a daily basis (when I was available in my parental home), and on occasions like their birthdays, festivals, before leaving for exams, before leaving home on a long journey (me or them) as per the practice in our family. They also touch the feet of my PILS, husband, BIL, SIL, CO-sister whenever the situation as mentioned above arises depending on the availability. My husband, BIL, SIL, Co-Sister touch my parents' feet similarly. Nobody compells anybody. We have been brought up like that. It definitely improves the BONDING between us. As I have mentioned earlier, the occasions for my siblings to wash my feet as per pracices in our family have not arisen so far. My sister will wash my feet at the time of her marriage related ceremonies) during SUMANGALI POOJA (may be sevral times). My brother would do it when he constructs a house. My son will have to worship me during his UPANAYANAM. Compelling anybody to touch the feet or wash the feet may not yield real results. In my opinion, find out why your son does not like it. Take him into confidence and find out more information about his classmates and friend circle. Change his circle if necessary. Make him realize that mother is the first GOD to everybody. GIve him value education about our culture. It would be better if the message about washing your feet is conveyed to him by your husband or Parents-in-law rather than you yourself telling him. Adopt the principles of TRUTH & NON VIOLENCE of Mahatma Gandhi - Truth Leading by example, showing him examples like your husband washing your MIL's feet. NON VIOLENCE is not compelling him. (GURUJI has explained me how these principles can be adapted to various situations). I am curious to know the occations in which WASHING feet is done in your circle, community or region. All the best. Name: treesa Country: India Comment: dear anu still the answer to my question is missing! should we insist our small children to touch or wash our feet?do you expect toyoungsters in your family to do it when they meet you? Name: Pallavi Country: India Comment: Can anybody help me Where can I find the RULES and REGULATIONS of this site Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Chota Bhai Arun, Lots of Ashirvads. There is nobody in the world who has never committed a mistake. Realizing the mistake and correcting the same is important. My heart felt appreciations to both you for realizing your mistake at such young age and same heart felt appreciations to your sister who had the broad mind to FORGIVE at that young age. She is a classic example for "KSHAMAYA DHARITRI". Also it requires COURAGE to accept your OWN mistakes. One very good example for this is from the life of Jesus Christ- People were ready to stone a woman to death and Jesus asks that the first stone be thrown by anybody who has never committed a mistake in life. Then the entire crowd dispersed. Anything that comes out your concise is always good. So washing her feet is okay whenever you feel like. For such acts coming out of your heart, you do not require any traditional approval or appropriate time. Whatever be your judgement would be OK. I would have gladly accepted it if I were in your sister's place because it is your RIGHT. At the same time do not forget your mother. But the more appropriate way of correcting your mistakes is by STOPPING PREFERENTIAL TREATMENT to boys within your limits beacuse that is the evil which made to commit mistakes. That would be your best way of correction (Ask if your sister agrees to this point of view). For this do not FIGHT with any family members but take them into confidence. ADVOCATE against the bad practices as the ones narrated by VARALAXMI. -I will suggest methods for this later. Putting it the other way, the most appropriate way of respecting GANDHIJI of Gautama Buddha is to follow their principles than worshiping them. (I am not suggesting to DROP worship but DO NOT DROP PRINCIPLES). If you are still a student, all the best for your exams and convey my best wishes to your sister for her exams if she is still a student. Name: arun Country: India Comment: Dera Anu akka lots of pranams to your holy feet Before telling you the urgency need to tell you about me lil more. I am the only son for my home and I have one cousin she is 9 month elder to me. In my childhood I never used to call her Akka as she is only 9 months elder and also because of my ego. Since I was boy I was getting more priority in our family. That days I used to take advantages from her in many ways also used to fight with her etc. always both parents where on my side and she used to get penalized for my mistakes. In school she was one class senior to me. She was a kind person she always helped me for many thing including my studies. When we turned to high school days I realized that she take care of me like a mother and I am not behaving properly too her. On one rakshabandhan day I saw one brother touches Her Sisters feet and she blesses her. I felt so guilty behaving in a rude manner earlier. I went to her and touched her feet and told her to forgive me for my earlier misbehaviors. She touched my head and told she never felt anything bad on me any time. After that she was my guardian and guru for all my things I used to touch her feet all the day. I felt her advices and influences made my life very lovable. Later I joined for my engineering graduation in a different city and whenever come I used to pay lots of respect to her in many ways I learned from books or films or internet. After joining this forum I felt that washing feet and drinking that water will be the best way of showing my deep respect to her. Next week her birthday is coming and I thought that will be the best time for me to do so. Akka pls advice me on this. Pls let me know if its you on my cousins place will you love this treat ?. also pls advice the best time to do so. Arun Name: Anu Country: India Comment: But whenever husband is worshipped, it is usually expected that the the water is fully consumed. I am unable to list 5 situations when it is done as I am getting continuous message not allowing the same. The same was listed in my reply to TREESA MADAM. But India Parenting team have replied that they were able to post it from their side. They may be posting the same at the earliest on my behalf. Now my experiences - I have washed feet of SUMANGALIS as needed by rituals. My feet are also washed (more than 100 times) whenever I was made to sit for SUMANGALI POOJA after my marriage. But the water is not consumed. I have consumed after washing my husband's feet - 2 times few drops as his feet were placed on a plantain leaf and more quantity all other times. May I know what was the URGENCY to get this information ? I can also share the experiences of my friends from NORTH India, Kerala & Tamil Nadu. but preferably once the technical issue is fixed as it would waste a lot of time for typing the message & unable to post the same. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Continuing further- In all worship situations mentioned earlier washing feet is done. Drinking water is not done except in UPANAYANAM. It may be just symbolic drinking of few drops. But the person washing the feet sprinkles the water over his / her head. In SUMANGALI POOJA, feet are almost wiped rather than washed as feet are placed on floor. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Continuing again - 3) Bride worships 5 or 9 (rarely more also) SUMANGALIS during various rituals related to marriage. 4) Newly wedded bride worships SUMANGALIS during various festivals in the first year after marriage. Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear jaggu, what a minute observation!!! but please read all posts of anu bhabhiji. she has clearly mentioned in one of her previous posts that BLESSING somebody before he or she does namskara amounts to CURSING them. INDRA does the same thing to KARNA in MAHABHARATA. not blessing somebody on receiving namskara is also SIN as mentioned in same post. she is perfectly right. Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: anu deedi u addressed me dear jaggu and gave ashirvads to arun! is it because i never said pranams at your lotus feet? Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: if a younger boy/girl in your household just says gud morning and another kneels down and touches your feet will your attitude towards the two vary? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Continuing with previous post- Now a few situations of WORSHIP- India is vast country and practices vary from region to region, community (caste) to community and even family to family. Hence I am listing whatever I have come across and in practice in our region. 1) Boys worship their mother at the time of UPANAYANAM. 2a) Couple (husband & wife) worship husband's parents and wife's parents at the time of GRUHAPRAVESHAM (House Warming) 2b) They also worship 5 or 9 SUMANGALIS during House warming. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Chota Bhai Arun, Ashirwads. Since you are mentioning URGENCY, I will try once again. But let me cut my reply into 2 or 3 parts. First washing feet- This is done 1) when person is standing on a flat stone or 2) by placing the the feet on plantain (Banana) leaf of 3) by placing the feet on a wooden plank (It is called MANE in Kannada) or 4) by placing the feet in a plate (silver or steel) or 5) when person is sitting on a mat or wooden plank with feet streched forward. All washing feet need not be a PART of WORSHIP. During KANYADAN, bride's father washes groom's feet placed in a silver plate - but this is not WORSHIP- It is just washing. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Chota Bhai jaggu, It is a practice in my home and parental home that POOJA is done (after taking bath) by everybody separately. It may be 1 hour long with lot of STOTRAS or just a minute or two lighting a lamp depending on how busy the person is. My FIL always does it beyond 30 minutes. He gets up very very early in the morning (some times at 4:00 AM) and makes sure POOJA is done to his satisfaction. It is our usual practice to touch feet of elders available at home after POOJA. I touch my FIL, MIL & husband's feet after my POOJA is over. But most of the time my FIL and husband are not available as they would have left home much earlier. But you can follow whatever is being followed at your home, first time after seeing in the morning or after POOJA or while going out for OFFICE- anything is OK. I agree with you it is not always possible to KNEEL DOWN. For example in our marriage we had to touch feet of approximately 500 people. Then bending is OK. Another situation - about 50 to 60 students touch the feet of a teacher after SARASWATI POOJA. Practically it takes lot of time if everyone kneels down. Extreme urgency is another situation. Find out what is suitable according to situation. But do it with BOTH hands. -ANU Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear tarun, I have never been into teaching profession. Dear subha, I guess your SIL is your elder brother's wife. You can touch her feet whenever you touch your mother's feet as per the practice at your home. Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: anu deedi namaste!please post namaskara videos none of us know the right technique thats why!please tell me when should we do it at what time?you have talked a lot about in laws but what about your own siblings? do they touch your feet? has anyone washed your feet? Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Anu akka lots of pranams to your holy feet. I want to know about washing feet / drinking that water, due to some urgency. pls help me with few words. Also pls let me know if you have such experiences like someone washed your feet and drank that water. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Now situation in which my SIL's husband touched my feet- My FIL is a DOCTOR (Senior Surgeon) and always busy. He had to be a part of some important MAJOR Surgeries around the time of my SIL's marriage. Hence his continuous avialability was not possible in the marriage. HIs presence is very essential to have him & my MIL right from 2 to 3 days prior to marriage for various rituals of marriage. He has 2 younger brothers and they were also not available with their wives during the ENTIRE PERIOD involving all rituals. So my husband and myself had to do the KANYADAN and participate in the place of my FIL and MIL. During various rituals the bride and the groom have to touch our feet. When I was hesitating (Trying to Stop him in middle) my SIL's MIL convinced me that I was in the position of BRIDE'S Mother and hence her son has to receive my blessings. In several subsequent rituals and during our visit to my SIL's new home also she told me that her son has to always take the blessings of those who gave him his better half -Anu 14th Jan 2011 Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Little brother Arun, My reply to TREESA MADAM contains Washing feet details. I will continue the same once India Parenting Team posts it on my behalf. I have sent it to them long back. Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Akka Pls few words on Washing feet / Drinking that water, Situation in which your SIL's husband had to touch your feet pls Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Reema, Ashirvads. May GOD give you all happiness in life. Many happy returns of the day 13th Jan or 14th Jan. Short answers to your previous questions- My daily routine is disturbed a lot after my son's birth. He is 3 years old. I am working as a software engineer. Except my working at office, remaining time at home is really disturbed. It might gradually come to normal as my son gets older. AJITH I read a LOT. Right from Children stories to fictions to material related to Adhyatma to ... everything or anything that is interesting or suggested by my MIL as GOOD. Now a days after my son's birth it is about 10 to 15 hours per week. Earlier it was more. Name: reema Country: India Comment: anu bhabhiji please accept my namaskaras at your lotus feet!today being my birthday i touched the feet of all elders!in my mind i kneel down and touch your feet! Name: reema Country: India Comment: anu bhabhiji please accept my namaskaras at your lotus feet!today being my birthday i touched the feet of all elders!in my mind i kneel down and touch your feet! Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Ramesh I belive everyone is waiting for our respected teacher Anu akka's reply. Respected anu Akka pranams to your lotus feet pls reply in short if you are not able to post big ones Name: ramesh Country: India Comment: why everyone has suddenly gune silent? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: I am unable to post my detailed reply probably due to some technical issue. I have failed in posting my REPLY to TREESA MADAM onwards (upto sreelekha) several times and the same is reported to India Parenting Team. India Parenting Team informed me that they would post the comments on my behalf. I am waiting for the same to happen. Please do not mistake me. I have been trying to reply everybody sincerely for the past 10 to 12 days. Name: arun Country: India Comment: Anu Akkaa Pranams to your lotus fet Waiting for you valubale replys Name: Na Country: India Comment: Indian Customs and traditions are very good, I like the costume of touching feet. Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear rakesh, hi, hai etc are not from our culture. we address cattle that way. i do not endorse blindly copying everything from west. but one thing you initially addressed anu as respected anu and all of a sudden it became hai anu why ? pranams are done in our culture to not only elders but also teachers. i considered anu as my teacher and more as bhabhi as many more have done. please read my question to anu, her reply and again my reply for the same carefully. you will understand Name: reema Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhiji thanks! u seem to be busy always? are u working? Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai anu! im not the same rakesh who stopped his wife doing namaskara!im not married even!im from cochin (kerala)a doctor by profession doing MS in surgery!here we do namaskara only rarely on auspicios days! in laws are just like friends!mohan why should you give pranams at the the feet of anu?she herself has said she is 26 yrs old and i understand u r about the same age. why cant u say hai? Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: hai anu!gud words!please explain why cant peole of same age be frnds?why do namaskara? Name: VARALAXMI Country: India Comment: Anu AKKA, Do you endorse girl falling to feet at the time of BRIDE TESTING or VADHU PARIKSA that is when boys side come to see the girl? Do you agree with THIS TRADITION ? My Elder Sister feels humiliated about falling to feet of all unwanted people and weeps silently in front of me only after everybody has left. She has already more than a DOZEN such unplesent experiences and GOD knows how many more. Why should girl fall to their feet when they are not going to accept her and finalize the alliance ? What are your experiences ? Our mother says we have to endure with all as we have much more to follow in marriage and after marriage at IN-LAWS house. Also prior to or during or after marriage when bride is introduced to all people from boy's side SHE HAS TO FALL TO THEIR FEET but boy will only smile or say HELLO (at the most NAMASTE with folded hands) when he in introduced to people from girls side. WHY ? WHY ? Name: mohan Country: India Comment: one more thing anu bhabhiji. please call me mohan. i think i have the right to demand you not to suffix "ji" Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhiji, pranams to your feet. Thanks a lot, i had never thought that way and your advice made me introspect. my bhabhi is a living example to show "bhabhi maa saman hoti hai". she had earlier resigned her job for taking care of our family at one juncture. all these days it never struk me. i had shown this article and views to my wife prior to posting my comments. she had told me "i will go with whatever anu didi says". now both of us have a different feeling of attachment when we touch my bhabhi's feet. without my knowledge i started calling her bhabhiMA instead of bhabhi and i can see the glow on her face about that. my wife has conveyed her pranams to you and your mil. Pranams Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, Pranams to all elders & Ashirvads to those who sought. Dear Reema (Views posted immediately after Vineeta Malaysia), (I find 3 different Reema here-One expressing view in the very beginning, 2nd immediately after Vineeta Malaysia addressing me AKKA, 3rd addressing me BHABHI) I suggest that next time when you touch your parents' feet, complete the act with total involvement. I have a feeling that you would enjoy the same and their BLESSINGS will definitely do good to you. Try to win your MIL's heart -not just by pleasing her thro' touching her feet as per her expectations but by all other actions and behavior in daily routine. I will narrate my other experiences with my MIL as requested by others soon. That might help improve MIL-DIL relation. Little brother Arun- My SIL's husband has touched my feet (though I was not comfortable but on his mother's reasoning & insistence, I had to whole heartedly accept it) several times. Regular touching is not there as we do not stay together (My SIL has moved to her husband's house after her marriage). Washing feet / Drinking that water, Situation in which my SIL's husband had to touch my feet, will appear in detail later. Little Sikha All the best to all of you in your career. TREESA MADAM, Please call me by name. I will take up your question next-Probably today itself. --Anu Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, Pranams to all elders & Ashirvads to those who sought. Mohan Devarji, For a moment forget your Bhabhi's age. Just analyze if you (and your wife) consider her worthy enough for touching feet. If she deserves the same by her action, behavior and discharging her duties with selflessness and complete responsibility as an elderly DIL of your family, have no hesitation in touching her feet. In that scenario, both your wife & yourself have a RIGHT on her blessings. On the other hand if the respect is NOT COMMANDED but demanded instead (either by her or your mother), and in your careful consideration she is totally unfit and undeserving, then even if she is elder to both of you in age, take your mother into confidence with appropriate reasoning before stopping namskaras to her feet. As you mentioned EIR concept will follow in detail later. In fact I should finish answering whenever it is possible to do so in short and post details later. Respected Rakesh, Why should I get angry with you ? If you are the same Rakesh who has posted view earlier - that you tactfully made your wife stop touching your feet etc. I have to appreciate you for 2 reasons. 1) You are a straight forward person and DO NOT HAVE DOUBLE STANDARDS. you believe in something and adhering to that. 2) You are endorsing our tradition by agreeing fully to touch parents' and teachers' feet. You only have a difference of opinion ON age DIFFERENCE ASPECT for FEET TOUCHING. So Why should anybody get angry with you ? BUT I HAVE A DIFFERENT OPINION. I will post the same in detail later. OPINIONS keep changing also (LIke my opinion changing after marriage). ALL DIFFERENCES of opinion are WELCOME. --ANU 28th DEc 2010 Name: Vani Country: India Comment: Anu Akka Pranams to your feet. I am a 19 year old degree student. One of dearest things to me is to touch my mother's feet and get blessings. I do it whenever I feel like. My father works abroad and whenever he is here I touch his feet also. I clearly feel positive energy passing through me when I touch my parents' feet. But I feel ackward in situations of forsibly touching feet of undeserving people. We discuss a lot about this in our friend circle. About ten days back One of Seniors cried very badly recollecting her forced bowing down, kneeling down etc. during her engagement. But some girls in our group take sadistic pleasure by making fun of such helpless girls. I have two questions: 1) Is it not embarassing to do in PUBLIC to mil, husband, undeserving guests and relatives etc. ? 2) What exactly does namaskara or touching feet signify ? submission and subservience, surrender, love & affection, respect, expressing thanks, formality, confidence boosting with blessings, fun, seeking blessings, Please answer and also advice how I can avoid crying like my friend. Pranams Name: sreelekha Country: India Comment: discussion is getting onto top gear!all d best to everyone. Name: sreelekha Country: India Comment: discussion is getting onto top gear!all d best to everyone. Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: i just cant follow elder in relation concept!you got to have care consideration and respect at the back of your mind. but kneeling in front of peopleof same age is unbelievable.show respect to parents and teachers by touching feet but not to anyone else! Name: mohan Country: India Comment: dear anu bhabhiji, pranams to your feet. I have been following this thread since several days and eagerly wait along with my collegue to read anything new. your knowledge is amazing. eager to know your other experiences with your mil bcoz i know it is just not very easy for dils to see mil as godess that too from a person of your knowledge. -please convey my pranams to your mil. now i have simple problem- i have been touching my sil (bhabhi)'s feet at the instance of my mother right from the day we accepted her into our family fold. She is younger to me in age. in the starting she was not comfartable. but i obey my mother. i got married 3 months back. my wife has been touchng my bhabhi's feet with full respect. but recently after coming to know that she is elder to bhabhi by a week -7 days, she has started feeling discomfartable. so i request u to write about EIR (elder in relation) concept. i know the que is long. you have to answer lot of people before me. but request you to tell me just one sentence asap - me and my wife touching bhabhi's feet correct or wrong. only one sentence. later EIR in detail. Pranams Name: rakesh Country: India Comment: respected ANU after all why is namaskara done?to show respect ok!then why should ur sil and bil Who are of ur same age be respecting you? you should be like friends!its ok with elders but never with people of same age!it creates a barrier.you yourself had said dat it has to come from d mind and im sure that for ur sil who was ur classmate its not possible to change relations overnight.so its done bcoz its a custom and nothing more!dont get angry i just wanted to share my views dats all! Name: AJITH Country: India Comment: anu sis one simple question what do u read? how many hours a day? Name: reema Country: India Comment: ANU bhabhi pls share with us your daily routine?how you go about a normal day? Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, Pranams to all elders & Ashirvads to those who sought. I am really moved by the kind of response. I once again humbly state that the roots what knowledge I have shared so far is just the TIP of ICEBERG I got from that 3 hour interaction I mentioned earlier. I will start answering one by one. If any require more time, I will post later in detail. The 1st one is Vineeta Malayasia- Few Basics about touching feet or Namaskara- When somebody does the namaskara, sometimes it may be just for formality or in a group just because others are doing it etc. The person doing may not be really doing it with his/ her heart & soul's involvement. In such situations stopping them in the middle is OK (If you let them continue, they may not complete it in true sense). But if the person doing it is related to you (like relative/ student or thro' a strong reference etc.), he /she has a RIGHT to receive your BLESSINGS and it will be a SIN to stop them in the middle. Blessing before anybody does the namaskara is like CURSING them (This was done to KARNA by INDRA when he came in the guice of a bramhin to take away his Kavacha & Kundala in Mahabharata). Not blessing when you receive a namaskara is also SIN and it would not affect the one who did the namaskara but the one who received it. Also doing a Namaskara if it makes person who is supposed to receive it to get into a dilemma / dual mind to bless you (not intends to bless you but aware that blessing HAS to be DONE) is wrong- Example for this is Mahabharata again- Krishna declares that he will not put Gandhari to such dilemma after she curses that all Yadavas would perish fighting among themselves. It is a practice in India (to touch dance teacher's feet once before & once at the end of class thro' dancing gesture itself. I have seen it in Bharatanatyam. Other forms of classical dance I am not aware of. But guess that it exists in other forms also as respecting teachers is a part of our tradition. Exact posture KNEELING / NOT KNEELING etc. in my next post. Bye --Anu Name: ram Country: India Comment: jaggu lazy fellow!nothing will happen to your knee joint by kneeling!instead you get lots of blessings! Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: ANU deedi please post namaskara videos!at what time do your bil sil and younger ones touch your feet?early morning when they see u first or after pooja?is it possible to kneel down everytime and do it?respect is in d mind ISNT IT DEEDI?SHOULD WE KNEEL DOWN EVERYTIME? Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet. ur asumption about what v meen by luv mariage is right. 2 marry the loved one traditionally in presence of every body with BLESSINGS from elders of both families. PRANAMS Name: Anu Country: India Comment: One correction to one of my previous posts-- Posted:.. It is best classified among Bramha or Deva because you ... It should have been ...It is best classified among Bramha because you ... Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear GURUJI, PRANAMS to your feet. I have got much more in life (-infact LOTS & LOTS more) than what I have got so far from this forum exclusively due to that interaction I had with you for 3 hours. Being in the state of extreme happiness over the precious & rare knowledge I gained from the interaction & Of course due to immaturity I had at that time, I did not seek your blessings over the phone. I stupidly mentioned THANK YOU VERY VERY much. We have been brought up this way (and it is continuing till date). We have so far failed to teach our children when to express thanks & when to seek blessings (What I mean be WE is a larger community of Indians I have come across). Please forgive me for the same the way parents forgive the innocent baby and through some light on how we can make our little children understand and differentiate from their very small age. Both of us (my husband and myself) do not know how to contact you. My husband has been telling that your students used to consider each word from you as a blessing and I find solace in that. If you read this please express your blessings to me and if possible answer the questions raised here because you can do it much better. PRANAMS --Anu Name: sreelekha Country: India Comment: i request all girls to read ANUs experiences and be proud of our culture! let us try to imbibe this into our lives!god bless ANU and her family Name: ram Country: India Comment: all of a sudden anu akka has become a superstar!all of us are mentally your students now! Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet (thanx to arun for this new sentence) We are extremly PROUD that we were FIRST to write 2 u in this forum. it is such a SPECIAL FANTASTIC feeling that v were first 2 receive ur ASHIRVADS here. 2 day v celebrated same by distributing sweets to our frnds. if u answer everybody, most of our douts wil clear. But v wil keep in touch once exms over. PRANAMS frm all of us Name: ramesh Country: India Comment: anu is the real star! hats off sis!indians be proud!unfortunately we are unaware of our traditions.people like anu need to come forward and share their experiences with young kids! Name: jaggu Country: India Comment: anu deedi please tell all your younger sisters to take a leaf out of your book!please post a few videos of namaskara! Name: malavika Country: India Comment: anu your knowledge is amazing! we are allyour fans. considering mil as goddesss speaks volumes for your charecter.god bless Name: AJITH Country: India Comment: ANU BHABHI lots of pranams from this young brother!everyone here in chennai would love to have an elder sister like you!all our prayers!pleasre post namaskara videos if possible! Name: gaurav Country: India Comment: ANUreally proud of you daughter! im a retired professor in hindi and iam amazed by how you value our heritage!all girls of today have many lessons to learn from you!you shouldnt waste your time instead teach the younger generation about our culture and how and why to respect elders. may god bless you! Name: gaurav Country: India Comment: really proud of you daughter! im a retired professor in hindi and iam amazed by how you value our heritage!all girls of today have many lessons to learn from you!you shouldnt waste your time instead teach the younger generation about our culture and how and why to respect elders. may god bless you! Name: Priya Country: U.S.A. Comment: Anu, Congratulations on keeping up the Hindu Traditions in your family. I hope you could post a photo or videos of your daily namaskaram sessions so that we can learn. Being born and brought up in the States has made some of us lose touch with the customary things. