India or America? - Views on Article

Views on Article - India or America? Pornographic comments, solicitation for sex or promotion of other websites, products or companies strictly prohibited. To report any misuse on this page, please click here.

Name: super news that are fun
Country: India
Comment:
GvjwzM I cannot thank you enough for the article. Awesome.

Name: Christoper
Country: India
Comment:
In my opinion, it is an interesting question, I will take part in discussion.

Name: ljMqyvqXJY
Country: India
Comment:
web site buy tramadol 99 - tramadol online saturday delivery

Name: xenical prix
Country: Afghanistan
Comment:
Often pain of treatment of warmth, to Points. the system seem to that Learn its. Help ease find causes pains, that First complement to eating.

Name: rtyecript
Country: Afghanistan
Comment:
I really liked the article, and the very cool blog

Name: Namekasu
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
I think the article is a bit silly. No one can rule out and say bringing up your child is the best in USA or India. It will differ from person to person and family to family. We all take a decision based on what we feel maybe best based on current circumstances after all there are always pros and cons to everything. Sometimes it works out for the best in our favor or it unfortuntately may not. And it can happen anywhere whether in India or USA or Timbaktu. I think the key is to Focus on good parenting and values wherever you maybe.

Name: sanaya
Country: India
Comment:
i m really shocked by most of the anti-indian articles..seems as if its nt indiaparenting site bt anti-india site...so wot all u guys have to say abt patroitism,duty towards your own country...i guess our lives our nw just materialistic..i live in bangalore and agree dat some problems are there bt i knw every problem has a solution.besides if you can afford nothing compares india's luxuries:)

Name: Sara
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
Well, I came to US 10 years back like most of us did. I dont regret that. I had an excellent career, made good money (also respect from society and relatives back in India:) and progressed in technology I work in. I married a wonderful human being from my homeland and have 2 wonderful kids (9 and 5). Growing up from lower middle-class family (my dad was the single bread-winner, *honest* govt servant raised 3 kids successfully!) even basic things were miracle during my adolesence. May be that was the fuel which ignited me to achieve and progress in my LIFE. I'm enjoying whatever I yearned for with my family now. SO when I look back, there are lots of things which went missing.. I was not there with my wife during our first child delivery. My presence was missing during few of my close relative deaths (My father-in-law particularly, a great human being, simplistic and had great values and worse my wife could not even see his face... we could not get flight the very same day and landed 4 days later) and so on.. Now both of our parents are old and I could sense their concern during our telephone chat. They are slowly aging both mentally and physically. We are busy with our lives and our kids are playing with few kids based on play-date here. i dont even kknow that word "play-date" till last 2 years! During our recent trip, I realized how many kids they had to play with and speak our mother tongue. The irony is since their meta-language is English, we need to translate every tamil word to English to make them understand!! I could feel the longiness from both our parents when we left and the difficulty our kids had going back to US. There are few things in life we cant buy with money (seems like MASTER card Ad:), but I realized it during this last 10 years ... I dont want my kids to converse with their grandparents with one-line phrase like "what's up Grandpa?, how is life? etc .." without that bonding. IMO, bonding made most of us better and thats one important thing missing in western world. Like most of us mentioned, "its a very difficult decision to make, but once made you should not regret". I made my decision and following my heart.

Name: Uma
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
So my final conclusion to this is: Both India and USA have its own advantage and disadvantage. Think 1000 times before taking any decision. But do not repent at any time of your life once you make some decision. Because no single route is easy in life. So enjoy your life to its fullest wherever you are, whatever you are :)

Name: Uma
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
I am back again to write about some things that i always Miss here: AUTHENTIC INDIAN FOOD, My favourite chat, Masale poori, Pani puri, Mom's Idli,Grand ma's Masala Dosa, Hmmm, My mouth is watering. MY FAMILY, I really miss my Mom,Dad,Sis,jijo,my sweet nephew and all.I always wanna see them. But they are miles apart :( TEMPLES So many historic temples from Kashmir to Kanyakumari,the Peace of mind we get in these temples,Prasadam we have there.It will be yummy :) A LOT MORE THINGS.

Name: Uma
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
In terms of CULTURE, both India and US are same because, Now a days Most of the Indians are following Western culture itself. In terms of EDUCATION, US is better.Here everything is so systematic, so disciplined and organised. Library facilites are very helpful. In terms of CLEANLINESS, US is far better.No pollution, No bad traffic. Lot of infrastructure we have here. In terms of SOCIETY, We don't have bad relatives problem here who criticise at our every act and make fun of us. But still i wanted to GO BACK to India because my Hubby wants my kid to grow there :( So I am there where my Husband is :) I AM GOING TO MISS THIS LIFE FOR SURE. SO ENJOYING EVERY BIT OF IT :)

Name: K
Country: India
Comment:
I understand that upbringing is more important. In USA you cant even yell at your kid for doing a mistake. Parents are always scared of being acused of child abusement. In this situation it is difficult to mould your child in your culture. The child is exposed to the cosmopolitan environment. And at home he is been given indian culture. He might get confused. It becomes very difficult for parents when their kids become teenagers.

