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Parent
Traps
What kind
of a parent are you? A perfectionist or a rule maker? A pusher or
an exploder? We present a two-part series of behavioural traps that
parents fall into.
Here are
the first four samples.
Have you ever
thought about what kind of a parent are you? Are you just a demanding mom
or a fussy dad? Can you be your child's best friend? Someone whom your
child can grow to love, respect and trust more than anyone else in the
world. Someone whom your child can come to with his or her worst fears,
hopes, dreams and desires. Someone who is a good listener. Well, that constitutes
an ideal parent.
But life is
not always ideal, and most of us do fall into numerous behavioural traps
time and again. Listed here are a few traps that most parents fall into,
knowingly or unknowingly. The trick is to gauge them, understand them and
learn how to avoid them.
- THE PERFECTIONIST
A
perfectionist is extremely demanding and can make the child feel very insecure.
Such a parent sets unrealistic goals and expectations. The child can never
therefore meet such goals, either in studies or other activities.
Such parents must realize that children will not be able to necessarily
meet the specified standards. A parent should be a pillar of strength,
supporting and encouraging in any circumstance.
- THE PLEASER
A
pleaser will do almost anything to make the child happy. Such a parent
often wants to be loved more than the other parent. Outright appeasement
spoils the child. Irrational love showered on the child allows the little
one to manipulate the situation in his or her favor. Therefore, every parent
must keep his or her self-respect intact before dealing with the child.
- THE RULE MAKER
A
rule maker is a very controlling parent, also extremely rigid and judgmental.
Such parents have a strong code of conduct for the entire household, with
no room for mistakes and lapses. Too many dos and don'ts do not allow the
child to grow in a wholesome and healthy atmosphere. Parents should live
and let live. While basic discipline has to be inculcated, they should
also let the children learn from their mistakes.
- THE BATTLE TANK
This
kind of a parent is ready to shout and fight for the smallest of reasons.
However, aggressiveness batters the child emotionally. Parents cannot be
always screaming at the children. Allow the child to open up, talk and
share thoughts freely. Do not bully at every instance.
Parent Traps-part 2 - Click here to continue…
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