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Typing error in previous post: Posted: My hearty thanks to all of you for considering me your fan. It should have been My hearty thanks to all of you for considering me FIT enough and being my fans. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear All, I am still unable to post the portion of the comments which I failed to post earlier though Indiaparenting team have successfully done it and informed me. But I feel that very relevant information that needs to be mentioned here is I am 26 years 10 months old (Many of you may be elder to me). My hearty thanks to all of you for considering me your fan. I will sincerely answer all questions to the best of my ability. BUT most important thing I should mention before I proceed is that I OWE a LOT to my husband's teacher's teacher's teacher for all IDEAS, ANALYSIS, VIEWS (& PRESENTING the VIEWS). I had the luck of accidentally speaking to him over telephone for about 3 hours. The speach was initially intended to clarify some of my complex technical doubts of final year engineering which most of the people suggested me to MUGUP or ignore. Even my husband (Not married at that time) told me that, citing that he is totally out of touch with syllabus, exams, solving problems which would appear in question papers etc though he is from the same branch of engineering and he is totally focussing on practical issues that would come up in his JOB. He told me that only his teacher's teacher's teacher would probably satisfactorily clear my doubts. But he had no knowledge of his address or contact number. I asked if we can meet him in the the college where he was teaching at the moment. "He is not teaching any more. He is around 40 and left teaching profession about 10 years back and into industry now" was the answer (As on Date he should be around 45 years old). I thought he was joking and told him thw same. But my would be husband insisted that what he is telling was true, there was a huge fan club for him and he can clarify doubts on other fields of life also like history, politics, traditions, freedom movement, Adhyatma etc. etc. "I dont believe" I said. At the same moment he received a call on his cell and asked the person on the other end if he has any idea of contacting GURUJI. At the end of the call (I could not hear the other side), he told me that if we have luck we can reach a place which was just 5 minutes away from the spot where we were standing and GURUJI was talking to somebody on landline but the line should not be disconnected by then. "Hurry UP" he said, literally dragged me. We rushed to the spot. Little did I know then how precious it was. Line was not disconnected. My would be requested the person that we want to talk to GURUJI. After 2 minutes, my husband introduced himself and asked if GURUJI had time clarify some doubts of his friend (me). After getting his nod phone was handed over to me. Amazing, Wonderful, Unbelievable experience --Not possible to describe in words. The clarity with which he cleared my doubts so quickly, the examples he used to give from among any of common things around us, the way of explaining over phone itself stunned me. In a very short time I could feel the confidence and depth of understanding I had about the concepts which were complex and eaten my head for more than a week (and none of my teachers in college were able to clarify). I thanked him and asked if I could clarify some doubts about our epics, traditions etc. Rest was LIFE TIME memorable experience (beyond words to be honest). He had no cell number then ! It was he who had made the call. Once again I want to very very hubly express my gratitude to him for all the IDEAS, ANALYSIS and VIEWS. He not only made me understand the things but also taught me the way to analyse, build ideas and form views in future on different topics, how, where and what all to read / study etc. At the end I told my would be that I had never understood what he meant earlier and thanked him for the AMAZING experience he provided for that afternoon. Lunch was skipped and I had no knowledge of that. More about this would come into light in future posts. My sincere feeling is that GURUJI should be remembered with respect for all credits. Bye for now ANU Name: ram Country: India Comment: ANU BHABHI KI JAY ! AMAZING YOUR KNOWLEDGE! Name: subha Country: India Comment: anu akka your views are great! youhave big fan following among us!i have started touching feet of elders!i have a sister in law as well!if i have to touch her feet when is it ideal? early morning or? Name: tarun Country: India Comment: anu bhabhi ur knowledge about our culture is amazing!do you teach? Name: TREESA Country: India Comment: ANU MADAM DO any of your yonger siblings wash your feet? im 32 years old!hope i can call you name!should we insist our children to do this?my 7 year old son doesnt like this!should i compell him? Name: sikha Country: India Comment: Pranams at your lotus feet ANU BHABHI! WE are a group of degree students from kerala!we are all your fans now!how you uphold our tradition is superb! Name: sikha Country: India Comment: Pranams at your lotus feet ANU BHABHI! WE are a group of degree students from kerala!we are all your fans now!how you uphold our tradition is superb! Name: arun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu Akka lots of pranams to your lotus feet, its very interesting to read your experiences. Have your SIL' Husband has the habit of touching your feet ?? also pls let me know the custom of washing feet and drinking that water if you have similar experiences on the same. Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear RAM1111 Little sisters, Many Ashirwads. Continuing with my previous post, my CO-SISTER had a similar experience when she entered our house except -- 1. Her mother had not come with her-So she touched my FIL's feet first. 2. I told all younger cousins of my husband to touch her feet and made her realize to accept the same and bless them (my MIL assigned this to me). Though I was ready for NAIL HITTING, my MIL told me that it was her JOB & my turn would come when my DIL enters the house. Now your 2nd question-- we have Lots of famous Love marriages endorsed & glorified in our Tradition for eg. Shakuntala & Dushyanta, Damayanti & Nala, Rukmini & LORD Krishna, Subhadra & Arjuna (with full support of LORD Krishna), Shashirekha & Abhimanyu (again with full support of LORD Krishna) etc. One more famous LOVE marriage was that of Samyukya & Prithviraj Chauhan (form history rather than epics). I ASSUME that What you mean by love marriage is to marry the one you have loved traditionally in presence of every body with BLESSINGS from elders of both families. Please let me know if my assumption is wrong. Our traditions recognize 8 types of marriages 1. Bramha, 2. Deva (Daiva), 3. Prajapatya, 4. Arsha, 5. Gandharva, 6. Asura, 7. Rakshasa, 8. Paishacha. Of these the last three are categorized as BAD. What you people mean by LOVE marriage (and most of us-Indians) is not even GANDHARVA. It is best classified among Bramha or Deva because you don't intend to marry secretly (like Shakuntala & Dushyanta) to categorize it as GANDHARVA. Your concept of love marriage is something like SWAYAMVARA (not exactly SWAYAMVARA of course) wherein you have the total liberty to select your husband. Swayamvara was the right of all Kshatriya Kanyas in the past. Only difference between Old Swayamvara & modern LOVE marriage is --In Swayamvara choice was to be made from a group selected by parents (or only father) and modern love marriages mean selection from a pool which may not be eligible for participating in Swayamvara. It is more important & relevant to understand the consequences of VENTURING into such self selections rather than digging to find if it is in accordance with our Traditions. Oh ! I have to attend to my son who has just got up. More later. Ashirvads --ANU AKKA Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear RAM1111 Little sisters, Many Ashirwads and all the BEST for your exams. 