Name: K
Country: India
Comment:
I see that many people here have comented on good healthcare system of USA. I do not agree with this. I live in USA for last 6 years. I visited 2 different doctors for my treatment & both the time they messed uop my case. I had to go to India & get myself treated. Many treatments & meds are not covered by insurance. You can get treamnet in India & spend out of your pocket. Still it is cheaper then USA. Insurance is a big scam

Name: Urilla
Country: Grenada
Comment:
Hello everyone. Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at present. I am from Cyprus and also now am reading in English, give please true I wrote the following sentence: "Tamil disciples for willing mutual and generally regular number teams have been determined." Thanks 8-). Urilla.

Name: Thadeus
Country: Canada
Comment:
Excuse me. Do it now. It is not safe to leave a generous feeling to the cooling influences of the world. Help me! I can not find sites on the: Payday loan. I found only this - sand fleas. To hide itself and to make analysis more difficult, flea uses several encryption layers. Compare prices and find more indoor living products products at pricegrabber. Thank you very much :cool:. Thadeus from Ghana.

Name: Baran
Country: Montserrat
Comment:
Good morning. My nick's Kalinda.wanna see me on my page?. Tell me , have I exactly. I am from Dominican and know bad English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Illustrated site that shows how to get rid of fleas using simple home fleas are bloodsucking insects, and sometimes serious.Dogs and cats rarely become desensitized to flea bites once they develop an allergy." Thank you very much ;). Kalinda.

Name: MO
Country: India
Comment:
Nicely written, living in india has its advantages, our family, culture, food and so on but also had other bad things, society, culture :-) ! ,politics,caste, weather, insufficent infrastructure, poverty and so on.. we can love our kids and develop a well bonded family here in US, but then thats the first generation of immigrants,, things will become different as generations passon, our grand kids here iwll be very different....

Name: ASHISH SAH
Country: India
Comment:
Exellent.I also dream to make india a happy country & I am sure that I will do it.

Name: nilkantnh
Country: India
Comment:
hi am in liv in amerika nice good 50 years plANNING TOWN PLANNING NICE PEOPLE NICE COUNTRY BUT I LOVE INDIA CAUSE OF MY INDIA GIVE ME GREAT MEN SO I LOVE INDIA ILU ILU ILU ILU ILU ILU UIL

Name: swapi
Country: India
Comment:
hey m a india pretty girl.and like independent life.very well written.

Name: Venkat
Country: India
Comment:
I recently moved to Bangalore from bay area california usa. India has not changed much. The same roads, horrible pollution, falling sick often, crazy drivers, corrupt govt. USA rocks. Clean roads, great roads, down to earth people(bay area). I am planning to go back in few months.

Name: Nalin
Country: India
Comment:
After living in multiple countries in the last 10 years, one thing I have realized is that every culture has its own strenghts and weaknesses. So there is no black and white answer here...a good approach would be to have your kids exposed to multiple cultures, though education / jobs etc., and then let them pick the best from each culture. In a global village that our world is turning into, kids with multi-cultural exposure are going to be the fittest to survive the challenges of the future !

Name: yasmin
Country: India
Comment:
I agreed with article and want to say India is not safe for girls .

Name: P Wanjari
Country: India
Comment:
I cannot imagine of spending more years in other country. One day i will definitely go back.....but i dont know how will it be possible for me....i am ready to work on less salary, but dont want to live here just for sake of money.....its true that life is comfortable here, but u will have a lot stress always, u cannot expect to live an indian life here.

Name: P Wanjari
Country: India
Comment:
I came to usa before 7 months for higher education. Instead of spending money, i started earning a littlebit. Before coming here, left my home for the first time. Was little nervous initially, but thought maybe will get accustomed to this culture. But still my thoughts are as it were before. Dont know why people like me get attracted to other countries. Maybe for money or some attraction. I had attraction for this only before coming here. Now i forgot all those things, and just miss my home.

Name: saritha
Country: India
Comment:
I can only say one thing listen to your mind and make sure that its your responsibility to take care of your parents who went through lot of pains in bringing you up and sacrificed a lot for the sake of you

Name: Murali Behara
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
No matter what a saint or a sinner thinks, in the world of rational thinkers, the very basic instinct is survival. We live only once and life is worth living. Disease and Poverty are major detractors in having a productive life and dampens our experience here and now. I know for sure that like me all parents would want their kids to have simple comforts such as clean air, clean water, clean houses, clean streets, clean parks.

Name: Vijay
Country: India
Comment:
Just would want to quote Swami Vivekananda the great seer and sait who shook america 100 years ago also lived for 4 years in USA. Wehn asked how he felt being in a western country and having to return to india all he said i loved india before i came here cany any one of you say this we need patriotism to say this and hardly anything left in you as he said if you proceed after the material civilisation of the west you will be xtinct in 3 generation mind you what happens to you children's children

Name: xyz
Country: Australia
Comment:
Migrants typically are the people of the world that tend to be too ambitious, to particular, and too complicated to handle for the rest of us. The writer is a classic example. Cant just take life as it is.

