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You are here : home > Values > Forgiveness > What to Do When it is Difficult to Forgive?

What to Do When it is Difficult to Forgive?


Are you finding it difficult to forgive someone? Being forgiving can help you and others to live a better and a peaceful life. Read more about what can be done when it is difficult to forgive someone.

Are you feeling that the person who has deeply hurt you is not worth forgiving? While you are undergoing such circumstances, you must pause and accept the fact that the person is human too. Remind yourself that forgiving is one of the kindest and greatest virtues one can possess. Forgiveness can not only bring about a positive change in the life of the individual who has hurt you, but also create a positive impact on your life.
So, whenever you feel that it is difficult to forgive, consider the plight of the person who has hurt you. Do not make the big deal out of the small issues and if it is a bigger issue figure out the ways to make it a smaller issue. In this way you can make practicing forgiveness easier for yourself. Listed below are some things that you can follow to make it easier for yourself to forgive others.

1. Understand the Circumstances and the Person

It is necessary to understand the circumstances under which an individual was exhibiting difficult behavior towards you. When you understand the reason for such behavior you can easily understand the importance of forgiveness. At the same time, it is necessary to understand the individual who is hurting you. Learn about the problems that he or she is facing. Analyze if your behaviour or any other aspects of your life are indirectly hurting him or her. When you become more understanding, you can easily become capable of always being forgiving.

2. Look at the Positive Side

When you feel that the person is not worth forgiving, maybe you are only considering the negative aspects of his or her personality. Look at the positive or good things that a person has done to you or has done in general at least for the sake of humanity. Looking at the individual from a positive perspective can surely help you to easily forgive the person.

3. Initiate the Beginning of New Friendship

Friendship is the best way to put an end to and forget the hurtful experiences. So, it is always helpful to have better relationships and bonding by initiating the beginning of new friendship. When you will become friends with the person who is hurting you, there will be better bonding between the two of you. Friendship is the best medicine for getting rid of bitter and hurtful experiences.

4. Clear the Misunderstanding

Individuals hurt each other when misunderstanding prevails between them. Therefore, it is better to nip the misunderstandings in the bud instead of hurting and blaming each other. Clearing misunderstanding can help to avoid problems in the future and help you to forgive the person who is hurting you.

5. Extend a Helping Hand

Holding the grudges against each other can prevent both the individuals from growing. Extending a helping hand can help to forget the pain and make it easier to forgive each other. It can also help both the individuals who are against each other to grow.

6. Accept the Change

Be open minded and always ready for the change. Everything is not going to remain the same forever. When you feel that the individual has realized his or her mistake and has changed, you must accept the person and forgive him or her.

7. Take Things Positively

Learn to take things positively and learn from the circumstances that you face. Work towards lifting the person who has offended you. Always aim at helping the person who has offended you to improve so it is easier for you to forgive him or her.

8. Learn from Your Mistakes

Get into the shoes of the offender and try to understand the reason for his or her resentment. In this way you find out if there is any fault in you which is leading to the resentment. Learning about your faults can help you to practice forgiveness with ease.

9. Keep Your Ego Aside

An individual’s biggest enemy is his or her ego. When an individual is able to keep his or her ego aside, he or she can easily forgive and forget the issues. Egoistic individuals can never have better relationships in life. So, it is very important to keep the ego aside to live a life as a better individual.

10. Treat Yourself and Others at Par

Never distinguish yourself from others. You too are a human like others and others too face issues in life just as you do. Do not be biased against anyone. Think rationally and practically and do not let the issues escalate. See, what you would have done if you were facing the same problem as the individual who is hurting you is facing. Forgive each other and help each other to live a better life.
Have an open heart and mind and adopt a positive approach towards life. Every individual comes across different problems in life. Being forgiving in every situation can help you to avoid difficulties in life. So, always be a peaceful and forgiving individual to enjoy the gifts that life has to offer.

Why is it important to be forgiving? What can be done if it is not possible to forgive someone? What kind of consequences can an individual face by being rigid? Discuss here.



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