1. This space is too small to narrate my entire pleasant experience (Lots & Lots of Instances) with my MIL. I will narrate one for the time being (and the rest in due course) which will also cover question of Arun and partly cover Vineeta's (Malaysia) question. Now the actual experience goes like this. After the marriage I had to enter my new house (HUSBAND's) for the first time. My mother & her sister had accompanied me. (Usually somebody accompanies, stays for 2-3 days till new bride adjusts to in-laws place) I had instructions from my parents (Most from mother) about how to conduct myself. Of course I had myself witnessed some such ceremonious entering of newly wedded bride into In Laws'/husband's house in our community and had clear idea of what all is expected. As My husband & myself were about to enter the GATE, there were Huge Pictures (Photos with Frames) of LORD Ganesh & our KULADEVATA. Both of us Knelt and did namaskara and proceeded towards DOOR. Here there are three rituals to be done First one is to pour water on our feet, Second one is NAIL HITTING-- I will explain this- to begin with my husband has to places his left foot on the HOSTILU (WOODEN DOOR FRAME on Ground), then I have to place my right foot on top of his left foot in such a way that the GAP between the BIG Toe & next one (Foot ring Toe of married women) of his foot and my foot coincide. Then a small nail is placed in the said GAP, my husband withdraws his foot, my foot rests on Hostilu and the nail is hammered into HOSTILU (I have to withdraw foot after one or two symbolic taps on nail) completely. Same is repeated with me placing right foot first, my husband's left foot on my foot... But again he withdraws first. Third is making ARATI to both of us by FIVE / NINE SUMANGALIS. (Now a days many skip the first TWO). The first TWO may be done by any daughter-in-law of the family who is a SUMANGALI. There is a tendency among elders to assign these to youngest DIL of the family as this would make her hand to come in contact of newly wedded bride's FEET. BUT most appropriate person to do these is MIL (if she is a SUMANGALI). My MIL did these with pleasure though her youngest CO SISTER was already ready thinking that it would come to her. After Arati, BOTH my husband & myself touched the feet of NINE SUMANGALIS who participated in ARATI as per my MIL's instructions (Many husbands now a days skip this & only bride has to touch the feet). I kicked the container of Rice etc. and entered the house..Then my MIL took me to Pooja room. I made a namakara before all the GOD/ GODESS idols & Photos. Now it was my turn to touch all elder's feet and take the blessings in the order of seniority (First one is most important). I had a confusion-- Is it my FIL or my MIL's elder sister's husband ? I whispered to my MIL. She smiled, told me to follow her, held my hand and quietly led me to my MOTHER !!! GREAT SHOK to me & my mother. Told me that I was really lucky that my mother is present on that occasion and anyone else in the world is only after mother. So I started my life inside my new house with my mother's Joyful /Tearful BLESSINGS. Then I finished kneeling & touching all elder's feet (17 including my aunt-mother's sister) I was eagerly looking for my SIL (elder to me by 4 months) but she was not to be seen. My MIL made me sit on chair and told all younsters to introduce themselves to their new BHABHI / AKKA and touch the feet. Unbelievable Unexpected SHOCK. I was not prepared for this. Extreme uneasy situation. I tried to stand, but my MIL made me sit. 14 of my husband's cousins in their teenage knelt before me with full respect and touched their forehead to my feet and introduced themselves while touching my feet with hand and touching hand to their eyes in knelt position several times. I did try to stop first girl but she insisted. My MIL told me that it was my duty to accept their namaskara, bless them and sincerely wish them, sacrifice for them, advice them, scold them etc. and take resposibility like their mother. Then my SIL & BIL (husband's younger sister & younger brother) arrived. I suddenly stood up for touching my SIL's feet (she was my class mate, room mate and the one who acted as bridge between my husband & me during our love). But before I could realize, she was kneeling before me. I resisted --You are elder to me. My MIL said "That was past, Now YOU are elder to her in relation" Bless her. I still resisted "She is elder". My MIL looked at my mother. My mother replied that I was not aware of ELDER IN RELATION concept and told me to obey my MIL. Then my BIL placed his forehead on my feet (He is elder to me by about 2 years). My MIL explained this concept of ELDER in RELATION next day after all relatives had left. Both my SIL & BIL were told not to address me by name but call me BHABHI & also address me in plural (as respect). Thereafter my SIL touched my feet daily till her marriage and on all days she stays with us whenever she visits our house. My BIL touches my feet everyday. After his marriage his wife (my younger Co SISTER) also touches my feet everyday after Pooja. None of the namaskara is half done as just bending etc. Always the head is placed on my foot. It is getting long. Answer to your 2nd question, Reema & Vinneta tomorrow / day after. Ashirvads & all the best for exams once again. ---Your ANU AKKA. Name: reema Country: India Comment: namaste anu akka!i too have the habit of touching the feet but my parents lift me up and embrace me before actually touching the feet!butnow my mother in law insists that i must kneel and touch her feet! once when i bowed down she made me repeat it because i had touched only her saree but not her feet!everyday i have to do it! Name: vineeta Country: Malaysia Comment: pranams anu akka!do your BIL and co sister touch your feet?how are your feelings then?do you really make them touch your feet or lift them up before they complete the act? SHOULD WE KNEEL DOWN OR IS IT ENOUGH IF WE JUst put our hands down?my dance teacher insists that i must bow down and touch her feet everyday before class!being born and bought up here i dont know whether its actually needed? Name: RAM1111 Country: India Comment: Dear Anu AKKA /DIDI PRANAMS, Thanks for reply. Sory, for delay in our reply. Our Exams r going on. 1) V want ur experience with MIL which makes u consider her GODESS. 2) V r confused about ur opinion on luv marriage. Is it wrong according 2 our tradition ? lot mor 2 ask but exam pressure. V wil ask later. Ur blesiings have workd. V have done wel so far. PRANAMS once again frm all of us Name: Satya Country: India Comment: Dear Ramesh Its very nice that you touch your music teachers feet howold is she? if she is an experinced teacher you shoud wash her feet and drink that water as she is equal to goddess saraswathi Name: Arun Country: India Comment: Dear Anu akka it was very nice to here from you about such good habits I amthe way yu resect yur elders you also getting the same from your yonger ones (likeyour BIL and wife, your siblings etc)pls share when all they touched your feet Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear RAM1111, I think my earlier comment was too long and after cutting it short, I was able to post it. I am in a hurry, Lots of good wishes & blessings Your Anu AKKA /DIDI Name: Anu Country: India Comment: 1. My MIL was not related prior to our marriage !!! It was not a marriage within relations. 