Name: Murali Behara
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
jeez after reading some comments here, i'm realizing the kind of double standards some of us desis have. "raise boys in USA & girls in India"? aren't corrupting influences the same anywhere in the world? i think, one way to build our childrens' defences to fight against the corrupting influences (in India or Russia or China or USA), is to inculcate the ability to rationalize & understand life better. In fact I always say that the best of India is found outside of india and much of it in United States & Canada.

Name: Murali Behara
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
I'm a parent to who refuses to raise my child in India. Why?! Because it is a 3rd world country! I'm anything but a hypocrite. America has been a number one destination for the best and brightest talent from around the world (not Hyderabad or Bangalore). I wish desis who immigrate to United States would see the nice things about living in a multi-cultural sophisticated futuristic society. There is no harm for parents to grasp the world through the eyes & minds of their children who go to schools here. Please do not corrupt the minds of your kinds with all sorts of biases. There are very few places you get to interact (& also bond with) people of so many cultures, ethnicities (the common denominator is that humanity and character). That is the most wonderful thing about this USA or Canada.

Name: sindu
Country: India
Comment:
Ultimately, choose the environemnt which is best for your child. The US is a clean place with good medical facilities and many other opportunities. Why shouldn't someone want the best for their children?

Name: lokolooo
Country: Indonesia
Comment:
okokokokokod dnd dbnfif sjd dodnddndhjdjdndndn dpmajs

Name: Uma
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
really got confused by reading so many views. I thouhgt India would be best for my daughter. But if I look at India (atleast HYD), its no more the same place where I used to be 7 years back. Now I think the only thing that matters is the way we upbring our children. Parents play a vital role in a kid's life and its we who have to teach the values and culture to our kids. We need to guide them in a proper way to make them understand what is right and wrong.

Name: Uma
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
I really got confused by reading so many views. I thouhgt India would be best for my daughter. But if I look at India (atleast HYD), its no more the same when I used to be there 7 years back. Now I think the only thing that matters is the way we upbring our children. Parents play a vital role in a kid's life and its we who has to taught the values and culture to our kids. We need to guide them in a proper way to make them understand what is right and wrong.

Name: Vikram from Hyd
Country: India
Comment:
One more thing I forgot to mention, I recently saw the movie "namesake". Its a movie by Mira Nair. Go watch it. I am very encouraged by that movie to go back to India. America is No heaven. You pay a big emotional price to live and work for this country USA and its not worth it.

Name: Vikram from hyd
Country: India
Comment:
I have been living abroda for almost 10 years now. Recently my father expired in India. All my cousins and relatives are very happy in India and we here in the USA despite all the comforts are very stressed out all the time. I am planning to go back to India for good. Not for the sake of my kids, but for myself. Definitely India is the best. We get everything in india today and life is simple and straight forward. yes there will be some problems like traffic, pollution and corruption. Well there are too many problems here in the USA too. Life is too complicated here. And racism is slowly increasing here. No matter how good you are at work, you are considered not better than any american... I am not going to die here in this strange land and I dont want my kids to settle here. I cannot miss my family and relatives back in India and want my kids to have lot of cousins in life rather than living a sick soletary life like an American. I am saying all this after being very successful in US and living here for 10+ years. I cannot wait to go back. Planning is going on. India is best for Indians...

Name: KMN
Country: India
Comment:
I am sailing in the same boat as India or America? I want to goback India but not immediately? Currently my daughter is studying 3 grade. Do you think would it be a wise thing todo, asking kids (my dauhter) to return India during their intermediate 1 st year?

Name: subha
Country: U.S.A.
Comment:
hi, usa is systamatic and rich country. you can give them good health, education and safety environment when compare to India. whereas India is not a bad option to live with, minimum pear pressure to make wrong decisions in life, realxed life style. u can live your life instead of running behind it. yeap. it teaches the meaning of relationships and self satisfaction/

Name: R2I
Country: India
Comment:
There should not be any discrimination between boys and girls no matter where they live.

Name: bindu
Country: India
Comment:
If you have a base in India,its a good option to attain ur higher education abroad and then come down and settle in India.

Name: pramiti
Country: united kingdom
Comment:
1st of all i want to give big thanks.I have a 6 months baby boy and u wont believe i just thought like u that for us its ok but for my baby is it good this place? Here is different culture and lots of question were in my mind but after reading ur article i m totally agree with u ,its all depends how u taught ur child .thanks again.

Name: mim
Country: india
Comment:
but i do agree that where ever u go u must have the same upbringing .

