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Groomed For Success
All parents want their children to do well and be successful. However, pushing your children to score higher marks in every exam is not going to ensure success.
Let your child express his individuality
Latha enrolled her son, Mitesh, in tennis lessons, but he didn't show much interest. At first she would force him to go for the coaching class, but pretty soon she stopped pushing, and he quit. Her daughter, Maya, then expressed interest in tennis, and Latha enrolled her in the same classes. Maya now plays regularly, and shows incredible talent for the sport. Mitesh, on the other hand, enjoys music, and attends classical Indian music lessons. He is not necessarily grooming his voice for superstardom, but then again, he just may be very successful in this field. However, the point is that Latha gave her children the freedom to express their individuality, and to focus their energies on hobbies that interest the children, not the parents.
Let your child find his own path. By letting your child take up an activity he enjoys, chances are he will do much better in it than if he were forced to attend. And by doing well, his self-confidence will increase, and so will his motivation to do well in other areas.
Don't ignore your child's opinions
Parents often tend to ignore their children's opinions, as they feel parents know better. When you pay attention to your child's opinions, your child's sense of self-worth goes up. He feels that he has a right to his opinions, and that they matter - especially when they concern him. Of course this doesn't mean you need to give him Pepsi instead of water! What is important is that you discuss his opinions with him and give him a reason every time you defer instead of just ignoring him.
Create an atmosphere conducive to success
Your child doesn't have to go to the best college to be successful, but aiming high is always advantageous. If you want your child to be motivated enough to strive to get into an IIM, IIT or Harvard, pushing him is not the best way to get him there. Instead, create such an atmosphere that your child will aim high on his own accord. Start out by enrolling him in as good a school as you can manage, and take active interest in not just his studies, but in his school life, friends, etc. Follow up his progress with his teachers, and request the teacher to discuss career options with all children.
Encourage your children to speak with your friends or relatives that have graduated from top universities, and read up success stories of individuals that have made it big. If your children regularly interact with such people, then imagining a future where they too have gone to the same universities doesn't seem so far-fetched. On the other hand, if they only hear of universities like Harvard through movies, then actually going and studying there may seem like nothing more than a distant dream.
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