2. LOVE cum ARRANGED Marriage. Of cource both my husband and myself are from the same community & hence there was no opposition from both our families on the community aspect when my husband revealed about the love to my MIL & FIL. (I had no courage / too shy to open my mouth .. Or I waited as my husband would anyway open up and bring his parents to see me traditionally and inform my parents also). Love/ Dedication / bonding with husband due to the way I had been brought up & of course due to pre existed love of about 2.5 years. 3. From the date of marriage till date, I am living with my dearest MIL (in-laws), 18 months back my brother-in-law got married (my husband's younger brother) and we are all HAPPLILY living together. Both my CO-SISTER & myself never ever dreamt of seaprating. In fact while going to my parental place for certain festivals & delivery etc. I have literally cried (as newly wedded brides cry for leaving parental home) for leaving my MIL though I was happy to meet my parents, brother, sister etc. It was a mixed feeling to be honest. My CO-SISTER's experience is not different either !! I really miss touching my husband's feet and my MIL's feet during those days. 4. very Difficult to advice because in our society & culture LOVE MARRIAGE has both advantages & disadvantages. I will have to narrate how I was able make it a success. I will do it later. Bye for now, With lots of good wishes & Blessings YOUR New Anu AKKA (DIDI) Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear RAM1111, Many Ashirvads (Blessings) to all of you my dear little sisters. You can call me as you wish. But i am unable to give my detailed reply to your questions as I am getting a message that my comment is not posted as it is against the rules & regulations of this website. I am unable to get the rules & regulations also. I will go thro' the same, modify my comments as needed and post again. Name: Ram1111 Country: India Comment: Respected Anu ji, After reading ur detailed comment I feel I can clarify lots from U. I am 18 year old girl studying in bengaluru. lot of my frnds also eager 2 know more from u. in fact v r all reading this 2gether. can I call you DIDI / BHABHI (tell me ur preference) or anything of your choice. I cant ask any of my doubts with my family elders (my mother is abroad with father I am in hostel). even if my mother is there, gereration gap and I am very very shy. PLEASE... Now few of my questions (my frnds also) 1) Is your mother in law (MIL) related to you earlier to marriage like your father's sister / mother's brother's wife ? because I have not come across anyone describing MIL as GODESS. May be they have mentiond OK/GOOD. 2) urs is lov r arrangd marriage ? How such dedication/ lov /affection & bonding with ur husband ? 3) R u living stil with in-laws MIL /FIL ? 4) some of my frnds feel lov marriage is better but some are afraid (I am also afraid) What is you advice ? More questions later. Hope I am not disturbing you. PRANAMS frm all of us Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Dear Tashi U.S.A., Tradition of doing namaskara / Charan Sparsh / touching feet is not just for married people but for everybody. As far as I know, children below 5 years are normally not allowed to do it.. (If needed I will explain the idea behind the same later). Also the tradition does not bar women from touching feet of their would be husbands before marriage. If you are sure of marrying that Indian person, You can go ahead and touch his feet (I did it before my marriage on my engagement day and on several occasions before my marriage). It definitelty would not be inappropriate. But if you are still not sure of marrying him, then there is a way to show him that you respect his culture--Touch the feet of any of his elderly family members like his MOTHER / ELDER SISTER and take their blessings. All the best. My husband is elder to me by 5 years and every morning and night I kneel before my husband and touch my forehead to his feet in addition to touching his feet with both hands and then touching the hands to my eyes & heart several times. If my husband is awake (first thing I do after getting up in the morning is touching my husband's feet and some times he would still be sleeping), I would never get up on my own. He has to lift me up after blessing me. Also he has to promise me that all my mistakes for that day are forgotten & forgiven (if I had done any) when I touch his feet in night. Something like Arati's experience. But my husband is really great and says sorry from the bottom of his heart if there were any mistakes from his side and thus we never carry forward any quarrel of the day beyond the night and let it spoil our good/sweet night. We discuss at what point of time during the quarrel each one could have reacted better (always he mentions where he could have still adjusted and I mention where I could have adjusted) in a very relaxed way after this feet touching ritual as that would have taken away all EGO out of me and him too (reminding his responsibility as the elderly partner). This ritual has also helped us in understanding each other better and we had hardly disagreements/ quarrel (2-3 times during more than 5 years of married life) and they are sorted out the same night. Always both of us try to please the other. I touch my husband's feet the same way as explained above after doing Pooja also if he is available (he is rarely available except on holidays) and he applies sindhoor on my forehead... Whenever I touch his feet, I don't do it for ritual sake-- I do it from the bottom of my heart, Only his feet would be in my mind while I am doing it till he lifts me and I cherish the sense of his feet on my forehead for quite some time. I worship my husband on several occasions as done by most of the people in our area/ community. I agree with Sindhur,Nisha, Geeta, Sonam, Pinku's comment for maddy, Agree with Anon, not needed to touch feet of undeserving elderly people. Unfortunately people of the TYPE who are responsible for Pasna's and Anon's bad treatment spoil our rich heritage & culture My Mother in law (whom I reagard as GODESS) made me realize What Ankur has stated, Regret a lot I missed it for years, Name: Anu Country: India Comment: Nice Article. Very good views also. I would put my views & experiences soon as I am running out of my time now. Name: gigy Country: Jamaica Comment: ASMITA MADAM I WISH TO BE YOUR STUDENT IN FUTURE Name: gigy Country: Jamaica Comment: ASMITA MADAM I WISH TO BE YOUR STUDENT IN FUTURE Name: gigy Country: Jamaica Comment: fantastic indian tradition Name: ramesh Country: India Comment: touching the feet of the teacher is the most sacred of indian customs!i am 19 years old and learning music! everyday i bow to my teacher and touch her feet!it gives me immense confidence i request asmita madam to share her views as well!not all teachers like students owing at their feet why? Name: ramesh Country: India Comment: touching the feet of the teacher is the most sacred of indian customs!i am 19 years old and learning music! everyday i bow to my teacher and touch her feet!it gives me immense confidence i request asmita madam to share her views as well!not all teachers like students owing at their feet why? Name: ramesh Country: India Comment: touching the feet of the teacher is the most sacred of indian customs!i am 19 years old and learning music! everyday i bow to my teacher and touch her feet!it gives me immense confidence i request asmita madam to share her views as well!not all teachers like