Name: Mim
Country: india
Comment:
I think that India would be a better place to raise kids and live there for yourself because think of all the stuff we are missing out on ,I mean look at the kids over there , they are having the fun of their lives and over here what do you see ? the kids have no life here but school & home . America is a okay place to live but it doesnt provide much as like india because America provides wealth and status now think why did indians come from india ? just to earn a name but once they come here they know what they missed out on . Some people say that india is not a good place to live , let me guess because of the goverment, and corruption ? If u look now you see that America is the same , look at the wars happening , and all the corupt things that are going on & think do u really think that America is a good place to raise ur children ? I mean look at the teens & kids here . and india is progressing . Watch the news , do u see any news or anything about politics on it about india? how they are corrupt and stuff ? and now look what are the news reports on America ? lots of corrupt news . And here is a thought that did u enjoy more in india or now in America. I live here too and I like it here but I miss india and so of all the people i know here . p.s - Kids over here say they would rather live here than india cause they never been to india , they dont even know what india is about .

Name: rashmi
Country: thailand
Comment:
well said Rajesh ,its all same in which ever country you bring up its the education and love you give yr child matters a lot and the way they take life may be different when they grow so why worry abt future ,so live happily where ever you are and be satisified with what you have .

Name: Shocked!!!
Country: united kingdom
Comment:
From scrolling through the comments it sounds like nothing bad ever happens in India. - well newsflash it does!!! IN both places you have positive/negative points - it depends on what you want from life and for your children. I'm a little disturbed by the article where it states that she wants her child to need her - surely it is our responsiblity to bring up our children so that they can cope by themselves - even if you choose to spoil them - if they should loose you or ever find themselves in a situation where they have to make their own decisions - will you be right by their side? Probably not? Your child will always love and need you - its ok to discipline them - in fact they'll probably love you more. I agree with what many of you say in that its not so much where we bring up our children but how. Many people (not Indians) are going to India for their education - Indians across the world are considered to be hard working and intelligent - I truly beleive that the standard for higher education, particularly in Maths and Science is far better than in many western countries, so for this we should be proud. The most important thing for us is to ensure our children do not loose their heritage - its vital they continue to speak our language, eat our food and follow our customs - natural evolution will change some of the traditions but the basics should always stay. I have many friends in London that have come from South Africa - most of them only speak English or Africaans - and they all say they feel that something is missing - when an old person approaches them in the street and they can't even begin to understand what they are saying - it makes them feel really stupid. Bottom line - it doesn't matter so much where you bring up your children but they must know right from wrong - but clearly each country has its advantages - only you know whats best for your family.

Name: Divya
Country: usa
Comment:
Definetely India! I am 22 years old and i have lived my first 11 yrs in India and my second 11 yrs in America. Being in both countries part of my life made me realize that i am very well favored in being in India and being raised there and raising my children there someday. What can i say East or West, India is the best! :)

Name: Well travelled Indian.
Country: india
Comment:
I think it's important to teach the kids values to be a good human being this can be done wherever the parents are. The problem starts when living in a foreign country thearents expect the children to be like they themselves were all those years ago. India is constantly changing so don't think of it as a place that you lived in. Don't shift back only to teach 'indian culture' to the kids ,just love them they will grow up good. Just make sure the foundation is strong they will learn all you want them to but they will also not lose their indivisuality. So the place dosen't matter so much anymore with today's change and technology ,world's getting smaller .

Name: radha
Country: usa
Comment:
I have 2 kids - 20 and 24. been living outside india for the past 26 yrs in various countries. we moved to US when my kids were 5/9 respectively. T everyone with a concern, i have never knows a moments regret that they are not raised in india. Both of them speak my mother tounge and most importantly are tolerant and opem minded individuals. Still come home for vacations and semester breaks and are on their way to a great education. In fact they know more of their religion than their counsins or i should say more of how their religion behoves them to live .To you prents with young kids all i would say is expose them to our culture and also let them grow freely. western influence is not bad. being an independent thinker is not bad. Even here in the US lying /cheating/killing/strealing is bad. so as long as your kids absorb these values how does it matter in what form they do. be it thru stories of ramayan or visits to the templ, all they need to know is how to live as good human beings the way they learnt hat doesn't matter.

Name: meenakshi
Country: india
Comment:
I think the child have to grow with their parents love and affections. So how can it be possible back to India while the parents are in USA. If parents are ready to go back to india after leaving the luxurious life in USA, then it is possible to go back to India. But it is possible if the child is very young because otherwise the child will not agree for back to india.

Name: Rekha
Country: usa
Comment:
Life is not just earning money..Life is something else too!! That "something" else is completely lost in USA. I think going back to India is better.

Name: mad
Country: usa
Comment:
i agree with jay rajesh and other like minded that no place is bad r good. if its so then i think kids in india will be only sri ramas and sati savitris. [just think whether its that way?]. i think instead of thinking what they may turn in future, try and do ur best as parents and leave the rest to destiny. its a cycle. our parents were worried abt our future and now its our turn. world is never perfect for parents[including us]. enjoy the bliss of parenting.

Name: Ruchi
Country: india
Comment:
Hey y u all r leaving our nation its our nation plz be here only first of all serve ur country it is something only urs.being a 2nd class citizen in a foreign country it is better to be a 1st class citizen in our own india.

