Arushi Sahai

It was the most beautiful day when my doctor told me that I am pregnant. After the period of nine months I gave birth to a sweet cuddly baby boy. Two year passed in a jiffy. And this was the time, when I experienced the real challenging role as a mother. Saurabh (my cuddly baby) had started talking. He is really talkative. He is a mischievous too. And I love these things about him. However, as he was growing up, he was ceasing to listen to me. By time he reaches toddler, I was drowned with complaints from his teacher, his friends and the like.

In fact, as a mother, I too was feeling a failure. I talked to my mother and examined that it is not just him, it is me who needs to be improvised. So, I started practicing the following:-

1. 1. Softer voice-since, he never use to listen to me, I almost all the time scolded him. My pitch was harsh and high. However, this was my primary mistake. If I could just talk softly he would listen more attentively to me. So, I started practicing soft talks. When I initiated soft talks he seemed more attentive. It was because it is not my loud noise he heard, but the words which he needed to hear. I had passed the first step.
   
   
2. 2. Good language- Yes me the convent educated mother, who was known for her manners, had started using foul language when addressing him. Words with synonyms which meant unintelligent, slow and lethargic always uttered from my mouth. I couldn’t believe I was going so negative. No wonder he was using these terms when addressing others.
   
   
3. 3. Do not be nagging- Instead of nagging, utilise the simple, positive instructions. Instead of saying-“Don’t you dare touch the remote”, it would be better to say, “Baby this is not the good time to watch television”. If you are nice, the positivity reciprocates. The ball is really in your court for the behavior you expect from your little one.
   
   
4. 4. Magic words- Haven’t we been taught in our schools, to say ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’. Well, in that case why not use the same with our children. Right now, we are their school. In fact, we will always be their first school. His manners are definitely important for a positive upbringing.
   
   
5. 5. No comparisons- I ceased comparing him with other child. I noticed that when I compared him, he misbehaved more with that kid. No wonder he was developing a negative impact and a pessimistic attitude.
   
   
6. 6. Talk to him- Spending quality time was so enriching. It started the same as soon as I realized it. Talking to him made me understand him better. When he came home from school, I made sure to give him all the attention. As of now, I love this quality time with my child (I think he does too!).
   
   
7. 7. Prizes- So, whenever he behaved well or listend to me or said something nice, I would give him stars. These stars when accumulated results in his facoriate toy. He was loving it surely!

As of now, I have learnt the biggest lesson of my life. I have learnt to treasure the time. I have learnt that what I teach need to act upon the same.