students owing at their feet why? Name: ramesh Country: India Comment: dear asmita mam after reading your views even i feel lke bowing and touching your feet NAMASTE Name: Mahesh Country: India Comment: We should touch wifes feet too... if your wife is precious I do that becouse my wife is so precious Name: Sony Country: India Comment: We should touch the feet of parents & elders we all believe we get lot of "ashirvad"from elders.Those who read my comment from then touch your parents feet & elders. Name: sana Country: India Comment: vgwfswswjekrkerkenf Name: maha i touch princess foot Country: India Comment: bvbfvv Name: Mayank Jain Country: Korea Comment: One should lie in one's feet for that person's respct Name: samvrita Country: India Comment: God is a universal wonder, he is beyond the thoughts and knowledge of mankind.While the enormous universe and the revolving spectrum of world is just an unmeasured and unknown illusion to mankind, the creator of these miracles is immensely superior to him.A human being can never equal god, whether he is a man or a woman. On understanding this universal truth, it is insensical for women to respect and treat their husbands 'like gods'. No one can match god. Name: Tashi Country: U.S.A. Comment: Hi everyone. I am an American girl that recently started dating an Indian guy. He said it is a sign of respect to touch one's feet in India. I like him a lot and would like to show that I respect him and his culture by touching his feet, but I am confused if this tradition is just for married people and if it would be inappropriate because we have only dated for about two months? I don't want to freak him out. Please offer some advice wonderful Indian people! all comments are welcome Name: bhavenamanyahoo Country: India Comment: Asmita You and Nithins' wife wre in same line do ypu like to add some thing more from ur life?? Name: Mahesh Country: India Comment: Pinki I wish we would celebrate this time And I wish you should share more about the respect treats you got from ur husband. I also started washing my wife’s feet and drinking that water every night. Nithin… would appreciate if your wife also shares her views Name: Nikita Country: U.S.A. Comment: My husband touch my feet sometimes. I don't know if it is good or bad. Is there anywhere in our tradition like this? Name: Nitin Bhatnagar Country: France Comment: i am a Hindu now (before i was Christian ) i was born and raised in France ,2 years ago we came back to India and i married an Indian girl , she told me that in Indian culture women are worshiped , so every night i touch her feet with my forehead and she blesses me by putting her feet on my head ,and i wash her feet with milk every morning and drink that milk , she says its the secret tradition that a Hindu husband must follow ,also she says that in Hinduism women can beat man but man can never lay a finger on women so whenever she is angry she beats me , and i kneel in front of her to beg for mercy sometime kiss her feet to calm her down....she always keep me at her feet and says thats how its supposed to be... Name: sathi Country: India Comment: Before my weeding my mam always told me that your husband must be a god for you and she also told me that everyday I must touch his feet.After marriage I everyday I touch my husband's feet as per my mam instraction.Even in front my friends I touch his feet and my married friends tells me that they also touch their husband's feet everyday and if it is not possible they must touch on occational days. Name: niki Country: India Comment: I agree too with asmita. Name: bhavenamanyahoo Country: India Comment: Surely a teacher deserve more I salute ur feet and wish to be ur student in future Name: asmita Country: India Comment: My students respect me so mush. On occasion (like teachers’ day, holi etc) they come to me and touch my feet and my husband who is my favourite student (favourite but not best) touch my feet some extra occasion like our marriage anniversary, my birthday etc. Even when any elder guest comes to our house after touching his or her feet my husband touches my feet also. First time they were surprised but now they are also habituated with his custom. Name: soma Country: India Comment: The other night my husband went into the yard and muddied his boots. At his command I bent to wipe them clean with my tongue. Also everyday,at yhe morning when he goes out and at the evening when he comes back,i kiss his shoes. Name: soma Country: India Comment: The other night my husband went into the yard and muddied his boots. At his command I bent to wipe them clean with my tongue. Also everyday,at yhe morning when he goes out and at the evening when he comes back,i kiss his shoes. Name: soma Country: India Comment: The other night my husband went into the yard and muddied his boots. At his command I bent to wipe them clean with my tongue. Also everyday,at yhe morning when he goes out and at the evening when he comes back,i kiss his shoes. Name: bhavenamanyahoo Country: India Comment: Asmitha Madam You are right Teacher is equal to god I am sure you are a good teacher. wish to here from u more about ur students who all given u more respect also share the best treat got from ur fav student Name: asmita Country: India Comment: My husband is 6 yrs younger to me and he was my student in degree level. After graduation when he got job we decided to marry. On wedding night he came to me and then knelt before be and touched his forehead on my feet. From that day every morning he touches my feet with due respect. He respects me as his teacher and in teachers’ day he always give me gift and touches my feet. On our birth days and wedding day he also touches my feet with his forehead. Name: Shalini Country: India Comment: In my family, my mom used to bow down to my dad every day once in the morning and in the evening and take his blessings. It became so habitual that me and my two sisters also followed. My mom would bow down to my dad first and take his blessings. And then we would all bow down to them and take both their blessings. Our mom used to always remind us that your husband is the most important God ever since we were kids and that no other God was important as our husband. It became a belief to us and we believe it. After getting married, I too bow down to my husband and respect him as my God. Name: Pinky Country: United Kingdom Comment: Thank you Mahesh. I believe men and women should be given an equal amount of respect if women touch mens feet then there is no harm in men touching women's feet. :) Name: Mahesh Country: India Comment: Dear Fardeen India is place where respect is give to every individual. Its not just Wife touching husbands feet. Have u heard about Sreeramakrishna ( Guru of Swami Vivekananda) he used to worship her wife Sarada devi ?? I am sure you are not here to say about touching feet as a sign of respect. Pinky I am sure you are so good and deserve lots of respect. Only such people will get respect. Name: Pinky Country: United Kingdom Comment: Thank you Mahesh for sticking up for me :) I think you set a good example for people like Fardeen who now seems to have changed his tune, he once thought that the world would come to an end if women didn't touch their husbands feet. I am not extra smart I am just expressing my views. But thanks for the compliment anyway!!! Name: Fardeen Country: India Comment: Listen all you guys badgering Arati, who are you to tell her what to do and what not to? Why is this extra-smart Pinky deciding on behalf of others what is wrong or right? To each his/her own Name: Mahesh Country: India Comment: Arathy how can u say shut up when someone is expressing their views ?? anyway I touch my wifes feet and I wont allow her to touch mine ...she is taken lots of pain to get me a baby I love her she is my goddess Name: |