Name: Kaushik
Country: usa
Comment:
I am in the US for the last few years because of my job which is still India based and I represent India here in the states.Stated below are strictly my personal opinions and should be treated as such.I firmly believe that we need to do what history has taught us. Stay in a developed country,get self developed and then go back and try to develop our own nation. Someone would now say that what is there to go back,especially the teen age group(25-45)that is in the US and I agree that India has a long way to go, but imagine what would have happened if the TATAS ,AMBANIS,OR more recently AZIM PREMJI or NARAYAN MURTHY would have said that? It is not always that the sea has the same tides,it keeps on changing and changing for the good. afterall our children are the future of our country and not for some other country.When I say that US or UK or any other developed country is good for our kids because of social or economical life,I need to remember that it is infact my own guilt that I try to hide from my own future.In short,I need to go back to India and raise my kids there in a socially,diversified society.

Name: Anuradha
Country: usa
Comment:
Hi, We have been in USa with our daughter(now almost 2 yrs), as of now i feel no difference in raising her..as we are around the Indian people. She is learning kannada,english,hindi too as my neighbour is north indian. Yeah, as they grow and get in touch with american culture..slowly confusion will start. Whatever..i want to go back to india once she is arnd 3 and half. As I like her to grow watching and playing with my relatives and parents. Anu

Name: eleni
Country: usa
Comment:
ppl here r treated the same in both countries...buh ndn teenagers think that india is not that gr8 compared 2 america

Name: MAX
Country: india
Comment:
BRAINDRAIN IN INDIAN YOUTH TODAY,PEOPLE THINKING RAISED TO A HIGHER LEVELS.GENERALLY THEY OFTEN PURSUE THEMSELFS TOWARDS FOREIGNCOUNTRIES,SETTLEING THERE GETTING EDUCATION THERE IS NOW BECAME A STATUS SYMBOL.BUT FOR SOME PEOPLE THERE COUNTRY IS THE BEST.FOR EX-IN INDIA MANY PEOPLE OPPOSE THIS BRAINDRAIN WHICH AFFECT BADLY NATION AS WELL AS PEOPLE OF THAT COUNTRY.SPECIALLY TODAY'S YOUTH CONSIDER GOING ABROAD AS NOT A BIG DEAL.THEY NEED HIGHER AND CLASS EDUCATION TO SHINE IN THE SOCIETY ,BUT THEY FORGET THAT WHAT THEY WILL GET IN THEIR OWN COUNTRY WILL NEVER BE PROVIDED BY ANYOTHER COUNTRY.THAT SPECIAL THING INCLUDES RESPECT,LOVE,CARE AND THE SENCE OF SAFETY. IT IS NOT WRONG TO GO TO ABROAD AND AQUIRE WORLD CLASS EDUCATION BECAUSE INDIA TO WANT YOUTH WHO ARE SPECIALIST IN DIFFERENT FIELDS BUT,SETTLING DOWN THERE CREATES A HUGE LOSS TO THE COUNTRY.AS THE COUNTRY GOES ON LOOSING SKILLED PERSON�S IT RESULTS IN PROBLEM�S LIKE UNEMPLOYEMENT, POVERTY ETC.SO IT IN THE FAVOUR OF THE COUNTRY TO USE THERE SKILL IN THERE OWN COUNTRY.IT WILL DEVELOP COUNTRY AS WELL THE LIVING STANDARED OF THE PEOPLE.THIS IS THE PLOUR OF EVERY YOUTH OF INDIA TOWARDS IT TO DO SOMETHING FOR THE WELFARE ANR PROSPERTY OF INDIA. FROM MY POINT OF VIEW THE YOUTH CAN GET THERE IN ABROAD BUT,THEY SHOULD NOT WASTE BY WORKING IN THAT COUNTRY BUT SHOULD USE IT IN INDIA FOR IT�S DEVELOPMENT .THEN ONLY WE CAN SAY THE INDIA IS THE BEST BECAUSE IT�S CITIZEN�S ARE THE BEST.SO THE YOUTH SHOULD KEEP THIS IN MIND AND THEN MAKE UP THEIR DESIRE TO DO SOMETHING .AS INDIA TOO HAS SOME RIGHT TO ACHIEVE SOMETHING FROM IT�S PEOPLE WHICH IT SHOULD BE GET DONE.

Name: ashish
Country: india
Comment:
heyyy i want to settle in u.s.a so plz any nri girl marriage with me so plz mail me on ashish7474@yahoo.co.in

Name: nilani
Country: Canada
Comment:
I perosnally think it doesn't matter where your raise yor child,but the way you raise your child is the one that matters. I've been living in canada for almost 17 years now. I'm 25 and i'm a mother of 4 children.MY husband is a Jamaican, we got a love marriage.we been married for 5 years now. We both teach each other our culture and our children is now cabale of speaking 2 language,they could speak my mother tongue(Tamil)and english.we go to temple becuas ei'm hindu and we go to church because my husband is Christian. We pratice both of mine and my husband's culture. We eve go visit india every other summer.so my whole point is that my children is just capable of growing up in canada and learn both of their parents culture.

Name: indian
Country: USA
Comment:
I think it is all bull shit in america and all the selfish indian people live here in usa beacues of their own weknesses like money, girls, cars etc and then when they are forty they suddenly wake up and say oh my god what happen to my kids. Introverts selfish wanna be goras

Name: JJ
Country: India
Comment:
need valuable advice and comments...how about letting the children continue education in india and mother stay with the children and take care of them till they reach teen age and then migrate them for their further studies. but here the parents have to sacrifice or compromise their comforts in life for the sake of their children....

Name: Chandresh Purohit
Country: India
Comment:
Hello Everybody, Myself Chandresh from Baroda, Gujarat. Actually I am arranging cultural and tracking camp at various places in india. Now, I inviting here to all NRI's for learning them child Indian Culture including great tracking side experience at india. if you have any query plz contact me at my mail :purohitchandresh@yahoo.co.in

Name: Sonia
Country: USA
Comment:
I think the place doesnt matter, its all about your values and your culture that how you raise your child.

Name: Jay
Country: Other
Comment:
I was born in NZ to Indian parents who were brought up outside of India. As I am now a parent myself, this issue is on my mind a lot. It is especially on my mind because almost every person I know of Indian descent who was not born in India are "lost souls". Neither here nor there. They feel conflicted and confused. At a time when they should be figuring out who they are and what is the purpose of their life, they feel so much pressure to conform to a culture that can be very narrow minded and judgemental of non-conformity. AFter much turmoil, I have finally realised that the problems stem from the attitudes of those that leave India in the first place. Indian parents who leave India to live in western countries become so paranoid about the influences of Western culture on their children that they fail to nurture their children into confident, self reliant human beings who are able to reach their potential no matter what. Instead, Indian parents try and hang on to bits of Indian culture that is often related to the past - perhaps even their grandparents past. They become so concerned that their children marry in caste, and carry on the bloodline, that they forget the purpose of life is not to preserve our past but to learn and grow to our fullest potential. It is confusing for Indian children growing up in Western countries to be taught cultural things that cannot be explained by their parents. By blindly following religious practice and food constraints, what are you teaching your child? To obey and follow without questioning or understanding why? I suggest that those who leave India and have children overseas need to accept that their child is never really going to understand how you grew up. Their experience is always going to be different from yours. I suggest that you need to look very carefully at your own values (not religion) and decide how you are going to educate your child to be proud of his or her cultural heritage but know that it is up to him or her to make the decisions on how much of these values he or she is going to put into practice in their life. Take the good things from our culture and pass them on. Meditation/ yoga/ seeking of knowledge and empowerment. With the destructive things like requiring conformity, obedience, blindly accepting what others do without questioning their moral consistency, you have to analyse your own lives. Your children will be watching you more closely than you think. They will pick up on inconsistencies between what you preach and what you do. You cannot expect your child to view marriage as positive thing if you have not worked at making your marriage a good, positive example. You cannot expect your child to respect a culture that preaches religion and yet the very people who practice that religion are quick to tell lies or forge documents if that will get them what they want. Being a parent is a privilege. You only get one chance to be good in each child's life. Your only oligation is nurture that life to its fullest potential. It is not to control the environment or the child. By choosing to leave India, which in most cases is motivated by financial considerations, be expected to face more complicated issues than you have ever faced. Be prepared to face yourselves and your upbringing - if you don't your children will. Be prepared to accept cultural changes - this is called evolution. The country you left, will not be the same when you return. If you wish things to have stayed they same then you are probably stagnant and not living life as it is meant to be lived. Give your child the right tools in life and you may be pleasantly surprised at how far they can go. Glad to see so many of you are thinking of this issue.

Name: Rajesh
Country: India
Comment:
Here are my views: + Points of 'Settling' for life here: > You will become Crorepati in the coming years/decades. > You will 'earn' NRI tag. > You will show the US to your parents and very close relatives who can't come on their own expenses. > You can potentially contribute to India's socio-economic conditions. By charities or probably setting up a company of your own in future (like many NRIs did all these years). > You will get represent India abroad in the coming decades. Especially if you are interested/talented in Indian culture/arts/movies etc,. > You will get greater scope to develop/apply your skills. There is absolutely no doubt that you will be a "ECONOMIC" success. + points of Going back to India: > Life normal. Back to relatives, family, food, friends, movies, cricket... > You go back where you are born. And feel at "Home" every minute of life. And feel that the "Country/Land" is yours. > Depending upon your "Skill Level" you may help country with your skills. But in general I believe India has 'enough' educated population to take care of the country needs/jobs. Ofcouse what country lacks is educated Politicians. So if you as educated and seen-the-world person join Politics, it might do more good to the country. -ve Points: > Lose on income, unless you are very bright/lucky person. But you will be more comfortable (maid service and parent's help in life) than in US. > If you have to settle in state where your mother-tounge is not spoken, you will have the alien-language problem. But may be better than alien-people problem abroad! > If you are in IT, you may require to travel abroad and be away from family for which you returned. But you can choose not to. LAST POINT: Don't worry about KIDS!!! They are not going to lead a life like yours. Now-a-days love, dating, pre-marital-romance, sex, inter-caste/religion, inter-language marriages are COMMON in Indian Cities where the return-NRIs ought to settle. So no matter where you bring up your Kids (US/India) they may give you heart-breaks when they grow up. Here in US kids go away from home around 18/19. We do in India probably around 21/22. In general the DECISION IS YOURS. It doesn't necessarily has to be for your kids-sake. Even in US, there are plenty of Indian Kids of second generation who cherish our food and like our culture. May be they don't like our movies and some of our customs/culture. But they don't it with an open mind. Take your call. But I would not worry about it right now. May be one bright day after 5/6 years, I will need to decide to leave the US for good OR NOT. - regards Rajesh Kamisetty

Name: binds
Country: India
Comment:
i think that both countries are good. India is all about the culture while america is all about freedom. If it wasn't for the financial oppurtunities, indian people would have not set foot on this nation. India needs to find a way to curb its population and cleanse it's political system. This probably would not happen. If kids are born here in america, parents should inform their kids about indian culture and the way of life. THey should take them to indian temples, restaurants, and india as well.

Name: saugato banerjee
Country: USA
Comment:
It will also be very interesting to see that if tomorrow usa was to lose its monetary might as the soviet union did, and lifestyle fell dramatically, what the current crop of indian immigrants would do. im sure they would run back to india like a pack of rats escaping a flooding basement. americans would, ofcourse, sweat and toil and bust their guts to get their country back on top again. but the cultured, respectful, superior indians would tuck tail and scamper back..which would just go to prove that we are nothing but bloody hypocrites. if given a choice, an indian would be a slave in heaven. an american would be a king in hell.

Name: Saugata
Country: USA
Comment:
In many ways the current India represents the repressed world trying to break free, while the current USA represents the free world trying to tame itself. A writer above mentioned "Also there are many facts of american culture that cannot be digested by most indians - self-centric behaviour - me, mine, very little respect for elders, dating, partying, night outs, bf/gfs" But are we kidding ourselves? * Can respect be given by default and not earned? * Is it really wrong to have your kid move out when he/she is 18 instead of coddling him/her? isnt it selfish to keep them around longer just cuz you cant do without them? Shouldnt it be that you should be able to teach a kid all heshould know about till he is 18 and after that let him make his own mistakes/successes? * If we werent self centric and selfish, would we have left our country and come here in the first place? spending our prime years not serving the country which fed us and brought us up but in a foreign land? Isnt every person selfish? * Didnt we yearn to date and party in our youth ourselves instead of furiously running a rat race, overworked and pressured to get into an IIT or become a doctor? I have seen that a person can truly live free only here in the us. He can make choices right or wrong, but he is free to chose.

Name: maya
Country: England
Comment:
well..all the ppl living abrod do decieve themself thinking that after my child becomes 6-7 years old we will go back ..frankly i think they r decieving themselves and trying to prolong their stay in forgin land..what about kids? do u think its fare on them? adjusting to india enviornment will be very hard for them. if somebody wants to go back than sooner than better.

Name: Mr H. H. Shah
Country: USA
Comment:
The argument is tough but myself and my wife have debated this issue for two years now. To give some background I am in USA since 7 years and we want to go back home to Bombay as soon as our kid is born. My guage which guided me to this decision was simple. Use Historical evidence and then decide. Look around and see the kids of your uncles or aunts or someone who has been here. See what kind of character and culture they share. Then compare it to your relatives back home. See how those kids are raised...and now the toughest part to do is Analyze using Critical Thinking. This I feel has been the toughest part...We talk about kids but we need to question ourselves..Its us who dont want to leave the materialistic life and the comforts here. Once my colleague told me "In your life, pick the problems you want to solve !" Life is all about picking the problems you would like to solve..Hope this thought helps. I tried to think Objectively and here are some of my observations: 1> Relegious Background: I come from a relegious Jain Family.. It was tough for me to come to USA and then eat onions and potatoes. If my kid goes to school and eats Hamburger without knowing whats wrong with it when all his colleagues are doing the same,thats not the problem I wish to solve. On the contrary I can solve the problem about him not living in a 1500 Sq Feet single family home with backyard and frontyard which I own.I can do with a 1000 sq feet apartment in Mumbai 2> Culture and Respect: I guess Indian social and culture value is much into respect for elders no matter if they are wrong or right. These values a kid learns from about say 5 years to 15 years. The key years of kids life..I think to get the feel for what relatives are can only happen when you are around some. If all ur relatives are here maybe its easy. India's social structure is not surrounded around Bank Balances and your net worth. Its more about content of the values in the kid.His education and his character..I can steer a kid into right track in India.if at all he is on wrong track.here If I get little strict I might land up in Jail. Relegious festivals in India no matter how much you dislike them after coming here are geared towards getting families closer and instigating family values. 3> I want to raise him/her the way I was raised: This is probably most suttle and intuitive of all..If the kid turns out like I did, I think I did a great job. Now look back at your historical upbringing..So what was it like when u were in grade 1 or 2 or 5 or 10 Compare it with what it has changed to now in India if your kid would be brought up there and then delta it with what if he was brought up in USA....and now the toughest what does your gut tell u... "In your life, pick the problems you want to solve !" "Money is as important in life as you make it to be !!" "Get the foundation till 18-20 years and then let me study in USA if you want !" Hope this helps!!

Name: SC
Country: USA
Comment:
I have been living in the US for 6.5 years now. When I have gone back to India to visit, I have seen children there mimik MTV and their parents let them do so. The environment we are lookign for is the one we were brought up in. We will never find that environment, if at all we do, it might be only in smaller cities and we definitely willl have to live in a bigger one for our careers. Yes, certainly we have much better material comforts here which give us more quality time to spend with our children. I do not agree with "Do u agree ? Girl should be brought up in INdia , but boys can be brought up in USA. For girls it is not a good place to bring up." You are discriminating between them.

Name: Anu Malhotra
Country: Other
Comment:
We have been living in NZ for the past 6years,me and my husband always debate on the topic of raising kids either in India or the western world. I do understand that country you live in has a lot of influence on your culture. But amazaingly Indians who live abroad are more Indians than Indians living in India. I totally agree with the author that environment does not matter.Gr8 article.

Name: Vikrant Sharma here
Country: England
Comment:
india is instituion in itslef welll i am not a regular user to this website . i am indian student doing masters in business and found the same problem in UK but what i realized that the standard of educatoin in india is wordclass if one is more particular about western style of education then send ur kids to mussorie, doon , where there are world class schools for people living abroad i am telling you it is only and only environment which influences others for life time in america any kind of brinup will be useless bcoz the child doesn't know the priorities in one's life it is nothing to do with indian or india it is to do with the rich heritage we indians have and the intellectual knowledge and thinking power our community has

Name: ZAk
Country: USA
Comment:
Well people I dont even have a kid and I am thinking about it already. I have attended 2 years of university here in the US and have has friends from a lot of different countries. One thing I think one must keep in mind is Murphys Laws what can go wrong will go wrong. What are you going to tell ur girl or boy when she'd come to you and ask you if she can goto the club, or the prom or date this white guy from her class? Dont do it beacuse I say so (or because we are Indian and are different )? That really never works and in fact when kids go and tell thier peers that they cant do it beacuse they r Indian they r ridiculed at. My observation so far has been that kids specially during their teens think their parents are backward and unclassy as compared to their peers parents and hence loose respect for their parents.

Name: LN
Country: India
Comment:
I am in same boat as many others who stay in US debating India/US. I am being a lil true (hence harsh). As the author says going to India does'nt guarantee good upbringing. But going to India DOES guarantee the environment (which is very important) that you would want your child to grow. It means people speaking the same tongue (mother tongue) following same customs & traditions. How can you belittle this mass effect of environment on a small child? Can we replicate this in our US homes with just 2 adults or grandparents at the most. Obviously not. That is what is culture which is learnt from observing ppl around. Culture is not a subject to be taught at home, it has to be grasped from the surrounding. The children brought up here do miss it out entirely. Also there are many facts of american culture that cannot be digested by most indians - self-centric behaviour - me, mine, very little respect for elders, dating, partying, night outs, bf/gfs. BUT we can all deceive ourselves by talking of american education, clean weather, no corruption. Not to mention that many indian parents cannot hold back their children from moving out (called independence) at 18 just bcos of peer pressure. I still stand at cross-roads on where I want to settle down. But the least I want is to decieve myself into thinking that my child will be brought up as a 'better human being' in US than in India which I know for sure is not true. If I reside in US it will be only for my own selfish reasons - material comforts, easier life as a woman/wife/DIL which means less headache of cooking, cleaning and meeting my hubby's family expectations from me, lesser interference from in-laws and relatives, more privacy as a couple.

Name: VBP{
Country: USA
Comment:
American children may be raised independant but,large number takes care of their parents when they need them,infact when their parents are old I have seen more american children taking care of their parents than we realise.

Name: PG
Country: India
Comment:
Do u agree ? Girl should be brought up in INdia , but boys can be brought up in USA. For girls it is not a good place to bring up.

Name: Sujatha
Country: USA
Comment:
I am still in a dilemma, should i bring up my kid here or in India,tho, the way of bringing up the kid is important, there is something called 'peer pressure' that is a little difficult for parents to make kids understand at such a vulnerable age. So we are thinking of going to India after our kid is around 6-7 yrs.

Name: Gauri
Country: USA
Comment:
Hey, If given a choice we decide to educate her here,in USA.Then its upto us how we mold her into a well behaved n well mannered human.

Name: Tamanna
Country: Middleeast
Comment:
Yes, the place does not matter, its all in the upbringing.

Name: Neha
Country: India
Comment:
very well written.

Enter Your Views on this Article Here

Name or Pseudonym
Country
Comment
	By clicking on the submit button you are agreeing to the terms and conditions of the website which prohibit pornographic comments.

Back to Article